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MAMADWARF's Recent Blog Entries
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Wednesday, November 03, 2010
Today I went to CVS(Aka Longs. Its a pharmacy, Cleva! LOL).. Is it around the corner from my house and I am probably there every day for one thing or another. A quick food item or cat food, cleaners whatever. Anyway, I went in, got my few things and was in line behind an eldery gentleman. Probably well into his 80's with his cane and he is asking the clerk for hearing aid batteries.
The young man turns away, pointing in the direction of the hearing aids. What he didnt realize is, as soon as he turned away, that old guy could not hear him. So, and I give him credit for this, He tells the old guy he will take him over there and tells me he will be right back to which I said "take your time". Now there are a few people in line behind me, the clerk comes back and starts ringing me up before I could tell him to take care of the old guy who is now about 3 deep in line. I pay for my stuff and the old guy leans over and asks the Clerk if there are any other hearing aid batteries. Clerk: No thats all we have.
I am in that store every day. I know exactly where the batteries are by the pharmacy. I notice them because my mom was deaf.
So I get the old guys attention and I say:The Batteries are right down that aisle. By the pharmacy" and I pointed him in the right direction.
He wandered off a few aisle from where I pointed, the clerk kept helping other people and I realized that I could not let him go looking around by himself. So I parked my cart, went after the guy, got his attention, took him over to the batteries then helped him select the right ones. He thanked me, still kinda of confused and I walked him back to the line and left the store.
I wanted to cry. My parents both died before they got to his age. 16 years ago my mom died. She was only 68 and was very spunky, way too young to be gone. 4 years ago, I lost my dad. He was 82, still walked and went to the gym every day and never met a woman he didnt think was beautiful in one way or another. He was starting to show his age tho and would get rattled sometimes.
I would like to think, had they lived longer, someone would have helped them in the store. It is funny how things trigger such emotions in us isnt it? I know every one of you would have helped that old guy today, it was nothing special, but in a way, it made me feel closer to my parents and made me miss them. Alot.


Wednesday, November 03, 2010
I was wondering today what the average calories for a "normal" Thanksgiving meal would be. I found between 2000-6000 calories! So my next step was to log what I figured an average Thanksgiving meal for me might be this year. I came up with about 900 calories. For the meal, not the whole day. Take a look at what I figured:
Turkey, fryer-roasters, light meat, meat only, roasted, 1 cup, chopped or diced 196 0 2 42
Bread stuffing, bread, 3 oz 151 18 7 3
KFC Mashed Potatoes With Gravy, 1 serving 140 17 5 1
White Dinner Rolls Rhodes Bake N Serv 1 roll, 2 serving 200 38 4 4
Butter, salted, 2 pat (1" sq, 1/3" high) 72 0 8 0
French's French Fried Onion, 2 tbsp 45 3 4 0
Green Beans (snap), 0.5 cup 17 4 0 1
*98% fat free cream of mushroom soup, 0.25 cup 35 5 1 1
Cranberry Sauce, canned, 1 slice (1/2" thick, approx 8 slices per can) 86 22 0 0
Dinner TOTALS: 942 107 31 52
This does not include breakfast, pie, Ham, pumpkin bread (OH Man, the pumpkin bread!!) This also does not include snacks (chips and dips usually which I can substitute baked chips and low fat dips and a veggie tray, probably deviled eggs will be in attendance). It also does not include the later in the night turkey sandwich.
So I need a plan. Heck, we ALL Need a plan!
Really, the only thing I see I would be willing to cut is only having 1 roll and I can have plain green beans as well as less stuffing. That takes it down about 200 calories. My current calorie range is between 1350 and 1650 a day.
I will stay away from alcohol and drink water and then we traditionally go for a walk so that should help. I will also drink a SOBE zero cause they make me full and they taste good. I will also do some sort of fruit (maybe turn it into a desert). That evening, we always end up at the Movies so I have gotten pretty good at just enjoying the show without having to eat popcorn (Maybe I will bring my own 100 calorie bag if I am feeling munchy).
One thing my bad day taught me the other day is I cannot eat like I used to. Nor do I want to.
I just want to at least have a plan in place. What is your plan? What is your weakness during this day of food? How are you gonna handle the upcoming holiday?


Monday, November 01, 2010
So I woke up feeling crummy from my cold. I have had it for a few days but had been feeling ok until today. Came out to my office and the phone calls began and the stuff that needed to be done just kept getting higher and higher. Couple that with a 30 minute wait time to my health care company who then promptly disconnected me during a transfer sent me into the house for some chips. I ate a small bag (150 calories). Came back out to tackle more frustrating stuff and it has become a day of getting nowhere slowly!
Text from daughter 1 crying at work cause people were rude to her, daughter 2 stomping out to loudly complain about daughter 1, (sent packing back into the house with instructions to "get over it"), cat fight in the yard (Yes, real cats not the girls. One of mine and someone else's).
Finally I went in for lunch. Heated up some soup and a grilled cheese which normally I would have had one or the other but said screw it, am having both! Intended to eat both cups of soup but could only eat half... couldnt even BINGE right today! (of course is binging on soup really binging?)
Then ate a 80 calorie sugar free cookie even though I was full.
You know what? I tried to go back to my old ways today. I really did. What it proved to me is I am not the same, I do not react the same, and the things I found comforting before are not the same.
The only thing that is working is crossing things off my list. With each check mark, the stress is lifting and that feels better than cookies do. Boy, I never thought I would say that.
Maybe I will really go wild tonight and eat a bunch of fruit or something! Maybe even a fat free pudding! Hey, dont try to stop me... I am wild! Untamed! Unstoppable! Just you move out of my way and watch me go... Yeah, probably for a walk. And not to a bar either.
Pshhhhh what the heck happened to me?

Sunday, October 31, 2010
This is what 54 pounds in 7.5 months looks like on me.
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