Wednesday, March 24, 2010
One day in the future I will never be sick. Never. On top of that, I will be able to work out with my Wii Fit in the mornings and I will be able to go to the gym in the afternoons.
And then on top of that, I will be svelte and gorgeous in my size 10 slacks. Oh and my Mom will have no reason to say "Honey, you've gotten so fat! You really need to lose some".
Okay, let me get my mind out of daydream land. I have been non stop sick since returning to work in February. I caught my first cold around March the 1st. That lasted for about a week however I never did get my sense of smell back. Next I caught another cold on the 12th. This one I'm STILL getting over. As an extra bonus now, thanks to all the coughing, my left shoulder all the way up to my neck is killing me as the muscle is tight, tight, tight. I could really use a good hot stone massage. My husband, God bless him, tried massaging it out last night as we watched Biggest Loser together last night but it just went right back to being tight and painful.
The thing that frustrates me more than ever about all of this is that while I am sick I tend to gravitate to high fat, high calorie, high sodium, high sugar comfort foods. I actually gravitate to the foods that DISGUST me when I'm healthy.
So instead of making progress, showing my coworkers that Sparkpeople really DOES work, I have actually GAINED weight! On top of that, my blood pressure has gone up (found that out at my last doctor appointment on Monday).
It was actually rather amusing at the doctor appointment on Monday. When I told the doctor that it seems like I get sick non stop (I mean 3 weeks out of a month IS rather excessive, don't you think?) she said "Well, it's not really normal but there is not much we can do that you aren't already doing" sigh. Modern Medicine at it's best. Let's just wait till you get sick and then we'll slap a bandaid on you. Let's NOT be proactive, shall we?
That's why I started actually going to an Acupuncturist in Bel Air (Thanks Packy62! for the referral!). Traditional Chinese Medicine tends to treat the overall problem, rather than the effect. I'd prefer to be proactive in my health rather than reactive.
Well anyways, the goal here is to turn that daydream into reality, right????
The workout in the AM is doable. Just have to wake up early enough. Not a big deal. Hubby gets up at 430am so I could just get up right with him.
Gym in the evenings? That's a bit more difficult. My hubby has offered to cook dinner in the evenings 3 times a week so I could go to the gym but I have 2 sources of guilt on that one.
First the Mommy guilt that I won't be there to help my son with his homework, give him a hug when he gets home, etc.
Second (and this is the stronger one) is that guilt that I'm neglecting my family in order to take care of myself. This was nonstop pushed into me as a child and now as a women by my Mom, the queen of martyrship. (Don't get me wrong, I do love her, I just get annoyed by her)
It takes a lot for me to overcome that one. I almost always get emotional when I watch the Biggest Loser and Jillian Michaels starts yelling at a Mom (whether its an older or younger one doesn't matter) that they were always the one to put themselves LAST and to get ANGRY at that because that's what caused them to be overweight in the first place. Well I do get angry. Really angry. And the thing that makes me most angry and frustrated is that "I" am the one who is doing it TO MYSELF!
I tell my husband non stop when he argues with me that I just need to simply STOP doing this, that's it's difficult, especially when you were raised with this.
Yes, this is an excuse. Not a good one but there it is. I always wonder, how many other Mom's deal with the same guilt issue?
Okay, so I'm dealing with it, or trying to anyways. Trying to overcome and conquer and be the best I can be, etc, etc, etc.
And now after all of this I realize, I am rambling. This is what I get for trying to write a blog when I'm at work and it's busier. I lose track of what I'm trying to say.
Back to the positive now (I'm at lunch so now I can think) Hhhhm. How to make it work? PM workouts may be slightly tough. Maybe I'll make a deal with hubby and only make him make dinner one weeknight each week? I should check out the gym on post here and see if they have any evening classes that I would be interested in.
Maybe I'll make a quick stop there after work today. Trick is I have to find something at the end of the day that is a HEALTHY and POSITIVE stress release for me. Right now stress release at the end of the day is a glass of wine. NOT good.
There is one good thing coming up. My garden. This is my biggest undertaking yet. Never before have I had a large one like I plan to have this year. Right now my seedlings are just that, seedlings. But soon we'll be planting outdoors and then will come the non stop work of weeding, trimming, harvesting, etc. BIG stress release for me. I love working in a garden. Plus it's a good workout too. That's what I call win-win.
Okay, I seriously need to end this blog. It's the end of my lunch and this thing has gone on for more than long enough.
Monday, March 15, 2010
Joy oh joy.
This past week I was making pretty good progress. I was watching what I was eating, drinking lots of water, etc. I didn't get much exercise in but still I managed to start dropping weight.
However then Saturday going into Sunday happened.
My husband was on temporary duty recently and he was due to come back on Saturday night/Early Sunday morning. So I did what so many military wives do (even though we all know that our soldier probably won't even notice all the hard work we did), I stayed up till 1am cleaning, cleaning, cleaning.
Laundry, vacuuming, dusting, cleaning my cat's litter box, etc.
By 1am I flopped into bed, gratefully and promptly fell asleep. By 330am my husband arrived back home. We fell asleep again however then our wonderful son woke us up at 7a.
So that meant ALL Sunday we were over exhausted zombies that consumed large amounts of chocolate, soda pop and other high calorie treats. So I'm right back now at square 1.
WHY DO I NOT LEARN? I know how I get when I'm sleep deprived. I know that my will power is weakened when I don't get enough sleep. Only positive to it is that the house looked pretty nice afterwards.
Good news is hubby has announced (once again) that he has to get "SERIOUS" with using Sparkpeople. Here's to hoping that he stays motivated.
Saturday, March 13, 2010
In gardening that is..........................
Day 3. First planted 03/10/03
Arugala seems to be growing fastest (as usual); cucumbers are sprouting; snow peas are most definitely sprouting and I have noticed one or two squash coming up.
Still having issues with the dang fungus gnats but I got a bag of sand today and spread some on the soil of all plants in the house. The darn little things seem very agitated. GOOD! GET OUT OF MY DARN HOUSE YOU STUPID STUPID GNATS! Can you not learn from the previous occupants, the aphids, that you are not welcome here. LEAVE NOW IF YOU VALUE YOUR LIFE!
Get An Email Alert Each Time MSDESERTRODENT Posts