Thursday, October 30, 2008
First, for those reading my blogs...it is he...Stepson. My stepdaughter...knock on wood, seems to be on the upside. It was my step son before, and step son again. I contacted the school and did find out that there is no school today or tomorrow. I filled them all in with what is going on as well as sending email last night. Later, we will need to file a runaway report, but for right now, they are going to try to locate him (AFJROTC) and see if they can get him to move into the right direction. It came to them very much as a shock just as it has us. In fact, for the way he has portrayed himself to them, and to us, no one would have anticipated this coming. Anyways, I will be going to SD's conference while hubby stays home in case son shows up. We felt it best for us both to not be gone and definitely don't want to have the house broke into.
Aside from that, I have been really busy with work. I am choosing to be happy (difficult to do), choosing to take care of me (also hard to do with all that is happening), drink my water. I have managed to track my food and water still. This has been the positive. Out of curiosity, I decided to weigh myself...thankfully, no gain, but of course no loss. I haven't gone over calories so I didn't think I gained, but I no stress does weird things to your body.
Another note on the positive side, I got 10 pairs of bras which are like new or almost new. My sister has gained soooo much weight, they didn't fit her and so she brought over and gave to me. I was in so much shock seeing her. Hope my face didn't show the shock, but wow, has she gained. Oh so sad. I figured she had been gaining, and she does go walking every day Mon-Fri, but she isn't careful with her food planning. Seems she just won't start, or has some excuse, and doesn't want to do Sparks. She was like 125 and is now about 230-250. She has been gaining 1-3 pounds a week. This is partially due to her medications, but the doctors tell her she really needs to be careful with her eating and try to get the weight off. I can't say much to nothing too her, but I try to encourage her in a positive way. I love the bras she gave me...they are like really good quality expensive bras. Not that mine were real cheap, but these are like really really nice and I like them. If I was 20 pounds heavier, I would not fit them...so the plus is that I am able to wear and will be able too, even if I lose 60 more pounds. At that point, I may have to go smaller or put on last notches.
Another positive...with work...I still have my job...I received email from new mgmt, that the info I did provide was correct, as what they were trying to do can't be done, at least in the way they were thinking. I provided info, to the correct way to have it done. They were pleased with what I had done. Better to have things setup correctly then incorrectly and have a real mess.
Another positive: I was able to make my mortgage payment today. However, now it is Due for November, but I have until the 15th to make it on time, or if after that, it will have a late charge, but at least I've made it...so I know I have a home for another month...not be forced into the 3 months and having to go into foreclosure.
I called Dishnetwork, and was able to reduce down, so shaved a little off of their. Really trying to find ways to cut back on the bills. Pretty hard to do. I will keep working on it.
Another positive: I have maintained and not gained, and still sparking, and still sticking with it.
OK - time to go....Will try to get on later.
Wednesday, October 29, 2008
If you read my down in the dumps you know what I am talking about. I just don't understand how you can work with someone to help them succeed, give them money to go to fright fest, go to their school functions, let them do their after school activities, reduce them to just two easy chores, they do pretty well academically, really doing well in school, to just start stealing from you, not do their two simple chores, talk back, want to argue. When confront him after school, he just walked out the front door and is gone (runaway) with none of his stuff. Well, what can I do...why want to do so much and then decide to steal and act as if you don't care. He thinks we have no right to go through his room, but we did because stuff was missing. Well, guess where we found...yep...his room and bathroom....so pretty obvious as to why he did not want us to go through his room. I am just so angry.
We even waited on confronting him about the money but when everything else came up missing, I was positive...and the fact he walked out the way he did, and the I don't care attitude.
Wednesday, October 29, 2008
I am so down in the dumps. I can't even think straight. I just discoved that SD just stole some of my coin collection, lighter collection, my jewelry and stole cash from my purse. I suspected the cash when it came up missing, but rode it off, but after discovering everything else, now I know for sure he stole from my purse. I am so sick of my SD. I am beginning to build a lot of hate inside which I don't like. It is like I am stuck. Police won't do anything because it is home that he steals from. I am so close to the point of hanging the towel up for everything, walking and never looking back. All of this has just really added to everything with jobs going away and just being so close to being homeless scares me. I finally have enough to make my mortgage payment, but it is due again in 3 days, so I need to work on coming up with that payment. It is like I am stuck stuck stuck. I just don't see or feel anything happy or good right now. I am trying to figure out what to choose, how to choose to be happy. It is really hard to choose to be happy when things are stolen from you including my promise ring and my previous wedding ring.
Wednesday, October 29, 2008
Yesterday was just an ok day. I barely got my water in, but I did. Did ok with my eating. TOM came to visit my SD early and I am having all the symptoms of TOM coming to visit me which would explain my weird mood. I've really been struggling with keeping an upbeat mood. I think it is a combination of things. I found out, yesterday, another person was let go and a couple of others. It is all pretty scary. I suspect some others going soon too so this stresses me, our finances, etc. Just so scary. The kids think money should just appear. But it doesn't. Don't want to do their chores, but want priveleges, but I say no way. You can't do your part, why should we do our part and give you a privilege.
Monday, October 27, 2008
I have to say, sometimes it is so hard to get to my numbers. I planned a nice dinner. Needless to say, I measured everything, but I didn't finish it all. I left it as is on my tracker, but just can't put anymore into my tummy. I did 19-20 min mile today. My husband had me moving a good clip on the boardwalk.
Got my water in too.
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