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MICKEYMAX's Recent Blog Entries

This is when the going gets tough

Monday, September 13, 2010

The kids are back. School is back in session. I'm an administrator of sorts at a university. I work with kids. They are among the most brilliant and coolest kids I could ask for. Love them,...but they do take a lot of work. Some are geniuses, truly, but also just kids. Funny how those 2 things match up.

I am so busy - I can barely turn around. I need to be an uber planner to make everything work well together. I am having some start-up issues with staying on track. I am so tired, and so bogged down with work, and also training new staff, under deadlines, and trying to keep a smile on my face while I do all of the above.

I am not a mom --- and perhaps if I were, this would all come naturally. It doesn't and I need to work on it. I consider myself blessed to work at such an inspiring place with good benefits, and I do give it my all, and thensome. I need to balance out the home aspect and especially now while I am trying to take care of myself too. Oy!

Need to stay focused and get to bed and get to gym in a.m. --- not only does it help me feel oodles better, it keeps me from wanting to kill one of the kids if they neglect to show up on time, etc. Patience is a virtue, or so they say!

Going to the gym will help keep me sane --- if I can get some sleep. Geez! I am off to bed now --- hoping I can pull this off in the a.m.

Have a happy night, sparkies!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MEOWMAMA3 9/16/2010 9:34PM

    Oh honey, can I relate! Hang in there! BREATHE!!! emoticon

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PROMISE2DESIGN 9/14/2010 12:17PM

    Life is a learning experience! You'll get the hang of it all and you'll do the best you can. I know it. emoticon

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BLUERIDGENATIVE 9/14/2010 11:36AM

    Hang in there! It takes time to find and establish a good routine that works for you. Sometimes, it's best to just focus on & commit to the one thing that you feel will make the biggest difference. When I was feeling overwhelmed in Nursing school, I made sure I packed a healthy lunch every day, no matter what. Just consistently doing that one thing really helped me pull through. We're always here for you, too!
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Hugs,
Jeanna

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TERRIJ_1 9/14/2010 10:57AM

    emoticon emoticon

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DIFROMWYOMING 9/14/2010 9:36AM

    emoticon
Hang in there...

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QUIT_SP 9/14/2010 9:20AM

  Maybe you could save some time and skip the gym, and use the one at the school? Maybe you have co-workers (or even students) that would like some a.m. volleyball or something like that...could be fun...or maybe just you and an i-pod walking the track...?
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MUGGLE_MOM 9/14/2010 7:52AM

    I hope you got your workout in Sweetie. I know the beginning of the school year is tough for you, but you can do it. You are an awesome planner. You got this. I don't know that being a mom makes it any better, dealing with other people's kids is ALWAYS hard. Well, at least I think so. You are doing an amazing job. Keep up the awesome work and don't forget what a wonderful person you are! Keep taking care of you!!!! You deserve it!

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MKT-PLAN 9/14/2010 7:40AM

    I'm sending you good vibes so that you can stay focused and on schedule. You definitely need to take care of yourself first. I got to 316 pounds because I took care of everybody else instead of myself. You can do it!
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DJS-DEBBIE 9/14/2010 6:10AM

    I've been a mom for 27 years and I am having trouble keeping it all going. Between work and school and Spark and fitness and family, I don't know if I am coming or going sometimes!

I got a big calendar and I am going to try to get it all mapped out!

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POOKAQUEEN 9/14/2010 5:19AM

    As a mom, I still stress about too much to do! Nothing will magically make planning easier, but it sounds like you are doing great! I hope you have a great day today!

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JEN_BACK2BASICS 9/13/2010 11:32PM

    You can do it! Knowing how beneficial it is will help. Good luck, and have fun!!

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BRIGHT551 9/13/2010 10:48PM

    You can do it!!! You know what needs to be done, it is just the implementing that is going to take some work. I have faith in you accomplishing this!!!!!!

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TRIP2HAPPINESS 9/13/2010 10:45PM

    emoticon sounds like your right and some planning is needed. Don't worry, you got this! emoticon

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SUSANS111 9/13/2010 10:42PM

    I know how you feel! I was absolutely beat on Friday after only a 3 day week with my second grade class. They are a great bunch this year! But like you say, it takes a lot of energy to get them through all the learning paces each day. Hope you get a good night sleep and have a great workout tomorrow!! I know I feel a ton better today because I left work at a reasonable time and came home for some exercise paddling on the glassy smooth water. We educators have to be vigilant about protecting our workout time!

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Peace

Saturday, September 11, 2010

It took me 9 years to get here. I went on a news blackout today.

A few days ago as the Anniversary of 9-11 was approaching, I realized I didn't have to feel bad about it anymore. Two of my friends (plus thousands of others) died that week when the towers came down. I've felt bad about it for a long time. Of course, I remember the richness they brought into my life. I am just finally ready to let it all go.

I'm no longer stuck in the moment.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MEOWMAMA3 9/16/2010 9:36PM

    Hard. Very hard. My condolences and a big hug to you!

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TERRIJ_1 9/13/2010 11:55AM

    emoticon Healing is a long slow process I am glad to hear you coming to a close.
But never forgotten.

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GROOVYCHICK9 9/12/2010 9:40PM

    I too am ready to let it go. I have taken a news blackout for many years. I couldn't stand all the bad news everyday it was getting me down. I can tell you we all need to remember the good about the people we lost and how they blessed and enriched our lives whether it was on September 11th or another day. I am thinking about you.

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DIFROMWYOMING 9/12/2010 7:35PM

    I heard a woman on t.v. this morning who lost her husband say the same thing, basically. She just said you can't continue to be mad at everyone year after year...I'm glad you feel you can move on and celebrate those lives without remaining in grief. That is a positive step forward! emoticon

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PATRISNA 9/12/2010 2:27PM

    We also had a news black out yesterday. I only felt bad we didn't put our flag out. I did read a few blogs and post. This event changed all our lives forever. I hope we have peace one day.

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MSHOPPER63 9/12/2010 7:55AM

    Mickey sorry for your loss and the loss thousands of other families felt 9 years ago. Remembering your friends for what they brought into your life is a beautiful thing.

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Comment edited on: 9/12/2010 7:56:11 AM

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DJS-DEBBIE 9/12/2010 7:19AM

    I also lost two people I knew and I did a news blackout yesterday too. It really helps.

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GAYLE-G-63 9/12/2010 12:47AM

    That's a true milestone. You can always remember your friends without having to mourn their deaths. You did a good thing today. emoticon

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MAMADWARF 9/11/2010 10:41PM

    wow. that is kind of huge. That was a rough one to let go Im sure... good for you. You can remember without being stuck. (sigh), nice.

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Chipmunk Arms

Friday, September 10, 2010

I lifted yesterday - specifically on machines for chest press, shoulder press, upright row, and thing for your delts. I don't know the name - I think it is something "fly". Ok 15 mins of strength training. It was good. It gave me a happy buzz which I always enjoy.

Today, however, not so much. I do a lot of computer work over the course of the day, I am typing with my arms very close together to avoid the strain. I am definitely feeling the tug on my arms!!! Sure, it's still a happy buzz and burn, and I know it's a good thing --- it's just that I feel like I should be hanging out with Alvin and Theodore today. :)

No gym today. I was wiped out last night. I could have gotten up but it would not have been much of a productive workout. I have really been skimping on the sleep lately. Since I have been very active lately, when I get sleep, I am out cold. That's a bonus!

I did walk for 4o mins today so I am pretty happy with that. If the spirit strikes, I will move more later. :) Have a great weekend, Sparkies!



Happy Friday!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MEOWMAMA3 9/16/2010 9:37PM

    OHHHHHHHH.....took me a few "duh" moments to figure out what chipmunk arms are!!!! lol!!!!!

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QUIT_SP 9/11/2010 9:03PM

  I SO relate. I used to have long graceful limbs and a lovely neck...then once I got fat, I lost my reach, them having to go 'round the bulk of me. My arms kinds shrunk, and now I have the reach of a T-rex!I used to cross my legs with ease, too. And just a few days ago, I realized my fingers look like those short & fat Jimmy Dean sausages.
Oh well, we'll get our rockin' sexy selves back yet!

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AFTERMYKIDS 9/10/2010 1:31PM

    emoticon I love the Chipmunks! If you see them tell them I said Hi! emoticon JK emoticon You are doing GREAT! I did the Lateral Raises with the 3 pound weights the other week and over did it too. emoticonJust do different types of exercise and give those muscles time to recover. emoticon Just think with that kind of pain (HOW GREAT YOUR ARMS ARE GOING TO LOOK!) emoticon
Have a wonderful weekend!
Becky emoticon

Comment edited on: 9/10/2010 1:33:05 PM

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POOKAQUEEN 9/10/2010 12:21PM

    Good job! Enjoy that burn! You've got a great attitude about it as well. You are doing great!

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TERRIJ_1 9/10/2010 12:17PM

    Keep it up !!!!

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PARKERB2 9/10/2010 10:40AM

    Good to see you are staying Active. Keep up the good work and you have a very good weekend. See you Monday. emoticon

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I'm OK, You're OK

Thursday, September 09, 2010

Sure, I read the book. I think it was required reading in Psych 101. Realizations are coming fast and furious lately and I think a good bit of it has to do with me getting active, really active again. I am on a roll and through my activity, I am learning oodles about myself.

For a good deal of my life - I have thought, You're OK and I suck. My Dad would try to infuse me with God doesn't make junk, and he would say I was beautiful, but quite honestly, I did not believe him. I had a very hard time seeing goodness in myself. I did enjoy my writing skills, but if it wasn't for that, I don't know how I would have climbed out of the pain. I took a lot of heat in high school about my size (love to see a show of hands who hasn't) but if I really examine this it was more about me then them. I did not let them see my goodness. I let myself give no concern for my looks or clothes. I believed what they said about me, and I thought I was worthless.

I had some improvement over the years, and one thing I always exceled at was my job. I have worked my buttocks off in the client service field, and managed to get some good gigs including 2 or 3 that I have really loved. Happily, that includes my current spot where I have been for 5 yrs.

A few years ago, I re-discovered my inner goof. I am a prankster at heart and love to clown around. I have a big, kind compassionate heart. I am a very good friend - and have excellent listening and problem solver skills. It took a while for me to able to appreciate myself in this new light. I am actually only a few pounds under my highest weight - even though the scale gods have taken pity on me and have started to head in the downward direction. :)

Now that I am re-creating a life to love, and reflecting those great feelings back on myself, I am also seeing so many good things in myself. Pardon me if I celebrate for a moment. I love that I am embracing fashion. Even Stacy and Clinton believe you can look good at any size. My excitement in this area is only fueling my new passion for looking good. I recently bought a black dress (love oldnavy.com)! and when I showed it to DH, he lit up like an xmas tree. I have been dressless for so long. GO ME!

I've always been able to laugh at myself, and I am still doing that --- it's just that now beyond the laughter there is a love of myself also. I am really enjoying that.

I hope you all can embrace yourself and give yourself a big squeeze. We are all beautiful. Woot! Woot!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MEOWMAMA3 9/16/2010 9:39PM

    What a joyous blog! You go girl!!!!!!!!!!!!!! emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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PATRISNA 9/12/2010 2:23PM

    Wow Mickey,
This brought a smile to my face! I am so happy you are feeling so positive about yourself. Way to Go on buying the new dress!

I finally bought some dresses this spring because I went to a wedding. I waited until I fit into an old dress I hadn't worn in years. It gave me the confidence to go out and try on the two I bought.

Hope you have a great week. I have been catching up on blogs. You are a Shining Sapphire Star!

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PROMISE2DESIGN 9/10/2010 7:03AM

    Go you! WOOT! WOOT! Go MickeyMax, you're a rock star! LOVE LOVE LOVE!!!!!!!!! You are a beautiful person WORTH every second of time to take care of and nurture this wonderful, excited, motivational, inspiration you have become. You go girl :)
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MUGGLE_MOM 9/10/2010 6:45AM

    What a beautiful blog!
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MAMADWARF 9/9/2010 10:27PM

    You sound exactly like someone I would like as a friend. added you! wooohooo!

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BAYBELIEVER 9/9/2010 10:07PM

    A beautiful blog! Yes, we should all love who we are now and then still as we make more and more positive changes, but God didn't make any junk!

(Wish I could remember this all the time...remind me when I need it, please!)

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KIYOSHI04 9/9/2010 10:07PM

    wonderful blog. i am looking forward to getting back to dresses myself. and i am so glad that you are seeing the goodness in yourself.

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BRIGHT551 9/9/2010 9:52PM

    Awesome blog!! We all need to embrace the beautiful, wonderful, amazing person that we are Now!! We don't have to wait until we get to the size or that position or for anything else in life. Love yourself for who you are not who you or anyone else thinks you should be!!! Thanks for reminding me that I don't have to wait but can love me for me NOW!!!!

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ADELCASALE 9/9/2010 9:30PM

    Very poignant....go you! Whenever you need a cheerleader, stop by and I will be just that....a cheerleader reminding you of how wonderful you are!

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Walking Tall

Wednesday, September 08, 2010

As a matter of fact, I am a tall girl - 6 feet. For yrs I called myself 5 eleven and three quarters, because I was embarrassed to be 6ft. I'm over that, and walking taller every day.

I realized this yesterday when I was leaving work. I was walking with my head up. I felt good. I wasn't depressed or overly worried. I knew this would be a busy work week, but it was manageable.

Here's something else I RELUCTANTLY noticed. I feel SOOOO much better when I work out intensely in the a.m. If I go to the gym and give myself a half hour of endorphin spreading love on the bike or the treadmill, then I am practically woozy and giddy with a happy camper attitude through the morning and right on through the rest of the day.

Today was not a morning gym day. Mostly because I had not slept enough and I had leg cramps. I still walked and was happy I did, but it did not give me that freakin' happy feeling that settles in after I've hit the 20 min plus mark at the gym. What? Really? People always say they get addicted to exercise. I DID NOT THINK IT WAS TRUE!!!!

I looked pretty good yesterday at work. Today though, I was rocking a fashionista look including what I affectionately call, "big girl shoes." My inclination would be to live in sneakers if I could, but um, not so appropriate at work. I loved the way I looked today. I think the Mrs. called it "find your pride" --- well I found it and I hit my stride today. I was walking tall.

Next goal besides making a.m.'s at the gym a priority, is to start strength training again. I did zippo the week before last and last week hit 10 mins. It is time to pull this baby in gear. I am ready for more changes and challenges. I am enjoying a lovefest with myself. I realize I have nothing to prove. I've proved it. I am loving myself, and life, and it shows.

Spark on, sparkies!

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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

NOTABOUTHEFACE 9/9/2010 4:35PM

    I LOVE being tall! Revel in that 6' baby. My hats off to ya for working out in the morning. If it gets your day off on the right foot, that's a bonus to the calories burned! So glad to hear you found your pride! There are some days when I'm feeling like I look good and I walk everywhere with "Stayin' Alive" running through my head because who can't hear it without wanting to strut! :) What's your strut song?

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BAYBELIEVER 9/9/2010 4:26PM

    That's so funny! I have always loved being tall. I am 5'11-3/4" and mostly told people I was 6'.

And I know what you mean about walking tall. Even when I am out walking my walks, I have realized how much taller I walk. It's as if someone is pulling a string at the top of my head. Sometimes, I feel lighter than air! Okay. Not really, but I bet you know what I mean!

Great job!

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TERRIJ_1 9/9/2010 1:31PM

    emoticon Keep that felling going !!!! It's sooooo powerful isn't ?


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PROMISE2DESIGN 9/9/2010 10:50AM

    Sweetheart, I know what you are saying about 5' 11" but I actually am 5'11" and I just wanna be 6ft! It has taken a lifetime for me to come to terms with my size, but I have. Tall, sexy, amazon women rock!!!!! I'm proud of you and your progress. You can hear in your blogs how happy your journey is making you. Keep up the good work my friend!!! emoticon

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TRAINER_T 9/9/2010 9:22AM

    Wow good for you for taking it up a notch!
Also I workout in the AM and it makes my day so much more energetic and I feel lively.

Keep it up your on FIRE! emoticon

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RAINYFRIDAY 9/9/2010 9:11AM

    My favorite part of this blog was you saying you loved the way you looked. :) I often find this one of the most difficult things to do, love how I look on any given day, so I love hearing its possible!

Congrats on recognizing how great a good morning workout makes you feel! It's amazing how finding that 30 minutes makes a world of difference for the rest of our days.

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DIFROMWYOMING 9/9/2010 8:04AM

    That is wonderful and I totally agree with you: working out in the morning just sets my day off RIGHT. When I skip it, I notice it all day. I think it's more attitude and empowerment than maybe anything else, but knowing I started off with that one positive is such a boost to the rest of my day.

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BRIGHT551 9/9/2010 8:02AM

    Your blogs are so motivational and full of spirit!! I LOVE IT!!! Keep up the positive attitude and YES, LOVE YOURSELF for what you have accomplished!!!! Way to go!!!!!!!!!!!

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MUGGLE_MOM 9/9/2010 7:25AM

    Wow, you write the most powerful blogs! The excitement and self respect just ooze off the screen. Talk about impressive!

You are doing an amazing job working on the inside and letting it take care of the outside. Keep up the fabulous job! I am so glad to be able to witness this journey. Thanks for taking me along for the ride.

You Go Girl!

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