Friday, October 22, 2010
4 Places you have lived:
Pacific Grove, California
(haven't gone far have I?)
Movies you have watched more than once?
Gone with the wind
Night at the Roxbury
4 Jobs you have had:
Cook/waitress in coffee shop
Office work for a recycling center
Office work for our Roofing company
4 Places you have been that your remember vividly:
Hospital with people I love
Punk rock shows with my girls
Vernal, Utah (many times)
Pacific Grove (many times)
4 favorite foods:
Home made cookies
Fresh french bread with butter
4 favorite foods since sparking:
Basa fish filets
Fresh fruit salad
4 Unique things others may not know about you:
I am a fantastic puppeteer
I survived being widowed at age 19
I am hilarious (and also my own best friend)
My husband is the first man I ever slept with
4 Lessons that were hard for you to learn:
That because I thought about something, I did not make it happen
That as hard as I want to save someone, I dont have the power
That my kids will not always need me like they did
That life is not all about me
4 favorite TV shows:
4 places you would love to be right now:
Pacific Grove, California
4 things you hope to accomplish in the next 4 months:
Lose 20 more pounds (minimum)
Ability to help my kids in the next few months.
Share your answers with me if you have time. I am always interested in learning more about you! (thanks Robin!)
Wednesday, October 20, 2010
(Please look up the word: sarcasm before beginning this blog)
He is really a bastard. So selfish. I mean, all he can think of is himself.
Like how my weight loss benefits him. As an example, because I have lost 50 pounds, he gets to go Kayaking. Because I am smaller, HE had more room in the double bed we slept on in Utah. Because of MY healthier choices, he gets to eat better.
Because of my needing to walk, HE gets to come and be healthier too, then gets to spend time TALKING to me and connecting and unwinding instead of being met with a cranky, shut down wife.
Because I feel better, sex is better. I have more energy to go do stuff and feel more positive which benefits him since we work together. Then to top it off, I look better so people think he is lucky. I save him money when we go out cause I dont get the huge tub of popcorn at the movies or the expensive dinner with appetizer.
I will even get to live longer which is a huge benefit to him because come on, he will need caring for so now I will have to do it. And he is soo happy about all of this stuff, so proud cause it benefits him!
Cant believe I married such a man. Here I am struggling and working so hard. And what do I get? Him. Life. Health. Adventure. Man, that really sucks.
Wednesday, October 20, 2010
Yesterday, I was soo bad! I had a bunch of work stuff to do and my house needs attention and I just couldnt pull it together. I would work for awhile, then hit facebook or sparkpeople and I didnt get the stuff done that I needed to do.
So, at the end of the day, I made a master list of things that I need to do by the end of October which includes serious things like quarterly reports and mundane things that I NEVER do such as dentist appts and scheduling to have my tv repaired and my carpet cleaned.
I feel much more prepared to get things done now so I can cross them off and have that list completed. Now, instead of just thinking about all the things I need to do, I have concrete visualizations and I can make progress. Im sure I will have to add things to the list as I think of them but I fully intend to do be done with all of it, on time.
What have you been putting off doing? Big or small?
Monday, October 18, 2010
Disclaimer: I have a video but am having problems loading so we are gonna go with the still shots for now and I hope to be able to load the video eventually. ***
So I am standing at the bottom of a gorge in Utah, getting ready to do some fishing. I looked up at this walking path that goes all the way to the top of the mountain. I said to myself, "Damn that is crazy! Who goes up there??" Then a few minutes later, I looked again and I said, "I wonder if I could go up there?"
So then I said, "Ok what if I just went like halfway". I told my husband and friends I was gonna do it and then I just went! Took my camera and I started up.
As I went, I took pictures of how far I had gone already so you will be looking back down the trail that I went up.
And I kept going.
And I told myself "20 more steps, just 20 more"
And I kept taking pictures of how far I was from where I started.
And I felt my legs working hard to haul my ass up those stairs and I felt my lungs puffing trying to suck in enough air at 11000 feet and I kept going. I wanted to see what was around the next corner and I wanted to see if I could keep going.
And I kept looking at how far I came and that kept pushing me to go farther.
And then, I got really close to the top and there were about 20 more steps to go. I wanted to stop, to say "That is close enough. You did great. Way more than I thought you could do!" But I kept going because I wanted to know that I could. I felt that good enough isn't good enough anymore.
And then I was there. At the top. All alone. And it felt fantastic. So I set up my camera on a rock and I set my timer and I took a picture of me wayyyy up on this mountain and I took a picture of myself. For me. For you. For all of us.
Because when you wonder if you can do it, if you can keep going, if you think you can only go halfway but then keep going past there, when you have a mountain in front of you and choose to tackle it, when you can look back at how far you have come, I want you to remember something: YOU CAN.
When you find yourself between a rock and a hard place, remember: YOU CAN!
I haven't wondered what I could do for a long, long time. I shut myself down before I even tried. I would not have even thought about trying it! But I wondered if I could and then I did it and it was WONDER-FUL! I amazed myself today. I amazed my husband and my friends. My body amazed me! I wonder what else I can do?
Saturday, October 16, 2010
My final two days in Utah. Heading home tomorrow am. I will blog while I am on the 14 hour drive home tomorrow because you will NOT beleive what I did!(Maybe I will do it tonight, we shall see ;) )
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