Sunday, August 24, 2014
Yesterday a group of friends and I went kayaking all day. SO much fun; one of my favorite things to do during the summer. It could be a healthy way to sneak in exercise, only, we drink all day long too. I ate a healthy breakfast (a big one too, since I knew I didn't want to eat junk). And, I packed some healthy snacks- some cheese, grapes, and sliced cucumbers. Awesome, right?! Well, it was until we got home and we were all STARVING (which I am pretty sure we weren't, we were just dehydrated). So, my friends ordered pizza and you better believe I had 4 pieces. FOUR.
If that weren't bad enough, I went home a couple hours later and swung by McDonald's and ordered a burger and fries with a pop. Ate all that too!
So, today, I am feeling like BLAH. I do not feel good. I do not feel good about myself. I feel really, really guilty because I have been doing SO great for the past 2 weeks. I will get back on the "wagon" so to speak today. However, I am scared to step on that scale tomorrow. (I've been weighing myself every Monday).
I seem to always do this-sabotage my hard work. Even when I try so hard to prevent it!!
Wednesday, August 13, 2014
I'm getting ready to go to bed. I was perusing the internet and stumbled across this website. I encourage ALL of my fellow Sparkie women to take a look. It's a little graphic (some nudity), however there are so many wonderful pictures....
Take a look and remember, no matter what size you are, let's love ourselves. Let's love eachother.
Have a wonderful night loves!
Tuesday, August 12, 2014
Today was day #2 of Jillian Michael's 30 day shred. Whoo I'm feeling it. I was really tired when I got out of work, but I stuck to my guns and forced myself. I'm hobbling around the kitchen making dinner now.. low carb zuchinni bake. Yummo.
I'm having a glass of wine with dinner. This put me just over my calories today. But, I'm not depriving myself. I will drink it and enjoy it. I'm going to add in an extra cardio day this week to make up for it.
Slow and steady. One day at a time. Just gotta keep telling myself that.
Monday, August 11, 2014
This may be the umpteenth time I've started over. But, this time WILL be the last. I actually took official "before" photos this time. I want to post them, but I'm too chicken at this time. I will, but I'm not ready just yet. They were hard to look at, to say the least. I've created a folder in my email and every week I will post new pics along with my weight. Eventually, I will do this here..when I'm ready.
So, I tracked everything I ate today. I also did the Jillian Michael's 30 day shred. Man alive! I will be sore tomorrow! lol.
A lot of things have changed over the past few months. I left my boyfriend of 6 years. I'm starting over. I have my own place, doing my own thing again. It feel liberating. Now, it's time for this last bit to fall into place. It was hard to leave my ex, but I did it. This proves to me that I can do anything I set my mind to. This includes my weight loss.
I want to stay positive. I want, scratch that, WILL stay accountable. That's all I have now.. me and my amazing and supportive family and friends AND of course, you Sparkies out there. You understand more than anyone how hard this journey is.
My journey is a long one. I have about 80 pounds to lose. But, small goals for now, right? My smaller goal is to be down 35 pounds (starting today) by Christmas. That's roughly 2 pounds a week. I think it's totally attainable and realistic. But, more than pounds, I want to focus on my self-esteem, and inches -how my clothes are fitting. That will keep me going more than that pesky scale!
I feel good. I feel it's right this time. I can do this!
Thursday, January 02, 2014
So, it has been a whole year since I've even blogged. Actually, in all honesty.. since I've really even sparked at all.
I've gained back all the weight I lost with SP, plus an additional 15. I swore I would never be here again. But, here I am. Back to almost 2oo pounds. What the heck happened?
I could dwell on it. OR, I could get off my a*s and do something about it. I will do the latter.
I've been working on my sparkpage on and off today when I get a second. I have made it my resolution to spark more- to set new goals and stop beating myself up for being overweight yet again.
I will stick with it. But I need your support. I feel like I'm lost all over again. And, this sinking feeling isn't going away on its own. I really hope I can do this.
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