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Love your computer????

Tuesday, July 08, 2014




Don't know if this ever really happened but thought it was great and had to share. Many of us can relate!!!!



At a recent computer expo (COMDEX), Bill Gates reportedly compared the computer industry with the auto industry and stated, "If Ford had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving $25 cars that got 1,000 miles to the gallon."

In response to Bill's comments, Ford issued a press release stating :

If Ford had developed technology like Microsoft, we would all be driving cars with the following characteristics (and I just love this):

1. For no reason whatsoever, your car would crash.........twice a day.

2.. Every time they repainted the lines in the road, you would have to buy a new car.

3... Occasionally your car would die on the freeway for no reason. You would have to pull to the side of the road, close all of the windows, shut off the car, restart it, and reopen the windows before you could continue. For some reason you would simply accept this.

4.... Occasionally, executing a maneuver such as a left turn would cause your car to shut down and refuse to restart, in which case you would have to reinstall the engine.

5..... Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun, was reliable, five times as fast and twice as easy to drive - but would run on only five percent of the roads.

6...... The oil, water temperature, and alternator warning lights would all be replaced by a single "This Car Has Performed An Illegal Operation" warning light.

I love the next one!

7....... The airbag system would ask, "Are you sure?" before deploying.

8........ Occasionally, for no reason whatsoever, your car would lock you out and refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted the door handle, turned the key and grabbed hold of the radio antenna.

9......... Every time a new car was introduced car buyers would have to learn how to drive all over again because none of the controls would operate in the same manner as the old car.

10.......... You'd have to press the "Start" button to turn the engine off.



Please share this with your friends who love - but sometimes hate - their computer!



emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon



emoticon Mary Anne

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

ARTJAC 7/9/2014 2:17AM

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OPALMOON 7/9/2014 12:48AM

    Brilliant!

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KAYDE53 7/8/2014 11:55PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon

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MOMMA_BEAR_69 7/8/2014 10:23PM

    Thank you for sharing and making me laugh tonight!!! AWESOME, VERY TRUE, and SO VERY, VERY FUNNY!!!
Blessings and hugs,
Helen

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EABL81 7/8/2014 10:23PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon

Oh, too funny! And too true!!!

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~KINDREDSPIRIT~ 7/8/2014 9:55PM

    cute.

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CHACHAOREO 7/8/2014 8:34PM

    emoticon

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MARIWELL 7/8/2014 6:21PM

    So funny and so true! Loved it!
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OVERACTIVEELBOW 7/8/2014 6:11PM

    Keep the chuckles coming.

emoticon Just finished supper and I am so uncomfortable... Only had good for me stuff but I must have stuffed too much good stuff into my tummy. Ah, well. maybe I will learn... one of these days.
A shower came through this afternoon, now it is getting muggy once again. At least it isn't snowing or icy out there ! !
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PHOENIX1949 7/8/2014 5:02PM

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1CRAZYDOG 7/8/2014 3:25PM

    emoticon

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HEALTHYNEWPAIGE 7/8/2014 2:05PM

    emoticon I do have a love/hate relationship with my wonderful/frustrating computer. Thanks for sharing and making me laugh emoticon Have a great day!!!

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NAYPOOIE 7/8/2014 12:23PM

    That's great! emoticon

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LIZSPRINGSTEEN 7/8/2014 12:11PM

    LOL

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LITTLEWIND53 7/8/2014 12:04PM

    Boy, can I EVER relate ! ! !

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NEW-CAZ 7/8/2014 11:34AM

    emoticon loved it!

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JANIEWWJD 7/8/2014 10:00AM

    OMG, I loved this blog!!! Isn't that amazing!

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FLYER99 7/8/2014 9:58AM

    That's funny, but true! Thanks. Have a great day!

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Angels explained by children!!!!

Sunday, July 06, 2014




Thought these would be appropriate for a Sunday!








I only know the names of two angels, Hark and Harold.
Gregory, age 5


Everybody's got it all wrong. Angels don't wear halos anymore. I forget why, but scientists are working on it.
-Olive, age 9


It's not easy to become an angel! First, you die.
Then you go to Heaven, and then there's still the flight training to go through. And then you got to agree to wear those angel clothes.
-Matthew, age 9


Angels work for God and watch over kids when God
has to go do something else.
-Mitchell, age 7


My guardian angel helps me with math, but he's not much good for science.
-Henry, age 8


Angels don't eat, but they do drink milk from Holy
Cows
-Jack, age 6


Angels talk all the way while they're flying you up
to heaven. The main subject is where you went wrong before you got dead.
Daniel, age 9


When an angel gets mad, he takes a deep breath and counts to ten. And when he lets out his breath again, somewhere there's a tornado.
-Reagan, age 10



Angels have a lot to do and they keep very busy.
If you lose a tooth, an angel comes in through your window and leaves money under your pillow. Then when it gets cold, angels go south for the winter.


Angels live in cloud houses made by God and his
son, who's a very good carpenter.
-Jared, age 8


All angels are girls because they gotta wear
dresses and boys didn't go for it.
-Antonio, age 9


My angel is my grandma who died last year. She got
a big head start on helping me while she was still down here on earth.
-Ashley ~ age 9


Some of the angels are in charge of helping heal
sick animals and pets. And if
they don't make the animals get better, they help the child get over it.
-Vicki, age 8


What I don't get about angels is why, when someone
is in love, they shoot arrows at them.
-Sarah, age 7










Just love to look through the eyes of a child!!!! Happy Sunday!


emoticon Mary Anne





  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

OPALMOON 7/9/2014 12:44AM

    Just gorgeous!

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REMEMBER2BME 7/8/2014 7:13AM

    Precious!

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LITTLEWIND53 7/8/2014 1:36AM

    So that's how Tornadoes happen!

So great. Thanks for sharing....

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HEALTHYNEWPAIGE 7/7/2014 6:30PM

    They are too cute!! Love them!!! emoticon emoticon

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ARTJAC 7/7/2014 2:11AM

    emoticon

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JANIEWWJD 7/7/2014 12:15AM

    PRECIOUS!!!! emoticon

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LIVINGFREE19 7/6/2014 11:51PM

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MOMMA_BEAR_69 7/6/2014 10:50PM

    emoticon emoticon
These are appropriate for a Sunday and every day of the week!!! Thank you so very much for sharing. It is always a learning experience when you listen to what our children have to say.
Continued blessings and hugs,
Helen

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MOMMA_BEAR_69 7/6/2014 10:50PM

    emoticon emoticon
These are appropriate for a Sunday and every day of the week!!! Thank you so very much for sharing. It is always a learning experience when you listen to what our children have to say.
Continued blessings and hugs,
Helen

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KAYDE53 7/6/2014 9:41PM

    emoticon emoticon

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LIZSPRINGSTEEN 7/6/2014 9:06PM

    awwww

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EABL81 7/6/2014 8:13PM

    These are precious!

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MARIWELL 7/6/2014 7:03PM

    Loved these!
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OVERACTIVEELBOW 7/6/2014 3:32PM

    Thank you for sharing ,,, kids and angels... is that not one of God's perfect combinations?

I know I should say more... but all of a sudden I cannot keep my eyes open... I think I better find a soft comfy place and take a nap!!
Hope your weather is as grand as mine.
Hugs, Audra

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CHACHAOREO 7/6/2014 2:49PM

    emoticon

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1CRAZYDOG 7/6/2014 12:59PM

    Awww, cute. Kids have explanations for everything, don't they!

HUGS

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BUTEAFULL 7/6/2014 12:07PM

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LILYDOG11 7/6/2014 12:06PM

    Cute !!

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Julie Andrews Turning 79

Saturday, July 05, 2014




To commemorate her birthday , actress/vocalist, Julie Andrews made a special appearance at Manhattan's Radio City Music Hall for the benefit of the AARP. One of the musical numbers she performed was 'My Favorite Things' from the legendary movie 'Sound Of Music'. Here are the lyrics she used:

FYI: If you sing it, it's especially hysterical!!!

Botox and nose drops and needles for knitting,
Walkers and handrails and new dental fittings,
Bundles of magazines tied up in string,
These are a few of my favorite things.

Cadillacs and cataracts, hearing aids and glasses,
Polident and Fixodent and false teeth in glasses,
Pacemakers, golf carts and porches with swings,
These are a few of my favorite things.

When the pipes leak, When the bones creak,
When the knees go bad,
I simply remember my favorite things,
And then I don't feel so bad.

Hot tea and crumpets and corn pads for bunions,
No spicy hot food or food cooked with onions,
Bathrobes and heating pads and hot meals they bring,
These are a few of my favorite things.

Back pain, confused brains and no need for sinnin',
Thin bones and fractures and hair that is thinnin',
And we won't mention our short shrunken frames,
When we remember our favorite things.

When the joints ache, When the hips break,
When the eyes grow dim,
Then I remember the great life I've had,
And then I don't feel so bad.



>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

(Ms. Andrews received a standing ovation from the crowd that lasted over four minutes and repeated encores.)



Loved her sense of humor!!!!



emoticon Mary Anne

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

NASFKAB 7/7/2014 5:24AM

  thanks for posting its so true loved it made me happy emoticon emoticon emoticon

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THROOPER62 7/6/2014 6:18AM

    emoticon

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HEALTHYNEWPAIGE 7/6/2014 1:22AM

    She is brilliant!!

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JANIEWWJD 7/6/2014 12:53AM

    OMG, I really liked her new version!!! I actually sang the song!!! LOL!!!!
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EABL81 7/5/2014 10:33PM

    That was great!!

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BUTEAFULL 7/5/2014 8:06PM

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OVERACTIVEELBOW 7/5/2014 7:33PM

    Thanks for the chuckle..

good girl, working on yard work...
You can get quite exhausted but it sure makes you feel good when you look over the work that you have accomplished.
Just hope you didn't over do a good thing.
emoticon Audra

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ARTJAC 7/5/2014 7:32PM

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1CRAZYDOG 7/5/2014 5:58PM

    Isn't that a hoot! Such a beautiful lady inside and out!

Thanks for sharing this.

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KAYDE53 7/5/2014 3:38PM

    emoticon emoticon

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LITTLEWIND53 7/5/2014 1:59PM

    So cute.....

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LAC936 7/5/2014 11:21AM

    I resemble that remark! emoticon

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PHEBESS 7/5/2014 11:16AM

    Love it!

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NEW-CAZ 7/5/2014 10:10AM

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SLIMMERJESSE 7/5/2014 9:34AM

    Cute!

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Happy Story for the Day!

Friday, July 04, 2014






Look carefully at each picture for the cat as it makes its way down from the roof to the dog.
Then, check the explanation at the end.









The story behind this picture is this:
Every day - at the same time - she waits for him.
Sometimes she barks to call him.
He comes; they rub and greet each other
And they go for a walk.
They have done this for 5 years
And no, they don't belong to the same owners.
The owners didn't know until neighbors, seeing them together so frequently,
Commented to the cat's owner, who then followed the dog home
And discovered it was a distance away, not in a house close by or next door.
How it started no one knows.
Wouldn't it be great to have friends like this
Always there, no words needed, they just intuitively recognize
The value of each other in their lives and act accordingly.

Life is not the way it's supposed to be. It's the way it is.
The way we cope with it is what makes the difference.
A wise person once said ...There comes a time in life, when you
Walk away from all the drama and people who create it.
You surround yourself with people who make you laugh, forget
The bad, and focus on the good.
So love the people who treat you right, pray for the ones who don't.
Life is too short to be anything but happy.
Falling down is a part of life, getting back up is living.



Just had to share this touching story! What great friends.

Happy Friday and for those in the US, Happy 4th!!!


emoticon Mary Anne


PS If the picture is too small, move your cursor on it, hold ctrl and press the + key until it's large enough. Just remember to do the reverse and hit the - key to return to normal size!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

OPALMOON 7/9/2014 12:38AM

    I've seen this one before - it's just beautiful.

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HEALTHYNEWPAIGE 7/6/2014 1:19AM

    Love this story!!! Thanks for sharing!

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CHACHAOREO 7/5/2014 10:14PM

    emoticon

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NORASPAT 7/5/2014 7:58PM

    Beautiful pictures and story. Too bad these animals are acting better than many humans.
Friends are for keepers. (((HUGS)))) Pat in Maine.
I am so happy you are back with us. Take care and do not overdo.

Love You Pat in Maine. emoticon emoticon emoticon

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ARTJAC 7/5/2014 7:32PM

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JANIEWWJD 7/5/2014 12:34AM

    OMG, I loved this story!!! It truly made my day!!!!
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LIVINGFREE19 7/4/2014 11:11PM

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LITTLEWIND53 7/4/2014 10:35PM

    What a wonderful story.

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KAYDE53 7/4/2014 10:20PM

    What a heart-warming story!! emoticon emoticon emoticon

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MOMMA_BEAR_69 7/4/2014 10:03PM

    emoticon emoticon What a great story!!!
Enjoy a spectacular Fourth of July. Be happy and stay safe as you celebrate our Independence Day.
Prayers, blessings and hugs,
Helen

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EABL81 7/4/2014 9:49PM

    This is a wonderful story! I had a cat, Bo, some 30+ years ago, who made friends with a dog down the street. I'd never met those neighbors, until one day I went walking down the road calling for him. A woman stopped me and asked me if I was looking for a gray and white cat. When I said yes, she said, "he's back here." She told me that he frequently came down the street to their next-door neighbor's yard and visited their dog through the fence. She said he would never come in their yard, but would sniff noses with the dog and sit beside him next to the fence. I was really surprised because Bo had no experience with dogs that I knew about, and her dog was really big. Then she told me that they had lost their cat months before and the dog really missed it. Somehow, Bo must have sensed the dog's need for a friend and responded to it. It really warmed my heart to learn of it. He sure was a great cat!

Thank you for reminding me about it!

emoticon

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PHEBESS 7/4/2014 9:20PM

    I love cross-species friendships - we need them ourselves!!!!!!

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1CRAZYDOG 7/4/2014 8:47PM

    emoticon

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LIVE_AMAZINGLY 7/4/2014 5:41PM

    Love! Doesn't need words.
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NITTINNANA 7/4/2014 3:42PM

    Too cute!

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NEW-CAZ 7/4/2014 3:39PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon

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NEW-CAZ 7/4/2014 3:39PM

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HOLLYM48 7/4/2014 1:48PM

    What a beautiful story! I think animals are much smarter than we give them credit for and certainly smarter and kinder than some people. Thanks for the smiles!

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WORKOUTWITHPAM 7/4/2014 1:39PM

    emoticon Beautiful story!

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LAC936 7/4/2014 1:38PM

    I've seen this before, but what a wonderful and heart-warming "tail" (tale). Thanks for letting me see it again.
Hugs
Laura emoticon emoticon emoticon

PS Thanks for the tip on enlarging the screen. Loved learning a new trick.

Comment edited on: 7/4/2014 1:40:21 PM

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The Front Porch!!!

Thursday, July 03, 2014






On the first day, God created the dog and said, "Sit all day by the door of your house and bark at anyone who comes in or walks past. For this, I will give you a life span of twenty years."

The dog said, "That's a long time to be barking. How about only ten years and I'll give you back the other ten?"

And God saw it was good.

On the second day, God created the monkey and said, "Entertain people, do tricks, and make them laugh. For this, I'll give you a twenty-year life span."


The monkey said, "Monkey tricks for twenty years? That's a pretty long time to perform. How about I give you back ten like the dog did?"

And God, again saw it was good.

On the third day, God created the cow and said, "You must go into the field with the farmer all day long and suffer under the sun, have calves and give milk to support the farmer's family. For this, I will give you a life span of sixty years."

The cow said, "That's kind of a tough life you want me to live for sixty years. How about twenty and I'll give back the other forty?"

And God agreed it was good.

On the fourth day, God created humans and said, "Eat, sleep, play, marry and enjoy your life. For this, I'll give you twenty years."

But the human said, "Only twenty years? Could you possibly give me my twenty, the forty the cow gave back, the ten the monkey gave back, and the ten the dog gave back; that makes eighty, okay?"

"Okay," said God, "You asked for it."

So that is why for our first twenty years, we eat, sleep, play and enjoy ourselves. For the next forty years, we slave in the sun to support our family. For the next ten years, we do monkey tricks to entertain the grandchildren. And for the last ten years, we sit on the front porch and bark at everyone.

Life has now been explained to you.

There is no need to thank me for this valuable information. I'm doing it as a public service. If you are looking for me I will be on the front porch.

emoticon emoticon



emoticon Mary Anne

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

HEALTHYNEWPAIGE 7/6/2014 1:15AM

    LOL!!! I'm still toiling under the hot sun, but heading for the monkey tricks phase!

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IMEMINE1 7/4/2014 10:12AM

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ARTJAC 7/4/2014 1:43AM

    emoticon emoticon

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PHEBESS 7/4/2014 12:29AM

    Well that makes perfect sense, LOL!

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LIVINGFREE19 7/3/2014 11:31PM

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CHACHAOREO 7/3/2014 10:18PM

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KAYDE53 7/3/2014 9:47PM

    Very clever!! emoticon

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EABL81 7/3/2014 9:36PM

    Well that certainly explains a few things! I'm kinda looking forward to those last 10.

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WORKOUTWITHPAM 7/3/2014 9:24PM

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1CRAZYDOG 7/3/2014 9:03PM

    emoticon

I have never read a better explanation!

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HOLLYM48 7/3/2014 8:20PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon

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TWEETYKC00 7/3/2014 5:39PM

    lol

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EMSSBEARS 7/3/2014 4:56PM

    So that explains a lot -lol




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LIZSPRINGSTEEN 7/3/2014 4:36PM

    LOVE IT!

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LITTLEWIND53 7/3/2014 2:54PM

    I didn't get this memo and don't have any kids, so no grandkids. I guess I will be sitting on the porch for 20 years, lol

Arf, GGGGRRRRROOOOWWWWLLLL, Arf.....

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MARIWELL 7/3/2014 2:27PM

    emoticon emoticon
Good one!
Good thing I sit on the back porch. Less people to bark at out there!

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OVERACTIVEELBOW 7/3/2014 1:41PM

    So, do you have a rocking chair on your front porch to share? I do love to "Rock" !!
Thanks for the smile, okay, thanks for the chuckle.
Hugs, Audra

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LAC936 7/3/2014 1:35PM

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