MISSDAISY23   77,222
60,000-79,999 SparkPoints
MISSDAISY23's Recent Blog Entries

Disorder in the Court

Saturday, October 06, 2012

These are from a book called Disorder in the Court. These are things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and now published by court reporters - who had the torment of staying calm while these exchanges were actually taking place.

Q: Are you sexually active?
A: No, I just lie there.

Q: What is your date of birth?
A: July fifteenth.
Q: What year?
A: Every year.

Q: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?
A: Gucci sweats and Reeboks.

Q: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?
A: Yes.
Q: And in what ways does it affect your memory?
A: I forget.
Q: You forget. Can you give us an example of something that you've forgotten?

Q: How old is your son, the one living with you?
A: Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can't remember which.
Q: How long has he lived with you?
A: Forty-five years.

Q: What was the first thing your husband said to you when he woke up that morning?
A: He said, "Where am I, Cathy?"
Q: And why did that upset you?
A: My name is Susan.

Q: Do you know if your daughter has ever been involved in voodoo or the occult?
A: We both do.
Q: Voodoo?
A: We do.
Q: You do?
A: Yes, voodoo.

Q: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning?

Q: The youngest son, the twenty-year old, how old is he?

Q: Were you present when your picture was taken?

Q: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th?
A: Yes.
Q: And what were you doing at that time?

Q: She had three children, right?
A: Yes.
Q: How many were boys?
A: None.
Q: Were there any girls?

Q: How was your first marriage terminated?
A: By death.
Q: And by whose death was it terminated?

Q: Can you describe the individual?
A: He was about medium height and had a beard.
Q: Was this a male, or a female?

Q: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition notice, which I sent to your attorney?
A: No, this is how I dress when I go to work.

Q: Doctor, how many autopsies have you performed on dead people?
A: All my autopsies are performed on dead people.

Q: All your responses must be oral, OK? What school did you go to?
A: Oral.

Q: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?
A: The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m.
Q: And Mr. Dennington was dead at the time?
A: No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was doing an Autopsy.

Q: Are you qualified to give a urine sample?

Q: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?
A: No.
Q: Did you check for blood pressure?
A: No.
Q: Did you check for breathing?
A: No.
Q: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?
A: No.
Q: How can you be so sure, Doctor?
A: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.
Q: But could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?
A: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law somewhere.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

PATRICIAANN46 10/7/2012 4:33PM

  emoticon I emoticon ed them!!!

Report Inappropriate Comment

    I am going to have to share this with a couple of my email friends.
Thanks for sharing these smiles and gaw-phaws with Sparkers.

Report Inappropriate Comment
Q8PRINCESS 10/6/2012 11:18PM


Report Inappropriate Comment
EWL978 10/6/2012 10:14PM

    Thanx, I needed that!! emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
LYNNA1968 10/6/2012 10:08PM

    OMG I absolutely love the autopsy ones,

Report Inappropriate Comment
ELRIDDICK 10/6/2012 10:01PM

  Thanks for sharing

Report Inappropriate Comment

The Idealist Photo 4

Friday, October 05, 2012

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

PATRICIAANN46 10/6/2012 5:46PM


Report Inappropriate Comment

    Good thought to remember.
Thank you for sharing.

Report Inappropriate Comment

The Idealist Photo 3

Thursday, October 04, 2012

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:


    Very good advise!

Report Inappropriate Comment
Q8PRINCESS 10/5/2012 7:38AM


Think - that's the hard part!

Report Inappropriate Comment

The Idealist Photo 2

Wednesday, October 03, 2012

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

PATRICIAANN46 10/5/2012 6:41PM

  How very true that is!!!!! Have a great weekend....... emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment

    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon
I agree... So True !!

Report Inappropriate Comment
JUDYAMK 10/4/2012 2:02PM

    Oh how true this is. I have already made so many family dinners that as I was washing dishes & putting all the leftovers away some would go in the room or sit at the table talking to me & never once helped . I washed & dried, put all things away. I could never ever go any where & not help.I had an Aunt that was not a good housekeeper, she would sit at the kitchen table having coffee as I was washing clothes, doing dishes ,vacuuming, washing wood work down & never helped. I just could not stand her house like that.That was years ago when I was younger, she still talks about me doing her work & laughs & said I was always a good girl. She had 4 children a husband & she said she hated house work,& still does.Well I grew up & let her do her own now!!!!

Report Inappropriate Comment
Q8PRINCESS 10/4/2012 8:25AM


Report Inappropriate Comment
FATHINSN 10/4/2012 3:48AM

    Oh, wow. sort of true for real life, eh?

Report Inappropriate Comment

Find out what my daughter is excited about for today

Tuesday, October 02, 2012

Went for 30 minute walk this morning with my iPod.

Took daughter for her Tae Kwon Do class at Peak Sports Club. She got a red tape on her yellow belt for strikes and blocks today! Was on treadmill for 30 minutes while she was in her class.

Today, her school has McTeacher Night. It's the school fundraiser night, hence, we had McDonald's for dinner. I had a grilled chicken wrap and a side salad. I feel very tired again. Guess I better go to bed soon.

Hope everyone have had a good day!


  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

LYNNA1968 10/4/2012 7:53PM

    glad to hear lol well see you both enjoyed your time there. High five on grilled chicken emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
PATRICIAANN46 10/4/2012 5:28PM

  YOU continue to do a very good job of eating healthy. emoticon

And......... emoticon job emoticon to your daughter.

Report Inappropriate Comment
FATHINSN 10/4/2012 3:49AM

    I would love to have McTeacher night like hers, hehe. Alas, I was in a boarding school and our favourite best dish was fried chicken LOL

Report Inappropriate Comment
Q8PRINCESS 10/3/2012 8:33AM


emoticon to your daughter.

Report Inappropriate Comment
Q8PRINCESS 10/3/2012 8:33AM


emoticon to your daughter.

Report Inappropriate Comment

    It is great when we are so active during our day that our bodies are truly ready for sleep at night.
A McTeacher night? How does that work? The local McD donates a portion of its sales to the school fund?

Report Inappropriate Comment
KAYE454 10/2/2012 11:36PM

  good for you

Report Inappropriate Comment

First Page  1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 51 52 53 54 55 56 57 58 59 60 61 62 63 64 65 Last Page