Thursday, May 02, 2013
Wendy, I am sorry, we are breaking up. You know the story, It is not you, it's me. Well, in this case, it really is you.
I was really hungry last night, so much so that I stopped for fast food, which long ago would have been a regular occurrence, but in the dawn of pink slime, not so much. So last night I stopped. I told myself I would only eat the "meat" and skip the buns. Nope, I inhaled everything, and I also did it while driving, so it was like I ate but have no recollection of it.
And then I felt sick.Blech. Bloated. Disgusting, headachy, and woke up at 3 this morning with a wicked leg/shin cramp. What the heck was that. I have not had severe muscle cramps in a while. Throw ina little msg, mix in some dehydration and who knows what pretending to be a food source and the next thing you know, it's I am not eating that again. So, Wendy it's over. It's not me. It's you. It's all you.
Wednesday, May 01, 2013
Just find something small to change and THEN DO IT.
Here is my spark. I stopped eating scones. Every morning, I would get a cup of tea or coffee with a baked good, most often a scone or a crumb cake. Do I still want them? Sometimes yes, but what I am finding is exerting that little bit of willpower is leading down a path of acceptance, that I can make adjustments, and in doing so, I am PHYSICALLY feeling better. Oddly, I am emotionally feeling better too.
I am starting to become more mindful of what I am doing it when I am doing it. I am reading a book about Every Day Zen and it is about participating in the moment you are in. I am a frequent spinner - no, not the kind on the bike, the kind whose mind is going in 40,000 different directions at once. The result of taking time while I am performing a task is that I am getting more done because I am focusing.
I am not eating in the car mindlessly, because I am driving. That mind time is reserved for driving not eating. I am making little bits of progress with little pockets of success. I am cutting back on wheat (notice cutting back, not cutting out) and it is helping me. I am eating higher quality products. I am peeling more of my food, instead of shaking it out of a box.
Higher quality choices is leading to a higher quality life. Little choices over time are adding up. Beneath all of the processed foods and mindless eating, I am finding something I really like: ME!
What will you find when you start peeling the layers away?
Wednesday, April 24, 2013
I was dying to get that promotion, I deserved it. I did. And I got it.
But now with it, comes a whole host of things I didn't really want: MORE work, and some underlings who are awesome, and some who suck. Mostly suck. It is my job to turn them around. Hard to do with folks who have no incentive to do that.
They think they are working just fine.
So I am chipping away at the things I can control, and I am handling those well. I will spread my wings when I am ready. I took stairs today. Slowly, and one step at a time. So what. I did them anyway. I need to start moving around more. Maybe I can come into work early (or leave a bit later) or just do it at lunch - but I can exercise in my office (chairs) or strength train (yes, Jo, I just said that!) behind my closed door.
Hubby is on a big organic kick, so we are shopping for higher quality food at places like Whole Food and Trader Joes. This is good! Turkey from the deli is REAL turkey. I was shocked the first time out.
So all in all, I am not doing badly, just at a standstill because I hurt when I walk much and that much seems so much less these days. I have a gym membership I am not using, but if I could get in there 1 day a week that would be a good start.
Maybe buying some gym clothes will help. ;)
Hope everyone is doing well. Let's spring forward and get a little momentum going! I'll go first!
Wednesday, March 06, 2013
Take that, powderpuff!
Yeah, I am talking to you! I am sick of being sidelined with weakness, sickness, or just plain ol' laziness. There, I said, laziness! Not when it comes to work. Not when it comes to figuring out the oh so serious issue my client is facing that only I can figure out. Not a smidge of laziness. No siree Bob. But ask myself to do one push-up, one crunch, one stinkin' walk around the block, and I am just too tuckered to do it.
What is that about?
Since when did I give up on myself and throw myself to the wolves. I know exactly what to do, AND I know what it takes to get it done.
Belief in oneself
and sometimes, it takes a village - but that is what Sparkpeople is --- a village of we get it, we got it, and by golly you can have it too, just freaking do it already.
Whew, it is exhausting waking up, isn't it? : )
Saturday, February 23, 2013
I sat down on a two-seater on a train and there was room to spare between me and the gent next to me. Noticeable room. No longer the squish yourself in, try not to get noticed, please don't sigh and be obvious to show that I am probably crushing you and you want to move your seat, or you get up and do.
No, there was room, and I could feel it and not just experience if with a look. It was a feeling. Air space. And then a surprise happened. I woke up. It was a dream, but it was one of those it felt so vivid and real to me that I was not quite tethered to earth. It felt like I was sitting there, and I had room to spare.
So what that it was a dream. Well, maybe not so much of a dream, but a premonition. It is a sign of things to come. It is an indelible memory etched in my brain. Now that I believe it, I am going to make it happen.
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