Friday, April 29, 2011
Today I read the article "Surround yourself with the Positve."
What a great article.
In Texas we have a test for students in Grades 3-12 called the TAKS.
This test is to assess how well the students are doing in school.
In reality it tests how well the teachers are teaching in school. So if the students are failing it means the teachers are not doing their jobs and the teachers are failing. Negative! Negative!
"Surrounding yourself with negativity will drain the energy, life and hope right out of you like a leech. Seems pretty obvious, but too often, we allow these negative messages to seep through."
This is a quote from the article. It is so true. Since January I have been tutoring a few students to try to get them to understand the basics Math, basic writing and basic Reading.
Why can they not remember I just went over it? Why can they not focus? Why can third graders not tell time??? Why I am not a good teacher? Why I have not found the way to teach them so they will remember I am not good? They are failing. I have failed them. ect, ect ect. Everyday these are the thoughts I have. Every night this is what I am thinking. I am looking and listening to other teachers say the same thing and feel the same way.
The Government is saying the teachers/librarians and our schools are no good. That means I am not good. My job may be cut because librarians are not needed to help students learn. Teachers/librarians pay is being cut. I went to college got a degree but I am not important enough to get paid even $1 dollar per hour per student I work with. According to society as an adult my worth is with my pay how much money I make. I do not even get $25 per hour for 8 hours of work and some nights 13 hours of work. Even a babysitter gets more than $1 an hour.
"Everyone runs into a wall at some point. You’re not alone if you feel discouraged. " says Mike Kramer in his article Surround Yourself with the Positve.
I hear a song on the radio that says if people really knew the true me would want me. I think no. No I am not worth it.
I am glad I have a God who does know the real me. He knows my darkest thoughts and he knows how I feel. He died because he felt I am worth it. I am important in God eyes. Society is wrong. I am worth it.
I have time now to listen to the voice that will say I am an important person. I am a important member of society. I do a good job. I need to tell myself that every day. I was important enough for someone to die for me.
I asked the kids when they were finished with the test was it worth it. (I am talking about third graders) Was it worth staying late until 5:00pm at night. Was it worth all the homework, coming to school on Saturday, being scolded my me for not listening, not going out to play ect ect ect. The group I was with all said yes. It was worth it.
I do not know. I do not think the stress of the test is worth it but I do know the kids are worth the time I spent with them. They are worth it.
I am not going to listen to the negative voice. I am going to surround myself with the positive. I will listen to the voice of God saying I am worth it. I am going to be a positive person and not the negative one. I need to remember to help shine the light that is in me cause I have a God that knows I am important.