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"I hardly eat anything but can't lose weight!" ... Really?

Monday, May 07, 2012

I have a very close friend who is struggling with my weightloss success. She was heavier than I, but it used to not be by much. Now it's getting close to a hundred-pound difference between us. Because of where she was emotionally, I was saying nothing to her about my weightloss, but last week she finally mentioned it and her desire to lose weight.

"The problem is," she said, "I really don't eat that much. How can I cut calories?"

I am certain that she really believes that. But when we went to Five Guys for dinner that evening, I began to see the problem:

I got a single-patty burger; she got a double-patty cheeseburger.
I drank water; she had a large milkshake.
We each split french fries with our hubbies.

Yet, if you asked her today whether she and I had eaten the same amount at that meal, I really believe she would think it was close. We each had a sandwich, a drink, and fries. Surely that's equivalent!

Yet, her meal was probably at least 700 calories more than mine.

I think this happens to everyone when they aren't tracking calories: it's easy to forget what you've eaten, underestimate how much, and ignore or justify. Over the weekend, I saw people who are frustrated with their weight nibbling on handfuls of chips--because it's just a few, right? Well, not if you do it every time you walk past the bowl!

I find it very eye-opening to watch these behaviors, because I know that they are behaviors that I fall into if I'm not paying attention. At this point, I really can't say anything to this friend as she is not ready to hear it. But it's really important to keep the possibility of calories that squeeze in through the cracks in mind.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

DANA48131 5/9/2012 1:14PM

    I was so like your friend. I could never see the errors of my ways. I always said "I don't eat that much", and maybe I didn't, but looking back now, I can see that I was surely making BAD choices, even if it wasn't "that much".

I think it's a factor of both quality AND quantity. If all a person eats is heavily processed, packaged, loaded with sugar and fat foods, even if it isn't "a lot", it is still going to have a negative effect.

I'm my own worst critic, and I never judge others to the scale I judge myself. But I am always happy to state the facts of my journey to anyone who asks. They can do what they wish with that knowledge. Everyone's journey is different.

You keep up the FANTASTIC work!


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ALICIA0099 5/8/2012 6:36PM

    I just want to say kudos to you for not being a preachy friend and realizing her boundaries. good job. I always hated hearing stuff when I wasn't ready for it.

also, great blog. good point. so true.

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MJLUVSANIMALS 5/8/2012 6:13PM

    If your friend were eating less than she thought or figured. There is another thing that may be happening. Not enough calories to burn? Metabolism takes a double header into the 0 file. Lets say all she ate that day was what you saw her eat. It may have still been under 1200 calories (I doubt it, not with that milkshake! lol) but on any other given day, she may fall short of the 1200. So therefore she has a M problem. It's probably nil, and she therefore stays at her weight at point.

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LILYGAL 5/7/2012 8:36PM

    You are so right!!! My DD used to do the same thing. But since joining WW she has found out that she was over eating. Keep up the good work and leading by example.

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CHALLENGER15 5/7/2012 6:52PM

    Yes, you are exactly right. When she is ready to "hear", I have a feeling you will be around to help her!

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BLUE42DOWN 5/7/2012 4:22PM

    I think it's similar to the deceptive way I could tell myself I wasn't as big as that person over there - as a way of feeling less obese somehow. Sure, I weigh this much, but it's not THAT high. It's less than half what those people who get stuck to their bed or sofa because they never move weight.

*sigh*

We humans are incredible at self-deception, especially when we're convinced self-preservation is involved.

I'd agree with others on encouraging her to try out SparkPeople's food tracker or even just a food diary and looking at nutritional information. She doesn't know where she can cut calories, but part of that is she doesn't know where she's getting those calories. Only when she's ready and willing to LOOK will she see.

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YOBETHIE 5/7/2012 3:21PM

    I am glad you will be there when your friend is ready to hear it!

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SONSHINE52 5/7/2012 1:47PM

   

WONDERFUL blog. I couldn't agree more.

Sue

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KANSASROSE67 5/7/2012 1:42PM

    Excellent blog...you are exactly right! I would be willing to bet she more like 1500 calories more than you...it is shocking to look up the value of fast foods.

Comment edited on: 5/7/2012 1:48:44 PM

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RICHILA 5/7/2012 12:56PM

    I know that I had no clue how many calories I ate per day until I started tracking on Sparkpeople. But, we know that the other half of that equation is a lack of movement. It is also not just how much, but what we are eating. I used to be hungry all the time-now eating better and less, I am usually satisfied. Actually, I can tell if I have overdone processed carbs-I will be starving after I eat. emoticon

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THE_NEW_MELISSA 5/7/2012 12:52PM

    You are exactly right. I don't think anybody has a real clue about how those calories add up until they start tracking. It's a real eye opener, but you have to commit to being completely honest.

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DARA52 5/7/2012 12:16PM

    Tracking is how I keep myself in line. Good reminder! Thanks!

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CAKEMAKERMOM 5/7/2012 11:52AM

    Some of it is not really knowing what the calorie count is in things. "It's just a smoothie, it's just fruit, right?" "That coffee shouldn't have that many calories." "French fries go with everything."

I hope she'll find someplace to put down what she really eats and finds out that milkshakes have more calories than what one person should have in a day. It's really an eye opener to see what you really are eating in a day, especially when the person normally drinks pop or something that's not water with every meal and snack.

Some people think that eating once a day is "not eating that much". When in all reality that one meal not only throws off the body, but can contain enough calories for a couple of days.

You did suggest this site for her? All you can do is lead the person, she has to do it by herself. If she's really serious, she'll look into the site.

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NATPLUMMER 5/7/2012 11:30AM

    You are spot on!!

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90 degrees on May 3?! What sort of wankery is this??!

Thursday, May 03, 2012

I had an early docket this morning, and then another case to handle, so planned on a bike ride this afternoon.

It's 90 degrees in the shade.

The heat stroke prevention information I've been reading says pretty consistently, "don't go out there and exercise in it."

I'm thinking that an indoor workout may be in order instead. And tomorrow morning go for an early bike ride.

Jumpin' Jezebels. It's only May 3.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

DANA48131 5/9/2012 1:19PM

    I live in Texas. I'm going to be biking when it is 110. Wanna come and join me? :)

I almost canceled my ride the other day when it was 95. However, I thought to myself, "If I don't do these rides now at 95, and then at 98, and then at 101, I'll have NO hope of being able to ride through July, August and September." So I did it. It wasn't really that bad, but I ride on the trails, under the trees, which helps, a LOT!

Whatever you do, just be safe. :)

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CHALLENGER15 5/5/2012 12:18PM

    I am already thinking I am going to have to go to morning walks! So very hot here in SW Missouri already...

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KATHYSCOLLIES 5/3/2012 10:17PM

    Hot and humid here today - so hot we actually closed everything up and turned on our central air, and every single fan in the house..... And just like you already said - It's only the 3rd of May!!!

This does not bode well for the summer weather conditions, I think!






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OPTIMIST1948 5/3/2012 10:01PM

    Send some here. I got used to warmer weather in a snap we had about a month ago, but it has returned to "seasonal" and now I'm cold. Send me about 10 or so degrees and I think we'll both be happier.

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DOTTIEJANE1 5/3/2012 4:07PM

    We are have HEAT INDEX 'S for the next several days we rarely have any until mid June .Kinda makes you wonder what is in store . Did indoor fitness today . STAY COOL .

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BLUE42DOWN 5/3/2012 3:46PM

    I don't know if you get weather like I do, but we get a small "heat wave" like that in spring and one in the fall, but it doesn't make the regular summer temperatures any worse. Hopefully it's a temporary heatwave - or you get quite used to those early early morning bike rides!

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CAKEMAKERMOM 5/3/2012 3:12PM

    In my state, if you don't like the weather, just wait a day. Glad you still have a workout plan!

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THE_NEW_MELISSA 5/3/2012 3:08PM

    Crazy weather this year!

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NATPLUMMER 5/3/2012 2:45PM

    Good idea....stay cool!!

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AMANDASHRINKING 5/3/2012 2:01PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon Got to love that summer heat

Comment edited on: 5/3/2012 2:01:35 PM

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Non-scale victories for the win

Tuesday, May 01, 2012

After a month of hard work, I found myself only 4 pounds lighter. I was quite frustrated.

But today I went to Dress Barn. Last summer I bought two dresses there in size 24. Today? I came home with a size 16.

I never thought I'd be a size 16 again.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

DANA48131 5/9/2012 1:16PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon

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CHALLENGER15 5/5/2012 12:17PM

    I love Dress Barn! Congrats on the smaller size! It feels great, doesn't it?

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EUPHRATES 5/2/2012 11:14PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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YULLABELLE 5/2/2012 2:31PM

    emoticon

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NATPLUMMER 5/2/2012 1:05PM

    4 pounds is awesome!! and so is size 16!!! emoticon

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KARENDEE4 5/2/2012 9:24AM

    WOO HOO

That is great!!!

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LULUBELLE65 5/2/2012 6:55AM

    That's fabulous! I find that how clothing fits is a much better indicator of how well you are doing than the scale.

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APPLESBANANAS 5/2/2012 5:26AM

    !!! That is awesome!!! Yessss!

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BLUE42DOWN 5/2/2012 3:23AM

    emoticon

emoticon on such a great victory and a timely reminder that you are continuing to make progress on your journey all the time!

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KITALYST 5/2/2012 2:33AM

    That is awesome! Many congrats to you!

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KATHYSCOLLIES 5/1/2012 11:46PM

    That's really, really , REALLY emoticon emoticon emoticon !!!

I so thrilled that you are seeing such a big difference in the sizes. After all the hard work that you've been doing, you definitely deserve this!

Hugs,
Kathy

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BJUMPINGFORJOY 5/1/2012 10:31PM

    That is wonderful. Keep up the great work.

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CAKEMAKERMOM 5/1/2012 9:56PM

    emoticon emoticon

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OPTIMIST1948 5/1/2012 9:41PM

    Rejoicing!

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30 Days of Biking: the final day

Monday, April 30, 2012

So how to finish out biking all 30 days of 30 Days of Biking? Why, by biking 30 miles, of course! Actually, by the time I got home it was 31 miles, but I did it! I am completely wiped out, but I did it.

At about 22 miles, I started getting really tired, and the miles seemed to be taking much longer even though I was still moving at the same speed. At 25 miles, the wind changed direction and blasted me with a 10-degree temperature drop--I was glad then that I'd thrown a sweatshirt into my bag! When I got to the final hill, I thought, "I have nothing left. I am gonna have to walk it." But I figured that as long as I was pedaling more than 4 miles an hour it was faster than walking, and by gum I made it all the way up.

My arms are more sore than my legs at this point, and I fear what tomorrow will feel like. But I did it!!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

YULLABELLE 5/2/2012 2:32PM

    emoticon You are emoticon

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HONBAD 4/30/2012 10:17PM

    Wow!! That's awesome! What an accomplishment!

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OPTIMIST1948 4/30/2012 9:51PM

    Totally Awesome work!

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NATPLUMMER 4/30/2012 8:03PM

    Awesome!! How does your butt feel?

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COLEENCOLE 4/30/2012 7:20PM

    You must be in great shape.

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CAKEMAKERMOM 4/30/2012 6:59PM

    That's great you were able to finish off the goal you set for yourself!

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BREAKINGOUT 4/30/2012 6:56PM

    Congratulations! Your sense soreness will remind you of how proud you can be of your own efforts, and how far you've come! I'm very proud of you!

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The weightloss fairy just doesn't do her job

Monday, April 30, 2012

I went to a convention this weekend. This is an event hubby and I attend every year, and one where we see lots of friends we only get to see once or twice a year. It was tremendous fun.

It's also a place where there are calorie traps galore. The convention suite is always filled with candy, chips, sugary beverages, and other snack foods. The evenings see lots of parties with lots and lots of drinking. Eating out is unavoidable and often at places with tons of "comfort food" choices.

I was SO GOOD at this con. The only things I ate in the con suite were a banana on Friday (they ran out after that, boo) and half a peanut butter sandwich for breakfast on Sunday morning. I made good food choices at almost every meal (one food court Chinese was pretty much unavoidable because of time constraints). I didn't drink at the parties. I kept myself hydrated. I politely turned down proffered homemade goodies. I was a SAINT. I even got up early on Saturday morning and worked out.

So why is the scale UP two pounds this morning?! Oh, I know that my ring is a but tighter, indicating water weight. But shouldn't there be some kind of benevolent weightloss fairy who, seeing us turn away so many temptations, waves her magic wand and lipos away a couple pounds?! I'm not asking for some 10-pound reward here, just a little positive reinforcement!

Then I remember what DIDN'T happen. I didn't use con weekend as an excuse to eat junk, or to slack off my workout. I didn't use everyone else's eating as a reason for me to do the same. So what I accomplished was that I didn't gain 5 pounds.

The water weight will come back off. I still want the weightloss fairy, but it's good to know I can do this on my own.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

BREAKINGOUT 4/30/2012 7:03PM

    I always carry water weight after I travel. Makes me think twice for making many trips. I don't know what causes it, but I've identified it as traveling. Your reward for being soooo good will be there when the excess fluids are gone! Kudos!

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BLUE42DOWN 4/30/2012 2:46PM

    emoticon

I had two thoughts with that. Either 1) the poor benevolent weight loss fairy has to do something with all the pounds she takes, so she's currently on vacation at a spa trying to get them off her body OR 2) there's also a wicked weight gain fairy who is much more diligent at her job and has the poor benevolent weight loss fairy locked up in a cellar somewhere waiting for a prince to rescue her.

I've been reading Grimm's Fairy Tales lately. Does it show?

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NATPLUMMER 4/30/2012 2:18PM

    emoticon emoticon
Yes, the water weight will come off. You did fab!!

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EUPHRATES 4/30/2012 1:54PM

    My guess is the Chinese - it doesn't matter HOW good my choices are the rest of the week, if I have Chinese I blow up like a balloon every time (which SUCKS since lo mein is probably my favorite food evar). I've learned to be VERY deliberate about when I indulge and just expect the consequences (which is why I'm thinking about treating myself Saturday night - I expect MOST people consider "carb loading" before a marathon a reason to go to Olive Garden, but my first thought was "OMG I'm going to be in lo mein heaven!" LOL

I had the same thing happen at Con on the Cob last year, even though they had a constant supply of crudite in the con suite (of course, partying with Barfleet probably had a little to do with that, and when Barfleet is there, the party is ON baybee). :)

Any way we can tempt you guys into Origins???????
emoticon

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HONBAD 4/30/2012 1:27PM

    emoticon

You should feel amazing with all those healthy choices you made for yourself! It is hard to see the increase, even when you're full aware that it's water weight. I don't know how often you weigh in but maybe next time give yourself a few days to get that water weight gone so you don't have to deal with any negative thoughts at all! I have a cruise coming up in June and I'm thinking of having my husband hide my scale for at least 3 days afterwards so I don't have to deal with it!

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AMANDASHRINKING 4/30/2012 10:24AM

    send her this way when she starts doing her job

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OPTIMIST1948 4/30/2012 10:19AM

    GOOD FOR YOU! Its hard to be a saint in a den of sin, but you were. It *will* come off.

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