Wednesday, October 01, 2014
So I am learning now more than ever, in many areas of my life, that it is all about every choice. I have a choice to make every morning when I wake up and every time I walk in the kitchen and every time my child disobeys, etc. I have a choice when I open the laptop to work or to surf mindlessly or to go to SP or to Ravelry.com or to Facebook. I have a choice.
This is a new week. My choices this week have been good with regard to food and tracking my food and water and really seeing what I am taking in and how easy it is to really stay within my goals. This week, my husband and I were made aware of just how much we have let our health slide...and now it's time to make that choice to take this new week, with new effort to change things for the better.
It has been 5 years this month that I joined SP. FIVE years that I have wasted (almost typed WAISTED!!!!). FIVE years that I could have been in shape, maybe even gotten pregnant and had that baby we have dreamed of having. FIVE years of wasting it all away under the weight and strain (not only my physical weight, but the emotional weight of stress upon my life). I have had an amazing change in my life in many ways this year, experiencing a new and fresh encounter with God and my walk with Him is at a totally different place than it has been. IT'S TIME that I have this newfound freedom in my physical life as well. It is starting with me, this week, with tracking my food and water, with spending time here on SP, and getting our fitness room set up and ready to go!
We're going to do this!!! Together! I am so excited. For the first time, maybe EVER, something has clicked. I just finished reading Lysa TerKeurst's book, "Made to Crave." It totally speaks to the heart of the issues of emotional eating and the longing we try to fill with food. What a great time to be reading this book!
So, here's to positive things. I'm moving forward, one step at a time!
Saturday, February 15, 2014
I'm back. I'm trying to come back. I need to come back. WHY is this so difficult for me?
I'm here for the moment and that's what matters, isn't it? The fact that I am NOT letting go of the desire to make a change. Now if I could just MAKE the change!
Wednesday, August 14, 2013
Just don't know how else to describe my emotions today.
I'm so impatient with myself. Watched a documentary last night called "Hungry for Change"--have you seen it? So informative and helpful. I can totally relate to the the emotional struggle behind all of this. I must sound absolutely crazy to anyone reading because one day I'm up and one day I'm down. It changes within the course of the day, too! It's so foreign to me to think positively about myself, my body, and my emotions just get the best of me at times.
It's a spiritual struggle as well, I'm fully aware of that. If I rely on God's strength to win this battle, then the enemy doesn't like it and will fight against me each step of the way. That's what's happening here. How do I learn to keep more positive? more disciplined? more consistent? Enough of the talking and writing about it...where does the DOING it come in?!?!
It does help to pop onto SP and find an encouraging article or quote or comment. Thank you to SP, PHYLISSCR, who left me an encouraging comment this week. I'm feeling rather alone in the mental part of my battle. I have my husband and family who want to be healthy and are great sports with the food changes, and all. It's just the mental struggle that I feel like no one understands.
I think I'll go read a few articles and watch some videos for encouragement. If you're a praying person, I'd appreciate your prayers in this very spiritual battle for me. Thank you!
Saturday, August 10, 2013
I'm a wreck. Mentally, emotionally, spiritually, etc. I need to get back to the basics and focus on all the things I can control. This means leaving the things I cannot control behind!
I can control: my diet, my use of free time, my connection with God in making more time to be with Him, my role as wife and mom in my daily life, my choice to move forward instead of backward, my reaction to stress and emotions, finding time to exercise
I cannot control: others' thoughts and attitudes and behaviors (even my children!), past choices which can't be changed, stress that is bound to come my way, changing the years and years of my life that I've not lived healthy
I'm sure there is more for both of those categories. The fact of the matter is I have wasted too much time. I started on SP in October of 2009 after my Dad passed away and I don't think I've ever fully "gotten it." It is time to really "Get it!" I'm coming up on my 4th "anniversary" of being here. I haven't accomplished most of my goals, and I've revised them time and time again. It's time to actually make it happen! It's the first day of the rest of my life. Here I go...
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