MIAMI_LILLY   106,569
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MIAMI_LILLY's Recent Blog Entries

Acceptance

Wednesday, November 12, 2014

I have not written a blog in ages...almost 5 months, to be exact. I've sat down in front of my computer so many times, and just couldn't bring myself to write anything. I think there are a few reasons why but the one that sticks out the most is my weight gain.

When you lose a significant amount of weight, it is always done with the intention you'll never go back to your old habits or your old weight. I was so sure of my lifestyle and new habits, I donated all my clothes that were over a size 12. But what do you do when a medical condition is mostly to blame for your weight gain? Does it hurt any less? Are you more forgiving of yourself? Short answer...not always.

My closet is full of jeans I can't breathe in when I put them on. Or ones I can't get on at all. I was left feeling really down. My thyroid got the best of me. My TSH numbers have been all over the place this past year. Here I am, training for my first half marathon, and I couldn't run 2 miles. And I keep thinking, "if I could just lose the 20 pounds I've gained, I could run so much faster". It has taken me months to accept the fact that these pounds, no matter what I do, will not come off. And I cannot run as fast as I used to. I used to run a 10.5 minute mile. That was my peak and I will not see that again any time soon. I am no longer a size 10/12. I am now a 14. That was one of the hardest things I've had to do, was buy bigger jeans. Just as hard was weighing in on Monday and actually updating my ticker. No more lying to myself, and everyone else out there. I am 5 pounds away from leaving Onderland, and I will fight like hell to never return.

What I've learned from accepting the negatives, is that the positives become so much more sweeter. I can't run a mile in 10 1/2minutes. It takes me 12. But every week, I'm running further. So what if I can't finish my first half marathon in 2 hours? I'M GOING TO FINISH A HALF MARATHON, PEOPLE!! That's 13.1 miles! And I could never have imagined that when I was 275 pounds!
My doctor asked me if my pulse was always this slow. My resting heart rate is like, 53 beats per minute! That is amazing. When I was morbidly obese, my resting heart rate was over 90. That's scary.
And I'm not a size 10. But I'm not a size 24 either!

So I'm going to thank God for the body He gave me, and accept the fact it's not perfect on the outside, but it's close to perfect on the inside. And it's allowing me to do things I never thought was possible.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

ARUNNINGKAT 11/13/2014 2:03PM

    I am pretty sure thyroid issues are the worst! Hang in there! Love that you are at a place of doing what you can, but also accepting what you can't change. I read something the other day about how we often fail to see the good in our bodies. We spend our time complaining about our chubby legs and never realize what our life would be like without those chubby legs. I know I am not explaining it very well, but perhaps you get what I am trying to say. Anyway! Love that you are finding the good!

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SEATTLE58 11/12/2014 6:54PM

    It's so good that you wrote this blog even with you feeling bummed out with starting it anyway. I really think you did so good in writing it and by the end of it, you were so upbeat and ready to tackle all that you needed to tackle! emoticon So see, it's best to come out and write something even when we don't feel so uppity about everything! I've written too when I haven't felt the best and I probably should again. The last time I had written a blog, I had gained around 20# with my right bum knee keeping me from exercising like I want to and with having RA to begin with, it's tough to do much anyway! So my weight gain is really from my medical condition too. I am scheduled to have a full knee replacement Dec. 15th and then I hope with P/T etc., and with time, I'll be able to walk like I used to. Oh please!! emoticon I can kind of enter in with you too, with the thyroid issue. I have a hypothyroid and my TSH has increased and then decreased. This last time it had decreased, so less medicine, so that made me feel good. My heart beat has been up in the 90's for some time with being overweight and now lower with losing weight. I love to exercise when I can and that's a change from the 232# me!! With my low thyroid, I always still have to push myself to exercise, but don't we all to a certain point? I got down to a size 14 and am now up to a 16. Ugh! My aim is to get down to a comfortable size 12 here on SP. I will do it one day, I know I will and you will get to where you want to be too! We will do it!! I had gotten so close to my Onderland.....about 7 more #'s and I wouldve been there! We have to really mean it too, don't we?!! Hugs to you, Karen

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TMW54812 11/12/2014 2:30PM

    We all know it's much easier to share when we loosing weight or maintaining goal. Kudos to you for being grateful about your much improved health even if not at goal weight. Living our Spark programs means will be as healthy as we can be ( at this time). You are young, beautiful , and living the healthiest lifestyle possible ...you are doing great!

All the best,
T.

Comment edited on: 11/12/2014 2:31:14 PM

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HDEGMD 11/12/2014 2:01PM

  You will be fine... Keep heading to Spark. and keep the I CAN attitude you have .... . and remember what you have learned. Best wishes and thoughts to you.

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MARGOH12 11/12/2014 1:18PM

    Well done with the positive attitude it is easy to give up when your health is so problematic ( I have a chronic back condition) so I know only too well how awful it can get. You are doing brilliantly emoticon

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Setbacks

Tuesday, June 24, 2014

Don't you hate it when you have the motivation just oozing out of yourself, but keep getting sidetracked by life ciircumstances?

Three weeks ago, I had a somewhat-terrible upper respiratory infection. I say "somewhat terrible" because I've suffered through worse, but nonetheless, it's hard to do cardio, when your head feels like it may implode, and you cough so hard, you may bring up a lung.

As soon as that ended, and I was almost fully recovered, I was hit with a toothache. I chipped a tooth about a half a year ago on an atomic fireball and hasn't bothered me until last week. And if you've ever had a toothache from a top tooth, you may know that it's not just that tooth that aches, but literally, your entire face, and the pain kinda drifts up to the top of your skull. Not nice. Once I recovered from that nightmare I got....
whatever the heck decided to sting me on my ankle. I was getting into my van on Sunday wearing sandals. I felt a bite from a very small black bug (I don't even know what it was but I'm guessing some kind of spider). That night my foot was swollen, but not too bad. In the morning I awoke to a foot doubled in size, hot , and itchy. And the redness...it looked like I was wearing a red sock pulled up a third of the way up my leg. I took a variety of measures, but by the evening it felt like it had its own heartbeat, so I decided to go to urgent care. They gave me a shot of steroids and antibiotics and some benedryl and sent me home with presciptions for more of the same. Oh and direct orders to stay off my feet until it's completely better. Worst news for a runner. I missed crossfit yeasterday and most likely will miss run club tomorrow.

I am trying to decrease my calories a bit seeing I'm not burning any. The sooner this boot heals, the better.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

EVER-HOPEFUL 8/25/2014 5:57AM

    you know what they say.whenever it rain it pours lol.hope it all get sorted out soon. emoticon emoticon

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FINCHFEEDER80 6/26/2014 2:50PM

    get well soon!

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BATCHICK 6/26/2014 10:47AM

    I hope you are all healed up and better soon!

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SEATTLE58 6/24/2014 3:33PM

    Hugs to you and I hope that you'll be on the mend soon! It's so good that you've gotten some good remedy to fix what's ailing and that also, we live in this modern age. There's so many times that I stop and think about how thankful we can be for that. More hugs, Karen

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ARUNNINGKAT 6/24/2014 2:21PM

    Ouch! All of that sounds super painful, especially the foot part. Whatever that little bug was sure did a number on you. As a fellow runner, I hope for a speedy recovery for you!

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NGCHILD 6/24/2014 2:00PM

    Sorry about the setbacks! Take care of yourself and rest. I do hope you feel better soon!

Nic

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SHELLE13 6/24/2014 1:56PM

    Ugh! Glad you're okay though! Bug bites are crazy! I get bit a lot, must have sweet blood, but never had that happen. Spiders can be deadly, glad that you're only missing a few workouts and that you're not in the hospital! Good on your for staying on track!

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GAL7288 6/24/2014 1:46PM

    Oh man, when it rains it pours! Hang in there, sometimes it's just life telling you to take it easy, an who knows you might need the rest. Take advantage of it while you have to and do something else that interest you. Maybe before you didn't have the time or inclination to try something new, but while you recover you can give it a try. I hope you feel better soon, soon enough you will be up and running again!

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Cutest. Puppy Pics. Ever.

Friday, April 04, 2014

I had to post the most recent photos of the new puppy. She has grown leaps and bounds since we got her 3 weeks ago. I think I will post new photos regularly.





  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

GREGGWEISBROD 5/16/2014 10:38AM

    SO SNUGGLY LOOKING!!! :D

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PATRICIA-CR 4/24/2014 9:48AM

    Awww, how lovely! emoticon

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TEALHAWK1 4/24/2014 9:25AM

    Sweet!

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PENOWOK 4/24/2014 6:27AM

    Pretty cute!

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GOGETTERME 4/18/2014 7:13PM

    So cute!

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BATCHICK 4/6/2014 11:13AM

    what a cutie!!

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LIZSPRINGSTEEN 4/5/2014 1:34PM

    SO ADORABLE!!!!

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TRYINGTOLOSE64 4/4/2014 10:14PM

    Wonder how cute she'll be when she starts chewing!! LOL

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SEATTLE58 4/4/2014 9:59PM

    Oh my, such a darling little sweetie pie. I sure would take her in a heartbeat too! You are so blessed and I'm so happy for you! Mutual love indeed!! emoticon

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-WRKNG2ABTTRME- 4/4/2014 9:48PM

    Beautiful...Enjoy!

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MJ7DM33 4/4/2014 9:42PM

  emoticon She is so cute!

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EVER-HOPEFUL 4/4/2014 9:21PM

    sweet emoticon

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ALICIA214 4/4/2014 9:19PM

 


What a sweet little girl...


emoticon

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MTN_KITTEN 4/4/2014 9:19PM

    emoticon

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First Day of April

Tuesday, April 01, 2014

I am setting a goal for myself to lose at least 5 pounds this month. I am still carrying around the 15 pounds I've gained, and I want it gone. My day has been crazy busy. So far today I've:

1. Got my 3 girls off to school
2. Ran 2 miles
3. Showered and went to Petco for puppy food. When we got her 2.5 weeks ago, she weighed 2 lbs., 11 oz. Today she weighs 7. She's eating me out of house and home.
4. Went to the Vitamin Shoppe and over paid for protein bars. But it was kinda worth it because they had awesome flavors I've never seen before.
4. Went to Walmart. Had to get the usual household supplies, and then I went nuts buying my girls Easter candy. May God keep me away from the robin's eggs...please.
5. Went to get an estimate on putting an a/c compressor on my 1996 van. So the mechanic tells me he can put in a rebuilt one, plus a new blower motor for $370. But he can't guarantee it. He said it's like "putting on a new outfit, crapping in it, and then changing your clothes without showering". What does that mean???
6. Then went to Costco, Apparently, the last time I was there, a Costco employee voided my membership card because it's my hubby's card, and he wasn't with me, so I would have to get someone to help me validate my membership the next time I came....which was today.
7. Put away a ton of groceries, and now I have to cook dinner, and help my little one with her homework.

I didn't even get to eat my lunch until 3:30. If I could stay this busy every day, I could easily reach my goal.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

GREGGWEISBROD 5/16/2014 10:40AM

    #5 ... O_o That's about all I can say about that, lol. Where do people come up with things like that?! Has he crapped in a dress before? Or someone he knows has done that? How does someone's brain find that as an analogy? lol! :D

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MTN_KITTEN 4/4/2014 9:56AM

    I'm tired just ready your errands.

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EVER-HOPEFUL 4/3/2014 5:24PM

    wow you have been busy emoticon

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LIZSPRINGSTEEN 4/2/2014 3:47PM

    emoticon

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DEWEESE4 4/2/2014 9:50AM

    Keep up the good work!

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NGCHILD 4/1/2014 9:23PM

    I am exhausted reading your list! !

We can both lose that 5 lbs this month. We are leaving for vacation in a little over a month. Its GOTTA GO!!

emoticon

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SEATTLE58 4/1/2014 6:34PM

    Well Sweets, to tell you the truth, I've put on 12# of my 67# loss and it makes me sick and frustrated, but I won't give up and I know that you won't either! We can do it! I'm going to do the same as you, to work on losing 5# this April. There's nothing like the present! I keep going around the same numbers and this has been since the holiday gain of 2012!!!!! Sick, huh?! I know that the key to all of this is to keep busy. That's exactly what I did with my first 12# gone. Our daughter got married July of 2011 and we were running around and that's a perfect to shed pounds! emoticon

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CHERIJ16 4/1/2014 5:44PM

    You are BUSY! Remember to carve out a little time for yourself! emoticon

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Public Enemy No. 1

Friday, March 28, 2014

I've had tons of reasons for not working out. If I could get paid for creating excuses, I'd be a wealthy woman right now. My motivation has a tendency to come and go, and lately, it has been way gone. But for 2 weeks now I have used this creature as my main excuse:



At 4 weeks old, we took her in, and she became public enemy no.1. Yeah, yeah, she's cute..adorable even, but don't let that fat tummy and yummy face fool you. She is a poop machine. And she could not be left alone. If I caged her to go workout, she would bark, and whine, and wake the others still sleeping. So it makes sense that I would have to skip my exercise sessions to babysit. I mean, what I could I do?
I know. You don't have to tell me how pathetic it is to blame the cutest puppy in the world for not getting my lazy rear end off the couch. She's close to being housebroken, so once she eats and poops, I wll be headed out for a Saturday run, and blame the baby no longer.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MAMAJENC 3/30/2014 7:30PM

    Awe so sweet! Don't be hard on yourself silly! You rock

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NGCHILD 3/29/2014 4:08PM

    So cute! !

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THE_SHAKESHAFT 3/29/2014 9:25AM

    OMG so cute!!

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MNCYCLIST 3/29/2014 8:52AM

    Well, we all have our moments, but hang in there, where there's a will, there's a way!

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ADVENTURESEEKER 3/29/2014 1:17AM

    adorable!

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SEATTLE58 3/28/2014 11:08PM

    Don't be so hard on yourself. You'll make up for the loss once she's housebroken and jogging right beside you and no more babysitting, like you say! Sooo darling! I could take every puppy in the world if we had the room. One darling, precious doggy fits the bill just perfectly for me too. She's laying on the couch beside me, fast asleep and so content! Oh ya, we love them!!

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EVER-HOPEFUL 3/28/2014 10:28PM

    ahh so cute.just think she may be public enermy number one now but just think it wont be long before she is your best excuse to exercise.enjoy your run. emoticon

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