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If you have nothing nice to say.........Just a venting rant

Thursday, September 05, 2013

It's been a very hard week emotionally for me. This blog is nothing more than a vent that I desperately need to get off my chest. It has to do with events that have happened outside of this web site, but I have to talk about in order to move on. You don't have to read it, it's more for me than anything.

Tuesday we gave our Buddy up. We didn't sell him, we gave him to a wonderful family. He was my fur baby, the golden fuzz love of my life. So why did we have to give him up? Because my oldest is very allergic to him and the doctor suggested strongly that we do give him up. She was to the point where she couldn't breath at night, even medicated. I feared that she would stop breathing in her sleep.

The decision to give him up was a long thought out decision. We struggled with it, the kids begged, Kendra is racked with guilt over it. However, in the end we had no choice. Buddy had to find a new home where they would be able to give him love the rest of his life.

Before anyone criticizes my family know this, we bent over backward for him when we first got him. We could have easily given him back to the SPCA a year ago when we adopted him. He had major skin issues, we went through all sorts of food choices until we found the raw diet that stopped all his issues. I would be up nights with him because he was throwing up all night when we first got him. We dropped more money than we could afford in the beginning with vet bills because of his health. He was 7, shared my birthday and we fully expected to keep him for the rest of his life. Sadly my daughter's health and well being come before anything else.

It's amazing how criticized we are now that our friends and family know about our decision to adopt Buddy out. He won't end up back in a shelter and he won't be put to sleep, these people don't believe in that. They rescue shelter dogs from being put down. Sadly according to some people we are the devil's spawn and evil humans who treat animals as disposable in their eyes. Buddy wasn't disposed of, he was lovingly given to a home that will love him almost as much as I have in the time we had him.

These people that have thrown their opinions in our face, they have no children, they consider their dogs their children, so they have no idea what it means to walk by your child's room and hear them struggle to breath, wake up so tired that at 8 years old, they can't make it through the day without napping because their nights were spent trying to expel the congestion. They don't know what it's like to explore other options, hoping to keep your fur baby and your child healthy but realizing that keeping her drugged for the rest of the dogs life is not an option, and homeopathic isn't an affordable option. Not when I have to keep both child and dog fed.

You don't agree with my choice as a mother, that's fine. I don't expect the whole world to, but like the old saying goes, if you don't have anything nice to say..............then keep it to yourself. I made a choice for my family's health. I miss my Buddy, the house is so empty without him, he was larger than life and he was my fur baby. I love him so very much.

End of Rant, if you made it this far, you are brave. Thank you

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

STEPMOM_MJ 9/6/2013 12:15AM

    I am so sorry you had to give up your fur baby. I had to do the same thing with my puppy leelu. It broke my heart, but we didn't have the resources to care for her properly and she deserved better. I know it must be very hard for you.

Don't worry what other people think!! They don't know what's in your heart or the truth of the matter. People can be very cruel...don't let them get you down.

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ROSEPETAL80 9/5/2013 7:22PM

    I'm sorry you were criticized about this decision. And I'm glad you were able to find a good home for your dog. It's a tough decision and as you said, you made the right choice by not sending him to a shelter.

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DEJAMQ 9/5/2013 3:00PM

    I know how it is to have to give up your fur baby. Great job for finding him a new home that will love him as you did. It is a tough decision to give up that pet but when it comes to our kids thats what we have to do.

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KELLIEBEAN 9/5/2013 2:37PM

    I had to keep reading.

That anyone would question what you did is reprehensible! Your child couldn't breathe! How could they expect you to do anything differently??!!! Not having children is no excuse for their insensitivity.

I admire you for what you did and I feel for your daughter.

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FANNISHMOM 9/5/2013 12:12PM

    Big hug. That is such a hard decision to have to make. I especially feel for your daughter who must be feeling so bad about this situation. Just keep reminding yourself that you did all you could do and you found him a new loving home. Good luck.

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FINCHFEEDER80 9/5/2013 11:47AM

    I've had to rehome a dog, my beagle back in '05. My mom and I still talk about him. I know how gut-wrenching it is. You have my condolences.

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ABUFFKIN 9/5/2013 11:45AM

    It is obvious to me that you love Buddy, and that you hated to give him up. You did do the best thing both for him and for your family and I am sorry that there is anyone in your life that is criticizing your decision. If people would pay as much attention to their own business as they do to other people's business, the world would be a much better place. emoticon

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CAT-IN-CJ 9/5/2013 11:14AM

    I can so relate. I've had to give up several of my fur-kids along the way. And it tore my heart out each time. I adopted them for life. But sometimes the realities of life circumstances gets in the way.

There are always those who will criticize and judge us for decisions we make. You did the right thing. And you know it.

So, consider the source and FLUSH their crap.

I am sure your heart is still broken because of the decision you were forced to make. (I know mine still breaks when I think about the ones I had to make.)

Focus on the good things in your life . . . . like an 8 year old who can now have a healthier life.

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BIGPAWSUP 9/5/2013 9:08AM

    You had to make a very dificult choice/decision. I, for one, am happy you found him a family instead of making him a rescue's problem. Thank you for doing that.

I hope you daughter gets past the guilt and your family can move forward.

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GLITTERFAIRY77 9/5/2013 8:52AM

  emoticon
I had to give my kitties up last year, because I just couldn't afford them AND the dogs. We had gotten them as kittens. The dogs were saved from "friends" who just did not care for them the way they were supposed to. I was HURRRT that I had to make that choice, and I still think of my Periwinkle and Roxy, but I know they needed someone who could afford to give them the care they deserved.

My mother later got a couple cats from craigslist from a family who dealt with the same things you dealt with Buddy. Perry and Roxy were MY cats and my financial responsibility. When we had a mouse problem after Perry and Roxy moved on, my mother said we needed cats and she'd take on the financial responsibility for vet bills. The lady we got them from was so desperate and hurting so much when she handed them over to us, but what a blessing these new-to-us kitties have been. Buddy is going to be the same for the family you rehomed him to. Give Miss Kendra a huge hug and tell her it is not her fault, and that it is not as if she chose to be allergic. Her life matters. Buddy is in good hands. I wish you all the best.

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KRICKET57 9/5/2013 7:44AM

    I know it was a hard choice to make and I am sure you made the best choice for your family. True friends will understand. You are right with your words "if you have nothing nice to say ... keep it to yourself." I agree completely. They have no idea the pain of having to make the choice and are only adding to it.

While I cannot imagine my life without our puppies, it would be harder to loose one of my children. No one should have to make that choice, however for those who do; you have my admiration.

Thank you for reminding us of how important it is to have all the facts before we make judgement on someone else. No one else can know how you feel and friends should be supporting you, even if they do not agree with the choice you make. They are not you and therefore cannot know the pain of that choice.

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OXIMORON 9/5/2013 7:32AM

    What a hard decision to make. I'm sorry that people choose to impose their opinions on you without understanding what you're going through. You made the choice that was right for you and your family. True friends should support you no matter what.

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ELRIDDICK 9/5/2013 7:09AM

  Thanks for sharing

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My early morning addiction

Thursday, August 29, 2013

Hi! My name is Mel and I'm addicted to the scale. I get on it every morning, waiting with baited breath hoping to see the numbers go down, even it if is in inches. I do a happy dance in my bathroom when I see the numbers go down, I celebrate each ounce lost, even if I would rather pounds. I need to attend scale addicts classes. I need an intervention. I wish I could ignore the pull of the scale, because I'm very much SV driven.

emoticon - The bane of my existence, my early morning habit. I think we need to break up!

So, if I haven't already made it clear, I am in a long term love/hate relationship with my scale and it hasn't been nice to me at all. It gave me a tease last week with a two pound drop. This week it took those two pounds back and laughed at me as I looked down upon it. I have been working my butt off, jumping on my elliptical for 30 minutes, doing wall push ups, kettlebell routines and getting on the floor for modified crunches (praying each time that I can get back up). So I had a talk with my scale this morning, told it (it's pink by the way) to be nice and show me my hard work is paying off, it has until Sunday to change it's attitude.

I have been doing all that I can, I log everything I put in my mouth, I limit my portions, I don't snack at night anymore, drink water like I'm a camel lost in the desert, I am in bed at 9 every night and I'm sweating bullets. So what gives? Why am I not dropping weight like I did the first time I started SP when 40 lbs jumped off me and ran for it's life?

Something has to give here, I'm giving it all I've got and it doesn't seem good enough! So for now I will continue to glare at my scale, watching what I eat, controlling my portions and begging for some results to show somewhere! I don't even have NSV to fall back on to encourage me!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SHARON2014 8/29/2013 5:47PM

    Hi, I'm Lee and I am a scale junkie! I tried to stay off but it calls to me the minute my eyes are open! Maybe if I put it out in the garage...it's not attached so would be a bit of a walk!! emoticon

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DEJAMQ 8/29/2013 3:26PM

    Hi Mel. I'm Deja and I to have this addiction. I know that I should weigh myself every day but I do and I don't have to will power not to step on the scale. I hope you find a way to beat this addiction and if you do please share how you did it.

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KATHIEATKINSON 8/29/2013 1:49PM

    Ugh I am right there too Doll!! I obsess about weighting myself every morning and get is discouraged if the number is not reflecting my hard work. I am trying really hard to not step on it again until Monday weight in's for the challenge....we will see just how much self control I have lol emoticon

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TIGER_LILY_613 8/29/2013 11:57AM

    I used to weigh myself several times a day (which is unrealistic because your weight can fluctuate several pounds in the course of a day), then once a day (until I lost 40lbs too, and hit a plateau - then the scale started driving me crazy), and now I limit it to once a week.

Hitting a plateau is pretty common. It can be caused by a bunch of things : retaining water, hormones, that "time-of-the-month", , not eating enough (surprising, but true!), the body becoming more efficient at doing the same cardio over and over again, building new muscle, and many more reasons. Also remember that as you lose weight, the same workout routine you did before will burn fewer calories !

Spark has some great articles on plateau busters. They may have helpful tips for you.

I know it's rough (I really do !), but try to be patient.... Just keep making good workout and food decisions and the weight will come down again.


Comment edited on: 8/29/2013 11:58:11 AM

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ELECTRICITY3699 8/29/2013 10:38AM

    emoticon

Seems like many of us struggle with that scale. I too weigh in almost daily. I've been working to break the habit but it's a hard one. Good luck and hang in there. You are doing great no matter what that scale says!


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BIGPAWSUP 8/29/2013 10:17AM

    I had to break the daily weigh ins - too much stress. I'm at once a week now. I don't keep the scale in the bathroom and I don't keep the batteries with the scale. Makes weighing-in more of a project. And give me time to think that I don't need to do this every day.

Also, try weekly measurements. I was gaining for a while there (very upsetting on the scale) but I noticed my inches were going down. I'm putting on muscle! Makes a huge difference.

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NHES220 8/29/2013 10:07AM

    I weigh myself everyday too, but mainly to keep myself on track. I also know that other things have an impact on the scale - am I retaining water because of the sodium in my diet. I then look at other things too - how are my clothes fitting? Can I go down a notch on my belt? The scale is not the only measure of success, but it does keep me in check. Good luck!
Noreen
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RUSSELL1960 8/29/2013 9:01AM

    I weigh myself daily as well. I find it to be a helpful tool for learning and a means of accountability. Over time I've learned what to expect in terms of daily fluctuations and I work hard not to let them affect my mood. There may be just a small change needed to gain the breakthrough you want. There is a spark team and spark coach program dedicated to helping people bust through plateaus. You might check it out. Best wishes!

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SANDYCRANE 8/29/2013 8:58AM

    I weigh myself a lot also. I have found that I my scale will differ during the week. In fact this week I have seen a weight of 167.5, 167, 166, 163 and all the way down to 161.5. The lowest one being after riding my bike in extreme humidity for 120 minutes. I also track everything and exercise. As you lose more weight your body becomes more efficient and it is harder to lose the weight. Switch things up little, perhaps do different exercises. Keep up the good work, the weight will come off, just do not give up.

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SWEETSOUNDS11 8/29/2013 8:48AM

    Bodies are funny and weightloss is fickle. If you actually call your behavior an addiction (it doesn't meet the clinical criteria btw) why not look at the 12 steps for some mind-soothing wisdom? By that, I mean there is great comfort and paths to acceptance in recovery literature. You might find a way off the scale and more peace of mind. Good luck with your endeavors. You are a success!

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Exercise Ball at Work

Tuesday, August 27, 2013

So I got it into my head that having a chair simply wasn't enough fun, I thought I would bring my big blue ball with me (encouragement by a lot of Storm team mates didn't hurt either lol)


I'm sitting here on it as I type and wondering if anyone has some simple small workout ideas that won't make me look silly in front of my co-workers? I basically sit on it and squeeze my thighs together and sit up straight and tighten my core throughout the day. The feeling at the end of the day is like me being on my elliptical for an hour. But I want to do more.

Any suggestions would be helpful!!

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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MDKM80 8/27/2013 11:21AM

    Bigpawsup - Thanks for the ideas, I know what my lunch break will be spent doing!

I very much enjoy having the ball, makes me feel like I've gained a lot in my workout routine! Last night I got home from work after sitting on the ball and did 30 minutes on my elliptical, now my hams burn, which is a great feeling knowing that I've worked them out! I highly recommend the ball if you have a desk job!

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FINCHFEEDER80 8/27/2013 10:42AM

    I need to get a ball for my desk at work. I would love that!

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SHARONCAPPS 8/27/2013 9:15AM

  Can't help you but sounds interesting.

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BIGPAWSUP 8/27/2013 8:57AM

    I've been on my ball at work for over a year. Try some leg raises under your desk and maybe sneak in a couple of crunches when bo one is looking!

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What to do when my clothes wont fit?

Sunday, August 18, 2013

Yesterday I had a company bbq to go to. It was my first event that I went to since restarting my journey. Let me tell you I rocked yesterday. Said no to a lot and did awesome portions. However before that I had to go shopping for a wedding outfit. I got a skirt and a strapless shirt. Something I would never have done but look good in. I got to thinking about what Im going to do with my clothes when they dont fit. Sure some of them I will donate, but im trying to think of what to do with a few favorite shirts and my new skirt. Im hoping I can take the skirt in some considering im trying to lose weight but i still want it to fit lol. Most of all ill just be glad to lose the big clothes. Onward to a new me.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

ROSEPETAL80 8/18/2013 5:27PM

    Great job! Congrats!!

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BIGPAWSUP 8/18/2013 12:07PM

    Absolutely awesome!!!

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CHERIJ16 8/18/2013 9:45AM

    Doesn't it feel GOOD? I am down from a size 14 to a size 8 now but I still wear some of my size 12 shorts around the house. I still want to lose 10-15 pounds so I am being careful of what I buy yet but it sure is fun to pick up a top in a medium or small and actually have it fit.
I have tried consignment shops but they don't pay much so I usually give to Good Will.
Good Luck! emoticon

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EMILY0724 8/18/2013 9:31AM

    I know what you mean! I've been holding pants up with a belt (literally--that's the only way I can wear them) I'm sure they look baggy, but it feels so good in many ways! In the past, I line dried everything to prevent shrinkage. Now I machine dry to try to shrink my clothes! I'm going to put off buying new things as long as possible!

You did great at the BBQ! Keep up the good work!

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SKYVALLEYGAL 8/18/2013 9:26AM

    I feel your pain. I am pretty much a clothes horse and have closets full of clothes. Back in the winter I reached the point where I had to have a few pairs of slacks taken up. Now those are too big. I've bought a few pieces to supplement my wardrobe most of them purchased in consignment shops. I did take about a dozen pairs of capris to a consignment shop early this summer. They sold them and I used the credit to buy a couple of skirts and a pair of capris. I feel very limited in what I can find to wear everyday now but am reluctant to let go of too many of the clothes that are too big and reluctant to spend money on new clothes. Am I alone here? I have dropped from a size 12 to an 8 since last October.

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BELINAJ1 8/18/2013 9:23AM

    Great Job. It is a wonderful feeling when you have the option for new clothes and everything looks great on you.

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FINCHFEEDER80 8/18/2013 9:19AM

    I think I'm going to hang on to my favorite jeans, for a "look what I used to wear" kind of thing, but other than that, they're going to be off to the goodwill when they don't fit anymore. With a resounding, "WOOHOO!"

I love that you picked out something that you normally wouldn't, and recognized that you looked good in it. How awesome are you?? Cheers!

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SABLENESS 8/18/2013 9:01AM

    If you're really attached to something and it's worth it to you, you can probably have it altered. You could also try a consignment shop or ebay. And, you may find something you like even better! emoticon

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KESTRYLL 8/18/2013 8:59AM

    Way to go!

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pre workout munchies

Saturday, August 17, 2013

When I get home from work I usually am still in the mood to work out. The only problem is that Im too hungry to want to before dinner and too full after so I havent been working out. I think my best bet is to eat a snack after work and then hit the elliptical. Well at least im using my excercise ball at work instead of a chair. Lol thats a fun experience! !!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

ROSEPETAL80 8/18/2013 5:23AM

    that's a good plan. I end up going to the gym in the evening after my daughter is put to bed, so that's usually at least an hour after supper.

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BIGPAWSUP 8/17/2013 7:49AM

    I sit on a ball at work too. I love it.

Snack and elliptical sounds good.

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