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Blows up yer skirt

Thursday, September 06, 2012

Whatever blows up yer skirt...

The Englishman's wife steps up to the tee and, as she bends over to place her ball, a gust of wind blows her skirt up and reveals her lack of underwear.

"Good God, woman! Why aren't you wearing any knickers?" her husband demanded. "Well, you don't give me enough housekeeping money to afford any."

The Englishman immediately reaches into his pocket and says, "For the sake of decency, here's £50. Go and buy yourself some underwear."

Next, the Irishman's wife bends over to set her ball on the tee. Her skirt also blows up to show that she is wearing no undies.

"Blessed Virgin Mary, woman! You've no knickers. Why not?"

She replies, "I can't afford any on the money you give me."

He reaches into his pocket and says, "For the sake of decency, here's £20. Go and buy yourself some underwear!"

Lastly, the Scotsman's wife bends over. The wind also takes her skirt over her head to reveal that she, too, is naked under it.

"Sweet mudder of Jesus, Aggie! Where the frig are yer drawers?"

She too explains, You dinna give me enough money ta be able ta affarrd any."

The Scotsman reaches into his pocket and says, "Well, fer the love 'o Jasus, 'n the sake of decency, here's a comb. Tidy yerself up a bit."

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

PATRICIAANN46 9/7/2012 5:08PM


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Q8PRINCESS 9/6/2012 11:23PM


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What a busy day!

Wednesday, September 05, 2012

Daughter’s school called just before 7:00am this morning to announce that today is a “No School Day.” When they say no school, I thought it is not winter so there is no snow. Are we getting a tornado is my next thought. School has power outage due to the severe thunderstorms. Last night, the severe thunderstorms started around 9:45pm and winds were like 60 mph.

Still have to wake daughter up because I have a doctor’s appointment. It is a follow-up appointment and everything is good. My weight went up one pound and my doctor said that is good. Daughter played with two young kids whilst waiting for me.

The doctor’s office is located right opposite my daughter’s former home day care. They treat her like family and she wanted to see how they are doing. I had a good time catching up there even though there is a couple of bad news. Her hubby lost his job and their dog is at the Vet’s. Daughter had a good time playing with the two young ones. Before we left, I wish her hubby good luck in his job search. Also, Xander (their dog) will have a speedy recovery from whatever he has caught.

We got home and went for my 30 minute walk with daughter riding her bike. As we were almost reaching home, we met this lady in our neighborhood. We started chatting and then we discovered we worked for the same company. We do not see each other because I was in the main office while she was at one of the offsite. She gave me her card and we are planning to meet up for walks or lunches. Daughter was playing with her little cute dog named Tinker Bell.

We arrived home around 12:30pm. It is a good thing I had leftovers for lunch.

Took daughter to Peak Sports Club for her Tae Kwon Do class. Go on the treadmill for 30 minutes. I had Arby’s Roast Turkey Salad for dinner tonight. Well, I am tired now. Hope everyone have had a fabulous day!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

FATHINSN 9/11/2012 8:58PM

    Yup, quite a busy day! But I think you handled the day well and you had your daughter for the day compare to when she goes to school :D

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EMERALDGREEN1 9/6/2012 3:12AM

    B z s a b! Glad ur health is ok. Also glad ur storm is over. Must be scary when it's about!

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Q8PRINCESS 9/5/2012 11:38PM

    There seems to be more sever thunder showers this year. It seems the weather was much worse than other years.

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PATRICIAANN46 9/5/2012 9:40PM

  We had the same storms you had last night. Lots of power outages due to the high winds.......
You really did have a busy day. I am glad that your Dr. appt. went well and it sounds like you and your daughter enjoyed being together. I had two sons and always wished that I would have had a daughter too. A mother-daughter relationship is so nice to have. I am very close to my Mom and we still do lots together even though her health has slowed her down. We just adjust to what she CAN do.
Have a good evening.

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ANNESYLVIA 9/5/2012 9:08PM

    Yes, that was a busy day! I got a lot done today too...but it would have never happen if my kids did not start school today. LOL

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Highlight of the day is… Part 2

Tuesday, September 04, 2012

Last Saturday, September 1, 2012, my daughter found a dove in our backyard. The dove’s right wing was damaged probably by one of the cats in our neighborhood. Charlie (daughter named dove) is doing fine now. She has been eating and drinking. The following day hubby hung the bird cage from the ceiling. She feels more at ease now that she can look down at us. We have been talking to her. Not only we are observing her, she has been watching us too.

We wanted to get Charlie a companion. The House of Birds owner advised us that it would be better off by itself. One reason being we do not know the sex of the bird. The other reason is it will bond with the other bird and not us.

When my hubby was a kid, the same thing happened to him. He found a pigeon in the neighborhood and asked his Dad to help the poor pigeon with a damaged wing. His Dad had immobilized the wing and pigeon got well and was able to fly again. They let the pigeon out of its cage to free it. The pigeon (hubby named it Timmy) flew up to a wire, sat there for awhile then went back into its cage again. Timmy stayed with hubby’s family in California. When hubby’s family moved back to Illinois, Timmy moved with them. Later on, hubby found out that Timmy is a female because she laid an egg! Timmy passed after more than 10 years with the family.

My daughter loves animals. She said when she grows up she wants to rescue and take care of the less fortunate animals. Maybe she will become a Vet someday. My daughter is happy that Charlie is safe now from the outside world. Hubby tells her, “Your dream came true! You have always wanted a pet.” She said, “Yes, but I wish Charlie did not have a damaged wing.”

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

FATHINSN 9/5/2012 9:43AM

    Such touching stories, both your daughter's and hubby's. Years ago, I found a bird with damaged body (can't remember whether wings or some other parts) and of course, one of our cats did that - you know how cats like to play with their prey before eat them. I tried to save the bird but it kept flying away from me (or at least, trying to fly) and at same time, trying to shoo away my cat. Unfortunately, the cat somehow got an opportunity to sneak around me and caught the bird again and there was nothing left I can do after that :( It was sad so that was my last time trying to save birds caught by my cats - I always seconds too late! I wanted to get so angry with my cat but it was their natures - my cats can even get distracted by geckos when I gave them food..

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Q8PRINCESS 9/4/2012 10:38PM

    I was also thinking that she might be an up and coming vet when I was reading your blog.

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EMERALDGREEN1 9/4/2012 10:34PM

    Tell Felicia everything happens for a reason. Maybe Charlie was sent to her care by way of a damaged wing. The Lord works in mysterious ways.

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Bear Hunting

Monday, September 03, 2012

A country preacher decided to skip services one Sunday and head to the hills to do some bear hunting. As he rounded the corner on a perilous twist in the trail, he and a bear collided, sending him and his rifle tumbling down the mountainside. Before he knew it, his rifle went one way and he went the other, landing on a rock and breaking both legs.

That was the good news. The bad news was that the ferocious bear was charging at him from a distance, and he couldn’t move. “Oh, Lord,” the preacher prayed, “I’m so sorry for skipping services today to come out here and hunt. Please forgive me and grant me just one wish: Please make a Christian out of that bear that’s coming at me. Please, Lord!”

That very instant the bear skidded to a halt, fell to his knees, clasped its paws together and began to pray aloud right at the preacher’s feet, “Dear God, bless this food I am about to receive…”

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

FATHINSN 9/5/2012 9:45AM

    I think the preacher should pray something else, hehe.

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PAMNANGEL 9/4/2012 1:10AM

    emoticonBe careful what you wish for!

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Q8PRINCESS 9/3/2012 11:40PM


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PATRICIAANN46 9/3/2012 11:15PM


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LINDA7668 9/3/2012 8:24PM

    I love it!

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MAGGIEVAN 9/3/2012 8:23PM

    Ha-ha, very funny. Thanks for sharing.

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April Fool

Sunday, September 02, 2012

Defense Attorney: What is your age?

Little old Woman: I am 86 years old.

Defense Attorney: Will you tell us, in your own words, what happened to you?

Little old Woman: There I was, sitting there in my swing on my front porch on a warm spring evening, when a young man comes creeping up on the porch and sat down beside me.

Defense Attorney: Did you know him?

Little old Woman: No, but he sure was friendly.

Defense Attorney: What happened after he sat down?

Little old Woman: He started to rub my thigh.

Defense Attorney: Did you stop him?

Little old Woman: No, I didn't stop him.

Defense Attorney: Why not?

Little old Woman: It felt good. Nobody had done that since my Abner passed away some 30 years ago.

Defense Attorney: What happened next?

Little old Woman: He began to rub my breasts.

Defense Attorney: Did you stop him then?

Little old Woman: No, I did not stop him.

Defense Attorney: Why not?

Little old Woman: Why, Your Honor, his rubbing made me feel all alive and excited. I haven't felt that good in years!

Defense Attorney: What happened next?

Little old Woman: Well, I was feeling so spicy that I just laid down and said to him..."Take me ...young man...Take me!"

Defense Attorney: Did he take you?

Little old Woman: Hell, no. He just yelled, "April Fool!" ...And that's when I shot the little bastard!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

Q8PRINCESS 9/3/2012 11:39PM


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PATRICIAANN46 9/3/2012 11:14PM


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SUNSHINE65 9/2/2012 11:59PM

    Oh, that is rich!

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KARIDIAN1 9/2/2012 9:42PM


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    HA HA HEH HEE thanks for the laugh

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