Wednesday, November 17, 2010
Grrrr, when will the aha moment happen? You know the one where all this healthy lifestyle clicks in place and makes so much sence. I mean does it ever, will I ever get it? I just don't see how. I still struggle the old struggles. My main one is the mindless munching that occurs when I sit down in the evenings. The one that happens after dinner is done, the dishes are washed and the kitchen is suppose to be closed. I sit down to watch a bit of tv and wham, it hits, I"m up, i'm down, i'm up, i'm down. You get the picture. I"m an endless yoyo heading to the pantry. My husband says he is going to put a lock on the pantry door. Hey that may just work. lol
Really though all jokes aside this is the one part of my journey I have yet to overcome. It isn't that I don't have the points (calories) for such moments. I do. But I set a goal for myself and it gets me so frustrated that I have no willpower over the snacks. My days are wonderful, I get up and I exercise each morning without fail. Usually anywhere from 30-50 minutes depending on my morning rush. I get all my waters in, i've got my water bottles in the fridge refilled daily (one holds three the other two) five cups mandatory that I drink , then the other liquids and more water. I get them all. I eat my veggies/fruits religously, so much so that I just do it. I plan, I write it all down, I head to spark, I do the message boards, I journal daily, I blog, I do it all. I just can't get the grip on the mindless munching. I don't know what it is. I"ve listened, i've read, I know it is boredom pure and simple. No i'm not hungry, No i'm not sad, No I don't eat my emotions, i'm the one that gets sick at my stomach when i'm stressed. It is boredom, or habit most likely.
So I have my little stickers, my star, my new calender on the fridge, My hubby is doing my tree (couldn't find anything to use yesterday for that), I have these cool little ornament stickers to use on my tree, the stars for the calendar. I'm ready to begin my holiday transformation. But today it is bare. I want the star to be my goal weight....the biggest one yet.
For those of you wondering what i'm talking about, I give myself gold stars for days that I succeed, that means all parts of the journey not one or two, No success not star, I put those on a calendar so I can see the days of success add up, A team member came up with a tree for the holidays, a success story and decoration at the same time. A few of us on ww are doing this. I found the ornament stickers at the dollar store yesterday and that was an awesome way to show my success. Now to succeed. One of my team members wants a pic of my tree at the end. I hope I can make me proud with at least a few decorations, but really I want the big star at the top. My Goal.
So even though my aha moment may not have happened, i'm living the lifestyle that I choose. I have moments, I have highs, lows, and sometimes I fall down. But I always get back up and dust off my a$# and get back to basics.
Monday, November 15, 2010
Ok, it is time for me to set some goals for myself. Oh i've made many plans, came up with a few good hearted ideas, but it is time to write them down and put them where I can see it. Not only that I need to have a time line. I have the time line because my Team Alabama has a challenge going till Dec. 31. My spark anniversary by the way. I have five pounds to lose and I need to get it going. I know we shouldn't put a time line on our weight loss efforts, really people after almost three years.....I think this one time will be ok. I need to get it done and move on to the next teir of my journey......maintenance.
I bloged each day last week about how I was doing each day. I handled the weekend like a pro. Yes my friends I got the
I'm working today on number five. Never and I say this with meaning, never have I had that many great days in a row. How you may ask did I do it? Shear will power and want power rolled into one. I have the want and now it seems i've found the will. The daily stars are working wonders for my psyche and the heedy power it gives is amazing. One of my ww team members took my idea, and put it to a christmas tree.....I'm borrowing that one also. Wow, what a great idea. So today, my staycation day one, i'm going to get a few small chores done, head to town to the dollar tree and see what I can find for my "weight loss tree".
Now that I have a plan, I need to set my goals to paper, again a trip to the dollar store is in order. I want to post my goals and plan on the fridge so each time i'm in the kitchen I can review and be reminded of where i'm at and where I was. I have to go through some old pics, i'm not looking forward to seeing me like that, but it needs to be done. One of them needs to be at the center of my plan. If I see where I was, I will be reminded of where i'm at.
Ok, today I hope is day five in my quest to get to my goal weight once and hopefulll for all.
Sunday, November 14, 2010
I have had three consecutive good days in a row. count them three. I"m so happy with myself. I got up this morning and started to make my coffee and stopped and just looked at my husband and said "three count them three good days, no cheating, no mindless munching, three" Of course he thinks i've lost my mind. Really though we talked yesterday about all this. He knows my strengths and my weaknesses. For me I've found not having the weaknesses in the house, planning my day out before hand, and sometimes just stopping and listening to the little voice in my head has worked. Now my goal would be to make a week, then two. Because for me one day is good, two in a row is great, but three is awesome. I have never had three and never a good week that went into two. I seem to do good, slack, slack, good, you get the picture. But I can't do that any longer. I need to find the happy place for myself.
I have set up a calender, Thank you Kristi for the idea, and I have given me stars on my good days, Now I can look at a glance and see where i've come and where I need to go. I haven't come up with a reward for this yet, I"m leaning towards a ring I saw, Cathy thank you, and I think it is an awesome idea, then I can look down and see my success, and my hard work at a glance and decide then and there not to go back. I'm close to goal you see and I really need to see this part of my journey over. I have been allowing myself to fail. I think the word is self-sabatage. I don't know if it is the fear of being at goal, the wonder i'm not ready for, or old feelings coming into play. Because i guess I expected different things when I hit goal. I mean yes my body is smaller, but my mind still is bigger. If that makes sense. I'm seeing the results in the mirror but my mind is having trouble seeing that that is me. So I have a few issues i'm still working on.
Now today is my hardest day of the week. I have a plan though, and I hope I can succeed. I have faith I will, but a small part of me still worries. I want that fourth star on my calender. I feel like a kid getting a treat and it feels wonderful.
Friday, November 12, 2010
I finally had a good day. A wonderful team leader gave me the basics list...it was so easy. when I say the basic list I mean that I do ww...she gave it to me short and sweet.....water, exercise, points (my own), and most important write it down. So off I go with my little list. I checked off as I completed a task....water yup 9, exercise yup 30 min. elliptical and a walk with my lunch, points, yup went to bed with one left over, write it down,
It seemed so easy to just focus on the basics and not worry about the other stuff. Now I know some of you are thinking "she knew that" yup I did, but did I follow it? nope. I was trying to do so much at one time I was letting my emotions take over. I was beating myself up and then was so exausted that I wasn't seeing the big picture. I was so worried about the number on the scale that I wasn't seeing me where i'm at today.
I had my weekly weigh in this morning and you guessed it i'm up. 0.2 to be exact. Yup not a lot to some, but to me a big gain. Why you may ask? Well with the other two from the two weeks before it puts me up to a pound total. That is a lot in my book, Way too much for comfort. Because if it was that easy for me to slip and gain for three weeks in a row look how easy it will be for me to keep going and reach my old weight. This is why i'm so thankful to my friend for stepping in and giving me the talking to. My buddy and new best friend did that also. So with the two of them i'm ready to face another day.
Now I will not tell ya i've got it, because really I don't. I just go through the days, try to come up with new ideas for which i'm blank at this moment, and I just take this day by day. that is all I can give you and me right now, a day to day play.
So i'm off to begin my new fresh start to a new fresh week.
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