MORETHANWEIGHT's Recent Blog Entries

We rescued a peacock ;0)

Wednesday, May 12, 2010

So what did you do last night?
Me well went to a Jr. High School Piano Recital, had chinese food, watched BL and oh yeah...rescued a peacock.
We really don't live in the country however some of the back roads are quite rural and we were on one such road last night. Long story about a prom gown that needs hemming by Saturday...won't bore you. Right after Meg's Recital Em and I head to Magnolia Springs to get her dress. The road we take is a favorite as there's one beautiful ranch that I love driving by. There's not a lot of traffic on this road but enough. As we come around a bend I see something not 4 feet from the road and swear it is a peacock. Em thinks I'm nuts it is 8pm sun's setting no I turn around to prove to her I am not crazy and lo and behold it is a peacock near the side of the road just walking around. We decide to pull into the nearest driveway to find out who the owner is so we can get this bird home. As we drive up this long dirt road we are greeted by a chorus of squawks there are peacocks literally walking everywhere...we now realize this is a peacock farm/ranch. Who knew! I knocked on the door but no one was home. As we are turning around in the drive we notice that peacocks are sitting atop of a fence post so I want to take a pic, having just come from the recital I have my camera. Em tries taking it from the car but it is dusk and so not great results. I have her get out and she's freaking now that we're trespassing but takes the pictures. All awhile I am losing it over these beautiful hens just walking around. By now the bird from the road has wandered back up the drive and hops atop a fence post then down into the pasture

Ok so maybe we didn't really "rescue" the peacock, we like to believe we made it come back home, but what a great story huh

so what did you do last night lol emoticon

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SING4MYFOOD 10/1/2010 1:45AM

    OMGosh! I came on your Page to wish you happy birthday, & HAD to read about the peacock. What a beautiful specimen! I don't think I've ever seen one before with a tail that long!

I live in Miami right now (came here for 3-6 months & been here almost a year). This definitely NOT a rural area! But there are at least 2 peacocks that wander around in the street (a very busy one, especially during rush hour), & across the street into our condo parking lot. What a treat to see them, but I hope I never see one squashed on the road!

Happy birthday, by the way.

In Him,


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DIETSAFARI 5/13/2010 12:26AM

    Loved your peacock. Em will always remember your adventure.
I did not do anything as exciting as you though..

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MEYLOSE 5/12/2010 10:00PM

    Beautiful peacock. Last night watched Bigest Loser, only a few weeks left of this season.

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TML-2012 5/12/2010 8:06PM

    The peacock is beautiful!!

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CRIS76 5/12/2010 11:33AM

    HA! Great picture!

Last night.. uh, I didn't rescue a peacock LOL

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LIFE-OF-LEISURE 5/12/2010 10:25AM

    You will never forget that night! This is a story that will get repeated through the years! emoticon

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GOCELTICSGO 5/12/2010 10:15AM


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I want the Confetti

Wednesday, May 05, 2010

I know it has been a while since I've blogged. I don't know why there just seemed to be too much to deal with even here with you. In the almost 2 weeks since I've blogged there have been some great highs and some sucky lows.
I am always a bad new first person as I like to leave on a high note....
~Son's ODD is really getting rough these days and husband's lack of support and consistency doesn't help much
~Confronted husband about Love YOU text to girl at time had by none
~had to put our dog of 12 years down (truly the worst of all)
~eating has been my great way to handle most of this ~definitely not proud
emoticon~Em was chosen to sing first at Senior Vocal Recital~big deal to be first or last
emoticon~Meg won NJHS Historian by default as the girl didn't want to run against her AND two of her films won first and second in County Media Festival
emoticon~Em was awarded scholarship for her commitment to outreach youth ministry YEAH
emoticon~Garden is almost all in and looking great

Onto confetti
While I was reading Chris76 blog about biggest loser's show last night it sparked a thought in me. Imagine if we all had a team of people whose sole purpose was to show up every month or so and just celebrate the changes in our lives. For those of you who don't watch BL last night's show was the make-over where each contestant gets head to toe makeover and family members get to see the results.
this was something that two of the players were talking about as motivation. Being the person to stand at the end with the largest weight loss while confetti floats down all over you. I mean think about it have you ever had anything like that. do you know anyone who has experienced that?????????
Maybe I am feeling a little bit defeated and i'll own to that. While at Meg's award ceremony we saw her teacher from last year whom i haven't seen since Sept and I'll be honest i was expecting a comment on my 30+ weight didn't come. How self centered was I here the night was about the kids and celebrating their success and I was thinking of me.
I guess maybe because it is just that time fo seems every weekend there is some celebration occurring. As a parent it truly energizes you when you see your kids thrive with their successes. I guess that's where ww groups excel as they do celebrate your weight loss along with you announcing your achievements to a group and you get to feel that applause.
Where am I going with this....I don't know sounded better in my head earlier....sorry had to run and pull the sheets off the line as it started re-reading this I'm trying to get to where I thought this was going...
So how bad do you want the confetti??? Are you willing to sacrifice 4 months away from family and friends. Are you willing to let the world watch you sweat, cry and even puke? Are you willing to face the public scrutiny over every action and comment you make? Most of us aren't which is why we aren't on BL however we all want the confetti at the end.
So how am I going to get my confetti?? I don't know right now and that is honest. I could post eating and exercising plans but that does not ensure anything. I could buy all the cool dvds and equipment but money spent doesn't equal a changed body.
So where am I? I know i totally tanked these last 2 weeks and the fact I lost weight really didn't help. WHAT you're really if I behaved badly why should I be rewarded with a weight loss what good is that?? I feel like there's this bill out there that is coming due and oh man it aint gonna be pretty.
Do I still want confetti? I would love to have a celebration of my lifestyle change....the health that I've achieved...the self-worth realization that comes with both of those....Yes I do want the confetti.
I just need to realize that this commitment is a full time requirement not something I can pick up and put down whenever I feel like it

So no confetti for now.....that's ok I don't need that mess in my house anyway emoticon

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MARIEFIYA 5/10/2010 10:36PM

    Kudos to you for getting through the past two weeks. You have had had a lot going on in your life. Keep going strong.

emoticon emoticon emoticon

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TML-2012 5/10/2010 9:53AM

    Hi, I am sorry to here about the last two weeks... That is really tough. Right now I am not a good one to give advice. I seem to be stuck in a holding pattern. I am so crazy busy that life seems to be a blur. I know what you mean about logging, fancy equipment, etc. I don't think there is a magic something that will make the weight come off. I have just been holding my own ... one step at a time. Right now I am traveling with work and all the food, munchies, etc are essentially open access and this combined with stress .... is a bad combo. Last week where I was at we had a stocked fridge with all sorts of soda and munchies, they brought in food, and we ate out. So far on the trips (after the first one where I went sort of food crazy) I am back to my original spark starting weight and am on the verge of losing a pound. This is not the 10 pound loss a month I wanted. So what I am doing is taking it one small step at a time. When ever eat I plan that food moment to be healthy and in my overall calorie total. Then each day I move for 30 min at least doing something. We can do this and yes I would love the confetti too. I would settle for being the person on biggest loser that stands next to the person with the confetti but is healthy and strong.

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DOCLOVER 5/6/2010 11:21AM

    You are a tough woman to go through all of that crap in the past 2 weeks! I am so, SO sorry. Ugh. The hard thing about this weightloss journey is that life continues to play out around us but we have to try and avoid turning to food for comfort even when bad things happen. That is quite a challenege!!!

BTW, I love Biggest Loser and I want the confetti, too! hehe

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DIETSAFARI 5/6/2010 1:23AM

    I am celebrating you and your new lifestyle, and your weightloss today. I am dedicating my short run (always the most fun) to you. It is a run of celebration, an I will put a skip in there every so often.
Grace is when we get what we don't deserve- there is no sword over your head added to that. You are just being carried..
Bless you today

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Setting up for failure?

Friday, April 23, 2010

Buy one get one and could I resist. My kids love mini donuts and what mom doesn't want to get their kids what they want
I have my stock of snacks in the house. they actually take up a small cabinet. I was prepared. I could do this
I am an emotional and binge eater (thanks Raven2feathers for your blog on this) and with all going on in my life bringing those donuts in.....not the smartest move I've made.
I did can recognize that this is something I am going to have to confront and overcome but you know what today isn't that day and that's okay
I think it is important to recognize what we can and cannot do. Of course we all have strength to overcome things we think we can't. I also believe that knowing limits are important. With that being said there are times in our lives when it is best to not try to conquer everything at once. For me this is one of those times.

So I have learned that I can't have donuts in the house until I am able to handle them or at least have something that I believe is a great substitution.

thank goodness i only bought the two bags and have been offering them to the kids hoping to finish them quickly

So I am going to continue to set myself up for success and simply accept not every battle will be won at first but will be eventually

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MARIEFIYA 4/28/2010 9:41PM

    emoticon job on realizing what works best for you! I am the same way with chocolate and Doritos. Out of sight, out of mind.....

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TONYA_DIMPLES 4/27/2010 3:46PM

    I know how you feel , too. It is so hard for me to have sweets in my house , cuz soon as things go " bad' , I go for the most fattening thing. It is great that you shared your experience , and I applaud you for that. emoticon

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1REDBEAUTIFUL 4/26/2010 2:43PM

    I know exactly how you feel. I would buy my sons things for his lunch and tell myself that is for his lunch it helped psych myself out.Whew!! Good luck! You can do it.

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LORREE63 4/24/2010 1:02PM

    I know exactly where you are.

I have a cupboard that is on the other side of the kitchen away from the pantry. That is where I keep the cookies and such. I am not a cookie eater (unless homemade) but it still needs to be out of the way. Chips are another story. I buy the 1 ounce bags for their lunches but they have to be hidden behind the buffet in the dining room. I know they are there - but I am an out-of-sight out-of mind kind of eater for certain things.

But doughnuts, muffins, mixed nuts, chocolate bars and anything extra good and calorie laden - forget it. Oh, and red licorice....can't be in the house or it just sings to me.

So I don't buy THOSE things.

The funny thing kids have not asked where "those" treats are. It must be a gene they inherited from their father.
It kind of makes me nuts!

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FRANRN76 4/24/2010 12:50PM

    I cannot have sweets in the house either. WEll I do have small york peppermint patties, but they are in the freezer in the basement. I normally onlly keep 10 up in the top fridge for the week. If I want more then I have to walk down the stairs to the basement. Most of the time I am too lazy to do that.

Just a thought. Have you ever tried the FiberOne bars? I get the chocolate ones. They are awesome. Taste like I am eating a candy bar. Has 9 grams of fiber, so it feels you up a bit.

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FITNHAPPYNOW 4/24/2010 11:12AM

    I can't have treats in my house either. I don't have young children around anymore either though so it's easier for me to keep the house temptation free. Great job recognizing what you need to do for you to be successful. Good luck!! emoticon

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MARYBERT 4/23/2010 11:51PM

    Second blog I replied on tonight concerning donuts, they must be flying in the air.
All you have to do is accept those donuts are a trigger and not bring them in the house. I tried buying cookies on Monday boy what a mistake that was. I was hung over on Tuesday. Sugar is so much like a drug. The more we eat the more we want a fix of it. Never be guilty your not bringing in treats for your kids. Staying healthy really does mean rethinking what our concept of treats really is doesn't it? Buy more fruit. Get out and play with them, your kids I They will be happy and healthy. God bless you on your journey.

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MONTANA_ED 4/23/2010 11:48PM

    Wow - good for you! Temptation is going to be everywhere, but when you are living a helthy lifestyle, then alternatives seem to pop up just as easily.

LOL - I can just imagine you setting out the donuts in a bowl on the table and just walking away. Kids have a way of making that stuff disappear in a hurry!



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JULIE_1978 4/23/2010 11:47PM

    I totally hear what you are saying!! I had my own moment in the grocery store today because they had reduced perfectly good cupcakes because the cake decorator had used the wrong colour icing on the cupcake - 6 cupcakes for $1 (they had quite a few packages to get rid of..) The old me probably would have bought 2 packages home to share with my "family" - literally one package for me and one for them! And I would probably have thought I could eat the cupcakes over the space of a few days but I know I would have eaten them all by tomorrow because I am middle of the night binger. But I'm determined that change that by one little victory at a time! Keep up the great work and everytime you have an AH HA moment as they call them, take the time to learn the lesson! That's what I keep telling myself!!


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London here we come

Tuesday, April 20, 2010

Yesterday's post was about the mess in my life,,,,,while it is still there it is not going to suck the life out of well my life.

London.....went there as a teenager and have always always wanted to return. I proudly tell everyone that I am second generation american as my grandfather (what we had to call him) was born in England in the 1880's and came to america but through Canada. You see just in case us/england went to war again LOL he couldn't become a citizen

so last week we learned that our settlement from a car accident was going to be a little bit more than expected. Now I could do something responsible like a screen porch or a car for the teenage drivers or even put in towards my mtg. However I know without doubt that I will never be in this financial situation ever again. I will never be able to take my children on a trip like this EVER. Never mind with oldest off to college and others not far behind when will we truly have the time like this??? Ok a bit dramatic but with summer jobs. mission trips and such even arranging this was not the easiest and they all still live at home!

So now the planning begins. We don't have passports so have to rush on those,
Trying to figure out where to stay exactly what to do when is proving a bit overwhelming.
We know the basics of what we want to do but this isn't like planning a trip to NYC and you have lots of people to ask for resources.
The conversion rate isn't helping much either...ouch $1 equals .655 GBP
then i get confused about the euro thing too
Hotels are so expensive and they charge per person per night even for the kids

But we are excited we are going to leave 2 days after graduation YEAH\
Then life sneaks back in....I do not want husband to go. Thinking that he should use that time and move out. But of course that is going to be a hurdle to cross. What will kids think? The flip side is if we go and tensions are high do we really want to be fighting the whole time?
Of course he would never go with the kids let's do what's best for them.. But again he doesn't know I know about HER and his Love you text.

Ok honest part...did have a few pieces of cheese last night thinking about him and this situation.
I have moved out of the bed but as we don't have an extra bedroom means I am sleeping on our couch. I've set my alarm to wake after he leaves so I am in bed before the kids come out in the morning. But crap forgot to remake the couch before I went in wonder if they were coherent enough to notice before their ride got here at 7 (like most teenagers they get up 15 minutes before they have to leave)
Sorry interrupted by phone call.....I guess I need to expect to hear friends ask you won't take him back maybe he's turned to someone else b/c he missed you~~~~~~ok not going to run to the blueberry cake inside....I hope

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MOTIV8U 5/5/2010 1:20PM

    I stayed at the Girl Scout House... it was much cheaper than the hotels in London. We even had a couple come by to stay when their heat ran out at the MARRIOTT. google it and see if it a) still exists b) is cheaper c) would work for you and your family. We were served dinner every night, which made it much easier because then we only had to fend for ourselves at lunch (God bless my Mom, I was a picky 12 year old and so we ate a lot of KFC and McDonalds). As far as who goes on the trip, wonder if you could just say this something i really want to do for the kids, instead of making it about him moving out.. maybe he will come to that realization between now and then, without you having to suggest it. Just a thought.

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TIKITAMI 4/23/2010 10:38AM


Go on the trip!!

My two cents is just before booking the tickets you should let him know what you know and give him the option to stay home and sort things out. Would he really want to come with you and the kids?

You will have so much fun and a lifetime of memories by doing this.

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WXNESS 4/21/2010 10:39AM

    I would totally take the trip too! Like you said, once in a lifetime experience! While I've never been to London, I have been to Europe and it is amazing! I believe if you stay only in England you don't have to worry about Euros at all...only if you go outside of the country. Even then it's not too confusing, just keep some money aside to change to Euros instead of going from dollars to GBP to Euros. As for passport holders - I definitely recommend getting the waist belt ones - I've had a neck one and by the end of the trip I'm figuring out how to wear it around my waist or completely given up on wearing it (not the best thing to do).

Yeah you ate a little bit of cheese but the key words are "little bit". It sounds like you controlled what you ate - focus on that.

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CHARLIE215 4/20/2010 8:04PM

    You should get a guidebook and decide what you want to do. London is expensive but not much more than NYC. The exchange rate has actually improved if you have US$. I'm happy to offer some suggestions if you want. I lived in London up until 3 yrs ago.

Another thing, you can get a train to Paris & could actually go there for the day if you wanted to. :)

For accomodation, it might be worth renting an apartment rather than hotel rooms.

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TINKMCD 4/20/2010 12:33PM

    What a terrific attitude: "it's not going to suck the life out of"!

I'm behind you all the way in your decision to "seize the day" and spend some of the accident settlement on the trip of a lifetime. It could be hugely memorable for your kids--and you're quite right about possibly never having the time again, with your oldest off to college. Go for it!

One question about the issue of whether or not your husband comes along: any chance you can use some of the settlement to consult a divorce lawyer? Or alternatively (since if I understand correctly, neither of you is working at the moment), get some advice from a legal clinic?

Me, I'm a great believer in empowering myself with as much information as possible. Here (in Toronto, Canada), even government Web sites contain tons of plain-English explanations of our laws regarding separation and divorce.

So I'm hoping that besides the support you'll get here, you can also access some specific support locally so that you know your rights. In my experience, many women think that they have far fewer rights in such situations than they actually do.


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I'm not eating

Monday, April 19, 2010


  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

FILLANGES 4/22/2010 9:38PM

    While it is true that God does not like divorce, He tells us in His own Word that if a spouse is unfaithful, you may end the marriage. I got a tone of confidence from reading this. You are confident your marriage is over, and I am confident God will give you the strength and guidance you need to move on. All you need to do is ask Him and allow Him to work in your life. I pray God's Blessing upon you and your children and your soon to be ex-husband. I know you will get through this. Take care and God Bless. Rick emoticon emoticon emoticon

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MARIEFIYA 4/22/2010 9:13PM

    I truly admire your courage and strength. Just put it into God's hands, and he will carry you through this tough time. I am proud of you for taking care of yourself and doing what is best for YOU. I am happy that you are able to realize that eating will not solve anything. I am sending you hugs.
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1REDBEAUTIFUL 4/21/2010 11:33PM

    I think it is great that you have a plan. I also think it is great that you are letting yourself feel the pain, so many of us stuff it down and then it comes up at completely inappropriate times. Remember YOU are important and children are resilient more than people think. I am talking from experience been on both sides. Good luck on your fork in the road. May it lead you to health and happiness you deserve. Congrats on weight loss.

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MISHKALA 4/21/2010 9:11PM

    Take care of yourself my friend. It's clear from your blog that God has given you the strength and confidence to handle this with a level head, and your children are the angels that will carry you through this tough time. We're here if you need support. God bless. emoticon emoticon ~Mish~

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WXNESS 4/21/2010 10:28AM

    Your confidence and calmness come through so much in this post - congrats on that! I love your line at the end about cheating and not eating :) *hugs* to you and know that your sparkfamily is supporting you and anything that makes you happy!

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DAKOTASMOMMY_07 4/21/2010 9:45AM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

Oh my friend..This is all a lot to take in.
The fact that you didn't BLOW up!! Is a sure sign you knew already..Also you feeling STRONG..And CONFIDENT is a gift from GOD.

Look I know divorce is frowned upon..And in God's eyes its "Death til you part"..
BUT clearly you are not happy..Not only that..Your husband does NOT deserve you!!

Yes the kids will be upset..BUT later will realize how strong their Mother is,and that YOU would do anything for them.
YOU deserve to be happy.And in the future a good Man will come along.

Don't let what others think or say get to you..YOU must do what is right for YOU,and your Children.
In your heart you know what is right..That is another gift from God.
I wish you nothing but the best.
God Bless my friend~Christina

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MOTIV8U 4/21/2010 2:35AM

    I'm sending you a hug.. you are so strong... what you wrote at the end shows the power you have. I don't have much to say in words, but I hope I join the voices of many who will support you. I have a good friend whose divorce was not supported by people in her church, and it saddened me greatly. Remember that others judgment is not about you.. its usually about them. Take care of yourself, and love those kids.. they will be okay..I'm hoping they also surprise you with their strength.

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TINKMCD 4/20/2010 12:14PM

    Coming to a realization like this one is never easy--and the text message that served as the last straw, even if it wasn't a complete surprise, can't have been much fun to discover.

I'm so glad that you're feeling calm and confident, and that you're taking the time you need to make a plan that will work to get you out of this situation.

Sorry that your Bible Study group was less than supportive. Be aware, though, that sometimes people are threatened by seeing someone else make a positive move because they themselves are putting up with an awful situation, but haven't (yet) had the courage to remove themselves from it. Please don't let *their* issues dilute *your* resolve.

I myself am a "child of divorce"--and given that my father was an alcoholic, a womanizer, a compulsive gambler, and a pathological liar, I have always felt that my mother did both herself and me a *huge* favour in getting us away from him. She did her best to make sure that I had positive male figures in my life (uncles, family friends, and so on), and as a result, I grew up with I suspect is a much healthier attitude toward men and relationships than I would have had if she'd stayed with my dad.

My own divorce was, while mutually decided upon and extremely amicable (we're still friends, 10 years later--we just make better friends than we did husband and wife), still sad and painful.

You're bound to feel quite a rollercoaster of emotions as you go through this process. May you continue to know in your heart of hearts that this experience represents only one door closing--and it'll almost certainly result in others opening onto spectacular vistas for you.

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KATHYBFIT 4/19/2010 4:38PM

    Wow really have it together! Stay with your plan cause it is a perfect one! Good for you! You know when you've made the right decision by how it makes you feel, and it sounds like you are feeling that way now!
You and the kids will be fine with a new beginning.
And hey, Congrats on the weight loss! You are already on your way down the road to a happier you!

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TIKITAMI 4/19/2010 4:12PM


It's amazing how when the end really comes you can be so calm.
I remember when my first marriage ended. I was standing looking out my kitchen window when I noticed the horse behind us was not moving. My only thought, horse is dead. Well that's it, the marriage is over. All the while standing calmly drinking my coffee.

My kids still joke about how I decided it was finally over. Like you it the marriage is over for a long time. I think it's like this for many people and it isn't a spur of the moment decision. We finally get to the point where you feel good about moving on and are ready to accept. Ending a marriage takes a long time, we talk about it, throw temper tantrums, decide to try again, hear from our friends and family thoughts on why is it taking us to long to move on. But at the end of the day we are the ones that have to live with our decision and we need to be at that place in our minds that we can handle it.

I think you handled everything great. Your kids will understand that this is the best for everyone. Maybe not right away, but very soon.

I wish I could give you a hug for being so amazing and strong.

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ORGOLDENDUCK 4/19/2010 3:03PM


That was a LOT to swallow! Your email really gives me the sense that you are indeed calm!! Kudos to you!!!!

I honestly can't imagine my reaction...but I know it wouldn't be as civil as yours!

You should really be proud of yourself and self-control!!!

Congrats on the weight loss!


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