Friday, April 27, 2012
I'm slowly getting my spark back. Apologies if you've been reading my downer posts and wondered why I was posting if I couldn't say anything nice at all. :D And Thanks to everyone who's made it through reading them and still been able to have encouraging and supportive things to say. I really appreciate it so much. I love this community here on spark and I don't know where I would be without all of you (well, I know where I'd be...but I digress) :D I just felt like I needed to get everything out so I could focus on moving forward! And it seems to be working.
It's been a while since I've done one of these, and I feel it's about time!!! I've had a good week. spark-wise. for me. lately... :D So I'm finally feeling like posting one of these that isn't full of Jeers. :D YAY!
I've tracked my food Mon-Fri this week, huge accomplishment given my recent lacking in this area!
Ate within range 3 out of 5 days this week!
Worked out 3 out of 5 days this week, also huge given my recent track record!
I've stood up at work 3 out of 5 days, not bad also for myself recently
- note: these weren't on all the same 3 days :D although 2 were... I started the week off strong on Monday and Tuesday!
Joined the 'Spring into Shape Bootcamp Challenge'!
Earned enough points to spin the bonus wheel 5 out of 5 days!!! WOOT!
I didn't let more personal drama during the week take away from the big picture.
Had a meatless Thursday dinner(couldn't think of a catchy name) because I missed all the days with good catchy names -and didn't go all day bcs lunch was wed night's leftovers which had chicken, doh! :D I'm NOT counting the whole day as a Jeer!!
Wednesday and Thursday were great days for water intake! I exceeded my goals on those day, working on it today.
I have issues with the 2 little days known as the weekend
I let allergies and mood get the best of me in the middle of the week and sat down at my desk, and didn't work out on Wed or Thurs.
Can't seem to go one day without a diet root beer! :(
Monday and Tuesday I don't think I drank ANY water.
Fill up my water bottles every day this weekend (and into next week) for maximum water consumption. I always do better getting it in when I tote it around with me.
5 Freggies a Day
Wear FitBit every day to see where I'm at Steps-a-day wise
Make Breakfast bars or healthy bkfst cookies this weekend for grab and go during the week, GET OUT OF THE PACKAGED BAR RUT. Even if they're Kashi and all natural it doesn't mean that it's good for me to eat every freakin' day. I know this. I need to make a better way. Incorporate bananas, more fruit.
Make pot o' soup for lunches during the week.
Continue to do challenge work even tomorrow and the next days (the days I like to forget, aka: the weekend)
Take beginning WMS pic to go along with the Spring Bootcamp Challenge... IN bathing suit. ... kinda scared about that one!
Hoop EVERY DAY! I love it, so MAKE the time! If I feel like I'm not getting a workout, just keep doing it because I need the practice until I can count it as a workout... kinda like job training: sometimes I have to put in extra hours to learn a new language until I can actually code in it and get paid for it.
Keep up the 3x a week for tracking everything next week. Hopefully I will exceed my wildest dreams with this one, and do it every day, but I'll say 3 because that is something I know I can achieve.
Print this out and check it off/remind myself during the week!
Make more napkins and kitchen towels! Work on quilt-a-long quilt... do SOMETHING crafty.
Do something creative every day... as in, go through that craft closet and declutter, and as you're doing that creatively use or discard items. STILL need to keep decluttering!
Clean the house following the chart I made 3 out of 5 nights. (Oh I have stuff written down for every day, but I cannot shoot for perfection here, just bare minimum for now!)
It's going to be a GREAT weekend, and a GREAT week ahead!
Monday, April 23, 2012
Life is full of stuff, good, bad, ugly. I (kinda) moved on from one personal drama (ok, really I think of it as trauma) to the next. The next being last week my car was in the shop and my grandmother was put in the hospital. She's still there. In the midst of all of this, thankfully the only time my son is deciding to cooperate are our daily visits with Oma in the hospital. The rest of the time all bets are off. He's testing his limits (and mine, and my husband's) to the max. I know this is a part of his growth but it is so stressful. It's enough to drive a gal crazy! We've planned a date night for next weekend already. But THIS is life. THIS is the stuff that I'll look back on, good or bad, and I want my response to be one that I can look back on without regret. As I read through other SPeep's blog posts, catching snippets of their lives that they want to share, I am inspired by how people can persevere and stay true to their health and goals through, it seems, just about anything. Even if 'staying true' is logging on here, blogging, just doing whatever needs to be done until more can be done. I'm slowly coming around to the ACTUAL realization (not just as factual or passive) that changing my lifestyle needs to be a lifetime commitment. The good I can do for my body and my family can stay with me for the rest of my life. I have an opportunity to be healthier, happier, and outrun zombies should the zompocolypse occur.
Hooping is going to be a fun way to help me reach my goals (mainly of being happy and having fun). I haven't figured out yet if a hoop could be used as weapon in the zom-end-times scenario... but I do know that I'm pretty terrible at it right now! I need serious practice! I'm going to be on the beginning-level dvd for a while I think. Also, I'm super happy for all the resources listed on the Hoopers All-Stars group, because I need any and all help I can get!!! Waist hooping is really, pretty much, all I can do so far. :D Hopefully I'll get the hang of it. I DO love the beginning of something when everything is a new challenge. I love to learn so this makes me happy... I have A LOT to learn. :D
I use my crafting as a way of keeping busy, and not eating, so I like to share my craft projects here (it's not fitness activity but it makes me happy, and I'm TERRIBLE at gardening, so I'm more likely to share these craft successes than my gardening endeavors) :D. In honor of Earth Day this weekend I made some paper towel replacements (you can also see my blue hoop in the background):
tutorial I used here: www.sewastraightline.com/2010/04/rol
My family has a paper towel addiction. I usually blame my hubby, but the fact is since he buys them and they're in the house, I use them too. Growing up we RARELY used paper towels. I'd like to get back to that. So I made a fabric roll, my husband LOVES them and I plan on making many more. We also use paper towels for napkins during meal times (I know, I know!) so I'm going to be making napkins in a similar way I made the towels. It kills me that the 2 yards of fabric (the 1 yard of flannel I liked and the 1 yard of terry cloth) cost less than the giant package of paper towels my hubby likes to buy at Sam's (don't ask how long that package lasts, there's a reason I'm alarmed and we're trying to take measures to step away from the paper!).
Lately, due to the personal drama I've been feeling really low. Now that things are getting back to "normal", including my hormones, I am more ready than ever to be feeling good about myself again. The exercise in the morning helps, and I've started walking up all the stairs to work again (I started a couple weeks ago with just taking the stairs half way up). My determination was tested this morning when birds dive bombed me on my way to the second set of stairs! I think I'll be going through the parking garage to get to the rest of the stairs! At least until spring is over. Those birds scared me!!!
Keep going even when birds get in the way! :D Happy Monday!!!
Wednesday, April 11, 2012
Lately things haven't been GREAT with me. But I'm feeling I'm definitely on the way out of my gloom and ready to get back to my routine. Yesterday I had a doctors appt. and I'm up even MORE than my last follow up (I'm going to wait until I weigh in on Saturday to change my weight here). grrr. On the plus side, my blood pressure was terrific! So, that was the one good thing. But seeing the high number on their scale made me realize for all my talk on my last blog post, FOR REAL I needed to actually start getting back to it and stop feeling sorry for myself already!!!It has been taking baby steps to get me to the point where I'm fed up with baby steps! I'm ready to start... walking (hehe!) Last night, instead of stressing out about things I'd like to nag my husband about (hehe, that is totally what I did the night before! oops!) I put in one of my new workout video games. I got the EA Sports Active 2 that's been out for quite a while now, so the price has gone down (especially since people are flocking to the kinect...I know I want to too, but I'm striving to be happy with what I have.). It's a good thing I did it during a time that I don't usually set aside for exercise. Usually that window is pretty small, it's like 30 minutes, 45 minutes MAX since I try to fit it in before I get ready in the morning. The total time to set up the game and do the first workout was an hour and half. The official time for the workout was 24 to 25 minutes... but because every exercise was new to me in the game i had to do the tutorial and I marched between each one while it was loading. So I like everything about the game except for that. When there's 28 activities, and each one takes like a minute to load between them, that effectively doubles the time of a stated 25 minute workout (ok, so a full minute might be too much, but seriously, even 30 seconds added between each one adds up to a lot of time that I don't have in the morning!). sooo.... I'm not sure if that's going to get better. I really like the game otherwise. I can't imagine getting up any earlier... but I do like to set my alarm for 4:45 and then it takes me another 10 minutes to ACTUALLY get out of bed, so I may need to be more disciplined and get out of bed when the alarm goes off! Or I could do that game when I have more time, and do the dvds when I have less. I've done both of the dvds now (the Spark 28 day and the Leslie Sansone 5 day plan) and I love both of them. Soon I will have a HOOP! But I plan on doing that after I get home from work and want to feel like playing (like family dance party) before I cook dinner.
Ok, so I'm feeling great about yesterday. OOOH! Also had to move Meatless Monday to Turkey-less Tuesday (?!) this week and made these AHHHMAZING sandwiches. I can't believe my husband wanted one. I figured he'd just make a ham sandwich with Easter leftovers. Ok, it sounds weird, but here goes:
make some guacamole by mashing up an avocado (or 2 if you have more people eating), adding the juice of a lime, garlic powder to taste (I'm VERY generous with it, ha!), some cilantro and/or parsley if you've got it (fresh if you have it), some salt to taste. Toast 2 slices of bread (for one sandwich), put a slice of monterrey jack cheese on one side, some sliced tomatoes on top of that, and a thin layer of the guacamole on the other slice. Put it together and enjoy. It sounds WEIRD! But it was sooo good. I actually got the idea from a meal planning website, but it called for it to be like a grilled cheese. I don't like to dirty up more dishes than I have to (plus I'd rather toast than grill it in butter!)!
Today I'll do the Spark Desk Workout. I'm still standing, looking at the old post the other day I realized that I've been doing this for about a year now! I'm still loving it (most days!) and I'm hoping that getting back up will help me feel like a fighter again, instead of a moaper :D I need to focus on drinking more water today. I've gotten back to making it my goal to get enough points to be able to spin the bonus wheel, something I haven't had as a goal since probably some time in the fall. At that point it was natural so it stopped being a goal because it was a habit. Lately it has NOT been a habit. So, I'm back to square one. :D Every day, one foot in front of the other. Things are looking up!
Friday, April 06, 2012
I had a horrible thought as I was working out with one of my new exercise videos this morning. My train of thought went something like this:
"Man, I really love this video. I'm pretty sure these 2 dvds and numerous exercise games I have makes me an expert on workout videos. My mom needs to have this dvd. UH OH... I've become one of "THOSE" people. OH NO! I have a collection of workout videos I have a history of yo-yo dieting! I'm going to blow it all and binge and cling to these videos while I delude myself into thinking everything is ok."
Let me be clear. I have 2 videos I JUST bought, and while I do have a small collection of workout video games (so I may know something about what makes a good game FOR ME) I'm pretty sure this in no way makes me an expert. Also, my brain really does know that losing weight nearly 10 years ago now (with the help of weight watchers over a nearly 2 year period) combined with my efforts NOW to get healthy does not mean I yo-yo diet. My rational brain knows this. I started thinking "Oh no. All these videos and equipment, this is NOT the kind of person I wanted to be!". And then I'm all "Really? Cause I thought I just wanted to be healthy. Who cares about the details? If I need some exercise equipment and dvds to exercise because I don't go to a gym then so what?! It's not like I don't use them." Yes, I really did have this conversation with myself this morning, while doing Leslie Sansone's crazy (but fun!) workout. So I asked myself, well what kind of healthy person did I envision myself being? My answer was, "I want to be skinny, I want to not have to wear a bra. I want it to be effortless...I just WANT to be skinny and healthy and be able to rock climb when I want to and have fun and just BE, without worrying about food or exercise." Seriously. The no bra wearing aside (Um, I haven't been able to do that since before puberty... so I'm pretty sure there's just NO way that is ever going to happen for me), this is just ridiculous. I can't be that person. I like food too much for one thing, and I'll never be able to be healthy without exercising my body. It just doesn't work that way! I don't have a physical enough job to be able to not exercise - I do try with the standing up all day, but still, that is a very small thing I can do. And I don't play hard enough when I'm not working to not exercise.
My vision for the person I want to be is a fantasy.
I didn't choose to be forest ranger (I was THIS close to going to college in Alaska to try and do just that), my profession is one where I am locked to a computer. The very, VERY best I can hope for is that I'll be able to convince my boss at some point in the future to let me install a treadmill under my standing workstation. I'll probably be able to finally do this right before I retire. In the meantime my reality is that I HAVE to set aside time for formal exercise. I HAVE to care about what and how much I put into my body. I have to do these things so that when I do start rock climbing recreationally (or whatever sport I decide to get into!) I have the energy and strength to start. Man I love rock climbing.
To sum up this whole ramble I learned something very important about myself this morning. I learned that apparently I really do want something that is ridiculous and unattainable. And as ridiculous as that sounds for me not to have known that, it's true. I always figured I was a realist who KNEW that trying to look like a super model was unattainable and KNEW that people who make things look effortless are actually, probably, working very hard for that. I am fighting my inner self who wants something that is NEVER going to happen. That little voice that tells me it's ok to sleep in, or eat a second helping of something non-vegetable, or that soda and pizza for breakfast are perfectly acceptable is a part of that conspiracy. I need to want a new vision for my bad-*ss future. I need it to include the mundane. :) I need it to include a room full of exercise equipment and dvds and games that I use. I need to let go of my fear of becoming my grandmother who was a different size every time I saw her (every few years or so) and really and truly did yo-yo and crash diet and obsess about being small much more than being healthy (which I'm pretty sure never EVER crossed her mind). I am NOT that person, I will never be that person. I do, obviously, struggle with weight issues, but I hope that I try to work through my issues so I can move on to living a life I can be proud of.
Apologies if this was confusing or hard to understand. My writing skillz are not the best, I know. I just wanted to put it out there because I still can't believe I actually had this revelation this morning. I may have only worked out for 20 minutes, but I got a lot worked out! Plus I'm standing up again today! It's been a while!
As an aside: Here's a post I did about my standing workstation: www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_jo
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