Holiday Eating tips (Funny)

Friday, December 28, 2012

Holiday eating tips
1. Avoid carrot sticks. Anyone who puts carrots on a holiday buffet table knows nothing of the Holiday spirit. In fact, if you see carrots, leave immediately. Go next door, where they're serving rum balls.

2. Drink as much eggnog as you can. And quickly. It's rare... You cannot find it any other time of year but now. So drink up! Who cares that it has 10,000 calories in every sip? It's not as if you're going to turn into an eggnog-alcoholic or something. It's a treat. Enjoy it. Have one for me. Have two. It's later than you think. It's Christmas!

3. If something comes with gravy, use it. That's the whole point of gravy. Gravy does not stand alone. Pour it on. Make a volcano out of your mashed potatoes. Fill it with gravy. Eat the volcano. Repeat.

4. As for mashed potatoes, always ask if they're made with skim milk or whole milk. If it's skim, pass. Why bother? It's like buying a sports car with an automatic transmission.

5. Do not have a snack before going to a party in an effort to control your eating. The whole point of going to a Holiday party is to eat other people's food for free. Lots of it. Hello?

6. Under no circumstances should you exercise between now and New Year's. You can do that in January when you have nothing else to do. This is the time for long naps, which you'll need after circling the buffet table while carrying a 10-pound plate of food and that vat of eggnog.

7. If you come across something really good at a buffet table, like frosted Christmas cookies in the shape and size of Santa, position yourself near them and don't budge. Have as many as you can before becoming the center of attention. They're like a beautiful pair of shoes. If you leave them behind, you're never going to see them again.

8. Same for pies. Apple, Pumpkin,Mincemeat. Have a slice of each. Or if you don't like mincemeat, have two apples and one pumpkin. Always have three. When else do you get to have more than one dessert? Labor Day?

9. Did someone mention fruitcake? Granted, it's loaded with the mandatory celebratory calories, but avoid it at all cost. I mean, have some standards.

10. One final tip: If you don't feel terrible when you leave the party or get up from the table, you haven't been paying attention. Re-read tips; start over, but hurry, January is just around the corner. Remember this motto to live by:

"Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, chocolate in one hand and wine in the other, body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming "WOO HOO what a ride!"

Have a great holiday season!!


Thanks to one of my fishing buddies who wrote this I had to share. I thought it was funny so please don't take this seriously. I will not let this way of thinking ruin my journey.

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What a great feeling!

Friday, February 10, 2012

Oh wow! finished 7 days of boxing and I feel great. I am really liking this so much. My workout buddy has been MIA from boxing for a couple of days but I realized since I missed a day because she wasn't coming I felt really bad. I had to get my butt in gear and just go alone. I have to do this with or without her. So I have lost 6 lbs since I started. She was amazed when I told her this and she said "so it's really working" what did she think. I don't know, so hopefully she will be back with me on Monday.

Have a great weekend my sparkling friends and keep sparking and doing your thing.

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Boxing Class Round 4 : (

Tuesday, January 31, 2012

Had a great time on Friday with the girls. Had to test out my skills on my guy friend because he kept messing with my ponytail. I kept telling him to stop but he kept doing it and laughing at the same time. You know how we are about our hair. So I gave him a right punch to the chest and he fell in a chair through the back door. OMG! I didn't know I could do that. but he asked for it. LOL!

Yesterday was my day to go to my class and I ended up NOT going because I sat there waiting for my buddy who did not call me to tell me she had to go home. UUrgh! I texted her and finally she called me and said she had an emergency at home. By that time I was going to be late for the class. I probably could have still went but I didn't go because I didn't have a pass yet to get in so I thought they wouldn't have let me in. I should have tried anyway. So I ended up kicking myself all the way home.

Today I will make sure I get my pass and if this happens again I will go alone.

Hope your making it happen today. Have a great week my sparkling friends.

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Knock out!! Time to celebrate

Friday, January 27, 2012

Yesterday was my rest day. It's funny how I feel guilty for not going to boxing class. My body is aching and I need this break. I hope this break doesn't move me backwards and I start getting lazy. I'm also resting today its friday and I need a girls night out with my workout buddy and celebrate our 3 day success. I have planned a workout weekend of popping in my Biggest loser DVD on Saturday and Leslie Sanone walking DVD on Sunday. I have posted on the wall beside my bed to make sure I see it as soon as I get up. I pray that the lord gets me through this. Have a great weekend my sparkling friends.

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Boxing Class Round 3 Ding! Ding!

Thursday, January 26, 2012

Yesterday was my third day. WOW! I made it through. I know I shouldn't feel this way but I feel like quiting every time. We did some boxing techniques that I really like but I am the type of person that if I don't do it right I get mad at myself. I have to just know that I am a beginner and in time I will get better. He made us do every ab exercise there is. At one point I just laid there and wanted to just go to sleep and meany came over and looked down at me like what are you doing I said I CAN'T! (never have I ever meant saying these words right then) he said you can and you will. Right there gave me the confidence that I needed. THANK YOU MEANY! Boy everytime I laugh my muscles hurt.

Today and Friday are my rest days but I will be getting a workout in on Saturday on my own.


Calories burned: 717

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