Wednesday, March 21, 2012
For me, once I get that kickstart, I am just rolling. Once I can muster something good into place, it is easier to meet the next challenge, and the next, until the tide is turned, and I get some really good momentum going.
I have been counting down the blood pressure pills I have left. It is not something you are supposed to stop abruptly. I knew I had to make a doc's appt to get evaluated (and/or get more pills.) I started playing the "how many days do I have left?" game a while ago. That was probably about 3 weeks ago. Now I have just enough pills in the jar to count them when they rattle. ... and I finally set an appt for the docs.
It took that one act of doing yesterday to get moving and since then, I have been doing fine. Not perfect, no, but this is not about perfection. For me, the difference between success and failure is my attitude. One good action begets another.
I called the pharmacy to find out why my prescription didn't come. CHECK.
I called the doc's office to ask why the pharmacy said the doc's cancelled it. CHECK.
I made an appt to see the doc. CHECK.
I blogged. CHECK.
I ate fruit. CHECK.
Like little dominos all in a row. One good action begets another until this thing of good health and wellness is rolling on its own again. That's just how I roll.
Have a happy day, sparkies. It's good to have the site back!
Tuesday, March 20, 2012
Here it is. My re-entry into success. Right here. Today. Now. I just did it.
My last BIG success came when I committed to walking just 20 minutes a day. That was it. That was all it took to put my rear in gear, challenge myself TO DO SOMETHING, anything other than giving up, which I have done thousands of times before.
All my success is bred in my head, and if my head can believe it, than my heart can believe it. If my heart can believe it, than I start to trust myself. If I start to trust myself, I can do little things that keep me on the path to success. When I do the little things that keep me on the path to success, I build momentum. When I build momentum, I am unstoppable.
So here I am again on my starting point. Well no, not quite my starting point, my leaping off point. I have done the 20 minutes I needed to do. That's it - that is at the heart of it - just go. And then keep going.
Have a happy day, sparkies!
Wednesday, February 15, 2012
You can be prepared for it, see it coming from a distance, and still be bowled over by it. It's not just the death; it's the wave of emotion that comes with it, There's no point in trying to stop that part of it. It's coming, whether you are ready or not.
One of the things that has surprised me, is not that I saw it coming, but I saw it coming first. When those all around me were saying how good he looked or the things that he was doing, I was in amazement, because I did not see any of those things. I saw a cold, blank stare that showed no signs of recognition, and little else, to the point of I thought it was "me" who just did not see the signs that he was coming back, albeit slowly.
I am pretty convinced now that those signs weren't there, and they were just manufactured make you feel better signs. I was ready for a little realism, no matter how harsh. I've seen as much as I care to - it's no picnic watching someone slip away from life.
I said my peace, long and true, and another time in part, in front of my husband and mother, as I decided while it was kind of private, if not now, when....When would I be able to speak my truest words of thanks, than to a man on his deathbed. So I did.
My Dad was a good man, who worked hard, and helped others.
I blogged about him in June in case you want to read it:
Rest well, pappa.
Thursday, February 09, 2012
There are a few things which I am not doing that will bring me instant success if I can push my butt in gear.
1) Interval training (cardio)
2) Strength training
3) Making myself numero uno on the priority list
4) Meal planning...SIMPLY
5) Executing # 4 in advance and stop leaving meals to chance
6) track, track, track, track
and the big enchilada - believe in myself beyond a shadow of a doubt
I am working towards all of these things. From past experience, I know these things are key for me.
Wednesday, February 08, 2012
I had a great old high school journalism teacher who would grab a shock of his own hair, and say, "The reality is...." and that thought has been running through my head overnight.
In a sad, but not unexpected, turn of events last night, my father has been moved into the comfort care stage. This is not exactly hospice care, where death may be more imminent, but the expectation is now dawning on everyone that the man is extremely unlikely to get better.
In some ways, I am relieved. When I would see my Dad, it seemed like he had already left us. Everyone around me though, (perhaps in denial) would act as this were a temporary phase and in no time, he would be walking and talking again. I just wasn't seeing it, and I was starting to wonder if it was just me. I guess not. Maybe it took time for others to accept it. Maybe it took the doctor saying that he is not improving. It's sad. it's very, very sad.
I am emotionally exhausted.
But, I am plugging along. I am in yet another busy period at work which includes interviewing folks, training newbies, and dealing with high maintenance clients. While difficult, these things are welcomed as it lets me focus on the mundane and keeps my mind occupied. I have not been sparking much the last couple of days, but I am still here. Just sending a little love to my sparkies. I'm detaching for a couple of days or so, but I'll be back.
The directive I am giving myself is just keep going. Wishing the same for you.
Get An Email Alert Each Time MICKEYMAX Posts