Tuesday, August 16, 2011
I tracked it and all my food all day and I was golden, baby!
Even with lasagna, even with Garlic bread!!
Then MIL pulls a chocolate cream pie out of the frig (OJIBWEEQUAY, did you CALL HER???).
Yea, I ate it and yea, I went over my calories and fat. Who cares. I dont do that very often and I dont regret it.
Sorry I made you all crazy for lasagna. I bet you can all come up with a delicious recipe that wont even make you feel guilty!
I put the rest of it in the freezer so I can have some more in another 3 months!. God I hope I dont think about it till then!
You say I make you laugh, well you guys crack me up on a daily basis. I love that about us!
Monday, August 15, 2011
Last night, I made a lasagna so we can take it to Frank's Grandma today. We are going to see how she is doing and if there is anything we can do to make her safe since I do not think my MIL will be staying much longer and I dont think she is going home with her. I called the newspaper to have them deliver it to her door instead of up her 20' steep driveway and am working on getting the mail delivered to her door too, but ya know, these things take time.
Anyway, so I made a lasagna last night. Lean ground beef, lots of cheese (2% but still) and it smelled so good! I made it after I had eaten dinner so smelling simmer sauce for hours was setting me up! I made one for home too, since I cant make just 1 little pan of it). The kids were all gone all weekend (and it was sooooo nice!!!) but they both converged on us at the same time along with Kady's boyfriend and 17 year old sister right as I was cooking the lasagna. They were hungry (big surprise) so they ate some that I had made for our house.
"OMG, MOM, this is SOOOO good" (still smelling that shizzle!!)
"This is the BEST you ever made" (I am drooling now but still in my chair)
"Is this all there is? Did you make more for us??" (Ok I am up and in the kitchen now)
I had 2 bites. It was delicious!! So all night, I resisted to go eat some more. I woke up at midnight and I could still smell it (cause they were microwaving it for 2nds) and I woke up looking at it this morning.
All day I have been thinking about eating it. I had my usual Luna Bar for breakfast, had some fruit about noon, going in soon to have a sandwich but really, all I want is that stupid lasagna. It is ridiculous the power it has over me. It is crazy to be thinking about this in the back of my mind while I am working. I literally can NOT wait for dinner. It is haunting me!
I am happy I havent caved and eaten some but it is horrible that I am looking forward to it that much. I guess I need to accept the fact that I love food, I always will and that is the way it is. If it was cookies, I would never have lasted this long, so that is something I guess.
Did I mention how much I am looking forward to dinner tonight? Oh. I did? Sorry if I am repeating myself but I am just soo looking forward to dinner tonight... damn. I did it again. I hope you guys enjoy your dinner tonight as much as I am going to. Ya know, eating that lasagna I made and all. Yep, yep. Really gonna be good. mmm, mmm, mmm. Lasagna. ME. Tonight. We have a date. A dinner date.
Wherever you are, between 5 and 6 tonight in California, Jan is gonna be a happy girl. Cause I will be eating Lasagna. That I made. For dinner. Tonight. Yep. Tonight. Lasagna and Me. Together.
Have a good day. I will cause I know that later, at dinner, I will be eating Lasagna.
Thursday, August 11, 2011
This isnt about weight loss so feel free to skip it. It's about me and Gramma.
My hubby's grandma is 94. I am 49 (for another month anyway). She lives alone and does pretty well. She fell on sunday and ended up in the hospital. We went to see her straight from coming off a 5 day camping trip and she stayed in the hospital for 2 nights. I went to see her again on Monday. There was nobody else to do it. One SIL moved across country last week, another SIL and MIL were camping (and were not going to give up their plans to come. I wont get started on THAT since it is Grandma's DAUGHTER!) and Hubby had a big roofing project we HAD to start on Monday. SO that left me.
Now see, I beleive in family. You do what you gotta do and when someone needs you, you GO. That is how I was raised. That is what we always did so it didnt seem weird for me.
I have been in this family for 25 years and I have known them for 35! Grandma and I have always been friendly but not close. She can be kind of, um, how should I put it? Mean? lol.
Anyway, she was hurt and vulnerable so I stayed with her monday and helped her out at the hospital, updating the family via texting. Tuesday they released her so I took her home (in my giant red truck!!) and stayed over night.
Frank kept apologizing for me having to stay and thanking me for doing it.
I took bottled water, a book, a few luna bars and figured I would be fine.
Let me just say this about old people. If we all ate like them, we would be super thin! I looked in the frig and the cabinets and said, "OMG! IM gonna starve to death here!" Then I texted Frank and told him to bring me a bottle of captain and a bag of potato chips.. He just laughed at me! Oh well, I was gonna have to get through this so at lunch, she wanted a sandwich.
Here is the recipe:
1 slice of Potato bread (been in the frig for at least a week) toasted (because otherwise you could not possibly eat it!)
1 slice of very thin deli, prepackaged turkey. (the kind you can see through!)
1/2 a slice of provolone
3 mini caramel rice cakes
(It was too much for her and she couldnt finish it and did not eat the rice cakes).
Anyway, I took care of her all day and saw things I can't share with you cause I dont want to give you nightmares but let me just say, I am changed forever.
I hope I am that "free" with my body at 94. Hell, I wish I was NOW! (I know I used to be at 19 but that was a different time).
Frank called me at 4 and said he was coming to visit and I was soo happy cause he said he would bring dinner. The thought of sharing a pepperoni hot pocket was NOT appealing. Good thing she has a sweet tooth cause she has a freezer full of the cookies I make her (she eats 1 a day) and I was gonna just sit down with a zippy bag and go to town on 'em).
He came and brought a rottiserie chicken and some mac and cheese ( I actually was looking forward to some sort of veggies but that was not to be) and we had dinner together. (she could not even finish a drumstick and she ate literally 3 peices of macaroni!). He also bought a lemon cream pie (her favorite). That little woman perked up like the sun had just came out and she asked for a "little peice". As I was cutting a tiny peice (based on how much she eats), she told me "well, make it a little bigger!" so she ate a normal slice of pie...hmmmm, seeing a pattern here. Real food, um no. Sweets? YES PLEASE!!!
So finally Frank left and I got her in her pajama's and she told me it was time to watch tv so we got settled in and she turned it on. NOPE. It didnt work. SO I tried. NOPE. There was no power to the TV. She starts telling to call the cable company and I was trying to figure out the problem. Anyway, long story short, I had to firmly explain that I was QUITE capable of handling the situation and since the tv in kitchen worked it was not a cable issue and they would not be able to help.
So she finally settled down and I went to work. Ultimatly, I called Frank and he told me to hook up an extension cord and he would fix it when he came back in a day or so and that is what we did. She was so happy we got it going.
So we could watch "little house on the prarie" till 9:00 when the news comes on and she could watch the weather. And then it happened.
Gramma: Are you tired?
Me: Not really, are you tired, Gramma? You have had a long day!
Gramma: well, I go to bed after the weather.
Me: Ok, well I can help you to bed
Gramma: Ok, turn off that light, the tv (blah blah blah)
Me to self: HOLY CRAP! She is making ME go to BED! I wanna get my laptop and spark! What the hell!?
Me to Gramma: Ok well lets get you in bed
When I got her settled, and I was in my twin bed with 14 blankets on it, I decided to just read instead and then Kelly started texting me and we were laughing about everything that had happened. She told me thought I was wonderful to do this and she loved me. I went to sleep happy.
Till 12:30 when I heard Gramma clumping around with her walker (after I gave her strict instructions to not get up without me!) took her to the bathroom and went back to bed till 6:30.
Made coffee for her (instant) but I did it wrong cause I didnt use the kettle on the stove, I microwaved it (she had never done that in her life! But she said it was good...lol). Then breakfast, one scrambled egg and 1 peice of toast and jam.
Then I got her dressed and we sat at the kitchen table and I asked what she usually does so we paid a couple of bills and then we talked and talked. I am sure it was refreshing for her because everyone else in her life has heard all her stories and I have fresh ears and was interested. It was really nice.
Her daughter ( my MIL) was coming that morning to take her to doctor on Thursday. In Gramma's words, "Finally, she is coming! I am mad at her. She didnt care to come when I was in the hospital. Camping was more important. I wish you could stay. You have taken such good care of me and you know just what to do. She wont do it right!!I will just be quiet and pretend my feelings are not hurt).
SO at 11, my MIL got there and I filled her in on everything. I got a weird vibe but too bad. I really dont care. A, I did it for Gramma and B, I was going home so booyah!
At 12, Gramma wanted lunch so I said I was going. She was so upset I wasnt going to eat lunch first and I kept refusing so she said I had to take a cookie at least! So I told her she was bad for me and we laughed. I hugged her goodbye, (it lasted for 5 minutes) and she cried and thanked me so much for being there and she loved me and she didnt know how she would get by without me).
I hugged her back, got teary, told her I loved her, would come anytime she needed me and that she was going to be allright) and then I drove away.
I went to taco bell, got 2 fresco taco's and a diet pepsi, ate it driving over the bridge and called Frank. I felt such freedom! (and a little sad. I am actually gonna miss her!!) and drove home. SOO happy to see my girls and of course, my Stitchy.
We are so worried about what is going to happen and Frank has been trying to have a conversation with his mom about her but all we get is "we will see" and other blow off comments so I am not sure what is going to happen. I know she should not be alone but I really dont have any say in the situation.
I learned alot about Gramma and she learned alot about me. No matter what ever happens, I am going to treasure my time with her. It was precious and special. I will have wonderful memories of her to look back on and I got to know her in a way that many others people in the family wont.
This is probably not the last time I will need to be there for her and that's ok. I will know better what to bring next time and maybe I can make her something for dinner she might actually WANT to eat. On the plus side, I lost all my weekend weight plus another pound so the GRAMMA DIET works!
And one final thought,
Little house on the prairie was a pretty good show, actually.
Monday, August 08, 2011
I just read your comments from my status when I left for camping about behaving and it made me laugh. You guys know me so well!! We had a fantastic time! I got there Weds am early and met a few of my buddies and we were lu cky enough to score our favorite camping spot in this great little cove that is pretty private but with lots of space which we needed because I think we had about 50 people at the highest count.
Kady came and brought 10 friends, Kelly came with about 5, there was various tents, trailers, campers, family, friends, kids everywhere! Assorted mayhem and chaos. I love it.
I was a bit concerned about brining Stitch because last time, she was very overwhelmed with too many (friends) dogs so this time, I just told everyone to keep the dogs leashed. There was only 1 there when we got there, a sweet, fat lab named Bud. So I kept them away from each other and then we went for a walk with the two of them and when we got back, they were best friends. The wrestled and played and went on the boat. Then only 1 other dog came on friday so we had no doggie drama which was great and everyone had fun.
I drank (alot) of Captain but I kept away from the deadly conconcotions the kids were making (smoothies with vodka) and during the day, I just refilled the guys cups and kept myself busy.
I towed a mess of kids around the lake on the tube for hours every day and we had so much fun.
Evenings? Well, that was adult drinking time and we danced and laughed and had so much fun. It was a great time. Here is a picture of my neices, daughters and a few of the girl's friends. It kinda represents the weekend, rofl.
As we were packing up sunday am, we got a call that Frank's 94 year old grandma had fallen and was in the hospital. We are the closest family members so we came home and dropped off the RV and the boat and headed to see her (she is about an hour and a half away). She was slurry, and bruised and had started a new medication that they beleive is the cause of the problem and they kept her overnight. I will go back there this morning to be with her (Frank has to go to work) and so hopefully, she will be better and be able to go home.
By the time we got home at 9:30 last night, we were exhausted and just fell into bed. I HAD to come and check on you guys so wanted to update you with what was what. Yea, I am up those same 4 pounds I usually am after a weekend involving alcohol but I will get those off and move forward.
Hope you guys are all well and I will be back online more in the next few days. Love y'all!
Monday, August 01, 2011
I survived the weekend with Hubby's family which is usually a eating fest but it went great. I came home .2 oz less! I count that as a victory. I took lunch for saturday (tritip, pasta salad with fat free italian and lots of veggies and a huge fruit salad) but Friday night we went to Pizza at this fabulous, famous pizza place. I had a salad and 2 peices and the in the morning when we went shooting, I went for a 30 minute walk, all by myself.
and then sunday,I made breakfast and went for a walk with Frank and then we headed out to a bridal shower for my nephew's fiance. Someone called us the peanut gallery. Hmmmmmmm.
This is my neice Stacy, my SIL Ranee, my neice Monica, My SIL Dana, My great niece Sami and my MIL Tommie and me (of course).
We had a good weekend. Still reeling a bit from the passing of Frank's dad. There is a lot of emotion there and Dana is moving to Georgia with her boyfriend so there is a lot going on but we had a great weekend.
Got home last night and then Wednesday, we are leaving to go camping until sunday (yes I will have my laptop and be tracking. ).
Hope you all had a good weekend and welcome to AUGUST! My goal for AUGUST is to be 219. That is 5 pounds and will get me out of the dreaded 220's and get me closer to 75 pounds down and within striking distance of weighing less than my hubby! (He is between 208-213) so I am ready to rock this month!! Totally do-able!
Oh yeah. my blouse is BILLOWY, not my stomach! lol...
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