Saturday, July 19, 2008
I was so sure, this morning that I'd shifted at least 1kg, 1/2 even...I'd jumped on the scales yesterday but ignored it because it wasn't my normal weighing time, but today there it was, 2kg HEAVIER. I'm in tears. Ok, I know I'm not tracking my food but eating wise this week wasn't any different from any other - I could at least have stayed the same.
Oh why does my state of well being have to be so completely connected to my WEIGHT? I was really looking forward to today and now I'm a complete MESS. I'm trying not to cry out loud so my dear one is not disturbed and distressed too. 2 kg. Do you know how long it takes me to shift that and yet I put it on in a WEEK.
I went to the gym 4 times this week, I ate my own lunch, I didn't eat after 8.
I know everything's so much worse at the moment just because everything's so much worse - I can't help but immediately connect this back to my pregancies, when I stopped exercising, when my body statrted to change. Such a mountain to climb to get back in shape and not even a baby to show for it.
So, what can I call on from my armoury of 'how to feel better' to get over this?
1. writing this has already helped
2. nice messages from other sparkies (thank you)
3. browse website for inspiration and consolation
4. wear prettiest matching underwear
5. cycle out to see house on market thinking of buying
6. look on the bright side - although the scales are being unhelpful I do actually feel fitter and more toned, maybe it's muscle weight built up to gobble up the fat weight in double quick time.