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MALEXANDER4's Recent Blog Entries

6: Always questions but nobody wants the answer

Wednesday, April 27, 2011

I normally walk during part of my lunch hour. Most sit and chat, I sit and eat and then get up with my water bottle and hit the road. Litterally. I walk for as long as I can. Sometimes it is 30 minutes and I have had quick walk of less then 20 minutes but I do this daily. It is both good for me and very relaxing. I always get stopped either on my way out or in from work and questions begin.....how far do you walk? do you do this everyday? I see you walking out there and man I really need to start.....how much weight have you lost? are you almost done? I patiently answer each question but my answers are always the same and most of the time they just say things like "Im not dertermind like you", " i don't like to walk alone", "I need someone to push me", and my favorite " what do you mean your not done? Your so skinny you don't need to exercise".

Ok, first off people you have to exercise and eat right to get it off but you have to also exercise and eat right to keep it off. Yup i'm skinny because i keep doing what i'm doing. There again, i've said this a million times, is no "magic pill", sorry it doesn't exist. what you see now took two years in the works. This was no overnight success story and still isn't. I have struggles, I don't always like to walk alone either, I don't always want to count each calorie or point as i'm used to that enters my mouth but I have and I do. I have one person telling me because of this plateau i'm on to just quit until after my daughters wedding and then worry about "dieting" again. I mean what is that about. You can't just quit a healthy lifestyle. Why can't anyone who is not on the journey not understand this isn't about dieting, it is about living. i want to live everyday not just one day.

So I continue on this journey alone except when I come to spark, Here I have friends that understand, people who know where i'm coming from, and people who push me to keep going not tell me to stop. I have never heard anyone here say " oh just quit for a while and come back when the stress is over". Really and when would be a good time to come back? When i'm back where I began, or better yet...over where I started. sounds kinda funny when you put it like that now doesn't it people? Nope I just continue on this journey the way i'm going. Living my life like i'm already there.

Michelle.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

JUNEBUG1944 4/28/2011 7:04PM

    We know that this is a lifestyle, not a diet, not something you do when you feel like it.

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BELIEVING-N-ME 4/27/2011 4:36PM

    Loved your blog! It's so true. I have to do it alone, too. That one of the reason I love SP, here everyone know what you are going through aand support you. Keep it up, you're doing great!

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ITSAWRAP_DIMI 4/27/2011 12:21PM

    That is sooooo real!! Loved your blog today. People NEVER tell you you need to exercise or loose weight but they are soooooooooooooooooooo quick to say you are too skinny or you don't need to exercise. WTH!!!(heck heheheh)

Keep on keepin on my sistah!!! You should get a tshirt with all the answers so they can read it and leave you to your walking. But on a serious tip you are planting seeds my dear!!!!

XOXOXO

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HAPPYSINGLEGMA 4/27/2011 10:38AM

    great Blog and very encouraging for someone who is just " getting it" herself.

When we are in denial we dont really listen or see the facts do we ? I have known all my life not to over eat and to excersise but I didnt always do that and that's why I am over weight.You see, as my friends work out and lose weight and I see them do that I know what there doing to lose it and I also know that its hard work and I am proud of them. When I hear a co-worker say " Why is she losing weight and not me ? I eat healthy I go for walks !" I know there just in Denial. But what we are doing is setting a great example for them . If they ever get out of denial they will remember us,they will have an AHA moment. Denial is a horrible thing to live with !
But we are NOT in denial , we know what works and what doesnt. So keep up the fabulous work my SP friend .You are an Inspiration for me !
Elaine

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MOUNTAINS2CLIMB 4/27/2011 10:04AM

    Hmmm..interesting concept..stop being healthy when you are stressed?? My my...isn't that what got a lot of us here in the first place?? wow! And do you do this each time you are stressed?? Give up?? WHAT DO SOME PEOPLE THINK??? Nevermind..they don't.
Stress as you know, is NOT going to go away, so why make yourself feel even WORSE giving up your healthy habits? HELLO people..exercis is GOOD for stress...okay okay..I am about going to get as riled up as you over that one! heehee!
Michelle, you keep doing what you are doing. Maybe you won't see much of a change over the next couple weeks, but you keep doing what you know is healthy for you. your daughter's wedding is going to be beautiful and you are going to one proud mama! Just remember we want pics! :)

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KRICKET4 4/27/2011 9:58AM

    " oh just quit for a while and come back when the stress is over"
emoticon emoticon emoticon

Just wanted to make sure somebody on SP says that to you :) Just couldn't resist...

I wonder, is it that people are lazy or is it that they don't trust in their own abilities? Maybe a little of both.

Keep walking, keep talking, there really isn't much more you can do to convert a non-believer.

Have a wonderful SparkDay, my friend.

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5: My hubby brought Krispee Kremes in the house!!!

Tuesday, April 26, 2011

emoticonYou guys thought me throwing out the cake was surprising wait till he sees what I do with those sugary messess. I bought two boxes from the school and told the girl I bought them from to keep them, I would buy but I didn't want the donuts. Her kids could have them I said. Oh she thanked me and i'm sure hated me at the same time....two kids + too much sugar....you get the pic. Anyhow, one of the ladies forgets I said to keep them and doesn't hubby show up to my work at the same moment....he takes a box. Man I could of strangled him right there. We had already discussed this but I think he forgot that part...the sugar calls out to him like that cake calls to me. lol. He had two. Now they sit. I know in a day or so they will be at the bottom of the garbage with the cake.

emoticonToday marks day five on staying on track. I have so much stress right now with my daughters wedding in another week and so much left to do I had told myself I would just relax myself about reaching goals and such for this last couple of weeks. Well it must be ingrained because I can't do it. The water, fruits, veggies, and exercise comes so naturally I just do it. Now sleep? I'm working on that. When I stress that is the one place that suffers and like the domino effect it works on my lossess and gains. So I may not see any changes in me the next couple of weeks but i'm not out of the game....just sitting on the bench for a bit to catch my breath. I'm glad I have spark to come to and such great friends i've made here to vent to when I need to. This site has become a lifesaver to me.

So today I will begin day 5 with much confidence i'll see day 6.

Michelle.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

IUHRYTR 4/28/2011 8:09PM

    It is too easy for people to allow one area of their life to overshadow another. Yes, there is a wedding coming up and, yes, many details need to be handled, but that should not affect your exercise and healthy eating. It sounds like you have that under control but many people keep telling themselves, "When the wedding's over, then I'll be able to focus and get back on track." When they do that they are allowing one aspect of their life to push aside another -- there weight loss efforts. Makes no sense to me. It is good to read that you are one of the few who keep the weight loss as a priority regardless of what else has to be done. There will always be something else to be done, right? -- Lou

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MOUNTAINS2CLIMB 4/27/2011 9:59AM

    These are times when I am soo thankful that the only person around here bringing food into the house is ME! haah~ a KK donut hasn't graced my countertop in ages!! :)
Hang in there...just keep throwing it out!!

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SLIMPAM23 4/26/2011 9:45PM

    I'm VERY proud of you....sticking to your guns when the stress is the worst. Good Job my friend!! I on the other hand totally caved with the stress of Mo's graduation - so.....because I am so proud of your self control - I am on my way up to your house to take those awful doughnuts right out of your house.....and into my tummy!!! Good Job Missy!! Goal is staring you in the face!
BIG HUGS!!
Pam

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JEGRANT 4/26/2011 8:29PM

    Sounds like you're really staying on track. Congratulations! It is very motivating to read about someone else keeping up their good habits, even when there are stressful events going on. I have been a little off track lately due to my birthday, Easter weekend and now I am on vacation! But your blog is inspiring me to get back into the swing of things, so thank you for that!

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ITSAWRAP_DIMI 4/26/2011 7:49PM

    WTG my friend!!! KK ummmmmmm I have not had one in AGES! ummmmmm

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JUNEBUG1944 4/26/2011 5:57PM

    That is an offense punishable by death! LOL! What was he thinking...oh wait, he probably wasn't thinking. Was he? They are building a KK store in Foley...good thing I like WalMart Donuts better...but I only eat them once in a blue moon!

Your willpower is great...I'd eat them in a flash and then regret it!

Calm down, take a deep breath, and relax. The wedding will be great...don't let it get to you!

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CAM2438 4/26/2011 5:46AM

    Sounds as though you are doing just great in spite of everything. Keep up the good work

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Day 3 : Its all in the planning

Monday, April 25, 2011

If you run into a wall, don't turn around and give up.
Figure out how to climb it, go through it, or work around it.
- Michael Jordan

emoticonI survived Easter. Oh I planned for that coconut cake I ate, I planned for the meal...which I may add was healthy because I prepared it. I planned for the whole day. It turned out wonderful. I had my cake and ate it too and woke up feeling like I had concured the world. Today is day 4 and I so hope I can report that it went according to plan also. I have a lot of left overs to eat my way through but lucky for me they are again healthy, and the coconut cake is sitting in the bottom of the trash can. I tossed that this morning. If it isn't there it isn't tempting me and calling out to me. I planned for the slice, not that whole thing.

I'm starting to see I need to work on me. I need to relax, take this one day at a time, see how far i've come and stop worrying about how far I have yet to go. These last five pounds have decided to stay for a while and even though I want them gone in another sense i'm seeing that I can do maintenance and that is ok also. I have to see my cup as half full and not empty. I have fallen into that "I need more all the time" thinking and I really don't like that in me much. So with Easter comes new beginnings and that for me is essential to keeping my head about me. I have a journey to complete. Not that it will be over, oh no, the next will just be beginning. Life is full of new beginnings it is how we handle each one the sets us apart.

Michelle.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

PUGLOVER1999 4/25/2011 7:32PM

    WOW! You threw away the rest of the coconut cake?????

I am IMPRESSED! I am AMAZED! I am ASTONISHED! I am INSPIRED! I hope I get to that point some day!

CONGRATULATIONS on getting through Easter dinner with a PLAN! What a great ACCOMPLISHMENT! What a great EXAMPLE!

My mouth is hanging open!
emoticon emoticon emoticon

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KRICKET4 4/25/2011 10:21AM

    You're absolutely right, we need to relax about this whole thing. I think if the head is in the right place, the rest will follow.
Congratulations on your successful Easter. (I don't think I've ever had coconut cake. Just as well, this way I don't know what I'm missing :))

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MOUNTAINS2CLIMB 4/25/2011 9:27AM

    emoticon Great mindset to be in!! You have come so very far and I'm glad you are taking the time to see that - to look behind you at what you have been able to do and be proud of that work. You've worked so very hard and this journey will never be over. We are constant works in progress, so applaud what you've accomplished and look with anticipation at what you will be able to accomplish next!!
Good planning for Easter..and good idea to get rid of the cake! I'm glad you enjoyed your day!!
emoticon

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ITSAWRAP_DIMI 4/25/2011 7:40AM

    Great!!!! I am glad to see you looking at your journey in a more positive light. This is HUGE! Now make that cup overflow!!! emoticon

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KENTUCKYWOMAN 4/25/2011 7:24AM

    Michelle, if I have learned one thing through out this journey it is....its not what we are eating, but what is eating at us....so many times it is nothing more than something deep inside that makes us turn to the food. Been there have many t-shirts to show for it.

I am so very proud of you, throwing away that coconut cake, that my dear took great strength and courage. YOU ROCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Love ya,
Joan

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ILOVELIFE2012 4/25/2011 7:22AM

    WOW! Wonderful mindset. Good for you!


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Day 2: Fresh beginning underway

Saturday, April 23, 2011

" Each journey begins but with a single step"

I have begun my journey to a new way of life. Well really I began this journey two years ago, I have gotten side tracked and fallen many times. I have straightened myself out and picked myself up many times also. This journey is all about changes, makeing better choices and just learning all about us. I would love to come here and tell ya I got it beat but to be honest i'm not there yet. This isn't about just losing weight. Shoot really anyone can do that...but can they keep it off? Now that is the question I want to be the one to answer 5, 10, or even 1 year from now. So besides losing the weight i'm trying to find out where my troubles lie, where my old habits would of taken me and where I still have to travel.

You see I have gotten so close to goal and then POOF it is gone. Like this week...I lost a good bit last week, this week I just ate and ate my way through it. It was like i couldn't get enough. Well today i'm up 3lbs by the scales....Did I eat three pounds of food no, but I am bloated, one of my rings in there for a bit because my fingers are swollen. So what have I learned from this week in foodville? I might not have made the wisest choices. After I got off the scales I had to just shake my head. Not at the number but at me. I did this to me. I have self sabataged myself so many times. Why? That is the question of the hour. So I decided yesterday I didn't like me much right now, my choices were doing nothing but hurting me and I needed better than that for myself. So i'm proud of me today. I began with a single step but I am now focused on my goals for today.

Giving in is not an option. There is a fear here and i'm going to figure out what that fear is.

Michelle.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

ITSAWRAP_DIMI 4/23/2011 1:58PM

    You are not alone! You learned a lot in foodville!

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KRICKET4 4/23/2011 12:43PM

    I'm proud of you today, too :) Keep up the good fight!

emoticon will beat emoticon today!

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KENTUCKYWOMAN 4/23/2011 11:15AM

    I like you everyday Michelle. As I have told you, I did the very same thing for years, I would get within 2 pounds of my goal only to sabotage myself. I think with me, I felt I was not worthy to hit goal, but you know what Michelle, I was more than worthy and so are you. Hang in there my Sweet Friend.

Hugs,
Joan

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NANA717 4/23/2011 8:56AM

    Great blog. If you get it figured out, share with all and you'll become a millionaire! :)

I'm enjoying your writing. I'm going to be following you, cheering you on, and hopefully we'll both have much success!!

Blessings!

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SAFARIBABE 4/23/2011 8:28AM

    I know part of the reason that I self sabotage is that change is scary. I know how life is the way I am now. To change is hard and I don't know how it is to live as a runner (I'm currently training for my first 5K) or how to live healthier (I'm 44 and have been eating unhealthily for many of those years). This time tho I'm looking at the changes as an adventure. Like traveling to a new place I've never been to before. I love to travel. So hopefully this mindset will work.

Good Luck to you!

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MARKDORENE 4/23/2011 7:04AM

    good luck

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Day 1...Fresh beginning

Friday, April 22, 2011

emoticonFinish each day and be done with it. You have done what you could...

- Ralph Waldo Emerson, writer

I have not finished this week off as I would like. So this morning I took it upon mysel to begin fresh. I have been so hungry this week I feel like i've gained 10 pounds. Though I know I have probably gained a bit or stayed the same. It doesn't stop the hating that goes on in my head. Oh I have beat myself up all week. But not today.Today I begin anew. That is what is wonderful about this journey we can begin anew any time we choose. So i'm choosing today. Today I have choices to make, cravings to concur, moments to outlast. Oh I know it can be done, I mean I've done it before. But for some reason the old habits come back to haunt me with a vengance.

So today I have a fresh new beginning. I will see success. I will have continued OP days. (OP is on point with WW) I will see my "magic number" on those pesky scales and I will learn to see the wonderful things I do for my body everyday that I continue on this journey. Whether it is at goal or still in the process each day I'm on the journey is a blessing to me and my body.

Michelle. emoticon

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

KRICKET4 4/22/2011 11:25AM

    I might come across as a loon... but here it goes:
Every time you're in danger of putting stuff in your mouth you didn't intend to and the snack monster is lurking yell at yourself "Suck it up!"

I've actually tried this and it works, but only if I yell it out loud (just thinking it in my head won't do the trick). Probably only a good idea when you're home alone :)

It brings me awareness as to how ludicrous my current want really is. How self-absorbed and how utterly childish.

I'm pretty sure you're not one of the ones on here who gets easily offended, so I feel safe leaving this post with you. If conventional wisdom worked, we'd be there already...

Have a successful day.



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MOUNTAINS2CLIMB 4/22/2011 11:13AM

    You can do it Michelle!! Hang in there, girl, we are going to do this!!!!


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CAKAROO 4/22/2011 10:00AM

    good luck with your new start

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CHINAGAL 4/22/2011 9:54AM

    Me too! Gotta love fresh starts and SP!
emoticon
Edna

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JAMARIGOLD 4/22/2011 9:04AM

    emoticon A new start is a great gift we give ourselves. It's amazing to me how rejuvenating a deep breath and a "begin again" can be.

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SMFISHER99 4/22/2011 7:28AM

    I love the quote. I have often used this philosophy with family and the teenagers I work with as it is so true. Good luck in your journey!!!

emoticon

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BUTTERFLYEMERGE 4/22/2011 7:26AM

    YOU CAN DO IT!!!! Wishing you the best today, Michelle!

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