Saturday, September 06, 2014
Determination is what takes people far! Stick to it — the results will be worth it!
"happiness radiates from within"
You need to deal with a situation that requires little more than an open mind. Fortunately, you can deploy that with aplomb today -- though it may require a little adjustment in your preconceptions.
I'm posting each of these items because yesterday I had a melt down. It was my weigh in day again, I had been tracking all week, moving like I'm suppose to, you know the drill, so I step on them and to my dismay they were up two pounds. Again!!!!!!!!! Needless to say if I wasn't afraid of my husband running in to see me standing on the scales, naked, crying I had better just leave them alone and move away slowly. I was so upset.
Now you may say oh it is water, it is muscle, it is what it is. But I really am tired of hearing all that. Why? Because this has been going on now for quite some time. When they say you lose and then regain weight and with it comes friends the statistics aren't lying. I've gained all of my weight back plus and the plus is what makes this all so bad. But not only that but the work I'm doing isn't doing anything.
Ok so anyhow, I had a breakdown of sorts. I got on my knees and I prayed, begged, yelled, and just vented to the universe or anyone that would listen. I just can't understand what is wrong with me. But today I awake and signs are coming at me faster than I can think. What does all this mean to my journey or for my journey?
Where do I go from here? How do I continue on the path I'm on with a sinking feeling that this next week will be the same as the week before, or the week before that?
Because I just know in the back of my mind if I quit that will be it. So I have to have faith that I'm where I'm suppose to be at this moment. I don't have to like it I just have to keep moving forward one step at a time and never give up on me.
All this is not to say I won't have a bad day, week, month....by with all that I have inside of me that wants this I will succeed. If not today than one day soon.
Friday, August 29, 2014
So long as you have courage and a sense of humor,
it is never too late to start life afresh.
- Freeman Dyson
If you have made mistakes, there is always another chance for you.
You may have a fresh start any moment you choose,
for this thing we call 'failure' is not the falling down,
but the staying down.
- Mary Pickford
Well another month comes to an end. I end on a gain for the total month. Not much but enough where I almost want to throw in the towel. I'm exercising more and finally getting back to the YMCA and walking more. My eating according to my journal is spot on, but as I stepped up to those scales this morning just knowing I had a great week on them, they again failed me. So as I almost cried and I know I said "what, that can't be" I was so ready at that moment to literally throw those 129.00 aria scales out the window. But I took a deep breath, which is hard when you don't want to cry. And I began my list of what I did right this week and this month.
1. I'm moving so much more again
2. I'm getting my water in each and everyday.
3. I'm eating my freggies.
4. I'm shopping and eating so much better.
5. My pants are just a bit looser.
So maybe just because the scales say I'm up doesn't mean I'm up totally. Actually I ended the month just over where I began so I guess I got this maintenance down. Though I'm not even close to that.
I'm not giving up this easily. I'm in control of my future and it starts NOW.
Saturday, August 16, 2014
I ranted yesterday about the feelings I'm having about my weight issues or lack there of. But I'm not giving up on myself. I'm just in a slump right now, ok it has been going on for a while, but I'm good. I'm doing the right thing and yes it isn't showing like I would so love but I'm not quitting. One thing I'm not is a quitter. A whiner maybe, but during the rant I'm still pushing myself forward because in the back of my mind is the what if's ....what if I quit and gain even more, what if I never reach my goal, what if someone sees me and thinks dang she has gotten big. So many what if's.....
I'm so really trying to not let this happen.
Paper journal at the ready, app tuned in, and good healthy foods bought, I'm ready for another good week and who knows maybe this week will be different.
I want to say I miss the Spark journal they used to have. I journaled everything so often and now it is gone. So the only place I have to rant, or jump for my own joy is in a blog, Did Spark not realize somethings we have to work out on our own.
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