MICKEYMAX   39,511
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MICKEYMAX's Recent Blog Entries

X Marks the Spot

Tuesday, March 20, 2012

Here it is. My re-entry into success. Right here. Today. Now. I just did it.

My last BIG success came when I committed to walking just 20 minutes a day. That was it. That was all it took to put my rear in gear, challenge myself TO DO SOMETHING, anything other than giving up, which I have done thousands of times before.

All my success is bred in my head, and if my head can believe it, than my heart can believe it. If my heart can believe it, than I start to trust myself. If I start to trust myself, I can do little things that keep me on the path to success. When I do the little things that keep me on the path to success, I build momentum. When I build momentum, I am unstoppable.

So here I am again on my starting point. Well no, not quite my starting point, my leaping off point. I have done the 20 minutes I needed to do. That's it - that is at the heart of it - just go. And then keep going.

Have a happy day, sparkies!



  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MUGGLE_MOM 3/21/2012 3:23PM

    You Go Girl!!!!!!

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DIFROMWYOMING 3/20/2012 11:08PM

    Good going Mar. Just go. And keep going! :)

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_KATHY 3/20/2012 8:25PM

    Always good to read your blogs. Your thoughts are often my thoughts.

emoticon

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LITTLEFARMMOMMA 3/20/2012 4:32PM

    Absolutely! Baby steps are the steps that WORK! emoticon emoticon emoticon

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TERRIJ_1 3/20/2012 4:08PM

    emoticon

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SARAWALKS 3/20/2012 3:12PM

    YES, emoticon emoticon

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MAVERICK59 3/20/2012 2:30PM

    You got it! It all starts in the mind.
Hugs.

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KKINNEA 3/20/2012 12:49PM

    Exactly - you've got this!

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MAMADWARF 3/20/2012 12:29PM

    Good for you! I'm proud of you for jumping!

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DOODIE59 3/20/2012 12:27PM

    Just ... keep .... trying:)

I love your wallpaper, too.
Deirdre

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TAMPATINK67 3/20/2012 12:25PM

    Great start!

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TREASURINGLIFE 3/20/2012 12:19PM

    Your blog made me smile. :)

Have a GREAT day!!!!

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PEARL-LADY 3/20/2012 12:19PM

    That is so well put! and well done, just keep doing what you are doing......all adds up and makes us feel good x

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NOTABOUTHEFACE 3/20/2012 12:02PM

    They say being defeated is often a temporary condition. Giving up is what makes it permanent. So glad to know you haven't given up and are reclaiming your success!

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REBECCA180 3/20/2012 12:02PM

    I love it. I think I may memorize that. It's exactly how I started! and it's so true!

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Even When You See it Coming

Wednesday, February 15, 2012

You can be prepared for it, see it coming from a distance, and still be bowled over by it. It's not just the death; it's the wave of emotion that comes with it, There's no point in trying to stop that part of it. It's coming, whether you are ready or not.

One of the things that has surprised me, is not that I saw it coming, but I saw it coming first. When those all around me were saying how good he looked or the things that he was doing, I was in amazement, because I did not see any of those things. I saw a cold, blank stare that showed no signs of recognition, and little else, to the point of I thought it was "me" who just did not see the signs that he was coming back, albeit slowly.

I am pretty convinced now that those signs weren't there, and they were just manufactured make you feel better signs. I was ready for a little realism, no matter how harsh. I've seen as much as I care to - it's no picnic watching someone slip away from life.

I said my peace, long and true, and another time in part, in front of my husband and mother, as I decided while it was kind of private, if not now, when....When would I be able to speak my truest words of thanks, than to a man on his deathbed. So I did.

My Dad was a good man, who worked hard, and helped others.

I blogged about him in June in case you want to read it:

http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public
_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=3352051

Rest well, pappa.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

DOODIE59 3/20/2012 12:24PM

    I am so sorry to hear your father passed on. It sounds like he was a lovely soul. You will meet again:)
Hugs
Deirdre

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SARAWALKS 3/18/2012 7:27AM

    Hi Mickey, I missed a big event here in your life. I'm sorry for your loss...having lost both my parents, one suddenly, one where I knew it was coming, I hear you about that wave of emotion...
Thanks for stopping by my page! I'm still enjoying your earrings and think of you when I wear them. Gotta get my blog subs in order one of these days... emoticon

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PEARL-LADY 3/14/2012 7:36AM

    Only just catching up with everyone as I have been away for a while.....so sorry for your loss, it is a hard time. my thoughts and prayers are with you and your family...take care, hope to see you back here soon.

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CAROLFAITHWALKR 2/23/2012 6:37PM

    Condolences on your loss. I lost my dad too, a few years ago. And it was a year on Dec 2 for my sister, who was only 51. You're right. It doesn't matter if you see it coming, it's still the same devastation.
emoticon emoticon emoticon

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BESTCK 2/20/2012 12:58PM

    emoticon emoticon

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JGMK55 2/17/2012 4:55PM

    emoticon

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TERRIJ_1 2/17/2012 11:00AM

    emoticon emoticon

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CIVIAV 2/16/2012 7:22PM

    Here's to that good man who worked hard and helped others. He made a difference!

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TEDDYBEARGIRL 2/16/2012 4:49PM

    So sorry for your loss!

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LITTLEFARMMOMMA 2/16/2012 9:50AM

    Mickey, I am so sorry for the loss of your dear Dad! I may not "see it coming" as in, he's got something wrong with him and his days are numbered, but I do see the inevitable that my dear, sweet Dad is indeed nearing the end of his life. I hope you are surrounded by love and affection during this time. I'm so sorry for your loss and pray you are ready to see your Dad again in Heaven! emoticon

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BJWESTON70 2/15/2012 2:01PM

    My deepest sympathies to you and your family. May God Bless you and keep you at this difficult time.

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Billie

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TREASURINGLIFE 2/15/2012 12:09PM

    I am so very sorry for your loss! (((((HUGS))))) You and your family will be in my thoughts and prayers...

- Michelle

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KKINNEA 2/15/2012 11:10AM

    My condolences, he sounded like a great man and father.

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LISA0517 2/15/2012 11:06AM

    emoticon I'm so sorry for your loss. I'm keeping you in my thoughts and prayers.

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_KATHY 2/15/2012 10:51AM

    emoticon

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DIFROMWYOMING 2/15/2012 9:36AM

    Oh Mar I am sorry for your loss and pain. I do agree with you, it does not matter how well prepared you think you are, or that you see it coming. It is never enough when the loss comes. Sending hugs and I know you are going to be okay, I am so glad you made sure everything you needed to say was said-you will find that a great comfort in the years to come. emoticon

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SHAWFAN 2/15/2012 8:02AM

    emoticonYou and your family are in my prayers.

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TAMPATINK67 2/15/2012 5:01AM

    emoticon Thoughts and prayers for you and your family.

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MAVERICK59 2/15/2012 1:17AM

    Mary,
I feel your pain and I feel your peace.
We can never be prepared for how very final death is,
even when we see it coming.
You are in my prayers.
I know the Angels were there to escort your father to his final home.

May God hold you and your family as you move through this difficult time in your lives.
Hugs,
Belinda

I read your blog about your father. I think I would have really enjoyed knowing him, because it is obvious the apple did not fall far from the tree.
I would say to him-Job well done.

From my heart,
Belinda

Comment edited on: 2/15/2012 1:22:02 AM

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Guaranteed Success

Thursday, February 09, 2012

There are a few things which I am not doing that will bring me instant success if I can push my butt in gear.

1) Interval training (cardio)

2) Strength training

3) Making myself numero uno on the priority list

4) Meal planning...SIMPLY

5) Executing # 4 in advance and stop leaving meals to chance

6) track, track, track, track

and the big enchilada - believe in myself beyond a shadow of a doubt

I am working towards all of these things. From past experience, I know these things are key for me.

Let's roll!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

DIFROMWYOMING 2/11/2012 10:30PM

    We can both do better at this Mar. Let's do that, shall we?
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MAVERICK59 2/10/2012 3:10PM

    With are all here with you Mary!!!
Let's do this together as friends and team mates.

Hugs,
Belinda

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_KATHY 2/10/2012 2:13PM

    Yep on all accounts.... I believe in you !

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CIVIAV 2/10/2012 12:40PM

    You know we all know these things and yet sometimes it is a surprise what kicks me into action. I've been talking about strength trg for a few months. Last week I signed up for a class. I LOVE IT! Hard to believe. Woulda said for sure I hate strength trg. Working out in a community is such a boon.

Good Luck with making your list happen. They are the key to rolling movement!



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LITTLEFARMMOMMA 2/10/2012 11:48AM

    emoticonI hope your weekend is great! You can do these things, too! I know you can! emoticon

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BESTCK 2/10/2012 9:17AM

    I love this post. It's so true. We know what needs to be done, we just need to do it. You're awesome.

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MUGGLE_MOM 2/10/2012 6:44AM

    All of this is so true!!!
You Can Do It!!!!
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DIFROMWYOMING 2/9/2012 11:55PM

    G0!G0!G0!
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DOODIE59 2/9/2012 10:53PM

    You can do this, Mickey:)
Deirdre

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THE-MORE-GIRL 2/9/2012 10:41PM

    And all really doable! emoticon

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TAMPATINK67 2/9/2012 10:18PM

    emoticon

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The Reality Is

Wednesday, February 08, 2012

I had a great old high school journalism teacher who would grab a shock of his own hair, and say, "The reality is...." and that thought has been running through my head overnight.

In a sad, but not unexpected, turn of events last night, my father has been moved into the comfort care stage. This is not exactly hospice care, where death may be more imminent, but the expectation is now dawning on everyone that the man is extremely unlikely to get better.

In some ways, I am relieved. When I would see my Dad, it seemed like he had already left us. Everyone around me though, (perhaps in denial) would act as this were a temporary phase and in no time, he would be walking and talking again. I just wasn't seeing it, and I was starting to wonder if it was just me. I guess not. Maybe it took time for others to accept it. Maybe it took the doctor saying that he is not improving. It's sad. it's very, very sad.

I am emotionally exhausted.

But, I am plugging along. I am in yet another busy period at work which includes interviewing folks, training newbies, and dealing with high maintenance clients. While difficult, these things are welcomed as it lets me focus on the mundane and keeps my mind occupied. I have not been sparking much the last couple of days, but I am still here. Just sending a little love to my sparkies. I'm detaching for a couple of days or so, but I'll be back.

The directive I am giving myself is just keep going. Wishing the same for you.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MAVERICK59 2/8/2012 6:52PM

    This is the part of the life cycle that is so hard to deal with. Please know you and your family are in my heart and prayers.

Belinda

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TEDDYBEARGIRL 2/8/2012 1:50PM

    Praying for you during this stressful time.

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TERRIJ_1 2/8/2012 12:16PM

    I'm so sorry, My thoughts are with you. Stay strong and know you have a lot of support right here.

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DOODIE59 2/8/2012 10:37AM

    I'm so sorry to hear this. You are right to be grateful for busy times at work, but do be sure to take time for yourself. Big hugs coming your way:)
Deirdre

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BESTCK 2/8/2012 10:21AM

    Oh, Mickey! I am so sorry. That is such a hard thing. I'm glad your work helps you keep your mind off of it and doesn't make the situation worse by stressing you out.

I'll keep you in my thoughts.

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LITTLEFARMMOMMA 2/8/2012 9:39AM

    Oh, my dear, dear friend, I am so sorry. My folks were at our house for Christmas, and although they are well at this time, the reality of their age is very evident by the way they are slowing down, sleeping a lot more, etc., especially my dear step-dad. That man came into my life when I was 9 years old, and he has been there for me every step of my journey! How I am going to grieve the loss of him when he passes on! Ah, now I begin to get the tears, so I'll quit... Just know that you are loved and prayed for, my friend! emoticon

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THE-MORE-GIRL 2/8/2012 9:36AM

    Love right back at you. Yep, just gotta keep going, because the only way out is through. I'm glad your dad has such a loving family around him.

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_KATHY 2/8/2012 9:30AM

    Having recently gone through this with my Father, I totally understand. You are doing the right things. It's difficult to think of your own needs at times when dealing with such strong emotions but I know you are a strong woman. You will be OK
Hugs
Kathy

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CIVIAV 2/8/2012 9:14AM

    As rough as it is, reality tends to bring the relief you speak of. I have heard it said I can deal with almost anything as long as I acknowledge it as real.
Hang in honey!

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NOTABOUTHEFACE 2/8/2012 8:26AM

    I'm so sorry to hear this. Spend as much time with him as you can and know that we are here for you.

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DIFROMWYOMING 2/8/2012 8:10AM

    So sad to hear this, Mar, this is always so hard to walk through as an adult. I admire your approach, letting yourself step back and feel your emotions while still caring for yourself is a healthy response. We love you, take care. Di

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JGMK55 2/8/2012 7:23AM

    emoticon This is NEVER an easy stage of life to travel through. You are in my thoughts and prayers - please take care of yourself while you care for your father and family. Come when you can; stay as long as you are able, but know that you are thought of constantly. emoticon

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CABBAGEROSES 2/8/2012 6:25AM

    MickeyMax, so sorry you're at such a sad point. Praying for you and your family as you adjust to this. And a huge "way to go" for still plugging away with everything else going on.

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MYTHBUSTER

Tuesday, January 31, 2012

I'm always going to be fat.

Truth: Maybe, but I can make changes to make me more fit and more healthy.


I'm never going to be as thin as "her."

Truth: Maybe not, but I can make big strides in my health and in my appearance. Stop try to look like and act like someone else, just be your best self.


I don't have the willpower.

Truth: I don't need willpower. I need to take baby steps on my own behalf, and little by little, I will create a wave of momentum that will make a difference.


I'm not good enough.

Truth: Liar, liar, pants on fire. You are absolutely good enough. You most certainly have the power, the skill, the ability and the belief to do this.


It's going to take so long.

Truth: Yeah, so? Your point is? It's going to take longer if you keep denying that you don't have it in you to get started.


I can't.
Truth: You can. Now stop whining and get to it.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MUSICLVR98 2/17/2012 10:06AM

    Love this!! Thanks for busting MY excuses, too!
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PEPPYPATTI 2/1/2012 8:57PM

    You are so right! emoticon

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MELLOWPETE 2/1/2012 8:48PM

  You can do it! One step at a time!

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LITTLEFARMMOMMA 2/1/2012 3:17PM

    YOU, my friend, are AMAZING! NEVER give up your DREAMS! Baby steps WILL get you there! emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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CIVIAV 2/1/2012 1:37PM

    Oh how right you are!

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FLPALM 2/1/2012 12:37PM

    Love this!!!! Great Way of Pointing it out!

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AUBERRY2 2/1/2012 9:52AM

    Great post emoticon

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VIBRANTVAL 2/1/2012 8:33AM

    emoticon Love it! Thanks!

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AKCHELLE 2/1/2012 7:54AM

    Keep the momentum going in the right direction!

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MUGGLE_MOM 2/1/2012 7:19AM

    You always have the most thought provoking outstanding blogs. I love getting the notifications that there is a new one up. Its like a birthday present when it isn't even my birthday.

I was just having some of these very conversations with myself yesterday. My answers weren't nearly as positive as you. Awesome blog! You are such a ROCK STAR!!!!
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BESTCK 2/1/2012 7:05AM

    YOU are so AWESOME! Thanks for the pep talk.

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CAROL- 2/1/2012 6:00AM

    Couldn't have said it better myself and wondering what your doing in my mind emoticon.

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SUE_2U 2/1/2012 3:43AM

    What DEEGIRL said! Truth and thank you! emoticon

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DEEGIRL50 2/1/2012 2:46AM

    Your blog talks right to the voices in my head.
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Believe it ~ Live it! emoticon

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TEDDYBEARGIRL 2/1/2012 1:20AM

    emoticon

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MAVERICK59 2/1/2012 12:00AM

    This was a great and very much needed read for me today. My 'truths' have gotten a bit mixed up. I need to start with the baby steps again. Thanks for an insightful post.

Belinda

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JOANOFSPARK 1/31/2012 11:45PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

loved your blog....yeah, we know all those myths we keep feeding ourselves....but we also know that the truths are more important especially since they are truths and the other are lies and misconceptions and just plain not true.....especially the one about not being good enough.....you are good enough and we are all good enough and we deserve the very best!! yes, we dooo!!

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THE-MORE-GIRL 1/31/2012 11:42PM

    Love love love this!

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_KATHY 1/31/2012 11:19PM

    emoticonyep

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TIME4CARRI 1/31/2012 10:39PM

    Wonderful!!!

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CANNIE50 1/31/2012 10:36PM

    Well, I certainly can't argue with any of your truths. You have remarkable traits and I am glad you don't let the difficulty and discouragement obscure this truth. Life is tough, losing weight is tough, you are tougher.

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DOODIE59 1/31/2012 10:12PM

    I was feeling pretty discouraged today, and your words remind me that I just have to keep going, keep my eye on the prize, work toward my own best self, etc, etc. Just don't quit.

You will get to your better self ... it doesn't matter when; just that you get there:)
Deirdre

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TAMPATINK67 1/31/2012 9:53PM

    Quite those Demons!

emoticon

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DIFROMWYOMING 1/31/2012 9:34PM

    Honestly, Mar, have you been in my head?
Sounds just like me, without the truth part.
Keep going.... emoticon

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