Thursday, November 12, 2009
ok i'm back from vacation, which i may add was wonderful. i drove myself to clearwater, all alone. it was wonderful. first trip i have ever done on my own. another first for my improvements. i'm not afraid of going it alone. that statement is about my walk with health, and my walk in this world.
i have not been so good about the weight issues this past few days. in fact i feel huge. i haven't gotten on the scales yet. i'm a bit worried about that. weigh in is friday for me and i must say i'm not looking forward to it. i stayed the same last week, yet again, this week i see a gain in my future. but i'm ok with this. i'm ready, more than ready, to get back to basics and get on track. i have a goal to reach and i'm not getting there from here. i did learn while talking to my mom this last few days i'm not eating enough. i have been doing ww and i was so worried about the points that i stayed low. not good. i have been eating about five points less then i should be. that is about 250 calories in english and that is why the scales were going nowhere.
well now i'm ready. i hit the grocery store on my way home yesterday, i have fruit, veggies, and lean meats. i'm ready. so i will post as i go as that is another area i have been slacking in. i have to hold me accountable to me. and i haven't been doing that. i say i want to get there but i have to be willing to do what is needed to get there from here. so enough of this crap, i'm ready.
i did get in my exercise on my vacation. that was a plus. i needed it with all the crap i ate. i made bad choices and i will have to hold me accountable to me for that. so when i get up and get on the scales tomorrow i will just have to take a deep breath, and then step on and not cry, yell, jump up and down. i did this to me. and i have to fix me. so hopefully the next time i blog i will have good news about my journey.
till next time. keep sparking and don't give up the faith. in yourself that is, we all need to trust ourselves more.god first, us second. michelle.
Wednesday, November 04, 2009
well here i sit wondering is this really worth all the hoopla? i have been good, i get in my exercise minutes, i strength train and i get on those scale and either it sits still, or i lose maybe a half pound. what gives? i know the answers to these questions i will recieve....yes it is worth it, yes don't give in. i know the true outcome is determined by me. i have to give it my all and then some. i watch the biggest loser and i often wonder how they succeed. i know with help. we don't always have the help we need. i have support at home, but i get bored. no, i don't leave my exercise the same, i change up, no i don't eat the same foods, i like to try new things and i love veggies, ground turkey, and most healthy foods. snacking is really only when i'm bored and not everyday. so what gives? have i hit my plateau again....i mean darn this is a pain. i pray on it, i study, i write down my foods, i never give in or up. then i have the moment, you know the one, where your sitting there and you wonder if all this is worth the work. do i eat the donut if i want, do i have chocolate if i need it?
i plan, i shop with a list, i do all i can. i'm not ready to throw in the towel but i could use some input here. am i the only one who feels this way? i know i can't be but sometimes it feels it. i have gotten this far but sometimes i wonder will i have the stamina it takes to get to the finish line. as of right now i would have to say no, but in a minute i will change my mind.
well i will go for now. i have to finish getting ready for work. the world doesn't stop because i'm having a bad day. so to all i say good luck on your journeys whatever they may be. may we meet at the finish lines.
Sunday, November 01, 2009
well it has been a bit since i bloged last. life has been so busy it seems. maybe busy isn't the word just full. my loss this week was a half pound. i thought it would be more but alas i was wrong again.
church is going. i went to my bible study and actually had a good time. i have to work today so i will miss church. but there is next time.
i'm leaving for vacation in a couple of days, i can't wait. going to florida to see me parents for a few days.
halloween came and went with not much damage to the waist or psyche. went to a haunted firehouse and we had a blast, screamed, got scared, you know the drill.
i guess that is it for now. have a great day. keep sparking guys.
Tuesday, October 27, 2009
sunday was a day i'm still praying on. i need some input. ok here i go.....my pastor pulled me and another lady in her office and told us (now i'm the secretary and treasurer) that we would have help counting the monies from the church service. now alone i would n't of thought nothing of this, but she then adds in that we have been talking to each other and she feels we should only come to her if we have problems. she doesn't want us to talk to anyone else, only her. so the gentlman she sent to watch over us in reality is babysitting us. i stood up and stepped down from my posts. my belief as i told her is i'm not gossiping, talking about other members or such, if someone is my friend i feel i should be able to talk with them if they would like. i didn't approach her, my friend, and we have a bit in common so i can see where she is coming from. now mind you this isn't church business. now if it was i could understand but this is personal. and when i suggested that maybe she didn't feel comfortable going to the pastor the pastor this said i wasn't submitting to the lord. now last i knew the lord gave me free will, a heart, sould and a mind. i don't feel that my pastor has a right to tell me whom i can associtate with and whom i can't. she is always saying how she is how i'm going to get to heaven, not just me but you see what i'm saying. i say i'm my way to heaven through jesus. yes she can lead in my teachings but how i get to heaven is up to me. i feel like this and i may be wrong here, but the lord knows my heart, even jesus has the apostles to help him along the way. if i can't reach out a hand to a friend then why am i here. i want to go to heaven when i leave this place but in the meantime the lord has given me a wonderful life to enjoy while i wait. i don't think he intented for us to just sit and wait on him. i was born agian in the water, washed in the blood of jesus christ. i didn't know i was heading into a communist church and i need some input. i'm i being disobediant to the lord. she is always on us about tythes also. if we don't give 10% every week, she checks and brings it up in church. is this right? i give what i can and i hope the lord is happy with that. i do give 10%, but it includes my time, my prayers, not to meantion church supplies, and donations of which we always do someting. please help me with this. my husband says he is behind me but i don't want to make a mistake and leave my chuch for the wrong reasons if i'm just being disobediant. she says if i can't submit then how can i call myself a christian. help please. mcihelle.
Friday, October 23, 2009
drum roll please.......i stayed the same. sorry guys. i'm actually happy with this. this was my dreaded time of the month. i usually gain so i'll take this. it gives my a place to go down from next week. i had two good weeks of loss and i needed to have this i guess. my body knows best. i do believe it will take me longer to get where i really want to be but that is ok also. slow and steady wins the race. i want to wish all luck with thier weigh ins this week. we can do anything we put our minds to.
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