Friday, July 16, 2010
I'm smiling at myself in the mirror, enjoying the hint of a dimple returning. On Fridays, I like to stop at Panera Bread for a little end of the week chill time. This morning, I stopped but did not have a monstrous breakfast as I have had in the past. I ate a bagel with light cream cheese and coffee. It fits in perfectly well with my plan for the day. After I chowed down during a previous week, I could not believe how many calories I was taking in during that one sitting. I realized I was trying to quell panic and comfort myself. I have started unravelling myself one bite at a time. Asking myself many things? Why am I feeling angst? What could I do to make myself feel better? If I did feel better and have less angst, what would I eat?
Subtle changes are happening in me. I think of things in a positive way, and while I have always been an optimist, I am also using that same measurement stick on myself.
I was remembering the last time I lost a significant amount of weight and where I was in my life. I was very ease with myself then, after having a very honest and cathartic session with a guy who would become my personal trainer for a while. It was a big turning point for myself. I am back in the place of comfort with myself and it has naturally led me to more conscious efforts on behalf of myself. I am parking farther from the door. Those 300 extra steps add up.
My success is all laid out in front of me. I am fully confident of my success especially as I move forward one step at a time.
Wishing you all a very happy Friday!
Spark on, sparkies!!!
Tuesday, July 13, 2010
There! It happened! I did not get up this a.m. --- might be Real Housewives of NJ related where I stayed up past my bedtime. Ridiculous. BUT....I am committed to working out today even though I did not get up this a.m. to go to the gym. I will either do my new bootcamp exercises OR go to the gym tonight. Either way, it is getting done, no ifs, ands, or buts!
I am honoring myself with my commitment to myself. I want to move. I want to breathe and feel good. It is all working together. I feel fantastic!
Have an awesome day, sparkies!! WOO HOO!
Monday, July 12, 2010
Besides sparking, I'm into facebook, and very recently, twitter.
Today I came across a post from Kurt Warner (football player). Here's what he said that spoke to my heart: "I DON'T WANT 2 WORKOUT! Ever been there? Not going to dwell on it, going to get it done & day will b better from there! U do same! later"
I love that here's a professional athlete saying the same thing that so many of us feel from time to time. Truthfully, though, as many times as I have been in THAT state, I did want to work out today. :) and now I have!
It is so great to have that feeling of setting a goal and doing it. I did make a plan to walk today and I was astounded to come back and learn that I was out for 45 mins. So, I got in what I needed and also got a friend's bday pkg dropped off to the post office (so what if her bday was 6/23) - it's still under a month since! I love being able to walk to errands or shops (when I am at work) and kill 2 birds with one stone. It's actually almost time to leave for the day, but I will hang out for a bit.
Tonight, I am looking forward to going to get my hair cut and then hang out to watch Real Housewives of NJ. OH YEAH!!!!
Monday, July 12, 2010
It was hiding for a while. I'm not sure if it was under a rock, or perhaps in one of the cabinets way back under the sink, but it doesn't matter any more. I found it: my passion for life.
I was caught up in one dimensional thinking, letting every last ounce of my spirit focus on losing weight and not getting anywhere. I totally lost track of why I was doing anything, let alone trying to fight a battle of not losing and just repeating the same scenarios that got me off track in the first place.
Giant lightbulb moment this Saturday. I took a good long look at my inner self (although oddly, I was standing in front of a mirror) and realized I had just misplaced my spark, my zest, my passion and that is what i am truly made of. (not just splenda and spice, and everything nice.)
I'm committed. I'm engaged. I'm focused. I am on track. I couldn't believe how quickly it all seemed to turn around. It was like "Ding! I get it now!" I stepped out in faith and left the fear behind.
I went to the gym yesterday in the middle of the day (in shorts.) I have been paranoid about wearing shorts in public for so long. It wasn't the first day I have worn them, but it is getting easier and easier. I have a foot long scar on my lower leg from cellulitis that never went away. It looks gross, and I hate it, but it is also a sign of where I have been and how God pulled me through it, so I don't despise it. It actually improves when I walk more, so that is also incentive when I have my game face on.
Got to the gym and the woman behind the counter commented that I was determined now. Yes, I am! I rode the bike and then on to the treadmill. I have not walked on a treadmill in ages. It was good to be back. :)
Had a great weekend with my hubby. It was good to be off work, and still active. He used his r & r time to take the Harley for a spin, while I went and worked out. It made me think it was a perfect day. :)
I'm going for a walk today (now, in fact), and then off to the gym in the a.m.
Hope you are all have a really great day! Spark on, sparkies!
Thursday, July 08, 2010
Feeling much better now --- but no gym and little movement for me today. I hope to be back to "normal" tomorrow. I was totally punked out this a.m. and even stayed home from work and a meeting. This too shall pass. Hope everyone is staying cool!
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