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2nd trimester - and Sparking back!

Thursday, March 15, 2012

Eep! So, since my last blog entry we didn't TTA very well.

On December 8th we found out we are expecting and due August 18th! The first trimester was nerve wracking after loosing Lil Bit in September. Not to mention the constant nausea! I got out of the habit of tracking my food because I didn't feel like thinking about food, much less writing down what little I ate.

But - I eventually started feeling better (and more energetic, and more like myself again!) and here I am at 18 weeks! A week from tomorrow we find out if Baby S is a boy or girl!

My weight was staying in the range the Dr gave me pretty well, but this morning it jumped up. Time to track my food again! My goal as an already over-average weight mommy is to only gain about 15 pounds (which would put me at 200.4 from where I was the day I found out). I've never been over 200 pounds, and I'm really hoping I can keep from going over.

But, not to the detriment of our little one. What IS good for our little one is for me to eat healthy foods - and there is nothing like tracking on Spark People to make me want to put healthy things in my mouth even when I'm craving things like jelly beans and root beer. And to get back on the exercise! I've done my prenatal yoga DVD "here and there" but I need to be more purposeful about exercising. My Dr. recommended walking 1 mile a day. I'd like to alternate the walking (maybe more than 1 mile) with the yoga. Now if only my schedule would cooperate!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SNOWANGELDIVA 3/17/2012 4:39AM

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MCJULIEO 3/16/2012 10:37AM

    I really LOVED swimming when I was pregnant, swam a mile three times a week during second child's gestation....

and your fall due date would fit perfectly for that, if you are so inclined...

Walking is good, too, but being pregnant is hot work, and swimming is easy on joints! Highly recommend!

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Monday, November 14, 2011

For those of you not versed in the acronyms of the fertility world ... TTA means "Trying to avoid."

DH surprised me this weekend by saying he'd like to TTA for a while. Long story short, "a while" means we need to pay down at least one of my student loans. Meaning, a year or so.

I'm at a loss. I don't want to work DH to death, don't get me wrong. But I'm 33. And AF is here ... so I'm a little emotional.

I feel the emotional eater in me wanting to come out and eat ... eat what? I don't even have a specific craving. Psh. Lame. Guess I'll munch some celery.

Just had to share. I'm an emotional mess, and I know that in the past that would have greatly affected my calorie range. Like eating a whole bag of M&Ms is going to fix the fact that I want to be a mom so badly. I want a baby, not a food baby!

And I want my husband. I'm just feeling rather blindsided by this news, and it has cause some strife. Nothing we can't get past, but still ... I miss feeling closer to him.

Anybody got any good verses for this one? I'm all ears ... really really REALLY want to let the Holy Spirit in on this one.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MCJULIEO 11/16/2011 6:32PM

    My first thought was from Ecclesiastes, the third chapter-
Ecclesiastes 3
A Time for Everything
1 There is a time for everything,
and a season for every activity under the heavens:

2 a time to be born and a time to die,
a time to plant and a time to uproot,

You want the Lord's timing I know.... and sometimes that means waiting...

Hang in there....

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INKEDPETALS45 11/16/2011 1:55PM

    Like Yoitle above, I'm no Holy Spirit, but I do know that you'll get pregnant when its the right time for your family. Dont rush it or delay it. Just let it happen naturally. In the mean time, my personal opinion is put together a financial plan for a second car & student loan payoff over the next 12 months then relax and let nature take its course. Good luck!

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MANDALOU_S 11/15/2011 12:19PM

    We did have a conversation last night, and the 9 months thing naturally came up - so it is looking like, if we do avoid, it will only be for a few months (at least till we get a second vehicle).

He also had to take a patient to labor & delivery last night, and is having lots of "feelings" just like I do - like "Why exactly are we putting this off?"

We got married in May and were leaving it up to God, and got pregnant the month we least expected it (while on a mission trip in Nicaragua). Baby ended up being a blighted ovum, and I had a D&C on September 23. I've had two periods now since the miscarriage ... we strictly avoided for one because I had to get my MMR booster (found out during prenatal appointments I wasn't immune to rubella anymore).

In other words, we were never "TTC" but more of "TT whatever" ... and it is hard to say for how long ... 2-3 months, then pregnant, and we haven't beeing trying or whatever since the miscarriage.

So, we're still unsure what we're doing. That's just life, right? Heh.

Comment edited on: 11/15/2011 12:21:10 PM

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NIKIBOBIKI 11/15/2011 8:25AM

    Have you spoken to him about the fact that if it would take another year to pay off the loan, getting pregnant right now wouldn't be a big deal? I find that my hubby to be, when thinking about conceiving, thinks of it as RIGHT NOW and when I remind him that a pregnancy lasts 9 months, he relaxes. He has also noticed as friends of ours have thier babies / announce thier pregnancies just how long it actually is between conception and actual baby time. He's like "wow, it seems like so and so has been pregnant forever!"
Perhaps if you let him know that you don't mind not TRYING to conceive, but you aren't comfortable TTA, he will just let it go to chance. Maybe by relaxing about it, and just enjoying each other again, you will actually concieve! How long have you been TTC?
Good luck with it! emoticon

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YOITLE 11/15/2011 12:50AM

    I'm no holy spirit, but perhaps let the issue rest for a week or so, to see what does come in. It sounds like you are trying to put yourself in his shoes, so in a week or so, see what you can say to him to let him know you understand his position and feelings. Sometimes that can be an opening.

I got married at 38 and my husband was 35. I told him when we were engaged that I had no idea if I could get pregnant. Four months later I did get pregnant and had my first son at 39 and a half. I wanted to space my kids, so that I could really develop a relationship with the first before a new baby came into the family even though my age was really over the hill. Once my husband and I decided to give it another go, it took about a year and a half to conceive and I had my second child at 43. We did a lot of communicating around these issues even though he doesn't speak English and my Japanese wasn't up to much at that time.

Don't know if any of this helps, but in these kinds of issues, what is said today may change tomorrow.

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And scale victories ...

Friday, November 11, 2011

Well, after being stuck at 187.6 for what seemed like forever, I got up this morning and found myself at 185. And my clothes have suddenly seemed significantly looser this week. To top it off, my husband can see a difference.

Tomorrow I plan to do my last day of week 4 C25K. It took me a little longer to finish this week, because I wasn't always able to use the treadmill and sometimes had to supplement with elliptical and didn't want to move on until I had a solid week of running. Not nearly as nervous about week 5 now! I think I'm starting to enjoy it.

TMI/female information:

I'm waiting for my period to start. I'm actually a little bit tired of waiting. I should be excited, because this is a nice solid cycle for me, indicating things are back to normal and going great following everything that happened in the last few months. But I'm a little down because we would have been finding out our little one's gender about now. So I really want to get on with getting back to "possibly" getting pregnant. Especially since having a slightly longer than usual luteal phase makes me think things like "What if we somehow got pregnant? What if this isn't just my typical luteal phase nausea??" Ugh. I hate overanalyzing ... I really just want to relax. And I think I will once my period starts.

Plus - frankly - I've been good all week, and would really like to have a drink or two with my husband tonight. But I can't until I rule out the very slim possibility that we got pregnant.

Six pounds total down! That IS exciting! I want to be excited!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MCJULIEO 11/12/2011 10:09AM

    Hang in there- we're rooting for you!

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JONICACALDWELL 11/11/2011 6:48PM

    emoticon on the weight and the running. Waiting for my period too, also wish I was pregnant...

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YOITLE 11/11/2011 6:29PM

    Your body is healing, and you are taking good care of it. Surely this will lay the groundwork for achieving your dreams.

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BEVSMOSS 11/11/2011 4:58PM


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Non-Scale Victories

Tuesday, November 01, 2011

I need to focus on non-scale victories. Because for some reason the weight just isn't coming off. I've seen as low as 185.2 in the last few weeks, but the last few mornings I keep getting 187.6 staring at me.

I've adjusted my goals. There is NO way I am getting to 145 by our first anniversary. I'll be lucky if I can get to 170 at the rate I'm going.

I KNOW I know I know in my head that it is possible C25K is building muscle in place of fat ... and I DO "think" my clothes are a little looser - but I didn't start out taking body measurements so I can't quantify that. I need to start that. I think what is holding me back from doing the measurements is that I'm afraid they won't change from where they are now.

So in light of not giving up, and not getting discouraged, I need to list a few positives:

- I'm still doing C25K ... today I ran for five minutes in one shot.

- I DO feel better/more confident MOST of the time ... as long as I stay away from the scale or magazines/ads.

- I've almost earned a new pair of running shoes!

- If I really am building muscle, the weight will eventually begin to change. I just need to be patient.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

YOITLE 11/1/2011 11:04PM

    It doesn't matter when you start using the tape measure. It's there to help reflect the body's changes. I rely on those measurements and the body scanner results on my scale to tell me what is happening with the % of body fat. Even when the weight number as barely budged, I've been watching my fat % slowly and steadily decline.

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MCJULIEO 11/1/2011 10:36PM

    Go take those measurements NOW!!!!

(One of my greatest regrets is not taking measurements from the beginning!)

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INKEDPETALS45 11/1/2011 1:06PM

    Non-scale victories are some of the BEST victories! The scale doesnt factor in water retention, that time of the month, muscle mass, etc. Keep staying positive. It will come off before you know it! emoticon

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ANNONYMOUSME 11/1/2011 9:56AM

Non-scale victories are what keep me going! And not just measurements, I celebrated when I could finally cross my legs comfortably too. It has to be things that are important to you. I still weigh myself, but the scale is not the determining factor in how successful I feel, and it doesn't have to be for you either.

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GOOSIEMOON 11/1/2011 9:21AM

    Non-scale victories are so important! You're doing great!

Keep up the good work!

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MISSBLUEBIRD 11/1/2011 9:19AM


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Finally found a 5K ...

Friday, October 28, 2011

So, I'm still doing my Couch to 5K workouts ... after tomorrow morning, I'll have one more week till I "earn" my new running shoes!!

Someone asked me what 5K I was training for, and I was thinking "The 5K I'll run several times each week, duh!" but I've read and heard a lot lately about how much people enjoy running races and how motivating it is.

Well, I think I found a 5K that will be fun to run! I may even be able to get my brother and dad to do it with me! It is a long ways off, a year from when I'll finish C25K ... but it sounds AWESOME!

Yesterday I got "Love Bombed" on my regular blog. I had written about my miscarriage, and someone nominated me to this organization (that I'm now part of too) who "bombs" someone's blog/etc with loving messages each Thursday.

What great timing! I attended the first baby shower since the miscarriage today, and being flooded with kindness from people who read my story yesterday made me feel bolstered and ready. Such a very "Sparking" website! One of my dear coworkers checked on me afterwards too - that meant the world to me.

We're doing ok with the one car thing. Today was the tough day ... hubby got home with the car at 7:30am ... I got to work at 8:15 ... normally with a 1 hour lunch I'd leave at 5:15 ... but hubby need to leave again for his job at 5:15, so I needed to GET HOME at 5:15. So I took a short lunch.

OH! And I didn't even WANT to gluttonously ravage the offerings at the shower. I indulged in a few chips and some guac, lots of raw veggies, and a bite of banana pudding rather than letting the person closest to the bowl ladle out about a pound like he was for everyone else. Booyah! I did indulge in a donut this morning ... but I had planned for that. I think the Spark is catching on in me!!!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MCJULIEO 10/29/2011 4:26PM

    Fantastic sparking! Isn't it amazing how it gives us such encouragement!

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JENN5IFER 10/29/2011 2:16PM

    Great job

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YOITLE 10/29/2011 3:48AM

    You are firing on all cylinders. Way to go!

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JONICACALDWELL 10/28/2011 8:26PM

    Nice job! With everything! emoticon emoticon

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