MOM4407   69,731
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Learning to say NO

Thursday, August 23, 2012

So today I say NO to people when I was busy and others wanted me to help them.
I said NO. Wow were they shocked. I usually stop what I was doing and help others. I would then stay late and do my work. Today I said NO I am busy doing my work and I can not help you.
I may lose friends they are the ones telling me to learn to say no. I should not feel guilty about saying NO. But why do I feel guilty then??

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MAYRASDSD 9/6/2012 7:29AM

  Saying NO is very hard at times. You are a true friend and a very nice person at heart and that is why it may be more difficult. Do not worry about losing any friends. You are just keeping your true friends. A lot of the times people react out of emotion and then later on regret. If you did lose a friend, don't be surprise if they come back and apologize at a later point.

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SUNNYWBL 8/26/2012 2:33AM

    Just try to tell yourself - Now I need to remember to breath and love myself.

Then take another deep breath and say - "Just as soon as I get my own work done I WILL help you then"

. emoticon emoticon emoticon

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MNNSAIDE 8/25/2012 7:42AM


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ADARKARA 8/24/2012 8:19AM

    Not feeling guilty about these things takes time. You didn't say no because you were mean or spiteful, you said it because you genuinely had other things to do. You shouldn't feel guilty for wanting to get your own work done. =)

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ELSCO55 8/23/2012 11:42PM

    Good for you. I really need to learn to do this.

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LIVEDAILY 8/23/2012 11:27PM

    emoticon Use your powers wisely! Seriously, I'm sure you want to help EVERYONE but there will be times when you'll just have to evoke "the power" and calmly and politely say No. And don't beat yourself up about it either. That's being negative, and will have a tendency to turn around and bite you in the patootie. It is okay to say no; it's okay to be able to eat your lunch at lunch time; it's okay to be able to get YOUR work done; and it's perfectly okay to leave school/work at a reasonable hour.

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50ISNEW30 8/23/2012 11:03PM

    Because you're a kind and giving person who wants to help others. Keep saying no until you get caught up and maybe you can be selective in helping others again.

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MOM4407 8/23/2012 10:56PM

    Thank you everyone for posting on my blog. I am in tears with the support I am getting. Truly it is overwhelming to me how many people agreed with me.

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KDAILEY70 8/23/2012 10:48PM

    No reason to feel guilty.

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DIDMIS 8/23/2012 10:48PM

    Sometimes we just have to say no Becky.

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VICTORY2XS 8/23/2012 10:43PM

    You are doing great, keep it up, it will get easier and you will be happier with yourself for sticking to it!

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HEALTHYOTTER 8/23/2012 10:36PM

    Feeling guilty is a probably a habit for you, as is the urge to do whatever anyone asks of you. Standing up for yourself is building your self-confidence, your self-worth, helping you realize how much you are worth, certainly worth the healthy choices you're making every day! If the price of friendship is you doing someone else's job, it's doesn't seem like a very healthy relationship, and you're worth much more! emoticon

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DLDROST 8/23/2012 10:35PM


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ANNESYLVIA 8/23/2012 10:29PM

    Terrific! If you truly are busy and cannot help someone without jeopardizing you own work then you should not feel guilty. And your friends are correct in that you need to learn to say no. If your friends get upset well then they were not really good friends.

JUST SAY NO! emoticon

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Hard Days

Wednesday, August 22, 2012

Do you ever have a day when everything starts out right?
You get up early exercise and feel great.
You have a healthy breakfast and feel wonderful.
You have packed your lunch and do not have time to eat it.
You are at work and the computer will not work, the boss wants the report, people are wanting things from you and the mins are passing too quickly. There does not even seem like there is time to go to the restroom.

Your routine has been interrupted. You do not eat at the regular time. You look at the clock and you need more time. You have skipped your morning snack.
At 3:00pm you are hungry and frustrated then you think OH I have not had lunch.
You eat while looking at the computer and do not even taste the food and you inhale it.
On the drive home all you think about is work, leaving late and what you are making for dinner. You know the family is hungry and you need to get home fast.
You pass McDonald's I really need an ice cream, I can just pick up some burgers it is so cheap.
You pass the store chocolate would help calm me down, I could get some fried chicken the kids like it. Chips sound great tooo. How about some take out from the China Town Place?
You know inside that ice cream and chocolate will not make you feel better but you are what upset, nervous, mad at yourself for not eating lunch, mad at yourself you not leaving work early. You know as soon as you walk in the house the kids and DH will want food now.

How often do we really stop and think? Is food the answer or do I even know the question I am trying to ask? Do I just want to push down these feelings so I do not feel and more?

How can I stop this cycle
1. Admit to myself I have emotions.
2. Allow myself a moment to feel I mean really take a breath and feel.
3. Say a prayer. So many things are beyond our control and I need to allow God to handle these.
4. I need to plan for days like this. There are healthy dinners I can get ready quick for the family. Or just have cereal for supper. Is it bad to have breakfast for supper.
5 Write in a journal. It will help me express the inter feelings. I need time to reflect about what is going on and let my mind calm down.
6. Write on Sparkpeople. I have found just write a blog or posting in the chat room really helps. Reaching out to someone who knows how your feeling is the best.

If you have any other suggestions please tell me.
Now that I am back to work my hard days are at least it seems everyday.
Everyday I have to fight the urge to drive past McDonald's, Not stop and get the chocolate bar., I;m glad my family does not mind having breakfast for supper and even my DH has started to cook if I call him ahead of time.
I have to write in my journal so I can express my feels and not bury them inside or cover them up with food. I have a great life. I love my job and I love the people I am around. Now I need to remember to breath and love myself.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SUNNYWBL 8/26/2012 2:29AM

    Put a sign at your desk and in your car to remind yourself ; Now I need to remember to breath and love myself.

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50ISNEW30 8/22/2012 11:35PM

    Crock Pot is handy for having dinner ready when you walk in the door. Or the outdoor grill for quick chicken or burgers. Toss a salad and throw some veggies in the microwave - I even microwave corn on the cob - tastes great and is fast. To eat snacks and lunch on schedule just tell your co-workers or boss that you need to eat on a regular basis for health purposes - not lying. Everyone should eat at regular intervals to maintain level blood sugars.
I'm sorry your job is so stressful, but you have identified ways to deal with it, just remind yourself to do it. We're here for you to vent any way you need to.


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LIVEDAILY 8/22/2012 6:45PM

    You need to eat lunch!! You just have to be able to say to folks..."You know, I haven't eaten lunch, and unless ya'll want me to either go mental on ya'll or pass out, I need to eat". And then go squirrel yourself away somewhere for 30 minutes and eat quietly.

Years ago, I read some really good advice about planning for dinners, and you cook MOST of what you'll be eating on the weekend. For example, if you bake 2 chickens on Sunday, that would be for 2 meals. Add a meatloaf, and that's another meal and possibly lunch. You can stir fry a ton of stuff and have it. A roast can do double duty, too. And NO, there's absolutely nothing wrong with having breakfast for dinner once in a while. You can make a strata the night before, pop it in the fridge, and pop it in the oven when you get home from work. Add salads and veggies and your good to go!! And you are need to PLAN. Once you do it a couple of times, then it will become second nature. Some families (the DH and kids) would be perfectly happy with pracically the same meals on a rotating basis. If it's Tuesday, then it must be spaghetti night sort of thing. You might want to ask them what their favorite meals are when you begin planning.
emoticon emoticon

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MNNSAIDE 8/22/2012 1:10PM

    First of all my friend - your district should have allowed you time for lunch.
I am on my lunch break (1hour and 1/2) I'll call your boss!!!

Second my McDonalds friend - NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Third my tired and frustrated friend - Breakfast is ok for supper!

Fourth my friend - pre - set meals at home everyday and have hubby and kids finish cooking or heating up the meal. I live alone so no worry for me! Well the zoo!

Fifth my friend - hang in there you have it all in control.

Sixth my friend............gotta go back to work myself!!!

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FERRETLOVER1 8/22/2012 10:43AM

    I have nothing to add - you have covered it all beautifully.

emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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LUV2RUN72 8/22/2012 8:44AM

    I have had those days too. Great suggestions for breaking the cycle.

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DUKETTE316 8/22/2012 7:50AM

    So very true. Even in my small town, we have McDonalds and Taco Bell with a drive-thru that are a temptation because I'm so tired after work. I find that if I plan, I'm much more likely to stick to it. That and prayer are the two most calming helps I have!

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DIDMIS 8/22/2012 5:32AM

    Since I do not have that problem my excuses are others. Praise God for a DH who is willing to cook.

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Prepared for the week

Sunday, August 12, 2012

"If you fail to plan, you plan to fail."

This is Sunday and I have prepared my lunches for the week.
5 oatmeals measured and ready to go
5 strawberry yogurts
5 salads
5 salad dressings
5 containers of grapes
5 containers of cucumbers slices to eat
5 bags of carrots
5 tomatoes
5 oat bran

Now this is just the start. I usually add some K Breakfast bars and some protein to eat with my salad. I am ready for the week. I just open the frig and pack my lunch.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

NDTEACHER1 8/15/2012 12:59AM

    Nice job!

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MAYRASDSD 8/14/2012 10:25PM

  Very organized.

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50ISNEW30 8/13/2012 6:32PM

This is very motivating for me. Thank you.

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FERRETLOVER1 8/13/2012 7:09AM

    Love it!!

emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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SUNNYWBL 8/13/2012 1:20AM

    I used to do this back in the day when there were three daughters and a DH!

emoticon emoticon emoticon

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DIDMIS 8/12/2012 7:08PM


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MOVEIT2LOSEIT42 8/12/2012 6:13PM

    I do the same thing! Makes it so easy in the mornings to just grab and go.

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Summer is a forgotten Vacation

Saturday, August 11, 2012

In the summer I love being outside
here is a picture with a friend of mine at the beach

She is an inspiration to me because she has lost over 70lbs and she maintains healthy eating habits.

So for me the summer is over.
I am back to work and the restful naps are a forgotten memory.
This summer I lost 20lbs.
I am going to try to lose 30lbs before the end of the the year.
I know for me I have to eat 1200cals and exercise everyday.

In the morning it is hard to get up at 5:30am to walk on the treadmill but I know I have to do it.

Today was my day of rest. I enjoyed the afternoon nap.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

NDTEACHER1 8/13/2012 11:26PM

    That is wonderful, good for you!

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FERRETLOVER1 8/12/2012 9:02AM

    It looked like you guys were having a great time. It's good to have friends you can look up to for inspiration.

20 lbs. gone - be proud!! You are emoticon

I know you can emoticon yourself to walk on the emoticon in the wee early hours of the morning. Just think of the rewards! emoticon

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LYNNRODRIGUEZ 8/11/2012 9:47PM

    You know what you have to do. That's a good thing. Stay focused. You've come a long way and emoticon.

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MNNSAIDE 8/11/2012 9:11PM

    Looks like a lot of exercise!

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DIDMIS 8/11/2012 8:31PM

    I liked that Becky. Looks like fun but not for me as I am afraid of water.

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Meal at Olive Garden

Sunday, August 05, 2012

This was a birthday week for me.
Starting with mine and then my youngest daughter. For me we had steak and cake. I must admit that I did have my cake but I went for a 3 mile walk afterwards. I had saved my calories knowing what I would eat and I enjoyed it. The next day I had the cake for supper. This has been the only cake in a long time. I enjoyed my birthday and the cake.

Today to celebrate my daughter's B-day we went to Olive Garden. I ordered the Apricot Chicken 290 cals
I had the lunch serving. Yum

and minestrone soup 100 cals.(2 bowls)

I am glad I did my research before I went. I used Sparkpeople and I went to the restaurant site to get the calories of each meal.
I did not have the bread 140cals per piece and I did not eat the salad 190 cals.

I spent about 500 cals for the meal. I was very happy and full with the meal.

Olive Garden's Venetian Apricot Chicken and the Minestrone soup recipe is on Sparkpeople.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SUNNYWBL 8/10/2012 10:25PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon

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LUV2RUN72 8/6/2012 8:02AM

    Happy birthday (late)! Way to go eating healthy at Olive Garden. emoticon emoticon

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NDTEACHER1 8/5/2012 10:11PM

    Good job! It was your birthday, you should have some cake, good for you!

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IMAVISION 8/5/2012 8:13PM

    Happy belated Birthday to both your daughter & you.

You made wise food choices!

God bless!


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