Monday, October 18, 2010
I listen to many people say they are losing weight for the wedding, class reuion, for a party.
I had the drean that when I become thin everything will be happy and I will be happy.
My marriage will be wonderful, my kids will behave, I will love my work and I will fit in.
That is my biggest wish that I could fit in, that I would be accepted. I do not want to be talked about anymore.
But that is a dream and I now see that being thin will not make me accepted. Being thin will not make me happy. If I am not happy with myself no matter how much I lose I find something to hate myself about. If people do not accept me fat they will not accept me thin. I need to enjoy and live my life for myself and not for others. This time I am losing weight for me.