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Why do I let me down?

Thursday, December 02, 2010

emoticonI seem to have this inner turmoil going on with myself. I had a "moment" last night. Not just any moment, I mean the moment from hell. I not only went to bed, then I got up out of bed three times. Not once, twice, but three dang times. I wrote it all down. Oh it didn't look too bad on paper or in the tracker, but inside myself it felt like crap.

I had the talk with myself this morning as I was trudging along on the treadmill. Why? Why is the question I asked me. I know I want to reach goal, I say I want to reach goal, but seems each time I get within a few pounds of the final number I gain a pound. I haven't weighed yet this week and I may not have done any damage at all. That is neither here nor there. The point is I did something i've been working on not doing for a long time. I had it down. I was going to bed with water and that was it. But nope, last night I allowed my mind to rule my body. I wasn't hungry, I was probably tired. I mean I was in bed reading. I should of turned out the light and let that me it.

I'm not beating myself up over this. dont think that. I"m not looking for a pat on the back, a "it is going to be ok", no I';m not needing any of that. This is strickly for me to look back on and see that I have come so far. I can't let one "moment" rule my life. I can have moments and still survive. I can have my cake on occasion and eat it too. Last night I don't know what I was thinking. I wasn't that is the problem. So today I move on. I have had the talk, i'm back on track. I know what I want and I won't let my little setbacks get in my way. this is life. My life, I intend to make it a good life for me. One that I can be proud of. You know what? I already am. I"m down 21 pounds. I've never done this. I've never given all I could for me. So i'm a winner even with the snack.


  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MOUNTAINS2CLIMB 12/2/2010 9:03PM

    You are going to do it. Just keep moving honey, you are doing fine.

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JUNEBUG1944 12/2/2010 8:45PM

    One mistake is not going to set you's just a minor delay. Sometimes we just need a break so we do what we shouldn't. You're going to reach your's right there in front of you...very can touch it...YOU WILL GRAB IT!

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ITSAWRAP_DIMI 12/2/2010 7:23PM


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IUHRYTR 12/2/2010 6:28PM

    Remember that you don't drive to work or anywhere else, stop at a red light, turn around and go back home. We wait out those minor delays, setbacks, and then continue on our way. Some days we have smooth driving and catch all of the lights on green. But regardless of the bumps or detours along the way, we eventually reach our destination. Hang in there and give it your best every day. Hit a snag one day? Overcome it and continue on. -- Lou

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SPARKYEG 12/2/2010 12:58PM

    We might always have "that one night" now and again, but you are pushing on. Keep it up.

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RACHD80 12/2/2010 12:49PM

    Thanks for sharing, I have been going through the same thing.

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New month/same plan

Wednesday, December 01, 2010

emoticontoday begins day one of the new month. Am I prepared? ready? sure? Well i'm sure i'm prepared but ready is something else. emoticonI just finished my game plan for the new month. I have got my goals on paper but i've also written how I intend to reach each one. Writing goals on paper is easy, it is following through I sometimes have trouble with. I have decided that I would enjoy a sensible snack after dinner instead of no snack. Saying no just seems to scream the word: EAT. I hate having to fight my mind some evenings when really I could just have some popcorn, piece of fruit, or even vegges with WW jalapeno cheese spread and that is awesome.

So my goals for the month and my plans to succeed are as follows:

1. Lose 3 pounds this month.
2. Sensible snacking after dinner.
3. Learn all I can about my new ww pointsplus program.

How i'm planning on accomplishing these goals:

1. Follow my pointsplus plan
2. Weigh, measure my foods
3. Exercise: change it up now and again
4. Buy only "safe" snacks.
4. Read, read, and read all I can on ww online to learn about the new plan.

Each goal is simple but will ultimately get me to where I want to be: Goal
I have a plan and a map, i'm ready for the new month.


  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MOUNTAINS2CLIMB 12/2/2010 11:05AM

    Your goals are great, you are determined, you are FABULOUS! And you can do this!

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JUNEBUG1944 12/1/2010 9:54PM

    You are so goal oriented! I don't see any walking in there, however. emoticon

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KNITTABLES 12/1/2010 8:59PM

    These goals and great and doable. I know you will succeed in all of them.

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ITSAWRAP_DIMI 12/1/2010 7:27PM

    emoticon that is you hitting your taget!!!!

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IUHRYTR 12/1/2010 4:20PM

    Having easily achievable intermediate goals gives us more opportunity to reach various goals and so boosts our confidence as we move on toward the next milestone. You will succeed. Your determination and self-confidence will not allow you to do otherwise. -- Lou

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Today began a new journey

Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Though no one can go back and make a brand new start, anyone can start from now and make a brand new ending.

~Carl Bard

today my WW plan took on a whole new look, feel, and agenda. they revamped and I'm going along with the flow. It is new, inspiring, crazy, and really at this point a new game. there is no telling what this weigh in on friday will reveal with the new changes but they promise me that the next few weeks it will work itself out. Time will tell and If I find i'm not liking this I can always move on. So i'm excited to say the least.

The month has ended. darn I had things planned and goals to reach. I wanted to lose 3 pounds. I lost one. but that is one less I have to work on for december. I need to stop beating myself up and look at the positives in my days, weeks, and months. Afterall this journey is one positive after another. I really need to get to sleep for a whole night. maybe that will be my new goal for the coming month. Nope, stresses will make sure that doesn't happen. It is 1:30 and i'm up blogging on spark. I will head back to bed in a bit and then sleep till the alarm goes off. I've been doing this for a few nights now. I think it is just worries.

Ok, I have a new plan, a new month, and I need to set my next months goals. Hummmm something to work on.


  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

IUHRYTR 12/1/2010 7:41AM

    A new month for a new attitude and new goals. Wishing you the best of success in reaching yours. emoticon -- Lou

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KNITTABLES 11/30/2010 3:07PM

    A new month, new plans and new goals sounds great to me and I know you can and will do it. Good luck with the WW program.

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JUNEBUG1944 11/30/2010 2:06PM

    You are so close, Michelle! A pound is good...slow, but sure wins the race! You can and will do this! Your success will taste sooooooo sweet!
emoticon emoticon

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MOUNTAINS2CLIMB 11/30/2010 9:46AM

    You can do it Michelle! Congratulations on your one pound - hey, it's progress, be proud! Good luck with the new WW program. I'm sure you will used to the changes in no time.
Hope you got a little more sleep. Hang in there, my friend, you can do this!!

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Learning to understand a few things

Sunday, November 28, 2010

emoticonWhat? Huh? i'm suppose to reach my goals and then move on. No way. I can't. What will I do with myself If I can't diet anylonger?

These a few questions i've asked over the last couple of months or so. I get near goal and wham i'm back up a couple of pounds, I say i'm never going to reach my goal weight and I proceed on. Get back to that spot and gain again....I think I may have this figured out. I was so sure that when I reached my goal I would have nothing left to do. I mean how could I come to this site when I had no dieting techniques to share. But you know what i've been thinking.......really I think I may have this. I can teach someone else. It was so simple all along. Once I reach my weight goal, I still have to maintain and there is someone else next in line that needs me and my journey to help them proceed forward.

I"m up for that. I was working with a friend yesterday, she brought the pharmacist all these pills from over the counter....she wanted something to boost her metabolism. I suggested exercise, nope that won't work for her, she needed something to rev it up, I suggested strength training (muscle burns extra calories), nope that doesn't work for her either. So I told her when she finds that magic pill to let me know because I would like some myself. the pharmacist told her to take a multi vitamin and go from there. Now people....i'm here to tell your there is no, none, nada, zip, zilch magic pill to make all this go away. The same food that got you here, the same emotions that keep you here, they are the ones that are going to get you out of here.

You will have to sweat. ONce or twice at least a week to begin with and I tell ya from experience you will probably go up from there until you become like me and just do it. My husband gives me extra time in the mornings now because he says that by the time I exercise, shower, and eat that takes two hours. He isn't wrong. I do about 40-50 min. of exericise daily and that includes the weekends.

You will also have to watch what you eat. That means you will have to start shopping, cooking at home, weighing and measureing, and even saying no on occasion. I know that doesn't sit well with alot of people but the truth hurts. what got you here again will keep you here if you don't change a few tactics.

And last but not least: emotions. They have a lot to do with a lot of things. If you are an emotional eater, boredom eater (me), or just plain an eater for no other reason but because your neighbor had it and it looked good.....your going to have to come up with a new way of dealing with this. For me it is staying busy, and actually thinking about it. IF I don't plan I fail.

So the next time someone asks how they can lose the weight....tell them to follow in your footsteps for one day and then go from there. this is a lot of hard work. You will sweat, cry, scream, and then one day it will all come together. You will wake up as I have and look in the mirror and the muscles you've always wanted are there. the healthful glow is with you. So im here to push you along, because you will need to be pushed, i'm here to pat you on the back, because every now and again you will need to be patted. I'm just here for you.

I'm off now to finish what I started. I want to reach my ultimate goal. I don't want to be sickly skinny, I don't want you to see my bones to prove i'm thin, I want to be the athletic looking woman in the front row.


  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

IUHRYTR 12/1/2010 7:42AM

    I guess it our nature somewhat to want things to be easy. But if they all were, we wouldn't appreciate the effort it took, would we? One positive day at a time. -- Lou

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MOUNTAINS2CLIMB 11/29/2010 5:47PM

    Michelle, you are putting it all together, and you are right, you will NOT be done when you see your number on the scale. You will still maintain that loss and lifestyle, and yes, there will still be those of us back here that need your support! You already are an inspiration, and once you begin maintenance you will STILL be an inspiration!!

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ITSAWRAP_DIMI 11/29/2010 5:37AM

    You have at least identified those self sabotaging thoughts!!! KUDOS to you! I did not understand my self sabotage until I gained all the weight back. BUT this is a journey and there were things I had to learn. WTG!!!!!

Yes you speak the truth about no miracle pill or plan!!!

Comment edited on: 11/29/2010 5:37:43 AM

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JUNEBUG1944 11/28/2010 8:19PM

    Wanna move in with me and push, prod, and pat? I like that...the athletic looking woman in the front row! That is a great thing to want...I want it too!

BTW...480 more minutes of WALKING? Are you nuts or what? LOL!

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And so a new week begins

Saturday, November 27, 2010

emoticonA new week begins. My ww plan is taking an overhaul come monday. they decided after 13 years it was time to revamp. Hey i'm all for that but come on. So i'm a bit nervous about that and me. I'll be ok but I know the old like the back of my hand. Hey maybe this will work out for me. New is always good on this journey. we can get complacent with the same old same old. I'm up for the challenge and maybe I can reach my goals with this new plan.

I've decided this is a new week and I can make it any thing I want. Today i'm on it, tomorrow may be a different story but i'm all for reaching my goals and seeing the results.

So today the new week begins and i"m on it.


  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MOUNTAINS2CLIMB 11/29/2010 5:43PM

    Maybe the "new" plan will be just what you need to freshen up the journey!! Good luck!! It'll be great and you will MAKE it great!!

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JUNEBUG1944 11/28/2010 3:37PM

    You'll're a woman. And, if you don't like it, you can always WALK away!

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IUHRYTR 11/28/2010 12:19PM

    We can't succeed unless we try. Stay determined and make it one positive day after another. -- Lou

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KNITTABLES 11/27/2010 3:48PM


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    I love the PointsPlus plan!!!! Hope you do too!!!

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ITSAWRAP_DIMI 11/27/2010 8:32AM

    This is a GREAT thing. When I was on WW they changed our plan with new books and everything and since I like new things it was fresh and I was more attentive! I hope the same happens for you. And oh yea I lost a good amt of weight!

I did not read your blog till after I posted on your page. hmmm! OH YEA BABY YOU FINT TO DO THIS!!!!! (yes that is my southern charm coming out)

Comment edited on: 11/27/2010 8:39:18 AM

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CHINAGAL 11/27/2010 7:58AM

    You will rock maintenance!

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BRONXBABE 11/27/2010 7:38AM

    Love your positive attitude!
Here's to us, reaching for our goals! emoticon

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