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Did I Look Like That???

Tuesday, July 22, 2014

I'm watching Brandy's episode on EWL from last Tuesday right now. Just saw her initial weigh-in. When I saw her with just a sports bra on and her enormous stomach, I thought to myself, "She must weight close to 400 lbs." But the scale said 329 lbs. My starting weight was 328 lbs. I never thought I was that fat, but then I see pictures like this and I know I was.

I have my "fat" picture on the fridge for motivation, but it's been there so long I hardly notice it anymore.

I need to take a long, hard look at these pictures today. I need to remember where I was and how I lived for so many years, limited in so many aspects of my life by my obesity. I need to REMEMBER! Because I know how easy it would be to weigh 328 lbs. again.

A month ago I joined Brooke Birmingham's Diet Bet. Not sure how I first found out about Brooke, but when I saw her starting weight was 327 lbs. (very near my own 328), I felt an immediate kinship with her, even though she is in her 20's and I am 63. I have been following her journey on her blog,
with great joy as she hit her goal and became what she dreamed of for so long: A Weight Watcher Lecturer. She is certainly an inspiration, and when she started a Diet Bet last month, I thought, "Why not?" For some reason betting that $20 got me motivated again, and I reversed my gaining trends. I started slowly last month, by cutting out the snack/binging and that small change helped a lot, I did lose 4% (7.3 lbs.), so I will get my $20 back. Then I saw Chris & Heidi Powell started a Diet Bet which started the day after Brooke's ended. I decided to join another one, and risked $30 this time.

I feel like I'm back at the beginning, when I started out slowly, first just giving up my Pepsi. Then eating just one portion of the regular food I continued to cook, but eventually finding healthier foods and recipes to cook and eat. I'm working my way back into this slowly, and I feel confident I will be able to lose another 7 pounds before August 22. After losing almost 180 lbs., 7 pounds seems like nothing. It's not nothing, it's now almost 1/3 of the way to my goal, which is to get back to 150 lbs.

Today at lunch, we stopped at a local bar & grill after Du's bone scan. The special was a Philly sandwich, served with potato chips. POTATO CHIPS! My nemesis. They are probably the food I miss the most. And I have not allowed myself to eat them for almost five years. I know I can't limit the quantity, so I always figure it's just easier not to eat any. So I ordered my "sandwich," I asked the waitress to hold the bread and the cheese, so my 'sandwich' was simply grilled chicken, onions and green peppers. Then I asked to substitute a side salad with lite Italian dressing for the chips. I feel really good about the choices I made today, and how I was brave enough to ask for what I wanted. The waitress was really nice and the meal came out exactly as I had ordered it. I'm BACK!!!

I will look like this again.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

KERRYG155 7/22/2014 7:59PM

    Sounds like a good lunch. I do know how easy it is to ignore those pictures when they've been hanging a while. I've done the same thing. I actually have an after picture on my fridge and never actually "see" it. Maybe we should move them every so often?

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LIVE_AMAZINGLY 7/22/2014 7:58PM

    My nemesis would be a sweet dessert. That's my undoing...

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HOLLYM48 7/22/2014 6:07PM

    Good for you! You can do it!

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LINDAK25 7/22/2014 5:43PM


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BLAZINGSWORD 7/22/2014 4:55PM

    Oh yes, I am so glad that you are motivated to be healthy!

That is what it's all about. Not just weight loss but to avoid a host of disease and illnesses.

So glad that you stopped in your tracks and got turned around. emoticon emoticon

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KATHYJO56 7/22/2014 4:32PM

    emoticon I'm so proud of you! You totally rock! emoticon

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BEWELL48 7/22/2014 4:27PM

    Love this blog and your stamina!
Thank you for posting!

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    Forgot to mention--last night after bowling, we went out to eat. I ordered a 5 oz. burger that had barbecue sauce on it, and was served open-faced on Texas Toast. As my side, I ordered a fruit cup. When my burger plate came out, it was loaded with delicious-looking crispy fries. Quickly I offered the fries to Du & Chris who shared them, and asked the waitress for my fruit cup. I needed to get those fries OFF my plate immediately, and I am proud to say I didn't even sample ONE French fry. I also pulled the Texas Toast out from underneath my burger and gave it to Du. I could have eaten the fries, and the potato chips that came with my "sandwich" today at lunch, but I would have felt really badly about the choices I made. Instead I feel proud and that is a really good feeling.

On the way home from lunch today, we stopped at a produce stand and I got more peaches, another watermelon and cantaloupe. They are so delicious!

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LJCANNON 7/22/2014 4:18PM

    emoticon We've been through Too Much to stop fighting now! No one said it would be "Easy" but we know it IS "Possible"!!
emoticon Welcome Back!!

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100 Happy Days -- The Conclusion (Days 98-100)

Monday, July 21, 2014

Day 98: We live just southwest of Lincoln, Nebraska, on an acreage. It is a nice place to live, we have neighbors, but they aren't close, since we all have three acres. Juno has lots of room to run, and Du loves playing farmer in the garden and yard. We both love the peace and quiet out here in the countryside. We also both know that moving off the acreage is in our future, with his cancer, he isn't going to be able to take care of this yard forever. But we are putting it off, because neither of us wants to move from here EVER!

We have a nice view of the Nebraska State Capitol Building from our yard. It is easier to see in Winter when the trees aren't leafed out, but even in the Summer, over the treetops, we can see the top of our beautiful Capitol. It makes me happy to be able to live outside of the "big city" and enjoy the serene country, while still being able to see the cityscape from my front yard.

Day 99: I did a Smilebox picture tribute to my sweet pets, Juno (Bulldog) and Neymar (kitty cat who appeared at our house last Fall). You probably have noticed how much I talk about them. I really adore both these little girls. They are sweet and pretty well-behaved, and have wormed their way into my heart.

Day 100: I picked a simple walk down the road with Juno and Du as the conclusion to my 100 Happy Days. I called it a "perfect ending to 100HappyDays." And it was. We had some beautiful weather last week, highs in the mid 70's, perfect for walking, and unheard of around here for mid-July. Today it is to be close to 100, so our brief respite from the heat of summer is over, but it was sure nice while it lasted.

And that is my 100 Days of Happy. I will miss posting a picture each day. It was a good way to remind myself of how much I have to be grateful for, and there is much in my life to make me happy.....from a pint of frozen strawberries sweetened with Splenda, to the lovely lilacs blooming in my yard, to the birth of a new grandbaby, to good results from Du's cancer scans. It ranged from the mundane to the sublime and everywhere in between. I will miss it.

One month ago, for the first time, I joined a Diet Bet. It got me motivated to get back in the weight-loss mode, quit all the snacking, eat healthier at meals, and start walking more. I only lost 7 lbs., but it was 4%, which was enough to get my $20 back. I joined another Diet Bet immediately, since it really seemed to get me back on track. This one is sponsored by Chris & Heidi Powell and it is BIG. Chris says they usually get $100,000 pots. I am once again just hoping to get my $30 back. If I can manage to lose 7 pounds every month, by November, I will be back to 150 lbs., which is my GOAL. Of course I will celebrate when I get to 160 lbs. too, as that was my original goal, and I will always consider it the place where maintenance started.

Today I weighed 175 lbs. I feel good about my mind-set again, proud of myself once more and happy to be back on track. I am also very grateful I stopped before I regained all of my weight. I wish I'd have stopped sooner, but I'm on the way back down the scale again and that is a very good thing! (Please ignore my ugly toenails and feet in the picture below--this is what 63-year old feet look like, especially after 30 years of being morbidly obese.)

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

KSNANA2 7/21/2014 10:20PM

    I agree you should stay in the home you love as long as you can. I don't know the lay of your land but perhaps you could let some of it grow into a wildlife area with native flowers for the butterflies and such. DD and family have 6 acres and they leave part of it natural. DD runs a mower on paths through it once in a while to create walks in a prairie type setting. And that is pretty much to entertain the grandson and give us a place to wander and explore.
emoticon emoticon emoticon

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ASRMOM 7/21/2014 9:02PM

    What a wonderful idea! Thank you for sharing.

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LINDAK25 7/21/2014 4:23PM

    It's so important to find joy in your life. It keeps depression at bay. It helps put things in perspective, too. Whether you're posting your happy pictures or not, you can still journal about those things! Thanks for sharing your joy with us.

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KITT52 7/21/2014 4:04PM


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CANNIE50 7/21/2014 2:39PM

    Your blogs are like a pleasant visit with a wonderful neighbor. emoticon

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PRESBESS 7/21/2014 2:04PM

    Awesome weight loss work my friend! You are definitely on the right track. I am celerbating with you. Keep up the good work.
emoticon emoticon emoticon

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KERRYG155 7/21/2014 1:48PM

    Your blogs have been great. Remember to keep looking for something happy in each day even if you aren't posting it. I love your view! We had a great view, too, when we lived up on the hill off Old Cheney but we couldn't see the capitol building. I think our old driveway is now 52nd street and our brick house is still on top of the hill. You can't miss it as it's the only brick house in the neighborhood.

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KATHYJO56 7/21/2014 12:23PM

    I enjoyed reading your 100 Days of Happiness blogs. It is the simple things of life that makes us the happiest and thank you for sharing yours. emoticon

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KATHYJO56 7/21/2014 12:23PM

    I enjoyed reading your 100 Days of Happiness blogs. It is the simple things of life that makes us the happiest and thank you for sharing yours. emoticon

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NANA2JONEMIMAT 7/21/2014 11:18AM

    Congrats on the 7 lb weight loss.

Re: ugly nails- mine were pretty bad with a fungus under the big toe nail. Had laser treatment done. One yr later it looks better. Yours looks great in comparision.

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LUCYCAN7 7/21/2014 10:24AM

  emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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BLAZINGSWORD 7/21/2014 9:46AM

    I agree with Dee, how about another 100 days?

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IFDEEVARUNS2 7/21/2014 9:29AM

    How about starting another 100 days?

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TUBLADY 7/21/2014 9:28AM

    Have enjoyed reading your posts on your 100 day journey. But don't stop, we need motivation to help us stay on track. It's nice to set goals, have purpose on a daily basis.
Your home sounds lovely, and what makes it so is all the love you have with family and that includes the furry ones too.
Stay in your home as long as possible, the yard, there should be someone in family that can help with that. Or scale back on such a big yard.
Hope the summer continues to be good and that continues on, and on.
Stay grounded, stay positive, be strong.
Hugs Tisha emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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100 Happy Days -- Day 97 (And ANGER at Myself!)

Wednesday, July 16, 2014

Day 97 -- This little guy is just so adorable. At the Bowling Alley Monday night, I was feeding him, and when he was done, I remembered that when his big brother was about that age, I used to take his hands and make him clap, and he would smile, So I tried it with Noah and it worked! His smile really lights up the room, and my life. This little guy makes me so happy every single day!

I was thinking about my behavior over the months between Thanksgiving and when I started the DietBet on June 23, and got control of myself again. What did I do that? How could I let myself get so far off track? I am evidently one of those people who cannot eat right 90% of the time and not be so careful 10% of the time. Once I veer a little off track, I find it easier to keep behaving badly. I never returned to old habits, like eating bags of cookies, candy and chips or stopping at the Fast Food Drive-Thru's, but I ate too many "healthy" snacks. Getting rid of those was really helpful in getting me back on track. I now try to snack on fruit, and then only one snack in the afternoon and one in the evening. Sometimes I even forget to have a snack in the afternoon. ME? Forgot to snack/eat? That is weird. Today for my snack, I sliced up a Missouri Peach that I just bought at a produce stand--delicious and only 40 calories! SCORE! In the evening, I have been having a WW English Toffee Crunch Ice Cream Bar. They are 100 calories, and seem to satisfy my craving for something sweet. For some reason, I can limit myself to only one of those at a time, when a whole box of them is in my freezer. Go figure???

It is a relief to see the scale dropping again instead of headed the other direction. As usual, however, I am impatient and want to see those pounds melt off the way they did in the beginning. It is a proven fact that previously fat people simply cannot eat as much to maintain their weight as those who have never been fat. I try to counter-act that reality by walking more. But, as you know, walking just really doesn't burn many calories. I am finding, as I did before, that your weight loss is mostly dependent upon what you eat.

If I had not let myself get off track, I would not now be having to cut back so drastically in my calorie intake. In order to lose weight at this point, I have found it necessary to consume fewer and fewer calories. Someone sent me a Spark Mail a few months ago, asking how many calories I consumed in order to lose my weight. At first I aimed for 1,200, but as I got closer to goal, I found I had to cut back to closer to 1,000 in order to lose weight. I can eat about 1,500 calories to maintain my weight, and if I had to guess-timate how many calories I consumed during my 30-pound weight gain period, I would say between 2,000-2,500 calories per day. When I thought about tracking my calorie intake during that time, I realized I could not even remember all the snacks I had consumed during the day. That is when it gets scary.

I have been reading Sean Anderson's blog at

Sean is a success story, he lost 275 pounds and kept it off for over a year, before returning to old habits and regaining over 100 of those pounds. He is back on track now, losing almost 50 pounds in the last few months. However, Sean gained so much weight that it was noticeable. I'm pretty sure no one notices my weight gain, except me and my husband, and I am so glad I stopped it before it became noticeable. As much as I would hate to lose the health that I have regained, I might hate it more if people could see that I had gained weight and start those silent judgments of me, which people tend to do with those of us who fight the battle of the bulge.

I was so careful for so long. I still am. I still don't eat cake at parties when it is offered, and just as I like to blame the proliferance of fast food restaurants on every corner for this country's weight problem, I blame my own slippage on those darned so-called "healthy" snacks. They are healthy, fi you can limit your intake. I could not. I won't be buying them again.

I love this time of year, the produce stands are springing up all over and fruit and veggies are good, cheap and healthy. I currently have two canteloupes, a watermelon, Bing cherries, apples, bananas, and peaches in my fridge for snacking. DELICIOUS! I also have six ears of corn, and if I eat one at dinner, sprayed lightly with "I Can't Believe It's Not Butter," it's only 100 calories. This time of year, I can make a nice salad from the lettuce in the garden, and Du & I can make a meal of that, along with an ear of corn. It's unusual for him to be happy with a meatless meal, but this time of year, I can get by with it!

This was my lunch on Monday:

It's 16 Bing cherries, sliced lite peaches (I was out of fresh) and a tomato from the garden, chopped, with lots of pepper--the way I like them! Delicious! I also had a bacon & tomato sandwich, which came in at 250 calories. I have the bacon & tomato sandwiches at lunch, when Du is at work since he is not supposed to eat processed meat, like bacon and sausage, etc. I LOVE BLT's more than he does anyway, and with those great garden tomatoes, they are the BEST. I use 3 slices of microwave bacon at 135 calories, 2 slices of low-fat bread at 80 calories and a tablespoon of lite mayo which is 30 calories. I figure the tomato and lettuce are about 5 calories, for a total of only 250 calories for the whole delicious sandwich. Makes for a very satisfying lunch. I called the plate of food in the picture: Dessert!

We food addicts are the kings of ignoring what we are doing to ourselves when we overeat. I did it for 30 years, and then again in the past several months. It makes me mad at myself, but I'm also proud that I seem to have rediscovered my healthy mojo.

So even though I am having to be extremely careful about what I eat, I think I'm up for the challenge. I remember when I hit my goal weight before, those last pounds came off really slowly, so I can't get impatient and wish the scale would drop faster. I just know it's going to feel mighty good when I can slip back into those size 8 pants!!! AND I WILL!!!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

KITT52 7/20/2014 3:24PM

    glad you are back on are so right, those of us who were over weight for so long , can't ever go back to old habits, not even for 10% of the time....

I understand your issues, I gained back 10 pounds last year...but am back to my goal weight again and have to watch each day what, even healthy foods in my is my struggle and I will deal with it every day....

good luck

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LINDAK25 7/19/2014 10:47AM

    Oh, what a sweet baby. They grow up so fast.

It's great that you've gotten yourself back on track. Fantastic!

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MSLZZY 7/17/2014 9:01AM

    It was time to revisit your goals and see what had changed in your life. With all the worry about Du, I am sure it was easy to get sidetracked. Hang in there! HUGS!

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DUXGRL1 7/16/2014 6:42PM

    You will. All of this is learning what you can handle and what you can't, isn't it? And it's different for everyone, isn't it?

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DIANNEMT 7/16/2014 4:27PM

    I have regained BUT can still wear the size 10 pants. So--I am trying to take the pounds off but there is a chance it is I'm not getting too frantic!

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KATHYJO56 7/16/2014 4:24PM

    Noah sure has a beautiful smile that made me smile just to look at his picture! What a beautiful baby he is! emoticon on getting back on track and losing those pounds that you gained. Also, emoticon to Sean. emoticon

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BLAZINGSWORD 7/16/2014 4:23PM

    Best of you on your journey!

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IOWAGRAMMA 7/16/2014 4:19PM

    Pam, I agree with you. Our weight loss is mostly determined by what we eat, not our exercise (unless someone is really, really into burning calories with exercise). But, for me walking is my go-to exercise and it truly does not burn many, as you said. Sounds like you are making great progress and dealing with everything in a very positive way. emoticon Wishing all the best for you! Jeannie

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KERRYG155 7/16/2014 4:16PM

    You're making me jealous with those BLT's made with homegrown tomatoes!!! I'm so glad you are back on track before any more damage was done. Keep up the good work. You've got a real cutie there and I know you want to enjoy him!

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100 Happy Days -- Day 96 (A Very Happy Day Indeed!)

Tuesday, July 15, 2014

Yesterday in my e-mail was a note that a message was waiting for us in the Patient Portal at Du's Urologist. I was happy to see this message!

We are now 17 months into the initial treatment for advanced prostate cancer, which consists of shots to eliminate testosterone, which stops the spread of the cancer temporarily. The average time this treatment is effective is 18 months, so to hear that it is still working is most encouraging. The longer we can delay subsequent, harsher treatments (chemo, etc.) the better! Plus it says to me that Du is going to be with me for a while and that makes me SO HAPPY!

Du has a bone scan later this month, but the CT scan was last week, and evidently showed what we wanted to hear. He has a shot appointment tomorrow. I will ask his PA, Melissa, to tell me what is the difference in the scans and what the bone scan will show that the CT scan did NOT show. I should know this, but at Cancer Treatment Center both scans are done at the same time (one after the other), so I'm not sure what each of them specifically shows.

When I got the message on the patient portal, I immediately shared it with Du, but I wanted to tell the World. Instead I waited until today to post it on FB, so I could use it for my "Happy" of the day. Then I wanted to tell all my friends here. I know you're all rooting for us on our cancer journey and it's nice to be able to share GOOD news!

I didn't mention in yesterday's blog how I struggled with the steps at the Stadium at the Kansas City Royals game Saturday night. I had to take them one at a time. It's frustrating. I feel like I lost this weight.....regained my mobility.....and now have lost it again. I miss my aspirin. It really helped with my knee pain, more than I realized evidently. Aspirin over-use caused my ulcer, which caused more pain than I am willing to risk, so I take absolutely no aspirin, opting for a couple of Tylenol a few times a week. I am very careful about how many Tylenol I take, because I know over-use of Tylenol can lead to liver damage. Without the aspirin, stairs have become very difficult and painful. I no longer have the breathlessness issue from the exertion of climbing stairs that were part of the problem when I was morbidly obese. Since I have been forced to take steps so slowly, of course it doesn't exhaust me! But it IS embarrassing to have to take the steps so slowly and I find myself avoiding them if possible. We got to the stadium early to be able to get a Salvador Perez Bobblehead doll. They're just silly trinkets, but Du has a hutch full of meaningful trinkets out in the garage from our life together and it will make a nice addition. We were over an hour early for the game, so Du & Chris went to an area where they might be able to get a ball hit out, during batting practice. I was unwilling to go down those steps with them to get to that area, and we got separated. I walked around the stadium to get to my seat, and was in contact with them via Texting, but it was frustrating not to be able to join them in their pursuit of a ball (they didn't get one). I did get in a lot of steps walking around the stadium, however, so that was good. I had to do some searching to find the escalator and/or ramp up to the level where our seats were, because I would not attempt the steps. When they texted me that they were out at the "Outfield Experience" with my grandkids, I wanted badly to go back and join them, but I couldn't find the way to get back down to that level without taking steps. There are no down escalators until AFTER the game evidently, when they change them to go down rather than up. So I headed back to my seat.

I used to think I needed to have my knee replacement surgery while Du was still healthy enough to take care of me during my recovery. Now I realize I another reason I should have it done, is that I need to have it NOW to preserve my mobility, so that I CAN TAKE CARE OF DU when that time comes. I fear we will both be in a wheelchair at some point and that just will not do! So I need to screw up my courage, face the facts that surgery is in my future and get it over with! Any comments from those of you who have had knee replacement surgery would be most appreciated. Will it help with the pain? Will I be more agile? Will I be able to walk up and down stairs more easily? And will I be able to walk further down the road??? Will I be able to ride my bike again? I loved riding that bike the first two summers after I lost weight, but last summer, after getting a new (used) bike, I got on it, and was unable to endure the pain as my legs tried to complete the first spin of the wheels. It hurt so much, my knees just don't bend much at all.

I need to get things moving on this as soon as possible so I could have both knees done before the end of the year, since I am at my stop-loss on my insurance for this year. I hit the limit after my surgery in January. I have other things that also need fixing, I have trigger fingers on both hands that bother me a lot too. I have already had surgery on both thumbs and one finger, but now two other fingers are bothering me, so I need to take care of them. It doesn't bother me when I work on my counted cross stitch projects, to that's good, but it's hard to make a fist, open any jars, or even hold on to anything that is heavy, because it puts pressure on those fingers. It's a fairly easy surgery, the major inconvenience being keeping the sutures covered in the shower (or any water) for two weeks after surgery. It hardly hurts at all. So what am I waiting for? I don't know. Procrastination is certainly prevalent in my nature, obviously.

My dad had both of his knees replaced, but he waited until he was in his 70's. I know that he, like many people I have talked to, wished he had done it years earlier. I am only 63, but I feel like my old body is falling apart. I used to think, as my Dad had several surgeries as he aged, that at least everything he had that was going wrong, was fixable. I am thankful that what is wrong with me can be fixed and I just need to DO IT! Knowing that I won't have to worry about doctors telling me I need to lose weight before I have any surgery is certainly a relief. I do want to lose some weight before I go in to see a doctor about knee surgery however, because I know there will be a prolonged period where I will be unable to do much walking. I am not looking forward to the pain of rehab, but I know it is a necessity. Any encouragement from Spark friends would be most appreciated.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

LINDAK25 7/19/2014 11:00AM

    There's some good advice here already for your knees. Perhaps you could talk to an orthopedic doctor? Get an appointment. The doctor could tell you if there is physical therapy he could recommend for your knees, now. If you strengthen the muscles in your legs, your knees will have better support. You might find that you can wait on surgery or you could be told that you should have it now. I know my knees are not great, but my doctor was able to make suggestions that have greatly improved my mobility and I was able to put off surgery. Ultimately, the decision is yours to make.

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MSLZZY 7/16/2014 7:00AM

    Try not to wait any longer if you need replacements. It will only get harder to recover.
Hope everything continues to stay stable for Du. I pray the doctors continue to work with the situation at hand and he can remain by your side. HUGS!

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DUXGRL1 7/15/2014 10:38PM

    Great news about Du! Hopefully you will find a good solution for your knees.

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LIVE_AMAZINGLY 7/15/2014 8:15PM

    There are several things that can help with knee pain. Taking fairly high amounts of DHA/EPA in the form of fish oil. And, taking Glucosamine/Chondroitin. Taking Turmeric and other herbs also helps.

It's been about 8 years since the doctors told me that I was going to be in a wheelchair within 6 months due to my knee. They did not give me any hope. Natural therapies (above) gave me hope, and I still am a long way from a wheelchair.

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NYKIMMIE 7/15/2014 8:10PM

    emoticon emoticon

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KATHYJO56 7/15/2014 5:16PM

    What wonderful news about your DH! i can only imagine how excited the two of you were. I had both of my knees replaced to regain mobility and I am so glad that I did. It was worth every bit of it. This decision is one that only you can make. emoticon

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KERRYG155 7/15/2014 3:51PM

    I agree with the others. Yes you will get the mobility back but only if you do the therapy. I would say yes to the bike but I haven't tried it because I haven't been on a regular bike in 30 years. I did do some running after my second replacement-even did a 5K though that was more of a fast walk or slow jog.
Great news on Du's scan. Glad he got his bonehead and really sorry you had such problems with those darn stairs. I do remember that awful pain.

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THETURTLEBEAR 7/15/2014 3:29PM

    My mom and my hubby have had the knee replacements with great success, because they both did all the rehab and continued exercise. My dad had a knee replacement and didn't follow through with rehab exercises or continued movement, and continued to have pain. It's all about committing to the exercise and rehab - especially the first three months when it's HARD and it HURTS. Once you hit the three month marker, it's like a cloud has been lifted and you really see the difference.

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BLAZINGSWORD 7/15/2014 10:37AM

    Hi Doll! It's been a long time. I am so glad for your weight loss, you look wonderful!

I've not have knee surgery but my mother and her sister both did. The only advice I can give you there is that it is vitally important to do rehab. My mother did hers, but my aunt, (who eventually had Alzheimer's), refused to do hers. And so my mom recovered and did well. But my aunt had a dickens of a time.

I must tell you it is vitally important to get through rehab to prevent scar tissue buildup. So despite the pain, work through it and ask before hand about the types of pain meds that are available to help you during that time, especially considering the stomach issues you had.

Yes, if you can get the surgery done now, the sooner the better. When cold weather sets in, you don't want to be trying to do rehab with ice and snow on the ground. And you will be able at least to walk again without pain and that's the whole purpose for having the surgery. And at least you will be able to walk and go up and down stairs.

You are correct in saying that you want to get some weight off, but if you have surgery now and do rehab and heal, it will be much easier to get those remaining pounds off. Just IMHO.

God Bless and have a great day. I will keep your husband in my prayers. emoticon

Comment edited on: 7/15/2014 10:40:35 AM

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CBRINKLEY401 7/15/2014 10:37AM

    My friend had knee surgery and said it was the best thing she could have done. She wondered why she had waited so long. Yes, there is the recovery period, but the pain was gone and she was more mobile than she had been in years. Seems their knee problems ran in the family and her brother also had to have it done, with the same positive results.
Hopefully someone with personal experience will be able to chime in with more details of what to expect, but everyone I know who has had it done has not regretted it.
Good luck.

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100 Happy Days -- Days 91-95 (and FEAR rears its ugly head)

Monday, July 14, 2014

Oh My Goodness--My 100 Days of Happy is almost over. I have enjoyed it--mostly. Sometimes I struggled a little to find something unique to be happy about. I always can find something to be happy about in my retirement, but I tried to find something new and different each day. I have kept a calendar by my computer, and each day list my "Happy" for the day so as not to repeat. I realize, I used my Bulldog Juno repeatedly, but she is just so darned cute and makes me so happy, it was hard not to. And sometimes I think to myself, "Having Du by my side should be my happy every single day."

The other day, I read my friend's post on Facebook. She lost her husband to cancer in 2013, and posted that it has been 500 days since he passed away. That makes me realize how much pain she is in every single day, if she is counting the days since he has been gone, and that makes me want to grab on to Du and just hold tight so he can't leave me EVER! If only I could. Last night in bed, I made a silent prayer, as I do every night, that he would stay with me forever. I just can't imagine life without him. And I know I need to value this time I have with him so much more than I do.....because there will come a day when he's not there with me, and I will regret not appreciating more the days I had him with me, to touch, to interact with, to look at his gorgeous blue eyes and amazing red hair, and love him more than life itself. I know I will continue to love him after he's gone, but it will be so hard not to have him with me. The thought of that brings tears to my eyes and scares me so much. YES, I am scared to death. I live with this fear every single day, but try to stay upbeat, because I know I need to enjoy these days I have with him. I'm trying........but as my 100 Happy Days come to an end, I find myself getting a little maybe I will start all over with another 100 Happy Days!

Day 91 -- My lovely daughter-in-law, Laura brought me flowers on the Fourth of July, to thank me for hosting the annual party. It was so thoughtful--she really is a wonderful addition to our family. She is a great mom and good wife and works so hard taking care of my son and my three grandchildren. I love her so much.

There was some white daisies too, but they drooped and I had to throw them out before I remembered to take a picture a few days after the 4th!

Isn't Laura pretty??? (Not to mention my adorable Noah!!)

Day 92 -- Chris got me motivated to get out and take an early morning walk with Juno. It's always fun to walk with someone and talking with Chris as we walk sure makes the time so fast!

It was a beautiful morning!

Day 93 -- We had tickets to the Kansas City Royals game Saturday night, so took off for a road trip! We haven't been on vacation this year, and this might be it--one night spent in KC, so I was pretty excited!

I am wearing a Zach Greinke jersey I got on sale a few years ago when we were at another KC game. He had already left the team when I got the jersey, that's why it was on sale. I did notice a few other people with Greinke shirts at the game, so I didn't feel so dumb.

Day 94 -- Oldest son Mark and his family were also at the game. They sat just down the row from us, so I got to see my two oldest grandkids (baby Noah stayed with Laura's mom). We had a good time, even though it was pretty warm and the Royals lost.

It was great to get home, and as we turned the corner to head down our road I took a picture of the street sign!

Miss Juno spent the day we were gone blocked in our large kitchen (off the carpet). Middle son Brady came out to check on her a couple times and let her outside. But she was very glad to see us when we got home!

Day 95 -- Today I am being lazy. It was raining when I woke up this morning, but I plan to walk later, since the high temperature is only to be in the 70's today. I love cooler temps, especially in July!! Brady brought his daughter Mia with him when he came to check on Juno, and she left me a very sweet note!

It says, "I love you grandma." I love that little Mia and the note made me so happy!

I did fine eating out at restaurants this weekend. We had a meal at Red Lobster before the game, and I had grilled tilapia with broccoli and half a baked potato. I ordered my salad with red wine vinaigrette dressing, for a pretty low cal. meal. For breakfast the next day we stopped at Bob Evans, we don't have any of those in Lincoln. My meal was their low-cal breakfast, tomatoes with scrambled egg substitute, along with whole wheat cranberry pancakes (with sugar-free syrup) and a fresh fruit bowl. It wasn't bad, although the eggs weren't good, (I much prefer my scrambled egg whites that I always order at Village Inn), and the pancakes were awfully heavy. I'd have preferred them without the cranberries too. But the whole thing came in at under 400 calories--so that is good. But once again, snacking reared its ugly head. We stopped at two Convenience Stores (including a Qwik Trip--which must be the king of junk-food stores), and I was weak. I ate nothing at the Ballpark, except a diet soda, but I made up for it with junk from the convenience store both before and after the game. So today, it's back on track. A week from today the Dietbet I entered is over. Before we left town, I had already met my 4% lost goal for the 30 days, but I haven't been on the scale yet, and fear I will have to re-lose some of those pounds. Saturday morning, I weighed in at 174, which is an 8-pound loss from three weeks ago when we started the Bet. I plan to work hard this week to get back there and get my $20 bet back!

I tend to adopt the mentality, "Hurry up and get these pounds off so I can go back to eating." That's a bad mind-set. I need to remember that THIS is for life. Even after I lose the pounds ONCE AGAIN, I need to stay away from snacking. I see recipes for high-caloried desserts and main dishes and want so badly to try them, knowing full-well I should NOT! I haven't been on Pinterest as much lately, but still enjoy watching the Food Shows on TV. I find myself wondering how those women (Ree Drummond, also known as Pioneer Woman; Trisha Yearwood, Giada De Laurentiis, etc.) manage to stay so skinny?! The food they make is definitely not low-cal in anyway. They must practice extreme portion-control, which is something I also need to work on!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

GARDENQE2 7/21/2014 12:28PM

    I love reading your happy blogs!
You are right about extreme portion control..I have been training myself to eat (mindfully and slowly) only one bite, whenever I have a treat food. I am getting close to my goal and it is helping my digestion as well.
But DARN it is a hard thing to do, walking away from something that is yummy!
My Czech relatives said "Esther eats as a bird!" Maybe that should be my new mantra!
Best wishes, Pam!

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NYKIMMIE 7/14/2014 3:08PM

    emoticon emoticon

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TUBLADY 7/14/2014 2:12PM

    You sound like you are really enjoying the retirement and the happy days you have been having.
Don't think they are ending, everyday of our lives should be started and ended with the happy. positive thoughts.
I know everyone is going to have some iffy times. like they say into every life a little rain must fall.
But it doesn no one any good to be unhappy. And if you find yourself in that frame of mind for over a day or two, see the doctor. Depression can be managed
Enjoy the days, don't worry about the tomorrows. Live the moment. We have no control over tomorrow. Let God handle that.
Your son, is looking good. Beautiful daughter in law, grandkids adorable. You hubby looks pretty fine too. So do you. Miss Juno is too adorable.
Take care, you're stronger than you think.
Hugs Tisha emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

Comment edited on: 7/14/2014 2:14:24 PM

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KATHYJO56 7/14/2014 1:15PM

    This is definitely a Happy Blog! Please try to enjoy every day with DU. Every day that we get is a gift from God and even though we can't control the number, we can control the quality. Going to the baseball game was a great thing to do. I love to go to Cleveland Indians games, but don't get to do it very often because as you know, it is costly. I am happy that you had such a good time and you will meet that 20 pounds very quickly because you have an awesome mindset. I love all of your pictures because they spell HAPPY!

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