MALEXANDER4   167,188
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Change has to come from YOU

Saturday, April 06, 2013


Biggest Loser


“You need to WANT to change. You need to be willing to do the work.” – Jillian


Is this not so very true of some of our journies? I know it explains a bit about mine.

Change is now, the change is within each of us. So lets get moving in the direction we want to be.

I'm giving it all i've got.

So far i've had a great week. Good enough to see a loss I can't say but really good enough to step on those darn scales with my fingers crossed....wait I don't need to do that do I? Nope im just hoping on in the morning and letting the new week begin.

Michelle.






  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

WALLAHALLA 4/8/2013 11:38AM

    great quotes emoticon

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WALLAHALLA 4/8/2013 11:38AM

    great quotes emoticon

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SWIMLOVER 4/7/2013 1:14PM

  emoticon Blog!

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KENDRACARROLL 4/6/2013 10:42PM

    Hope you'll have a great weigh-in tomorrow.
emoticon emoticon

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ARW715 4/6/2013 10:25PM

    I am always inspired when I read your posts. Glad you have had a great week so far!

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MYUTMOST4HIM 4/6/2013 8:48PM

    emoticon

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Happy Easter

Sunday, March 31, 2013

I would like to just take a moment and wish each of you a very Happy Easter. Spark has become my lifeline in which I can grab hold when i'm falling and each of you has become so very dear to me. Thank you for all that you do without even knowing your doing it.

Spring is in the air and it is time to renew a few things around here. So im off to do just that.....

Happy Easter!!

Michelle. emoticon

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

FISHINGLADY66 4/1/2013 5:24PM

    Late here, but I do hope you had a Blessed Easter.

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WALLAHALLA 4/1/2013 3:15PM

    Hopefully Spring has sprung for keeps!

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GAILRUU 3/31/2013 6:19PM

    I hope your Easter was a joyful one.

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ARW715 3/31/2013 1:10PM

    Happy Easter!

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KENDRACARROLL 3/31/2013 12:56PM

    Happy Easter!
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KENTUCKYWOMAN 3/31/2013 8:32AM

    Happy Easter my friend.

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RIDLEYRIDER 3/31/2013 8:10AM

  And the same to you! emoticon

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It has to start with ME

Saturday, March 30, 2013

I had a slight loss this week of 0.4. So i'm moving in the right direction. Upset? Nope I worked out more so i'm thinking some of that is toning. I know my pants fit a bit better this week not so much belly bloat. If you know what I mean. I seem to put it on there first and take if off of there first.

In order for myself to continue this journey i've had to do just this. So many times over the last year or so i've wanted to just throw in the towel and give up. I mean come on now, no matter how hard it seemed I was going I was not moving at all. I mean the scales have been fighting me all along the way. So I had to get my mind right and then just take it slow and steady. Nope i'm not giving up life to lose a few pounds. I'm going to enjoy all that is given and enjoy life to its fullest. I have read so much where people give up all their favorites. I"m not going to stop living to lose this weight. When I joined spark that was what it was about. Learning to eat right and still have a good time. Food doesn't make up who me are but it has become a focus in must of lives. When we eat, what we eat, how we eat, it just goes on and on. So this week I entered my foods in spark, will be honest I usually count points for WW and don't do this. But I tood a little break from Weightwatchers and sparked like I used to. You know what???? It was easy, kinda fun to see what I ate and how it added up. I made better choices, earned a few more points, and not only that I lost a half pound. So does spark work???? Well I have to give it a thumbs up.

So today i'm heading into a new week. I can't or won't predict what the end result will be next saturday but I can promise you I will do my darndest to see it through.

One pound at a time.
Michelle.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MOUNTAINS2CLIMB 4/1/2013 7:09PM

    Great job Michelle !

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LAINYC 3/30/2013 2:57PM

    emoticon

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ARW715 3/30/2013 1:42PM

    Amen sister!

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FISHINGLADY66 3/30/2013 11:47AM

    emoticon blog. Stay on track. emoticon

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SHERYLDS 3/30/2013 9:38AM

    emoticon go for it

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MBEHNKEN 3/30/2013 9:01AM

    Excellent post! Thank you.

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MJRVIC2000 3/30/2013 9:00AM

    Exercise, eat right, make life style changes, rest and sleep! That's the key to weight loss and healthy life. God Bless YOU! Vic.

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Time to change

Sunday, March 24, 2013

We are all here for the same thing CHANGE. I personally have overcome a lot in my life and i'm stronger for it. But while I would love to think that overcoming weight issues would be again easy i'm so very off the mark. All the turmoil in my life was nothing compared to ;this.

I put a few of my much hidden secrets out there on a message board and guess what? Nobody disowned me. Yup i'm a statistic. I've been molested as a child, abused by way of "punishment", married a alcoholic, had a child at the tender age of 19 and yup divorced by the time my second child was a little over two, single mom, remarriage, you get the pic. I'm a statistic from way back. Now i'm here trying to lose this baggage I call a sheild. Because lets be honest that is what it is. If you dig deep enough in your own background you will find what is troubling you.

I reached my goal and then I gained it all back. Why you may wonder, because I think the answer lies in people started to notice me and I was standing out. I had tried for so long to be in the background that when I was finally in the forefront OMG. Not a good feeling because they would notice that I wasn't perfect. I was a statistic. But guess what? So what. I am who I am because of being that statistic. So now I want to be the me I have always wanted to be. The outgoing me, the me that doesn't have to be ashamed anymore. I am who I am and for whatever reasons my path was already set. So now it is time to finish this. No more sitting on the side lines wanting and wishing for what I fear I will never have. I have me and that is all I need at this time. MYSElF and with the help of a few wonderful FRIENDS i'm going to be a success not only in my weightloss but also in my future.

So Im not done with my journey by a long shot. I may come and blog about the sorrow, the anger, the troubles along the way but I will do it for me. To clear my head and know that this is a new day full of such promise. I will try to learn to go to bed happy that I made the choises I did and there is no sense in getting upset with the ones I chose wrong. I had choices and they were my choices. Not someone elses.

Michelle. emoticon

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

TERESA6262 3/26/2013 8:10AM

    As always, your blogs say a LOT! You CAN and you WILL make it happen.
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WALLAHALLA 3/24/2013 11:15PM

    Never give up, cause you are worth every good thing this world has to offer, and so much more.

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FISHINGLADY66 3/24/2013 9:23PM

    Great Blog Michelle. As we always say "Take it One Day at a Time". You are a much stronger person than you give yourself credit for. You can change your thinking and you do have a Choice and Chance to Change. You are loved by your Spark Friends. I hope I am on your friends list also. God Bless you. ((Hugs)). Irene

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SLIMPAM23 3/24/2013 4:33PM

    You are such a brave person. And I know it must be scary to have people "notice" you when you have spent so much time and effort to blend into the background. I am proud of you for continuing to strive to do better. And I I know that you are proud of yourself for refusing to give up or give in. You are an inspiration to others - even if you don't want to be!!!! We can't help but want keep trying like you keep trying. And we can't help but keep cheering for you as well!!
You are awesome my cyber friend---don't EVER forget that!
Pam

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SHERYLDS 3/24/2013 10:41AM

    emoticon I hope to be on the FRIENDS list emoticon

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EVIE4NOW 3/24/2013 9:09AM

  You are who you are. Hold your head up high because guess what? Nobody is perfect and nobody has the right to judge anyone. The past is the past and can't be undone or relived. Can only live in the present and plan for the future. emoticon

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KENTUCKYWOMAN 3/24/2013 9:02AM

    emoticon emoticon I am so very, very proud of you. Moving FORWARD from this day on.
Hugs,
Joan

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Oh my

Friday, March 22, 2013

Oh my is right. Wow I sure don't want to see what those pesky scales have to say this week. I"ve stayed pretty much the same for two weeks and now this week I see a break through but believe me it isn't in the way I would like to see them move... emoticon nope more like emoticon Yup poor poor me.

ok I think I know who I want to be....the best me I can be. But I don't seem to be proving that to myself or anyone right now. I have fallen and can't seem to get back up. I mean it isn't like it is a day off or a weekend of not planning. Nope this is like two years of " I will do this" and then more " darn i'm failing myself yet again".

I've often thought about giving up and just walking away and trying to just be happy with who I am at this moment. The problem with that is that in reality I hate the person I am right this moment. I'm ashamed that I have gained all the weight I lost back, i'm tired to the point of why bother it isn't going to change anything. I do what I should for a week, sometimes two and then I step on the scales and nothing. Nada, zip, zilch. Either i'm the same or im up yet again. I mean since January i've been "back on track"...I'm exactly one pound less today than I was on January 1st. Now that isnt because I worked at it. Nope that is because I didn't believe enough in myself to even hardly begin. I went on vacation a couple of weeks ago and had to "borrow" a few things from my mom so I had something to wear...I was at her house in Florida and what I packed didn't fit. Meaning that anything I had of packed wouldn't of fit. that is the place i'm at. My weekend wear is sweats, my work wear is clothes that fit but they are navy blue and Khaki, the colors of Walmart. So you see there I have to shop for what will fit as I have to have something to wear to the Pharmacy each day...they frown on nudity.....but I digress. It isn't funny. It is sad. I"m sad, mad, upset, ashamed, and mostly envious of all that have or are succeeding at this point. Why? When i'm the reason for the setbacks should I be jealous of anyone? Because I was there. I was the one with the "I lost again this week" posts. I was the one that ate what was good for me and I even found a few things I really liked that I would of never eaten before. I have exercised and I love that part. Probably a good thing or I would way over what I am right now. So as I close tonight, i'm still trying find my way. I won't end this blog because to be honest it doesn't end here. This is the beginning. I have so much baggage inside me right now that I feel like I need to blog it out one day at a time. I may not find a miracle but maybe after i've put it out there I will find a way to heal.

I so want to be the me I know I can be. I'm strong, i'm capable, i'm a doer, and it is time to start doing something that will do me good instead of the things that I have done to myself to hurt me.

Michelle. emoticon

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

EVERGREEN0587 3/23/2013 8:58PM

    "A river cuts through rock, not because of its power, but because of its persistence."

I agree with UMBILICAL, Don't let the scale own you. It's just a number it can't dictate who you are or who your going to be.

Let go of all those things that upset you, forget them, there in the past and no longer matter. Tomorrow is a new day. Tomorrow the sun will rise and life will go on.

You are STRONG! You CAN do this! Dig deep inside yourself and refuse to waver!

emoticon Cristina


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MIDROAD 3/23/2013 11:22AM

    emoticon

Comment edited on: 3/24/2013 12:27:29 PM

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SUGARSMOM2 3/23/2013 9:58AM

  sure its hard but anything worth doing is not easy . if it where easy it would not be the goal you want in your life . do not give up . YOu are worth so much . keep your chin up and stand the ground . it will be worth it in the end . be strong .

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KENTUCKYWOMAN 3/23/2013 3:46AM

    Michelle, I like what Fishlady66 had to say. Come back each day and read what you have written. I so know how you feel because I'm right there with you. But...I cannot afford to give up on myself, and neither can you. I want to tell you emoticon but unless we emoticon and pushing ourselves, then no we won't do it. There is a lot of people here for you and I know you know I top that list.
Hugs,
Joan

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WALLAHALLA 3/23/2013 12:31AM

    Hang in there...you CAN do this!

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FISHINGLADY66 3/22/2013 10:50PM

    Come back and read you blog every day and stay committed. emoticon Don't ever just give up. Take it One Day at a Time. emoticon emoticon emoticon

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AM217PERRY 3/22/2013 10:25PM

    Resin your focus one day at a time. emoticon

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UMBILICAL 3/22/2013 10:03PM

  Don't let the scales own you.

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TERESA6262 3/22/2013 10:00PM

    emoticon
You'll get there, Michelle!

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MYBULLDOGS 3/22/2013 9:59PM

    emoticon


i have not gained a pound in over a year.

i gave up sugar and grain products and lost 44 pounds at age 61.

my sister lost 105 pounds at age 63 by walking 15000 steps a day and has not gained a pound back either in over a year

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