Tuesday, September 25, 2007
I gave in and ate one of those big old chocolate bars that K. is selling for school. Damn, it was good. It's on my food tracker for yesterday, all 330 calories of it. Wish I could have only eaten half of it, but I think my chocolate itch is scratched satisfactorily now for awhile and I can resist the rest of evil things still in the house.
And I was still in calorie range for yesterday, so its all good.
I did something to my back. Crunches really hurt. In fact, they really aren't happening at all right now with the hands behind the head. I must be doing them wrong because every time I get on a spurt of doing 50 crunches a day I have this problem. I can do about a week's worth before I get this lower back pain and that takes about a week to go away. So I think I'll need to take a crunch break to heal up a bit.
The only other thing I'm noticing lately is that we can no longer eat a loaf of bread before it gets moldy. I've thrown away the last two loaves. It really makes a difference on my carb intake and calorie count if I can resist bread at lunch time. I've been eating pita bread or whole wheat crackers instead of two slices of bread. I don't get any hungrier and I'm much more likely to stay in my calorie range for the day.
Friday, September 21, 2007
This is one of those weeks when I had no idea what to expect when I stepped on the scale. I am pleased to report I was up only .4, so I'm thinking that is basically staying the same. Phew!
Last week, I was fine with being hungry. This week it has been a struggle to just eat what I had planned and no more. I've got to remember to trust my body that I *will* feel fuller in a few minutes. I've got to remember not to stuff my face until I'm miserable. I've got to remember to curb the mindless snacking. Use my mind, not my appetite!
I bought a pair of dress pants in a smaller size last weekend. Haven't had the courage to wear them yet as they are still a little tight, but I should try them on again to remind myself that yes, I CAN wear them. I had on my smaller shorts yesterday and they fit GREAT. Saw an old co-worker yesterday who hadn't seen me in several months and she was very complimentary.
Now if I could just get a man to notice me. I thought there might have been a possibility with someone, but when he found out I had kids he turned visibly pale and I haven't even seen him since. I think, too, that when he found out how old the kids were he figured out I was significantly older than he was. I already suspected that, but, ahem, its not a problem in MY mind ;-)
Friday, September 14, 2007
What do they have in common? They are both flucuating WILDLY!
Three Fridays ago I weighted 182.6. This is after months of bouncing around 188. I was basically at 188 all summer.
Two Fridays ago I weighed 185.8. Figured the week before was a fluke because it was such a dramatic loss. 185 is not 188 so I was still fine with it.
One Friday ago I weighed 187. This was after a Labor Day Weekend vacation that involved much eating out, so it was not totally unexpected to gain that weight. It was just over a pound--could have been worse. But it was a call to action.
Today, I weighed 182.2--a new low. I overate this past weekend when we had company, but I've been eating very well for the past several days and I've been below my minimum calorie intake each of those days and in the range on Monday. It's been fairly easy this week. I've been busy so I don't really have time to think about it, but when I do think about it I acknowledge it, remind myself I will be eating (usually in just a couple of hours) and then I can forget about it for a while. This is a key lesson for me, internalized from Beck's Diet Solution.
Now if I can maintain a fairly steady loss each week I can be at my goal by the end of October, but its almost too scary to plan that far ahead. Just take it one day at a time!
Thursday, September 13, 2007
I've had two really excellent days in terms of calorie intake. Both days have been below my minimum calorie range AND I'm getting used to feeling hungry. I'm not always dealing with that graciously, but I'm functioning with it.
Last night I had commitments at church that kept me there until 7:00 p.m. I did have supper planned and came home and cooked it and ate around 7:40, but I was nearly shaky I was so hungry. And crabby?! My kids still have their heads attached, barely! They were tip-toeing around me and kept apologizing for everything and that's when I realized how surly I was! It was better after I finally ate.
But all told, even with a popsicle-fruit bar treat after supper I was still under 1200 calories yesterday. If I can avoid lots of carbohydrates at lunch time I can do well in the calorie department. Time to stock up on pita bread and tortillas for sandwiches, I guess.
Wednesday, September 12, 2007
I finally figured out how to track additional nutrients in my food journal. I decided to just add a couple more for now--calcium and fiber. I have some compelling immediate issues that make me interested in fiber content. Ahem, 'nuff said. Osteoporosis is an issue in my family, so I decided to track the calcium because of that.
Guess what? I'm usually below the minimum on both of these. On my very best days I might reach the minimum threshold--we are talking once a week at best. OK, something else to work on.
I had an incredible day eating-wise yesterday. I was below my minimum calorie threshold and up until dinner time had ingested less than 500 calories. I was hungry, but not dying or obsessed with it. What a different experience--to be hungry and to be aware of it, yet not *panicked* about it.
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