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Momma didn't raise no fool ....

Thursday, April 01, 2010

Okay, March just plain sucked...or should I be more honest and say...that my behavior during the month of March really sucked. (In like a lion..out like a lamb)...yeah. I'm over it. Back in the saddle again..yeeeeehawwww.

I might fall down..but I keep gettin' up... been that way all my life... no reason to stop now..haha.

Still finding my balance...not quite sure how much I'll spark...probably here and a little...comment a little...etc. Spend more time outside walking with Haley...try to move this body more....

Begin Again - 2010! Looking forward to April showers? huh? Am I gonna' cry or something? haaaaaa....well, if I'll water all my May flowers..that's for sure.

All I know is this.... Winners never quit and quitters never win!

I'm a winner!

You are, too!

..Now where'd I put that saddle???


  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

INGRACE 4/3/2010 10:02PM

  Go get your Steven Curtis Chapman cd and play "The Great Adventure" as loud as it will go! The first line of that song is 'Saddle up your horses, We've got a trail to blaze.Out in the wild blue yonder of God's amazing grace." We use it at chore time to get us all moving. emoticon

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CAROLANN27 4/3/2010 1:07PM

    Hi Michele,

Maybe you can use the rebirth of spring as your personal springboard. You have done so well, and you have so many people pulling for you. Finding balance is so hard, but I have every confidence you will. Your not giving up is what is going to get you to your goals!!! Happy to see your blog and I'm pulling for you!



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JANE1216 4/2/2010 7:05PM

    I just LOVE that quote: winners never quit and quitters never win!!!!! That earns a double woohoo!!!!

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I enjoyed your blog and agree with you that we just have to begin again --- it's a new month, a new season, a new quarter, it's even a new grading period for those of us who are involved in "grades" --- so you go girl! You git in that saddle and you git on down the trail to success!!! I'm right with ya on this one ---- yeeeehawwwwww fer sure!!!

Ya'll have a wunderful weekend, ya hear!?!?!?

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    emoticon Many of us are doing a start over this month!

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    Nice to see your blog.

You know, that's what I do. I spark every day, but also here a little and there a little. I do log my fitness minutes and I do spin for SparkPoints every day. I love reading blogs, but I don't always respond. And that's it for me.

If you're struggling, maybe logging your food would be good, but I've found that it's a lot of effort. Usually I just count my calories. 400 for each breakfast, lunch and dinner and that leaves at least 200 for "unforeseen circumstances". :-)

Here is to a new (less sucky) month. Hope you've found your saddle. It's on!

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LOVE_2_LAUGH 4/1/2010 11:43AM

    Glad you're back in the saddle! Have a great April!

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LISALOSING52 4/1/2010 6:32AM

    March wasn't that great for me either. I'm ready to get back in the saddle again also! I'm with you friend Let's go. YEE HAWW!

Have a great day!


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I Wanna' Be Free.....

Friday, March 26, 2010

I'm on my quest to "Find Balance".....

Why is the grass always greener on the other side?

If we got everything we wanted, would we REALLY be happy? Or...would we find something to NOT be happy about?

What does "NORMAL" feel like? What does real CONTENTMENT feel like?

Perhaps we must define what OUR normal is...what OUR contentment is.

We're always COMPARING, aren't we!?! Comparing ourselves with others, etc...when the fact of the matter is: EACH ONE OF US IS UNIQUE!!!

There are no two people in this world who are EXACTLY alike. Sure, there are similarities in values, experiences, likes and dislikes....but no two people are exactly alike.

In trying to find my balance...I'm going to continue to remind myself that ...when I don't feel like I'm measuring up to...or keeping up with...or doing as well as... others, ...that I am a unique individual and my program must be tailor-made for ME.

Pressure and anxiety be gone!

I want this journey to be a walk...a nice walk down a garden path. You know...smell a few flowers...pull a few weeds...dig a few holes...mend a few fences....admire the sights and sounds and smells... and Just smile. (and eat lunch under a tree..lunch is

I've never been at peace...there's always that old "internal angst" going on in there.

What I'm hoping to achieve is not some kind of "Nirvanic Bliss"...but just a good old sense of "wholeness" from the inside out. Breathe in...breathe thankful...ahhhh.

I really do like myself... I really do appreciate the "me" I am today....I just have to make the outside match the inside...that's all. Then...after that happens...we'll see how it goes.

Truly the need to control everything comes from a place of "having NO control"... or of "LOSING CONTROL".

Ahhhh to be a bird and just flyyyyyyyyyyyyy.... to soar above the clouds and just glide....letting the wind lift me.... take me where it will.

Freedom is a big deal.

I wanna' be free.

Look Ma.... no hands!

John 8:32 And ye shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SUSIEMILO 3/28/2010 9:50PM

    Well said.
There is always going to be someone richer, thinner, prettier, healthier, smarter, stronger, etc. etc. etc.
And there is always going to be someone poorer, fatter, uglier, sicker, dumber, weaker, etc. etc. etc.
We are who we are, and it's up to us to make the best of it, and improve that which is possible to improve and that we have a desire to change.
Celebrate you for who you are. You are a child of the most high God, and he doesn't make mistakes.

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RUSTYSHAW1 3/28/2010 1:55PM

    We could be identical twins. You express so well what I have been working on. I merely said, I was looking for contentment and would be so happy to achieve that state of mind. You added ALL the details. Thank you so. much. I hope lots of people read your blog. Rusty. emoticon emoticon

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DEBRA_T 3/27/2010 1:32PM

    You make a very good case for leaving the "shoulds" behind -- not that I would tell you that you should leave the shoulds behind. LOL! Each to their own life, way, struggle, success. It is a solitary pursuit but there are those of us who are doing it too -- not exactly like any other one of us, but all headed in basically the same direction. Toward freedom.

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CAROLANN27 3/26/2010 7:16PM

    I wish you peace and freedom, too. Comparing ourselves to others can be so destructive. You're right about everyone being unique. Not only is every person unique, the challenges each of us faces within our lives are unique too. I think you will find what you're looking for by staying open and loving---and not being too busy! God bless you.

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KBUCKMASH 3/26/2010 6:28PM

    Oh how I can relate. I just have never been able to find the words to express it. A big emoticon for finding those words. It is nice to know someone else has the same predicament. I chose the butterfly because it was to represent a new and changed me - a rebirth of sorts. After reading your blog maybe some part of me just wanted to fly away from everything.

I keep reminding myself it is just one step or changed thought at a time and I will get there. Maybe not tomorrow or next month but I will get there. The same is true for you.

Comment edited on: 3/26/2010 6:29:01 PM

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    emoticon emoticon emoticon It sounds like you are really searching, searching, and looking and peering and wondering. My, my what will the next bend around the corner bring into my life. Life is good and sweet and too short. I just plain like you the way that you are. I sure do hope you can figure you out. I truly believe that you need this break from too much pressure and pushing for what ever, people push for stuff that they dont even know what they are striving and pushing for. You need an explosive infilling of the hot and passionate and liquid fire of the love of the creator of this entire existence. The Lord God All Mighty, He is a fire from the loins up and a fire from the loins down. Just ask Him to fill you to over flowing with His hot liquid love which full fills all desires. Have the kind of weekend that you want, but, just stay sweet and in love and in faith. emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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BUGGYS 3/26/2010 3:42PM

    I really have stopped comparing myself to others...guess that happens when you reach 59...I just want to feel better and look in the mirror and like what I see!!! Enjoyed your blog!!!

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LOVE_2_LAUGH 3/26/2010 3:31PM

    What a nice, uplifting blog. I am always trapped in that world of comparing and finding myself wanting. Self-acceptance and contentment are hard for me, but I'm working on it. It sounds like you're well on your way to getting "there." I hope the journey does end up being a peaceful, quiet walk down a garden path for you. Hope all is well with you -- I miss seeing you around SP, but totally understand. Wishing your a peaceful and contented weekend.


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SHERRY257 3/26/2010 1:09PM

    I don't have any advice! I just thought I would say I am praying for you on your journey. Remember to have a great day! emoticon

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KENDRACARROLL 3/26/2010 11:20AM

    Growing up my mom always used to say she wants to be a butterfly. Bird or butterfly, I guess the desire to fly away and leave it all behind is tempting. But with the bad, wouldn't we leave behind the good as well?

If we obtained everything we desire what would there be left to do but die?
I think goals is what keeps us going. Strive to be the best we can be.

If you asked a hundred people what normalcy and contentment are, you'd probably get a hundred different answers.

Stroll along the garden path - ahh, sounds lovely (for a day or two). But with challenge comes contentment. Mastering life's challenges, the ups, the downs, and the in betweens is living. Hard to grasp when you're over-stressed and over-extendend.

Can you tell I'm currently reading a book on positive thinking? (And I have three more lined up after I'm finished with this one. emoticon emoticon emoticon

More of my ramblings... (really have to go to work now...)

Have a blessed day my friend.

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PTCAKES 3/26/2010 6:07AM

    I think we stop comparing when we realize that the contentment we are searching for is already within us, warts, thighs, double chins, balding and all.

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Reprioritizing, reorganizing...finding balance!

Sunday, March 21, 2010

Life can be a whirlwind and I have been trying to come up with a schedule that will allow me to spark and still keep up with my many responsibilities at home. Balance!

I'm so thankful for all my sparkfriends and those who have taken the time to stop by and comment on my blogs. I wish I had more time to spend with all of you.

My responsibilities at home have suffered due to my sparking and my not being able to keep up with the emails, comments, etc. Oh, I've loved every minute of it...but I already had a full plate and the plate is

You could say that I've become a plate spinner and a juggler.
My plates are crashing and my balls are
Now I have to clean up the mess.

So, I will be logging in to enter my foods into my nutritional tracker.
I'll be entering my fitness stats.
I'll be blogging much less...probably reaading more.

Maybe I'll simply become a lurker and instead of commenting on the blogs directly, send an email or something...I'm not sure yet. I have to find a way to stop the avalanche of emails from coming in.

I just can't handle 60 plus emails everyday. I tried turning off some of the features and notifications...but it still hasn't worked. If anyone has any suggestions, I welcome them.

I figure if I do less blogging...there will be less emails, etc...and turn off my activity feed stuff.

I feel a personal responsibility to get back with every single person and feel terrible when I can't. I don't like that feeling.

SP is fun for me and I want to keep it that way. I don't want it to become a burden.

I haven't done so well in the month of March and I need to get back on way.

I expect to be using SP for a long I won't be leaving it. I think it's great and I love the support from all of the lovely people I've met here. It's made all the difference.

So, we'll see if I can make this work.

God bless each and every one of you! I'll miss keeping up with your activities, etc...and I'll pop in from time to time...when I have see how you're doing!

Please feel free to email me...I'll still be here...just a little less visible! lol

God bless and have a wonderful new week ahead!


  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

CAROLANN27 3/25/2010 9:19PM

    Hi Michele,

I think you've hit on something we all struggle with to some extent or other. I have had thoughts that it is taking too much time from my husband, so I also have made a few cutbacks. I had a certain number of points I wanted to earn every day, but when I have spent quite a bit of time on a particular day, but doing things that don't give a lot of points, I am not being compulsive about continuing until I get those points.

My plate is nowhere near full, being newly retired, and I have wondered how some of you, who have a lot going on, keep up. You're smart to recognize the need for balance and we all respect that you are acting on that.

I'll check your page to keep up when you do blog. But you are so right, it should be fun and not another chore. I'll look forward to catching up whenever you have time to blog. I agree with the person who said she liked that you are not just dropping out, but that you'll just be achieving some balance by cutting back. Sixty e-mails a day! I never even got that many when I was working!

Always remember you have our love and we want what's best for you. I'll be checking in . . .

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RUSTYSHAW1 3/22/2010 11:19PM

    I think many of us are finding we need to balance the amount of time we spend "sparking". It is rewarding, educational and fun. But as with "eating" we need to learn to do it in moderation. I am speaking of myself as well here. I am trying to develop a 'rotational' pattern (if you will) so I can continue visiting all my friends, if I see someone 'crying' out I try to address that and then modify the rest of my time sparking that day.
1) I believe there is a section on the spark web site that allows you to control the types of notifications that come to your email. I only get notifications that apply to me.
2) I check the status feed and try to go over 3 or 4 pages of only the "I like this" and "comments" but don't always leave a comment. I had to limit trying to catch up here when I realized there was no catching up. I believe in one week's time I will comment on just about everyone's status one way or another. Not all, but some.
3) I set myself a # of sparkpages I visit each day and for my current friends, I figure I touch base with everyone once every 12 days. That IS GOOD, think of letter writing. How often did people exchange letters in the days before facebook, twitter, blogging, email, etc.
4) I do like to read so I include the spark article reading as part of my reading.
5) I have put my computer keyboard on a higher table so I can stand most of the time while working at the computer. I move around to keep my legs from stiffening up, I am using more caloric energy this way. Sitting too long at the computer swells up my ankles.

I hope some of these suggestions help you. They have helped me and I feel better. I don't want to let my friends go; I am also confident that we are all in the same boat.

I would appreciate any ideas you might had; please pass them along.
Warmest Regards, Rusty

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JANE1216 3/22/2010 10:59AM

    First of all --- I have to admit I did laugh at your description of juggling the plates/balls --- sorry -- but I got a visual and it was just funny!! I know it's not funny to be overwhelmed and it is so easy to get so involved on spark that nothing else gets done -- we're probably all guilty of that -- but doggone it - it's fun! And so motivating --- and that's why we're here. I think you are smart for being aware of your time spent here and doing something to cut back rather than just leave -- and I truly believe you can have the best of both worlds -- you can spark (with limits!) and still have a life! I never signed up for emails in the beginning, but can get them now - but I've never had more than just one or two here and there -- I can understand how that must take time if you answer each one. I think you've got a good plan for backing off w/o leaving altogether --- it's sort of like a food plan -- you plan to eat so much and then that's it - you're done for the day ---- same thing can apply to sparking --- you allow yourself so much and then you log off!! I think it will work!

I have really enjoyed sparking with you and will continue to keep tabs on your page -- and I'll know that you'll be here when you're able -- be at peace - God bless --

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MMICKEYP 3/22/2010 3:33AM

    Thanks, sparkfriends! It's so nice to have support and I know where to get it when I need it...from all of you! You're the best! emoticon

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TERI99 3/21/2010 10:30PM

    I hear you! This is the first that I've been on almost all weekend. It's been so nice out and I've had yard work to do. And as you said, then there are 50 emails to sift through! During the snow storms, there seemed to be more time. Balance, as you say, is the key!!
Take care!

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WISLNDR 3/21/2010 8:08PM

    I certainly understand! It has been an ebb and flow experience for me depending upon what's pressing in on me on any given day (or week!) One of the things that I didn't include in my blog today was the suspicion that spending too much time on SparkPeople is a way to avoid the things I need to accomplish.

Keep in touch once in a while and good luck on your goals!!

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SHARON2014 3/21/2010 7:53PM

    Hear! Hear! I'v already started cutting back! I tried to turn off emails as well but still got them! Others can't get them! I am just deleting them, except I can't pass up a blog from someone llike you!! Though I don't always respond! Good luck and see you around! Lee

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NWFL59 3/21/2010 7:21PM

    Best wishes for you achievement of balance. Please take time for yourself as high if not number one on your priority list otherwise how will the other things get done? Catch you at your convenience. emoticon emoticon

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MMICKEYP 3/21/2010 6:26PM

    Thank you all my dear spark friends for your understanding. I love all of you, too! You're the best! Yes, I'll spark when I can or when I find pockets of time...pockets of peace. xoxox

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LISALOSING52 3/21/2010 5:32PM

    I completely understand. It can be quite much to try to keep up with everything. You need to do what is best for you..... WE DON'T WANT YOUR SPARK TO BURN OUT!
Take care and check in when you can. We love you, ya know!


Comment edited on: 3/21/2010 5:38:22 PM

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    I understand. Totally. That's why I would prefer to find an area on the forums where I can just post a daily status and say 'Hi.' Sometimes, keeping up with everyone becomes more of a chore and less of a joy. Do what you need to do and drop in when you can and know that we still love you.

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LOVE_2_LAUGH 3/21/2010 12:29PM

    Wow -- I was going to blog about the same thing, Michelle. I'm getting way too involved/addicted to SP. I love it and will continue to use it, but I just can't keep up with all of the emails. I'm so compulsive that I can't stand to have anything in my Inbox. I'll be cutting back on my time with SP, too. This could be a fulltime job plus overtime if I let it. LOL!

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KENDRACARROLL 3/21/2010 12:17PM

    I did the same thing a while back. I'm subscribing to a handful (or maybe two handfuls) of blogs but other than that turned off all e-mail notifications.

I love reading blogs - when I feel inspired I reply. Mostly I just read.
Haven't blogged much myself. Seems that after not writing for years and years it won't come easy any more. (Will have to work on that though 'cause it's really a shame.)

Work your program, find your balance and know that we're going to be here anytime you need us.

(Please don't reply to this message... :-))

Have a great day!

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DEBRA_T 3/21/2010 12:17PM

    Ditto -- I think we all started around the same time and are experiencing the 3 Month (or so) crash at Spark. I also cannot keep up with comments, blogs, friend feeds, etc., and am cutting back on getting back to everyone all the time. I think most people don't expect it, but even if they do, I cannot go at this pace and remain peaceful and balanced (a necessary ingredient to continued weight loss).

I think you are making a wise choice.

I started to have fantasies about the 30 Day Rule -- in OA when you first get there they ask you to not speak at meetings for the first 30 days, just listen. Maybe we're both feeling that tug a little bit.

You're probably starting a trend amongst the regular Sparkers that will benefit all of us, so thank you!

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BOBBIENORTHERN 3/21/2010 12:17PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon I know exactly what you are talking about. I am at a point in my life that I have to drown myself in sparkpeople along with the word of God. A combination of the both is what is working so very well for me. I am putting what I need, to lose weight and get more of a healthy life style, and the motivation, determination and encouragement and knowledge, which all of these are never ending, I am putting all of these, right under Jesus and the word. I have to. We all have decisions and priorities. We all know what works for us. Just follow your heart and know what you have to do. Please dont respond, your response in not required by law. lol. I love you so much and know and understand exactly where you are coming from. Anyways have a really good day and get your life in order. emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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SUSIEMILO 3/21/2010 11:23AM

    Yes - I hear your cry, and have a similar one.
I also will have to cut back. My house is in chaos state right now, and it's making me unhappy to live in it.
Plus, when summer weather gets here, I'm not to be found in the house.
I'll be seeing you -- but no so often.
Take care Michelle.
(PS: no need to respond back)

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    I had to cut back, too. I compeletly understand! emoticon

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ALYFITN 3/21/2010 6:56AM

    Hey There! It sounds like you are ready for some re-prioritization and balance! You are a busy lady with Hurricane Haley and all.
I spent a lot of time on SP at first which I do not begrudge myself. Then I wrote a private list of SP tasks that were beneficial and tasks that were time wasters. I spend time on the most important ones like tracking nutrition and fitness. I like commenting on blogs. I read a lot--not just the articles but other bloggers--and at times limit myself with a timer. Hope this helps. emoticon emoticon

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Expect Good Things!...

Saturday, March 20, 2010

It could be right around the corner! That something you've been wanting...waiting for.

I wonder how many people give up and if they'd only hung in there a little while longer..they would've gotten what they wanted...

Instant gratification doesn't go along with perseverance...

We want it and we want it now...and most times..we're willing to pay for

If it worked for so and might work for me!? Sadly...time and time again we're disappointed and go on to the next great adventure.

Hard work and patience is what it really takes. Hard work and patience go hand in hand....they're friends..they're pals...buddies.

One definition for endurance is: the ability or strength to continue or last, despite fatigue, stress, or other adverse conditions; stamina

Perseverance definition: steady persistence in a course of action, a purpose, a state, etc., in spite of difficulties, obstacles, or discouragement.

See..that's what it's going to take. Not a "quick fix" but a steadiness, a calmness, a heartfelt resolve, ... a committment.

We need to replace defeating thoughts and words with ones that will empower us to keep on keepin' on....

In order to change a thought or a way of must replace it with something else.

Inspirational quotes and stories are nice...but how do you REALLY hang on to them? I've got notebooks full and just love reading them but the effect seems to be fleeting and temporary.

You hang on to them by remembering making them your own.

In my case, my best inspiration comes from reading and using the words from the's my "answer book".

I believe that the word of God is living and real and a present help to me at all times.
I believe that God gave us the examples of men and women who, like us...weren't perfect, had problems and trusted God to deliver or help them.

I was a biblical research student for over a decade so it may be easier for me...but it's really not that hard if you'd like to give it a try. I have more fun with it now than I used to when I was actually studying the bible during seminars, classes, etc.

There are many good, free bible helps out there...but me, I use works for me. we go...I type in the word; patience. All the books in the bible where the word patience is used, will be there at my fingertips. Now, you can take a look at some and find the one that hits your heart or that you'd like to look at. There are continued search results at the bottom of the page for more. Always...there is something that will just stick right out at me...and in this case, it's James I click on the dark blue "Jam 1:3". It then takes me to that verse.

There are little boxes to the left of the verse like a "C" for concordance. That will take you to the Hebrew or Greek word and sometimes can help you to gain a better understanding of what the word means. There's also a little "V" for version. That one will take you to different versions, etc.

In the concordance section, I can click on the Strong's concordance number and a definition will pop up that can further help me in my understanding of the word.

So, I've found my verse...and it's the one I'm going to hang on to...

James 1:3 Knowing this, that the trying of your faith worketh patience.

I can see that the word "trying" is the Greek word, dokemeon...which means."proving" or
"that by which something is tried or proved, a test".

The word, "faith" means; conviction of the truth of anything... believing

The word, "works" in "works patience"..means, to perform, accomplish, achieve

Patience means; steadfastness, constancy

So... what James 1:3 is communicating to my brain is this:

Know this: the proving..the real test of your believing and conviction will accomplish and help you to achieve steadfastness...endurance, perseverance.

I begin to "make it my own" by typing it out or writing it out and putting it in front of my face or somewhere that I'll see it. When I see it.. I say it...I repeat it. (Eventually, I've memorized it and it's in me...ready to use when I need it.) Or..I simply write it on a little piece of paper and stick it in my pocket. Oh, you'll forget about it...and it might take days...but it's worth it.

Now that's MY part...not so hard, is it? Nope.

I try to remember it and think about it...some people call it "pondering"..others call is "meditating"...whatever you want to call it... I do it.

I'm reminded that I've read somewhere that God doesn't tempt anyone...but test? Yeah...there are tests in life. I start to view my problem as a test. Hmmm... will I pass the test? Do I really want to? Yeah, I do. Yes..the testing and proving of whether or not I'm committed in my heart to do this thing will be determined by the way I persevere. Will I keep going? Will I give up? The hard work I'm willing to go through will tell the tale... and not just the hard work..but staying with it...even when I want to give up...which is

I guess I have some work to cramming for this's not a pop quiz, either. I pray about it... Lord, whatever you're trying to teach me...I really wanna' learn. Please help me to pass the test because deep down, I know that it's really not about me...but about who will be helped with what you've taught me.

God's part is supernatural and He does His perfect work in your spirit until it REALLY means something to your "heart". He's the one who does the "transforming"...not us. His love is an active, giving love and it never fails.

This is where my "true help" comes from....God.

I do get enlightened when I read books, etc,..and my mother being a nurse and later, a therapist...well, I've grown up being able to see things from many different view points.

I believe that all good things come from God. If you can glean good from those books or studies...then...I think that's great. It's been my experience, though...that the truest help and healing comes from living and doing the word of's lasting and everlasting.

Sorry for the long post and bible study info. I just wanted to post it in case someone would like a new way to help them to look at things, solve life's problems. I'd like to make it a little easier for anyone I meet along the path called life.

Wisdom is knowledge applied. Where you get your knowledge from will help you to grow in wisdom and then...with that can help others.

So, expect good things! Life can be full of dreary days or of the excitement, joy and hope of new and better things...a new and exciting life that's yours to enjoy living!

Me? I just like the excitement of digging up buried treasure..that's my adventure... and sharing that treasure with others!

Gotta go now... I've got a test to

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:


    Great blog! I also like

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CAROLANN27 3/20/2010 11:09PM

    Hi Michele,

I just read yesterday and today's blogs. I got many things out of them---thank you---but the thing that is sticking in my mind is perseverance, which includes patience. Thanks for the blogs.

And thanks for the message on my blog earlier.


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RUSTYSHAW1 3/20/2010 9:00PM

    I have genuinely had my bible lesson today and I truly appreciate it. I was just looking at some reference books today in the religion section of our Gigantic Library Used Book Store Sale. I did read about Wisdom; it also said be careful of the source that you gather the Wisdom from - interesting. I wish I had the time to have read more but I think the reference book was saying make sure the Wisdom comes from those recognized as ones who walk with God. Anyway, I liked it.
Hugs, Rusty emoticon emoticon emoticon

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    Hi girl friend, loved your blog and have so much conversation to comment on what you have written. I have read the books of Enoc in the and all about the angels, the good angels and the fallen angels that mated with human woman and the human woman gave birth to giants because they were half angel and half human. It also explains how God created all of all, everything, sun, moon, stars and the different portals of the east, west, south and north winds, it is so mesmerizing to read about all of this creation stuff and God and angels and demons and giants. Anyways, when I read the bible I read it out loud, never to myself. Ever since 1984 I recite certain books of the bible for months on end, month after month. Thats how I get the word into my heart and mouth and mind. I didnt even know at the time that what I was doing was called meditating. I just had fallen so helplessly in love with Father, Jesus, the word and Holy Spirit, I could not drag myself away from the word. To this day I still do the same thing, until when a crsis comes up in my life the first response from me is the word, to do the word of God. I have gone where angels fear to tred is what some people have told me, thats because you get so much word in you that you have complete trust, and faith in God because you know He loves you and will protect you and never let me or anyone else fall. But, you have to have faith in His word and love. The only way to please the Father is by faith and even that we got from Him in order to choose Jesus. You write stuff that just gets my mind spinning and my fingers typing words that just bubble up from my spirit. You touch the very core of my inner being with the love of God and the word of God that you write about. Dont ever quit, just keep it flowing as a river. We have rivers of living waters deep in our inner core and spirit. Praise God for His Royal Family of believers. emoticon emoticon

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NELLIEC 3/20/2010 6:08PM

    And of course, you know what they say about patience -- if you pray for it, you will get opportunities to use it!!! emoticon

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KBUCKMASH 3/20/2010 5:35PM

    You are forgiven for having a longer blog. It was worth it. I thoroughly enjoyed it. Understand what you might by keeping thoughts and/or ideas in a notebook or whatever but, there are times they need to be pulled out to remind oneself of what we need to be doing.

I am a believer but am terrible with scriptures so, thank you very much for the website suggestion. It will be going to the top of my list of favorites.

Hope you are being able to enjoy the first day of spring. We dodged the snow this time. It is still cool and slightly windy but was able to go out just get the yard picked-up. Think spring is coming!
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SHARON2014 3/20/2010 4:44PM

    Thanks, this provides much encouragement and insight for me today. Truly it is God's timing for both of us!

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GIVEUP30 3/20/2010 3:35PM

    Me too love dirting in the dirt..never know what you'll found God Bless

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When you look in the mirror....

Thursday, March 18, 2010

..what do you see?

1Corinthians 11:28 But let a man examine himself, and so let him eat of that bread, and drink of that cup.

Self reflection...introspection...
self examination...

What do we see when we look in the mirror?

Is it a true representation of who we are? ...of what we're thinking? feeling? doing?
Do we see the image we want to see...or the one we'd like to see?
Do we see the truth or do we make up our own truth?
I'm not talking just physically...what about emotionally?..spiritually?

When we look in the mirror do we only see our past...or do we see our future?

If you look at your reflection in the water and someone throws a rock into that water...the ripples and waves caused by that disturbance will cause your reflection to become distorted. A terrible, chaotic, raging storm can cause such turbulence that the reflection is barely recognizable anymore...

Sometimes we've been looking at a fantasy image and it takes something outside of ourselves to wake us up...shake us up..get us to see reality.

What if you asked someone what they see when they look at you?

Could you handle their response....could you handle their answer? Would you agree? Disagree? Get angry...tell them they don't know what they're talking about?

Are you afraid to do that? Why?

I have prayed this prayer before:

Psa 139:23-24 Search me, O God, and know my heart: try me, and know my thoughts:
And see if there be any wicked way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.

Why are the overeating issues always connected to the emotional? Because anything intimate IS emotional. Anything you give a part of yourself to, IS emotional and therefore...attached. Can I shake it loose? I have to...I must... I will!

I want to see the truth looking back at's going to take work....hard work. Am I willing to do it? Yes, I am. The real work is in getting past.... me.

I want to start over...start new...start fresh. Is it really that important to continue to dig into my examine every single past motivation, failure...eating issues/non eating issues?

I guess for me..the answer to that is: If it helps you to move forward...If it helps you to understand the "whys and wherefores"... If I really need those things to move get accomplish my goals...then, all means... go back in time. Go back into the time machine. Relive it. Dig up that which has been buried and make it live again. NO!!!! That's stupid...isn't it? I can't change any of it. It's done, over...and the bottom line is that nothing I think, say or do will ever change any of it.

There's a part of me that likes to waste time. What an excuse.

There's a part of me that knows the truth and hates wasting time. There's a part of me that knows and accepts; You can't change the past. You can't rewrite history.

We all know ourselves well enough to know what our problems are...just who are we trying to fool?

You must begin again. You must begin anew.

So..let's say I throw out all the stuff.....all the good, the bad..the ugly. Throw it out.
Well, then...wouldn't I lose myself? Aren't all those things the very things that make me, me?
Now I'm confused.... So, what do I do when I'm confused...and how do I simply forget everything that contributed to making me the person I am today? That doesn't make sense.

The bible says that we are to be new creatures/creations in Christ. What does that mean?
How do I become new? What do I do?

Just act like it..?

I guess I'm inclined right now to feel like the apostle Paul felt when he said; Yes, everything else is worthless when compared with the infinite value of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord. For his sake I have discarded everything else, counting it all as garbage, so that I could gain Christ. (Phil 3:8 NLT)

I have been a Christian all my life but for some reason, at this particular time in my life..the Lord has been showing me that "less of me" means "more of Him". I know that doesn't go along with the world's view of how things should be...but I do understand it.

Where is this blog going? haha...Who knows. It's just my thinking out loud.

I'm believing that more will be revealed to me as I go.

So,...I go.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SHERRY257 3/20/2010 9:42AM

    Wow, I really had to think for awhile after I read your blog. It is amazing. First, perception and really looking in the mirror--I need to take some time to do just that. Not only do I hope I have the perception correct but I hope others are perceiving me in the same way. I am afraid we all hang on to the past here at my house. Next, I need to spend some time with fellow Christians. Somehow, when we changed to this big church, I have stayed on the fringes. I guess that has a lot to do with my perception of who I am and not what God wants me to do. Maybe He just wanted me to have an intermission and he's ready for me to get back to living fully. Anyway, you are awesome. Thanks for the super blog.

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JANE1216 3/19/2010 9:48PM

    Wow! Once again you nailed it and wrote a wonderful blog that makes me think and think --- I really appreciate how you put so much into a blog and how I get so much out of reading it -- you have a gift of getting the words on paper -- this one is awesome. Thanks for sharing -- have a blessed weekend.

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    emoticon emoticon emoticon Hi my sweet sister in the spirit by Christ, I used to think like that before I got born from above and I have not been a christian my whole life. I used to be a marvelous sinner who when I gave my whole heart and being to the Lord that the evil one stepped in and faught like blazes to keep and retain me in his employment, but I cried out Jesus and just kept crying out the name that is above all names, Jesus and guess what, He came to my rescue and saved me from the evil one. Yes, this much I have learned from early on in my brand new christianity is that I am a new creation in Christ Jesus and behold the old man is dead, so everything in the past is not mine any more because I am being made daily into the image of Christ. It is a struggle alot of days for me to remember that, but, when I turn it all over to the Lord these cares of mine He handles them all because He cares for me and I than to keep my eyes and heart focused on Him and His word and His love and His precious indwelling Holy Spirit. I hope I didnt make this comment to complicated to grasp, because thats how we humans are, we tend to complicate things that are basicly easy and simple as the gospel of love. We are now a brand new creature made by Christ Jesus, there never has been and never will be again a creature such as us, the body of Jesus. I quit before I keep on talking. I love you. Have a great and sweet and relaxing weekend in beautiful and refreshing spring weather. emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

Comment edited on: 3/19/2010 2:46:41 PM

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KENDRACARROLL 3/19/2010 11:09AM

    I'm pretty sure that most of the time we do not perceive ourselves as others do and that goes for mind and body. Most people do a lot of negative self talk and we put ourselves in a much more negative light as perceived by those around us.

Then there are the lucky ones that have great self-esteem, no matter their mind or their body. We perceive them as braggers, but are they or are we just jealous? Are they happier or are they just putting on a better show?

Only I know me the way I do. Everybody else knows me the way I present myself. How much of our inner struggles do we share/should we share? That makes us vulnerable. Will this set us up for disappointment?

Our experiences and lessons learned from the past make up a great deal of who we are, how we think and how we act. Right or wrong, the past shaped us. Do we need to dwell in it and do we need to try and analyze why this or that event from the past shaped us a certain way?

I don't think it's beneficial to dwell on that too much. Mostly when we do we focus on the bad things in our past anyway. But there were plenty of good things too. They also shaped us and made us, us.

Maybe leave the past behind, put it in a far away corner, acknowledge that it's there and then move on? No time like the present.

Just my ramblings... Thanks so much for this blog!

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MARENAMOO 3/19/2010 10:31AM

    So many things in your blog. Your first part touches on your blog the other day about perception - what is reality what is my distorted filters. What about my inner self concept is letting me see only one version or part of who I am. What we see is a reflection of not just outer body colored by our inner lenses - we need to change our prescription.

Two thoughts going forward on your blog - I don't look behind me because I am not heading that way. This one speaks to not letting your past keep you from moving forward. Don't dwell on mistakes or misgivings. Move forward with grace (Grace) and confidence. Spark wants us to be healthy - mind and body.

The other conflicting is - the past is prologue. We can move forward with out guilt without looking behind ourselves. But But - if we don't sort out some of those emotions we are bound to repeat those mistakes.

So - move forward with confidence and and understanding. Don't rehash the past but let it inform your future.

As to God. He created us not to diet but to live. To live fully we should care for His gifts and enjoy them. So take care of your body and spirit, be healthy but enjoy it.

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DEBRA_T 3/19/2010 9:57AM

    You've got a lot going on there, Michele! Sometimes I think when you get to the point where you have more questions than you do answers, you're on the verge of wisdom. I think you are so right that more will be revealed to you -- keep listening, thinking, rambling. What you're doing is so important!

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DAISYDAY25 3/18/2010 10:52PM

  thanks for posting this and reminding us that it needs to be more of Jesus and less of me.

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LOVE_2_LAUGH 3/18/2010 10:50PM

    Wow - so much to think about, Michelle. Sometimes when I'm eating and it's not because of stomach hunger, I wonder if it's more a case of head/heart hunger. I wonder if maybe I'm craving that closer (more personal) relationship with God. So, maybe when I eat because I'm bored, I should make a "U" turn from the kitchen and head for the Bible. Thanks for the thought-provoking blog.

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NOTBLUSHING 3/18/2010 10:23PM

    Thought provoking.

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