Wednesday, January 06, 2010
I've been reading The Spark and it has inspired me both at home and at work. I've mostly been concentrating on work. I had been on maternity leave and "lost direction" since I've been back. I've been doing my job (and doing it well), but I've just been going in, doing what's on my plate and going home. Just sort of bobbing in and out. I'm working on developing my long, medium and short term goals for work, but first I did a mission statement. How can I set goals if I don't know what I'm striving to achieve, right?
So, when I sat down to do my "personal goals" I decided that I needed my own mission statement (I think techinically this is a vision statement, but it works for me.)
So, here is my mission:
My mission is to be a good mom, wife, friend and relative; to maintain a tidy and organized home; to have a happy and healthy family; and to be happy with me.
I will add my goals later. Right now, back to work. Lunch time is over.
Thursday, December 17, 2009
It's been a while since I've posted. I fell about a week and a half ago and broke my foot in two places. Hoping to back up and running (well, zumba-ing) in a few weeks. It's very frustrating because it's my right foot, which means no driving. I could possibly do some strength training at the gym if I could get there.
I just printed out the 20 minute resistance band workout and hope to do that 3 times a week. I just need to find my box of bands. Trying to figure out what to do for cardio.
I'm mostly frustrated because I had actually been seeing some progress and had started getting into a routine. It's been a long time since I've been enthusiastic about exercise and to be knocked out of the game... Grr....
So, time to get up and fighting. I can at least watch what I eat, right?
Monday, December 07, 2009
And... I broke my foot... *sigh*
No more Zumba for a while. :(
Saturday, November 28, 2009
OK. We're still in Thanksgiving weekend, but I think I'm far enough into it to be able to look back at the big T-Day and evaluate it.
I'm thankful that my gym was open on Thanksgiving day. :) I was able to get in there at 6 and do both cardio and strength training before coming home and making the green bean casserole that I was taking to the big Family Thanksgiving. (That took much longer than I had anticipated.) I also brought veggies for during the football game (that didn't get there until the second half because the green bean casserole took much longer than I had anticipated), so I was able to munch on healthy stuff before dinner was served. I had also eaten a small breakfast (toast, apple and peanut butter) and a small lunch (McDonald's hamburger) in anticipation of the feast to come.
For supper I took a 3 oz portion of turkey, a healthy portion of green bean casserole and corn and did the "3 bite rule" for everything else. My plate was full of stuff that I liked, but not overloaded and I didn't go back for seconds. For dessert I had a sliver of chocolate pudding pie and pumpkin pie. "Munchie wise" I ate a few olives, pickles and veggies. I also drank water instead of soda or wine. I managed to stay within my calories for the day.
The next day... *sigh* Qdoba after shopping. Need I say more? Then again, on the way home I realized that the gym was open, so I headed there for 45 minutes on the recumbent bike.
This morning, a marathon long Zumba class. One and a half hours. I must say that this one was much more fun than the last. I figured out a couple of things... 1.) Running shoes are a bad idea for Zumba. Your feet stick to the floor. I have new "dance" shoes (Nike Musique) that worked much better. A $45 investment that was well worth it.
2.) Standing directly behind the instructor is a bad idea. As the instructor moves, you can see your reflection. I stood behind and left of the instructor and put a person directly in front of me. I hardly saw myself at all.
3.) I wore my heart rate monitor. This focused me more on my cardiovascular health than my negative energy of not being very good at it. (I got it up to 153 bpm at one point.) Of course, I don't have the manual for it and I forgot how it works, so I accidentally deleted my results before I figured out how many calories I burned... Grr....
4.) Misery loves company. Having a couple of people that I knew (albeit not very well) there made stumbling through a little more fun.
All in all, a good weekend so far. Sunday is my "day off". Although... the Packers don't play, so I may go Zumba again anyway...
Wednesday, November 25, 2009
So far the Holiday Trimmings contest has been keeping me mostly on track. Last weekend, not so much, but I have turned things down, skipped a potluck at work and made some more than half-hearted attempts at exercise.
Last night I tried Zumba. I tried it after work through a work sponsored class a couple of weeks ago and liked it. I tried it last night at the Y. It was fun. It was exciting. I burned a lot of calories and worked up a pretty good sweat. I enjoyed it and will definitely be going back. OK... Let's try this again...
Take two: It was completely demoralizing. It was draining. It was heartbreaking. I couldn't wait to get out of the room so I could go find some place to cry. Why do people think that in order to be able to dance you need to be completely surrounded by mirrors? Really?
It also didn't help that most of the people in the room were young, fit, thin and pretty. I spent almost the whole hour trying to focus on the thin perky ass that was the instructor. Trying to get her moves down. (How do hips move that way?) Trying not to feel so large and unwieldy. I even took off my glasses so I wouldn't have to see the others, or the mirror.
There was one older gentlemen in the class. He looked like he had lost some weight, but still needed to lose more. I looked at him at one point and thought, "If he can do it, so can I." Then I thought, "I wonder if someone is thinking the same thing about me." I looked around and I was one of the heaviest people in the room. I don't remember looking around and thinking that before. I remember the days when I was one of the skinniest people in the room. I was pretty darn close to "Here... have a sandwich" skinny. Again... heartbreaking... demoralizing... I used to be able to dance. I used to be able to move. I wasn't a professional by any stretch of the imagination, but I could at least get my body to respond to what I wanted it to do.
How did I get here? I know what to do. I've read the books. I've watched the videos. I've scoured the internet. I've been on SparkPeople for years. I should be able to do this. I shouldn't have gotten here in the first place. But I did. And I have to own up to it.
I'm fat. There. I said it. I'm fat. I'm the fat woman in the back of the Zumba class a half step behind everyone else. Hoping that nobody sees how uncoordinated she is. Hoping that she won't see herself in the mirror. Hoping that she doesn't start crying in the middle of the workout because she remembers what used to be.
So, am I going back to Zumba? Yes. Will it be easy? No. Will it be demoralizing, draining and heartbreaking? Probably. So, why am I going back? Because I broke a sweat. Because I burned a lot of calories. It was exciting and it was fun. And some day... I'm going to have a skinny ass and be able to get my hips to move that way...
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