Thursday, May 06, 2010
I have to tell ya i'm so glad to be getting back to work today. I need routine. Now don't get me wrong this week I have worked on me, taken care of me, and used my new word FOCUS alot. I have learned a bit about the new me I want to become. Number one is that I like exercise, number two I like to eat healthy, and number three if i set a plan in motion it usually is successful. One thing i've learned on this site is "if you fail to plan, you plan to fail". That quote is so true. I find for me I have to plan. I mean really plan out my day. I don't handle boredom very well and I have the tendency to get lazy.
Well this last week I didn't get lazy. I got in my daily walks in the evening and I have found I actually enjoy this so i'm going to continue this now that i'm back at work. I walk at lunch during work time, but I really enjoy the evening walks and my dogs seem to look forward to it also. I think that one i'll keep. Heck I can always use a bit more exercise. Who couldn't.
I planned my meals and weighed and measured without fail. I learned alot about portion size this week. I didn't snack all day, I set aside times for that, there were even days I found it was lunch before I really wanted anything and then the snack moment was gone. Not that I went under calories by anymeans. I got in my veggies, fruits, and water without a problem. I'm having trouble with protein as meat just isn't important to me. I have added an egg somedays at breakfast, and in the evening I try to have some form of protien. Funny but as my lifestyle has changed so has the foods I crave or want.
I'm getting my sleep again. For a couple days that was off, don't really know why but I started back to bed at a normal time and got up about the time I usually do for work and I finally slept through without trouble. Sorry guys I need my rest.
So today i'm all about routine. I'm ready to head to work and get the day accomplished. I have plans to hop on my elliptical this morning, get in some strength, and my walk at lunch. today I won't get home till after nine tonight so no walk this evening for me. But I will get in as much as I can at lunch.
I will focus, I will succeed. I won't have it any other way.
Monday, May 03, 2010
I did it. I made a choice and a commitment to me and I did it. I didn't graze at all, I met all my challenges head on, I only had one snack and it was planned and on a plate and eaten at the table. No eating out of a bag, no chips, no grazing, no munching.
Now I have to be honest with you all and tell you it was no easy feat....old habits die hard, but I took each moment for what it was and didn't look too far ahead. I find that when watching tv, reading my book or sitting still I wanted to munch. So I got up and moved. I cleaned, I bathed the dogs, I chewed a couple of sticks of gum. I survived. I have to admitt getting up this morning, having a bit of trouble sleeping straight through for some reason, I was so proud of me and ready for today. Today will bring new challenges, new tricks, and new plans. I'm ok with that. I also found that when I woke I wasn't bloated. My belly was down, and I wasn't hungry. Imagine that, not hungry, starved, or hung over from food.
I prepped my foods, snacks, weighed and measured (which I may add I was slacking on) and I used the spark food tracker. Now I do ww and that is on a point system but I wanted to see how close the ww points were to the calorie count....lets just say right on the money for the most part. I find it is easier for me to write as I go then to sit down and enter each food in the computer.
I got in a short walk, rain made that not any longer. I got a lot accomplished in my day. I feel empowered today to head into this next step. This journey is one step at a time and I was running I feel and I tripped so many times. So i'm slowing it down a bit and walking to my goal. I can not beat myself up about mistakes, I can not give in, and I will not fail. So im off to begin this day. Hopefully I will have the same success as yesterday because this feeling of empowerment is awesome and the euphoria is just unexplainable.
There really is no time like the present.
Sunday, May 02, 2010
I had my weigh in this morning and lets suffice it to say it was not pretty. I feel like crying, kicking, yelling. You know the picture. Well I'm not. I mean I should, but that is self pitty and that is not me. So lets just say if I plan on reaching my goals for the month of may I better get to it.
I have reset my trackers, goal's, and such on spark. I'm ready to take this head on. I can look back on my journal and know where my problems lie so it is up to me to fix it. I wish one of you could wave the magic wand but that isn't going to happen so I need to get going. I want to thank all for the encouragement through out my journey. You have all given me such good ideas and visons, it is just that I haven't held me accountable. Well today I have no choice. the proof is on the scale.
Yeah I know it could be that i'm on vacation and not really working out like I do when on work days, and yest it could be that i'm bored and eating myself crazy, and it could be that darn bag of chips I choose to bring in the house. It could be all of that. Wait it is all of that. So I am aiming for a loss this week. It is easy for me to sit here and type that but it won't be easy to do it. I have to be honest i'm great sun thru wednesday, then for some unknown reason I struggle the rest of the week. Enough....one day should be no different from the rest. I need to do this for my own sanity. I hate being unhealthy. yeah i've come a long ways from that close to 200 pound woman who is only 5'1" and looked like humbty dumpty.
Yeah i've gotten down to a size 6 (woohoo), yeah I work out daily, yeah I eat better, yeah I'm starting to like what I see when I look in the mirror...but I hate the setbacks. Yeah I know everyone has them. but this one has been going on now most of the winter. ENOUGH. I want change, and that change has to come from me....................so i'm changeing me.
They say you have to want it.....OH I want it alright. I want it all, the brass ring, the WOW factor. Yep I want it all. So I"m here to say i'm going to go for it. If it means sweating a bit more, then i'm there, IF it means more water i'm on it, less chips or snacks on the grocery list,,,I can do that. I have to do this for me. Because right now people stepping on the scales and seeing the same ole weight week in and week out is getting old. I want to see changes.....So i'm off now to begin on the me I want to be.
I'm going to get there, it is just going to take me a few more steps and a few more days at a time.
Saturday, May 01, 2010
I want to post a goal or two for this month. I do this on my spark page but maybe if I put it out there for all I will be more apt to stick with it.
Goal #1: lose three pounds this month CW: 141.8
Goal#2: Work off at least a inch off my body
That is it for this month. Not too tough, but right now with the weight i'm having a bit of trouble. I lose, I gain, I lose. It is a vicious cycle and it needs to end now. So I'm posting and hoping this ends here and now. I want to hop on the scales with confidence each week, not trepidation and what they may or maynot read. I find I get nervous, can't sleep, and worry about the outlook on the scales. That is so sad.
I see my spark friends posting losses and I envy them their dedication and then I think I just don't have to strength of them. But that isn't true. I have the strength, dedication, and stamina. I prove that to myself everyday I head out for my walk. It is the food i'm having trouble with. I do great in the daytime if i'm working, I'm even handling evenings better on those days. It is weekends and days off that i'm having a bit of trouble with. I do great it seems till after lunch. Then I get the snack attack. I have to really work it through. This weeks success step for ww is doing just that. So here is my chance to make changes I can live with.
I have the evening snack thing down now. OR at least I think I do. I have to actually think about it and stop myself sometimes. So again a work in progress.
I'm going to succeed this week and next. And should I not, there is the next. This is no easy feat, no magic pill, wand, or word to get me to my goals. It is going to take me and only me with the help of my friends and spark that is, to get to my goal.
So i'm off to begin. After all each journey begins with one step.
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