Monday, October 18, 2010
Today I decided it was time to vamp my exercise routine a bit. My weight loss has been slow and I'm almost to goal. So it was time to change up a few things. My diet is basically great. I cover all the guidelines and I have room on most days for extras. I even have had what I like to call "moments" and the damage isn't as bad as it could be. I"m getting there like i've said before, slow and steady. So today I took on a new exercise training program. I've heard so much about it, i've been running for a while but really I haven't gotten too far, I still prefer to walk it. So today I laced up my tennis shoes and headed out. It shouldn't of been too bad heck it was only walk five minutes, run one minute, walk one and a half minutes, and run one, walk one and one-half for 20 minutes. Ok, off I go, omg, by the end of twenty minutes my one minute runs where like crawls, but I did it. I finished it. I was so proud of me I felt like rocky for a minute.
So as I head off to my doctors appointment, my six month cancer recheck, i'm going after a great exercise session and I can't wait to tell my doctor. He was so on to me for being over weight to begin with and now today i'm officially 20 lbs lighter and now i'm heading off in a new direction. I hope in the spring to run my first 5k. This has been a dream for a while and I hope to see it through.
No matter what today brings remember you have all the tommorrows to get it right.
Thursday, October 14, 2010
What? Is that me in that mirror. It can't be i'm a size 14 and so unhappy with myself. When did the change occur? I must of fell asleep and woke like rip van winkle. I mean I still feel like the same ole fat women with no neck and two chins. But as I get myself up each morning and put on a pair of size six pants to head off to work I have to stll shake my head in wonder.
I"ve been struggling with this. I've been at a point in my journey where i'm wondering why do I bother. I exercise religously, I eat all that I can in the fruit and veggie department and I drink water until i'm litterally sloshing when I walk. but the scales don't move a lot of the time now, I have moments where I so want to just lay down my gaurd and eat till I can't move. I want to have that donut and cake, and chips....you get the picture. but then I can't. I just don't have the want anylonger, I do on occasion spin out of control, who doesn't. Those that say they don't just are kidding themselves. And to the few that don't well good for you but in my real world the temptations are great sometimes. Saying i'm not going to eat that is like hanging a red flag in front of a bull....suddenly what didnt' seem to important is now all consuming.
Oh I eat the occasional treat. I do not temp fate. I keep mostly good in the house because I know myself. I'm also learning that the longer i'm on this lifestyle change I don't like sitting around the house anylonger on my days off. I want to get out and do. Who is this new person? I'm still trying to figure that one out.
Yup, seeing is not always believing. I see but i'm still working through this part of the change. No one said it would be easy, and I guess I never thought about me at this point. I always started but never got this far before. New territory? you bet. but each new day i'm learning about me. I may not see movement on the scales like a lot of folks, but I see the change each time I walk by a mirror. I've even taken to checking it as I prepare for my day......I even tuck in my shirts now and guess what? I like what I'm seeing.
So take a moment to stop and look. You may be amazed at what is happening right before your eyes.
Saturday, October 09, 2010
Im still here. Still pluggling along. I have had a very busy work week and that has kept me from blogging like I should. I had my weigh in this morning. i"m 0.2. A blip on the screen but a loss just the same. So I will take it with a smile and move on to next weeks.
I'm struggling some days, and gliding through others. I guess this is all a part of the journey but I can honestly say at this point in the game I thought I would of had it beat. Wrong!!! I'm still learning about this lifestyle as I go. I'm still learning about me and what I need and don't need as the case may be. Oh I want to reach for the quick, the easy, the goohey, the sweet, the salty, and on some occasions I do. Oh the guilt follows me on those moments. I think others before me have done this why can't I? meaning they have lost the weight with such ease and i'm struggling daily. I"m not hungry when I grab for the junk, i'm really not sure at the moment what I am. I ;ve tried to study it all out, but sometimes as the stuff is going in it is hard to decide which it is, the taste, the texture, or am I really just tired or thirsty? I'm not going to pretend each day isn't a struggle with some kind of outside interferance. I mean I work where most all but one other are eating to eat, we talk about food all day long. New recipies and such. My husband isn't following any kind of rules with his "new lifestyle" as he likes to call it as he is having that bowl of icecream each night, I have it in my mind that I need to have the munching food at all times. meaning it must be in the cupboard just in case.
I work on myself daily. I haven't given up on me. I'm close to reaching my goal but have I learned anything yet? i'm still learning each day, I'm trying new foods, new recipes, new exercise. I'm telling myself i'm doing what has to be done, I look darn good in my size six jeans, if I say so myself. But who am I kidding? MYSELF that is who. I haven't won this battle. I'm holding off the other side but they are closing in on me. I want to reach goal yeah, but I want to stay there when I get there. I don't want to just taste the freedom, I want to live it.
We are all here struggling with the same things. It is nice to know that i'm not alone. I read all that I can get my hands on about change, ideas, and such. I read blogs from others with the same struggles. I know we can do this together. I thank you all for your support and my dear friend who hears this way more then anybody should. She listens and then gives me advice and a kick when I need it....thank you kristi. You have become a big part of my picture. We are standing in the mirror and we see the beauty that we are.
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