MONAKIN314   100,292
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What a rough week can teach you

Friday, January 29, 2010

Itís been a rough week. Monday morning I woke up an hour late cause of a power outage. Tuesday I got stuck in a line at lunch time making that last over my hour. Thursday I woke up to unpredicted snow making my commute a nightmare. Then Thursday afternoon I got my annual review at work which really upset me. Now it is Friday and everything seems to be going okay. Through all of this I have been able to keep in my calorie range all week and I even decide to get my nose out of my books last night to do some Wii boxing (okay a little boxing, after a half hour DH came to see if I was going to make dinner).

So while itís been a stress filled week, I think I have been handling it, with a little help from my friends. It really help to keep my on track. This week has really showed me that I can do this. I didnít give in to the temptations and even motivated myself to do more than I had been doing. It also made me realize that SP isnít just about losing weight, being here is just so much more. I knew that, but I guess sometimes you just need a rough week to remind you of these things.

So I want to send out I big Thank You everyone!!!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SMYLEERED 1/31/2010 12:46AM

    It's so good to read you've been able to get through this stressful week, and still stayed on track. That's emoticon!

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Time to stop looking back and start moving forward...

Monday, January 11, 2010

Itís been awhile since I have updated my blog, with a new year itís time for me to get myself back to sparking. 2009 was a good year and a bad year. I lost 35 pounds and finally got pregnant, but my pregnancy ended in a miscarriage at 11 weeks. My mother was very ill and other family members health became an issue. All of that sent me into a downward spiral mentally. Than combined with the holidays got me gaining back some of the weight that I lost.

Now it is time to put all that behind me and get moving forward. I have my nephewís wedding in May and since I will be the oldest bridesmaid and donít want to be the biggest one too. So as of now I am recommitting myself to spark. I am going to track what I eat everyday and everything. I am going to exercise regularly even when I donít feel like it. I am going to be a smaller healthier me. I know I have said it before, but it is time to stop talking and start walking. I have done it before and I can do it again! But I am going to need help.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MOMFAN 1/16/2010 6:42AM

    A wedding last year was a huge motivation for me. You can do it!

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DBELLE39 1/12/2010 8:28PM

    I am so sorry for all that you went thru in 2009, you really had a tough year. Know that we are here for you, will be right there with you as we all are striving for improved health in 2010.

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    We are here for you!!! I know 2009 was a sad year for you!! Your SP friends are here to back you 100%. I am back too! Please keep in touch!

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Not doing so well on the Healthier Me

Tuesday, October 27, 2009

Last week I was all into a healthier me, but something happened and lost the motivation. Wednesday was my birthday and I ended celebrating with way too much wine on Friday and then a graduation party on Saturday and then yesterday my mother was rushed to the hospital and now she is in the ICU on a ventilator. I feel like my life is getting in the way of a healthier me. I know it excuses but I don't what to do to change things.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

XHOOSIERLOSER 10/28/2009 6:42PM

    I'm so sorry to hear about your mom. Overwhelming doesn't even come close to the feeling something like this brings on. Just remember that you have to take care of yourself to be a help to her. Take one minute at a time, and make the best choices you can. Just know that you have a whole bunch of great people pulling for you and your mom. God bless.

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SMYLEERED 10/28/2009 9:31AM

    We support you no matter what! There will always be times when life's hardships start to pile up and we feel lost and confused and nothing seems to be going right. There is hope~just don't give up on yourself. You are worth every minute you invest into being healthy. If you have to postpone your plans for a while, so be it. When the time is right, you can get back on track. Saying a prayer for your mother's well being and yours.

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QUILTINGQUE 10/27/2009 10:16PM

    The important thing is that you don't give up. One bad day, or even a few, are not enough to give up. Hang in there. Better, healthier, thinner days are waiting for you. I hope all goes well for your mom.

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Time for a healthier me!!

Monday, October 19, 2009

With everything that has happened in the last few weeks and the fact that on Wednesday I turn 34, I decided to make some changes. First, I am resetting my goals. I shifting back to zero and starting anew. I decide to go bigger this time. When I found out I was pregnant, I had lost 25 lbs and was down to 155, only 5 lbs shy of my original goal. I gained back 5lbs during the time I was pregnant (mainly cause carbs seemed to be the only thing that stayed down), so now I find myself at 160. Still down 20lbs from where I started, but now I have decided to shot for the weight that I should at my height, a skinny 135 and that means I need to loss another 25 lbs. I will start tracking everything that goes in my mouth again and eating right (no more quick runs for lunch). I started using EA Active on the Wii last week and I really like, so I will continue with that, but I also want to add in some other workouts.

Also as part of the healthier me, I have decided to stick with the stop smoking plan the doctor started me on. I had made it to the 5 smokes a day level, but when I had the miscarriage, I started smoking more again. So this week I will go over 10 smokes a day, next week 8, the following week 5, and so on. I like this plan cause it doesnít require any medicine or any of that awful gum and it seemed to be working. So if all goes as planned, I will be a nonsmoker in a few weeks.

I have the plan and the plan is in writing, now it is time to act! Wish me luck!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MOMFAN 1/16/2010 6:40AM

    My heart so goes out to you, my dd had three miscarriages in the past two years. I just want to give you a big hug! I am also proud of you for keeping the focus to get healthy.

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SMYLEERED 10/20/2009 5:47PM

    emoticon Good luck cutting down on smoking and the plans you have to get down to your goal weight. Keep us updated on your progress.

Comment edited on: 10/20/2009 5:48:29 PM

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MOXIE-IN-MOTION 10/19/2009 8:38PM

    You have a wonderful attitude and can definitely do it! Quitting smoking is rough...but it can be done!

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JULESELLEN 10/19/2009 6:44PM

    You can do it! emoticon

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Harder than I ever thought

Wednesday, October 14, 2009

This miscarriage has been harder on me than I ever dreamed it would be. I think that I am dealing and then I find myself sitting here crying. I don't know why I am crying. I am just crying. I am trying to get my life back to normal but I can't seem to do it. I tell myself every morning today I am going to eat right and exercise, but I just can't seem to do it. I find myself still craving foods I wouldn't normally eat, like pancakes in the middle of the afternoon. I guess I let myself fall into bad habits while I was pregnant and now that I am not, I can't seem to leave the bad habits behind. And now there is halloween candy sitting here waiting for the trick or treaters, but I find myself going for a piece every time I walk by (I should have never let DH open the bags).

Sorry for venting, I am just sitting here all by myself feeling bad for myself, so I had to get it out somewhere.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

JENNA-P 12/3/2009 4:55PM

    Please feel free to vent anytime you want. We are all here for you!! It takes time to heal so take as much time as you need. I joined the Mommies of Angel Babies team and I found it very helpful after my daughter was stillborn. I used to vent on there all the time.

Just take your time and when you are ready to get back to exercising you will.

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TARABEAR 10/15/2009 7:28PM

    Here's the link to Mommies of Angel Babies.

p.s. I love your doggy!!!

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TARABEAR 10/15/2009 7:22PM

    My heart goes out to you. It's almost one year to the day since my miscarriage. It was really hard for me to recover and I still cry if I think about it too much.

My advice (if you're ready for advice, if not, that's OK, too!) Give yourself lots of time to heal and make sure you have enough support and the right support (some people are not as much help as they try to be). Consider talking to a counselor or others who have had the same experience. (There is a SP team called Mommies of angel babies that you might find useful.)

Don't try to change everything today. Take things one day at a time and try to make one positive step each day. Feel good about any positive change that day. Whatever it is.

OH, and get the candy out of the house. :0)

emoticon emoticon emoticon

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SMYLEERED 10/14/2009 11:01PM

    Grieving is part of the process, you need to go through that. Maybe the foods you're eating is your way of dealing...maybe not. Comfort foods are the things we reach for when we're in an emotional state, trying to salve over something that is hard to bear. I wish I could offer some suggestion to help. If venting helps you, then keep doing that. Maybe someone's comment will jump out at you and offer you the comfort you need.
God bless....

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SDEHNKE 10/14/2009 9:20PM

    Be kind to yourself right now. It's hard to try to get back to the way you were before the baby because that would be like saying that it didn't happen. You are a different person now and need to grieve for what you loss. It's good that you realize that you're reaching for the food because you are sad. Just feel what you feel and we'll be here if you need to talk. emoticon


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ALEXSGIRL1 10/14/2009 7:42PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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