Wednesday, January 11, 2012
I did something today totally out of character.
In front of humans.
Seriously I did.
Pretty remarkable for a closet eater.
I had some guys in my office working on my computer. They interrupted my mid morning snack time. So I did something I have never done before. I ate in public. Truth be told, it was weird. TO ME. No one else noticed. My 2 little clementines went unnoticed. I did not see that coming. I really thought all eyes would me on me. Nope, not even close. Huh?
My DH laughs at me. I won't eat out and then bring food home to my parents. Not even coffee.
All of it was called into question. If you do not have enough for everyone, you shouldn't be having it. Thus began my lifetime of closet eating. Until today. I ate clementines.
Yes, I am making this an uber big deal. It just wasn't done.
But I did it. Can I tell you how freaking free I felt today?
It was outstanding!
What have you done to break free of your long-standing beliefs, sparkies?
Friday, January 06, 2012
I got on the elevator this morning with a guy that I've seen in passing. He is usually not Mr. Chatty, but he was friendly this morning. He got off the floor before me, and I noticed when he got off, he sort of bolted down the hallway.
My first thought was, "he's a hard worker."
Where did that come from? I don't even know what he really does, and just that burst of movement of activity put that thought in my head.
In my normal way, I started thinking about what kind of impression am I leaving?
Don't I kind of just shuffle around these hallways?
For those that work with me, and know me, they also know I have an extremely strong work ethic, and can probably rattle off a dozen good qualities (my sense of humor, ability to laugh easily, encouraging of others, quick thinker, calm under pressure, friendly, smart, sociable).
However, for those that don't know me, what am I really saying about myself?
Hmmm. This is something to think about.
I am making good progress on the self care line-up. (Thank God I got my hair done!) I dress professionally, speak well, but I could be doing a lot more to make my outside match my inner self.
I have reminded myself that all things work for the greater good. The efforts I make on my own behalf to look beautiful, and to fuel my body nutritiously will pay off in dividends when I leave that good impression that I am seeking.
I am absolutely convinced that changes in my lifestyle will bring about a happier me because I will be proud of the choices I am making. I am not going to pretend that being thin fixes anything, but aiming for wellness and health will bring positive changes to my life: longevity and feeling good while I am here. I am not just trying to improve the duration of my life, but also the quality.
Impressions aside, -- my life is what I make it.
What are you saying about yourselves, sparkies?
Wednesday, January 04, 2012
I've been having an up and down week. Got a case of the sickies just as it was time to step into up into high gear with my BLC challenge, and also got back to work after a 2 week hiatus. Wasn't that inconvenient? Follow up my coughing spells with being overtired, an inability to hold my pee if I go into a super hack, and I am pretty much moved into crankytown.
Residents of crankytown are frequently prone to ignore their basic needs. Instead of planning for meals, they eat the first thing they see even if it is wholly unsatisfying and contains a lot of artificial -ites and -oses. Residents of crankytown forget their well laid plans. Additionally, these same residents have a tendency to go on attack, especially at themselves.
Not today, buckaroo. I have stopped the infighting and have retreated to the grocery store after work. Not that it did not feel bitter cold, getting out of the toasty car, but it was worth the trip. I scored a rotisserie turkey breast, two heads of fresh broccoli and fresh cauliflower, strawberries (buy1 get 1 free) and a couple of non threatening things for DH. (Can you say happy camper? I thought you could).
Way to go for me! I had some of the fresh turkey and spinach tonight for dinner. I packed up the remaining turkey to take for lunch (and still have some left over.) I washed and prepped some red grapes to take for a snack. Strawberries will go for a swim in my morning oatmeal which I skipped this morning. That started the spiral off in a bad way. Now I am prepped in a good way. My bags are packed and I am on the next flight out of crankytown.
See you at baggage check!
Saturday, December 31, 2011
Sometimes we sit with what's comfortable, just because it is familiar, even if it has outlasted its purpose and no longer fits our needs. At times, I've been guilty of this with relationships, jobs, and habits.
I am working on embracing challenges, and embracing changes. I wanted a visual reminder of being capable of doing something different, so I went to a hair salon and had my hair colored, and highlighted. While I have not done it in a while at all, it was a bigger change this time around, because I went to a d-a-r-k-e-r shade. My hair is not jet black or anything, just a couple of shades into brown when it had been dirty blond for all of my life.
It's a visual cue that I am absolutely capable of making about faces and handling changes even though it might not be the most comfortable course of action.
Whatever little change you can make on your own behalf, I encourage you to do it. Now we have an easy time of turning the calendar over and beginning anew. Use this time as a fresh do-over, and make a change for yourself that puts you in the right direction.
Let's all embrace a little change and do something different.
Happy New Year, sparkies, Wishing us all of year of good health, happiness, laughter, fitness, love, peace and prosperity!
Thursday, December 29, 2011
I've been setting new year's resolutions and goals ever since I can remember. There is one this year, though, that rises above the rest, and it is what I am committed to achieving.
Just be me. and proudly be me. So much of what I have accepted in the past has been over a resignation of this is just the way things are. That is so not true. It is a cop-out to think that things are as is, and nothing can be done to change them.
I've made some progress in the last few days of recognizing that I have to be the driving force in my own life. I have stopped sitting around and waiting for things to happen. I can't always drive my destiny but I sure as heck can drive my reaction to it and be responsible for how things unfold.
To do this, I have to value myself enough to realize (and BELIEVE) that my choices are valid, and I am worth standing up for. It occurred to me that some of the people I cherish most are people who have "stood up for me" and while that is a good thing, I have to take that same tack myself. I have to stand up for me and be accountable for myself and to myself. I am building an authentic life, and it starts with the utter confidence and faith that I have it in me.
What tone are you setting for yourself?
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