MICKEYMAX   46,652
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Panic Attack

Saturday, August 07, 2010

We went to Washington Crossing Historic Park today. My husband had been there as a kid, and retained an unpleasant memory as a toddler, when his brother sat him on the top ledge and dangled him off the side (not unlike the Michael Jackson episode.)

The tower has changed somewhat in the last 45 years. There is now an elevator, but it still only brings you part of the way up -- there were still 23 steps to climb to get to the top.

23
narrow
spiral
stone
steps
in
a
very
narrow
passageway

We got in the elevator and then got out of a small floor to go up. I took one look up the staircase and said, "I hate heights. No. I am not going. (we just paid $5 each). No. no.no.

I was going to have to hunch up the stairs sideways on some of it. Really?! It was tiny and tight, even if I wasn't double my "normal" size. Geez. I said ok after hubby said he would block the stairwell to keep any one from coming down. It felt treacherous, but I did it.

Man, I was proud of myself and also so I could be there for hubby while he felt the emotions of dealing with his crappy brothers (RIP) for doing that to him when he was a kid. They are all deceased now (three of them) but this was still hard for my hubby to go up there.

My reward for doing this came later when a biker buddy called him to go riding, and he declined just to hang out with me. :) Loved it.

Here's the stairs: (from top down)




and the view from the top:

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MEOWMAMA3 8/13/2010 6:03PM

    Good for you girl! I had a claustrophobic, twisty stairwell like that in a tiny house in South Philly for 10 years. It had vertical metal bars on the wall for a "banister". We always thought it was like pulling yourself up into the hatch of a ship. My feet went out from under me early on there so I always took them one at a time like a little old later after that. Nowadays I usually only do that if my knee is screaming, but sometimes I do it out of habit. emoticon

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PARKERB2 8/9/2010 2:50PM

    We went on a hike yesterday and saw a fire tower in the mountains. Top of the mountain, literally. The steps on those towers are narrow so that in itself makes for a creppy climb. Good for you for overcoming your fear. emoticon

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SLFRISBEY 8/9/2010 2:28PM

    Nicely done! I know about the narrow winding staircases. When the hubby and I were living in Germany we climbed the Cologne Cathedral's steps and I wasn't convinced I was going to survive!

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1STARVINGARTIST 8/8/2010 8:54PM

    Wow! Great job! Good for you for overcoming your fear. Be proud!
emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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AFTERMYKIDS 8/8/2010 2:42PM

    I know how you feel. I have a panic attack just thinking about heights. I can stand on a chair and about have a heart attack if the kids touch it while my feet are not on the ground. GOOD FOR YOU FOR BEING ABLE TO ENJOY THE MOMENT WITH YOUR HUSBAND. emoticon emoticon
emoticon on being able to take that picture of the steps. emoticonThat looks really freaky from the top.

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RMCNEAL122 8/8/2010 10:36AM

    It is great that you faced your fear. You should be so proud. emoticon

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DATARN 8/8/2010 9:43AM

    That is such a great blog. Thanks for sharing!! You are awesome at being there for your hubby!
emoticon

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BBAHONORS 8/8/2010 8:59AM

    emoticon on facing your fears and reaching the pinnacle (both of you)!

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POOKAQUEEN 8/8/2010 8:22AM

    Wow what a view! I hate stairs like that, gives me chills!
way to go, getting to the top is a mjor accomplishment!

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RAINBOWFALLS 8/8/2010 8:02AM

    Nice view. Great job doing something outside of your comfort zone.

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RIPPEDPAUL1 8/8/2010 7:30AM

    way to overcome adversity!

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BLESSED2BEME 8/7/2010 11:39PM

    Facing fears wehn we can allows for healing in so many ways. Congrats to both you and your DH for what you delt with today.

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MINDYJ1 8/7/2010 11:12PM

    emoticonI would have probably back out of doing it! I don't like enclosed places or heights. That's great that you faced your fear!

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DIFROMWYOMING 8/7/2010 11:10PM

    Wow, what a view! And amazing that you did those stairs! It reminded me of the ones in Blarney Castle in Ireland, and I did not go up there at the time I visited (either time)...I just stood at the bottom and looked up. You did GREAT!
Next time I am faced with stairs like that I hope I can do them.

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MUGGLE_MOM 8/7/2010 10:33PM

    Wow! What an accomplishment! I am so impressed. I don't know that I would have had the guts to go up there in that tiny little stairway. You are climbing so much more than those stairs with every step you take. You go girl! You are totally awesome!!!!

I hope you had fun hanging with hubby tonight!

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GROOVYCHICK9 8/7/2010 10:26PM

    Wow, good for you. I am so proud of you. Bet you feel like a million bucks now that you overcame and kept going. WOOOOHOOOO

emoticon

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GROOVYCHICK9 8/7/2010 10:26PM

    Wow, good for you. I am so proud of you. Bet you feel like a million bucks now that you overcame and kept going. WOOOOHOOOO emoticon

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GROOVYCHICK9 8/7/2010 10:25PM

    Wow, good for you. I am so proud of you. Bet you feel like a million bucks now that you overcame and kept going. WOOOOHOOOO

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GYMMAN59 8/7/2010 10:09PM

    Cogratulations,no easy task,I have found once I made it through that time I am feeling that ever intense impending doom,goes away and is so much easy to do it the next time. emoticon

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LBEEKMA 8/7/2010 10:06PM

    What beautiful views! Good for you for overcoming your fears (and helping your husband too)! emoticon

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BAYBELIEVER 8/7/2010 10:00PM

    So worth the trip! The view is awesome! The accomplishment you feel is priceless! And being there for your husband is a generous gift. Look at where we can go--places we never thought of before--as we are on this journey and lose some of ourselves (physically) while gaining ourselves (mentally).

Congratulations and thanks for sharing the photos!

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Lunch Out

Friday, August 06, 2010

Had lunch with my boss today. This is a former tradition - hanging on out Fridays and laughing it up during lunch.

In the past, I would have had what he was having --- the cheeseburger special, with a foutain drink, fries and chips.

Today, I had a chicken cobb salad. I also reduced the amount of salad dressing I have had in the past from 4 down to 2. I'll wean my way back to 1 eventually. I had skim milk to drink with it. WOOT!

I am stepping up!

Go me!

Spark on!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

BBAHONORS 8/6/2010 10:57PM

    emoticon emoticon

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DIFROMWYOMING 8/6/2010 8:49PM

    Wonderful progress! Good job!

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DJS-DEBBIE 8/6/2010 6:01PM

    You are doing SO great this week!
emoticon emoticon

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TINARENA2 8/6/2010 5:55PM

    You did great and I'll bet it was tasty too!! emoticon emoticon

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BKGOOBERH 8/6/2010 5:36PM

    Good job!!!

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POOKAQUEEN 8/6/2010 5:27PM

    Awesome! A good time and a great choice!

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LOOZINITNOW 8/6/2010 4:13PM

    Go you!!! emoticon

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SLFRISBEY 8/6/2010 2:41PM

    Spark on! Great job at lunch! I went lighter today too, woohoo! :)

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ABC's of mickeymax

Friday, August 06, 2010

It's Friday, my brain is fried, so here is a blog of another sort this morning


A - Age: 46

B - Bed: Sleep number

C - Chore you hate: Dusting

D - Dog's name: (was) Frosty

E - Essential start your day item: Sparkpeople!

F - Favorite color: Green

G - Gold or Silver: Silver

H - Height: Six feet

I - Instruments you play: none personally, always wanted to play the triangle

J - Job: ticket office manager

K - Kid(s): none, but I like 'em :)

L - Living arrangements: me and hubby in our house

M - Mom's name: Mary Ann

N - Nickname(s): mickey, max, kaiser-roll, kaiser soze

O - Overnight hospital stay other than birth: once or twice. Not a fan

P - Pet Peeve: people you can't trust

Q - Quote from a movie: "I have a pool and a pond, and the pond would be good for you." (caddyshack)

R - Right or left handed: Right

S - Siblings: 1 sister, 2 brothers

T - Time you wake up: after 5am, before 6.

U- First word that comes to your mind for "U": undivided

V - Vegetable you dislike: none - brussel sprouts. (ick)

W - Ways you run late: I'm pretty punctual

X - X-rays you've had: who remembers?

Y - Yummy food you make: need to work on this

Z - Zoo favorite: penguins!

Cheers and happy Friday!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

RMCNEAL122 8/8/2010 10:35AM

    emoticon

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POOKAQUEEN 8/6/2010 5:16PM

    I love it! Simple and fun!

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4ME_4LIFE 8/6/2010 11:09AM

    I like green, too!

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DIFROMWYOMING 8/6/2010 9:46AM

    Cute idea! emoticon

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BRIGHT551 8/6/2010 9:33AM

    Thanks for the blog. Now we know a little more about you Spark Friend.........:)

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Unthinking the Thunk

Thursday, August 05, 2010

I left home a little early this morning which makes for a happier commuter. I don't dig getting up, but I do dig the less frantic traffic at the earlier hour. There are fewer cars, and it seems fewer people driving crazy, although that part could really be my imagination at work. Leaving earlier lets me drive at a more leisurely pace, not concerned about how fast everyone else is going and trying to catch up. Frequently I am a passer. This morning I was content to let everyone cruise on by. emoticon

My ability to choose my own road (pardon the pun) is something that is now completely apparent to me. When I was able to bypass the drive through last night (while I was picking up emoticon for my hubby was monumental for me. Logically in the past I could have done the same if I chose to --- but that's just it. I would almost always go along with whatever food choices anyone else would. I rarely consider myself the following sheep, but in this situation I usually stuck to the "whatever you want to do" scene. Leaving there without anything for me was extremely freeing last night. It was a choice. I could have had something....I just did not want it. WOO HOO!




Big u-turn click last night. I am easily and able to modify my situation to fit my life and my needs. This is just the lightbulb that turned on my success before. I was giddy when I realized it. I had a good day. I ate well, walked, prayed and sparked! Who could ask for anything more?

Happy day, sparkies! I'm going out for a quick walk before the humidity takes over the day!
I'm ready to make whatever adjustments I need to in order for things to work best for me!

Wishing you much success today!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

HICALGAL 8/5/2010 11:45PM

    totally digging your blog...food and situations never control us. we always have choices..always. congrats on unthinking the thunk! emoticon emoticon

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BRIGHT551 8/5/2010 10:21AM

    Way to good!!! Small steps in the right directions and making good choices for yourself. Keep it up and keep the feeling of freedom!!!!!!

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BAYBELIEVER 8/5/2010 10:11AM

    What a wonderful choice! It is so awesome that you have gotten to this point. I have a ways to go to get there, but am working on it. Thanks for setting such a shining example!

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PLAYBLUES22 8/5/2010 9:23AM

    WoW!!!!!! Sweetie sounds like you are really happy in the skin your in emoticon

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DIFROMWYOMING 8/5/2010 9:16AM

    There is freedom in choice and every time we make it we free ourselves a little from our shells, too. I almost see it as releasing my body bit by bit. You're doing great...just keep moving!

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4ME_4LIFE 8/5/2010 9:08AM

    Way too go! I know the drive thru has always been a sore spot and issue for me (especially since I used to travel 70% of the year). I had a break through a couple of months ago where I picked up food for my boyfriend but didn't get anything for myself. I'm so proud of you for choosing your own road rather than let someone else choose it for you.

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IMSMILEY88 8/5/2010 9:06AM

    Congrats on your wonderful choice... and on your new way of thinking! I hope you had a wonderful walk. emoticon

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POOKAQUEEN 8/5/2010 9:01AM

    emoticon Good for you! What a great choice last night!
You are making such fabulous strides, you are a wonderful inspiration.


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LOOZINITNOW 8/5/2010 7:56AM

    You are choosing your path and you are choosing well! Great job! emoticon

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PARKERB2 8/5/2010 7:53AM

    MickyMax, thanks for the flowers. They are beautiful. I get out early too and that is intentional so I can avoid the frantic traffic. Get up your good resolve and hang in there. emoticon

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Drive through

Wednesday, August 04, 2010

Hubby could not decide waht he wanted to eat tonight, so I picked his menu choice up for him on the way home from Burger King. What did I get? ,,,

Wait for it....

.....

....

Nothing! I went home and made the broccoli with shredded chicken that I had planned for myself and LOOKED FORWARD to having today. I was alla bout my bad self today --- knowing that I can do this --- and I am doing it --- one step at a time --- but according to my plans....

WOOT!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

DJS-DEBBIE 8/6/2010 6:01PM

    emoticon emoticon

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GROOVYCHICK9 8/6/2010 12:34AM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon

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CHERKYLE 8/5/2010 11:41AM

    Oh how did you do that after smelling it! BK is not my favorite, but those flame broiled things sure do smell good!
emoticon emoticon emoticon

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BLESSED2BEME 8/5/2010 10:11AM

    Good choice!

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PLAYBLUES22 8/5/2010 9:26AM

    That's right Sweetie, throw that chest out

"Ya Bad"

Go Go GO emoticon

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POOKAQUEEN 8/5/2010 9:12AM

    Yay! That's so awesome! Way to stay on plan, good job!

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1STARVINGARTIST 8/5/2010 2:34AM

    Wow! Good for you! emoticon emoticon

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_KATHY 8/4/2010 11:39PM

    Go on with your bad self ! ! WTG !

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TRIGFROST 8/4/2010 11:12PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon

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KMICHA 8/4/2010 10:37PM

    Awesome! Way to go! Steer clear of those drive thrus! emoticon

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AIMEEM77 8/4/2010 10:27PM

    WAY TO GO!!!!!

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BBAHONORS 8/4/2010 10:25PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon

I thought about going through a drive-thru for myself tonight but came home and cooked something quick instead. Doesn't it feel emoticon

Comment edited on: 8/4/2010 10:26:51 PM

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