Wednesday, April 24, 2013
I was dying to get that promotion, I deserved it. I did. And I got it.
But now with it, comes a whole host of things I didn't really want: MORE work, and some underlings who are awesome, and some who suck. Mostly suck. It is my job to turn them around. Hard to do with folks who have no incentive to do that.
They think they are working just fine.
So I am chipping away at the things I can control, and I am handling those well. I will spread my wings when I am ready. I took stairs today. Slowly, and one step at a time. So what. I did them anyway. I need to start moving around more. Maybe I can come into work early (or leave a bit later) or just do it at lunch - but I can exercise in my office (chairs) or strength train (yes, Jo, I just said that!) behind my closed door.
Hubby is on a big organic kick, so we are shopping for higher quality food at places like Whole Food and Trader Joes. This is good! Turkey from the deli is REAL turkey. I was shocked the first time out.
So all in all, I am not doing badly, just at a standstill because I hurt when I walk much and that much seems so much less these days. I have a gym membership I am not using, but if I could get in there 1 day a week that would be a good start.
Maybe buying some gym clothes will help. ;)
Hope everyone is doing well. Let's spring forward and get a little momentum going! I'll go first!
Wednesday, March 06, 2013
Take that, powderpuff!
Yeah, I am talking to you! I am sick of being sidelined with weakness, sickness, or just plain ol' laziness. There, I said, laziness! Not when it comes to work. Not when it comes to figuring out the oh so serious issue my client is facing that only I can figure out. Not a smidge of laziness. No siree Bob. But ask myself to do one push-up, one crunch, one stinkin' walk around the block, and I am just too tuckered to do it.
What is that about?
Since when did I give up on myself and throw myself to the wolves. I know exactly what to do, AND I know what it takes to get it done.
Belief in oneself
and sometimes, it takes a village - but that is what Sparkpeople is --- a village of we get it, we got it, and by golly you can have it too, just freaking do it already.
Whew, it is exhausting waking up, isn't it? : )
Saturday, February 23, 2013
I sat down on a two-seater on a train and there was room to spare between me and the gent next to me. Noticeable room. No longer the squish yourself in, try not to get noticed, please don't sigh and be obvious to show that I am probably crushing you and you want to move your seat, or you get up and do.
No, there was room, and I could feel it and not just experience if with a look. It was a feeling. Air space. And then a surprise happened. I woke up. It was a dream, but it was one of those it felt so vivid and real to me that I was not quite tethered to earth. It felt like I was sitting there, and I had room to spare.
So what that it was a dream. Well, maybe not so much of a dream, but a premonition. It is a sign of things to come. It is an indelible memory etched in my brain. Now that I believe it, I am going to make it happen.
Friday, February 22, 2013
There is only one way to describe my morning: exhilarating, especially this one tiny little piece.
If you have read my last blog, you know I sprained my knee and I have been struggling a bit while walking around. In the short term, I have a cane which is helping, along with some meds, and a knee brace (which will be part of tomorrow's experiment and no doubt, the subject of another blog.)
YESTERDAY, I didn't think I was going to have enough time during the allotted traffic signal when it was my legal time to walk. I felt like I was pushing it to make it across the street in the time before the "walk" went to "don't walk" and even then it was a barely-made-it moment. whew.
TODAY, I still felt the need to push but when I crossed to the other side, I had a full 5 seconds to spare on the clock. Happy dance! Those 5 seconds felt like an eternity, no flashing signal, admonishing me on, just 5 free seconds. It was a moment of glory.
The remainder of the day has not being without its pain and strain on the leg, and the realization that I am not ready for strenuous walking just yet, but it does give me a fair amount of hope that it will be coming, and I will be ready. After all, I had 5 seconds to spare!
Wednesday, February 20, 2013
I've never been speedy gonzalez, but I feel like it this morning. A few days ago, I sprained my knee and my activity plummeted. When I had to go to work, my walking was either excruciatingly slow or an over pronounced limp. Not pretty at best, but frustrating, woeful and hard not to feel depressed about it. What I kept thinking about though, was one of my friends who broke his leg a couple of YEARS ago and is still going through surgeries and rehab stints. I thought about soldiers who lost their legs and would give one minute to be where I am. In the house, it was not much better, and even yesterday I thought about folks who get trapped in their house because of fear. I was afraid to walk down the steps to leave my house, but I braced myself against the door and the siding on the house and managed to get out. (and miraculously in!)
This morning when I left the house, I stood on the front steps until the neighbors drove away. I did my best to look like I was waiting for someone. ha! When I got enough courage to go, (and it was freezing cold!), I did it with the help of a cane and holding onto the bush and it was so much better than yesterday.
That is how progress feels! It takes over you and when you realize it is so much better than the last time you did it, it is like a tail waggin' (if I had a tail), whoop whoop hollerin' feeling that takes a hold inside of you and you want to SHOUT YESSSSSSSS!!! I DID IT!!!!!!!
It is humbling to take a few baby steps, quite literally, and then feel free enough to walk a few steps. It reminded me to not lean on my power, but to share it with my higher power and continue to believe and improve. This was one of those life changing moments I had this morning on my steps! Yes, you can improve. Yes, you can make progress, and pardon the pun, but I am doing it one little baby step at a time!!!!!!
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