Wednesday, October 07, 2009
as i sit here reflecting on how far i have come and yet how far i have to go, i know that with a bit of determination on my part i can beat this thing. this weight wasn't put on this body over night and believe me when i say it is not coming off over night. it has taken a lot of exercise, which includes much sweat, tears, cramps and many moments of triumph. the first time i made a half mile run i thought the gods were surely smiling down on me. as i was able to turn from a donut during a meeting or sweets i really didn't need. better yet today i stuck to my grocery plan and list. that is a first. yup i write the lists, nope i don't always follow them.
today is the first step in reflecting back and i need to do that much more than i do. sometimes i get down on myself and my losses or gains as the case may be. i have to remember that along the way i have had ups, downs, and sometimes standstills. but when i remember the feeling of losing two pounds one week, or fitting into a size 6 jeans, i know that i can do this to the finish. i just have to get back that feeling of triumph and determination that i once had not so long ago.
i often wonder if after so long on the new lifestyle we don't get bored. i'm not really, i guess i just wish i could down that bag of chips on a bad day and then move on to more good days. which if i stop to reflect on that also, i do. i don't eat bad all the time just on occasions. mostly out of boredom, while reading, and so on. what i need to to change a habit and place something different in my hands while i read. keep moving when i'm bored.
so i'm off now to get ready for bed. i have to get in my sleep before another day of work. and i really need to get myself on the right track. reflecting back has let me see that i have come so far and not all of this journey has been a struggle. the new pieces of me that i have come to accept are really awesome. and i will get there from here. with the help of my prayers and steady routine i feel i can overcome most all obsticles in my way. god bless my spark friends for without your encouragement and well wishes i don't think many of us would of come this far.