MUDDYKAT   46,519
40,000-49,999 SparkPoints
MUDDYKAT's Recent Blog Entries


Tuesday, January 19, 2010

A new year.

Once again I am faced with the fact that I'm still carrying all this weight around with me. But I can tell something has changed inside of me. Its not really big, but something is different.

More than 80% of my food choices are good ones. I find myself wanting to exercise and move each day. I also see that I am not carrying around all the anger as in the past. All of these are positive changes. Are there days when I make really bad choices for food? Absolutely. I try and think about why I made such a food choice and realize I usually come up with some lame excuse or reason for eating what I did - but the main reason is because I became lazy about myself and about caring for myself - THAT is what it all comes down to.

Do I want to be 60 and still fighting this problem? NO ABSOLUTELY NOT

I can do this - I have done SO much in my life - I have accomplished much - it may not have been what is on my "list" but when I look back and see how I survived I know that I have it within myself to make changes.

Keep on Keeping on!

Food battle

Thursday, January 22, 2009

I suppose if I would quit thinking of it as a battle, I might actually make steps towards losing this weight.

Portion control seems to be my biggest problem. I'm getting the exercise down, but the food seems to increase when I start exercising more and on a regular basis.

Keeping my mind focused on the goal is difficult - its like I'm scatter-brained when it comes to making better choice for myself when eating. I know what to eat, but I get either bored (of repetative foods) or easily taken off track by social things.

Much of this is due to the "trama" I grew up with.... not wanting to miss a social time with people - to be on the "outs" is a disheartening thing for me. I always want to be included.

It use to be that alcohol and drugs kept me included. Now that I have moved passed all of that - food seems to put me right back into that "social" setting. Not taking the time for me - or ordering the food that is good for me - not making a fuss in front of people or being the "difficult" person. To be liked.

I'll get this figured out one day.

New You Bootcamp

Wednesday, January 21, 2009

It has been interesting to see how I'm changing. The bootcamp has been very helpful in doing regular daily exercise. I haven't really lost the weight, but I can tell that my body composition is changing. Thanks SP!


Wednesday, June 13, 2007

Getting myself motivated can be difficult. Though if I look around me at all my friends and co-workers I suppose it is easier than I think.

Sometimes I think I'm the only one to motivate myself, but that is not true. I look at Arlenia and the motivation she has every day after surviving breast cancer. I look at Karen Wheeler and her motivation and her husbands to stay sober and help others in recovery. Even David who is heading to his dream of moving to his home town in Michigan gives that boost of motivation. So all I really need to do is look around me and see that everyone has their own form of motivation.


Tuesday, June 12, 2007

The quote today from Ralph Walder Emerson is so true.

There was a time when it seemed like the world was totally against me. Everything and everybody was irate and slaming me at every turn. I'm not sure what it was that made me look at myself, but after years of blaming others and my circumstances I awoke to realize I WAS THE PROBLEM.

When I began looking at myself I saw the problem plain and simple.

That was 20 years ago. It has taken me until now to finally get myself together - hopefully it won't take as long for others, but it is always possible to change. ALWAYS POSSIBLE TO CHANGE... theres hope for me yet!