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9/365 Today of All Days

Thursday, January 10, 2013

I had to skip the gym today. I had to stay home with my dad - hubby an appointment.

Then I get a phone call that the nurses are coming out to make sure that house is safe grumpy n to check his overall health. They also gauge if they feel that we r near burn out or not.

Well the good thing is house is kept clean so all I had to do was run vacuum (this has to b done a cpl times a day). Problem though I had just started a big put of collards 4 m n was working on hubby meal 4 when he gets home, and I was doing my wkly slicing of veggies. Soooo as u can imagine stuff all over the kitchen. still not getting upset I got some time.

THEN I realized there was a bad odor OH NOOOOO; YEA grumpy had an accident (he does this when he is mad @ us). Hubby usually deals w this but he wasn't here. SO FREAKING IRRITATING - IT IS WORSE THEN DEALING W A CHILD. So I already in a bad place - I calmly walk in his room n tell him LOOK I AINT ANDY I AINT ARGUING W U; THIS IS HOW ITS GONNA GO GET UR ASS OUT OF THAT BED GET IN THAT SHOWER. Of course it didn't go easy he as usual tried to do things his way instead of the right way. Once he is out of the shower dressed n bac in his wheel chair. I feed him. Decide to go clean up the bathroom n get the dirty clothes into the washer. But NO that doesn't happen instead due to the smell I sic everything came up. how a grown man can not follow simple directions. I will not gross u out w the details but it took an hr to get that bathroom properly cleaned & deodorized.

Luckily hubby got home right b4 the ladies got here n it looks like he will not only get approved for the program but they may b able 2 help u come up w the money 4 the ramp. The only issue was when they wanted to know what HE would do in an emergency like a fire -he said GO TO MY ROOM

TODAY OF ALL DAYS - I sooo cant wait 2 go 2 the gym 2morrow

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

BEEJAY49 1/11/2013 4:33AM

    I'm so sorry you had such a bad day. HUGS! I take care of my dad, but he doesn't live with us. I know it's not nice but I don't think I could manage having him live in our home like that. I have to clean his bathroom pretty much daily. :( He has a colostomy and a lot of his mess really can't be helped in there, and his eyes aren't so good anymore, so he isn't able to see some of it to wipe it up. They do get stubborn though don't they? Wanting to do everything their own way even if it's not a good way. :( I feel for you. Love you bunches. HUGS!

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LITTLE_QUEEN 1/10/2013 10:43PM


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8 of 365 WHY

Wednesday, January 09, 2013

WARNING - this a whiny blog of ? i ask myself regularly over the past wk; some maybe a little longer. These r questions that I do plan to find answers for. Prayerfully sooner then later. For those of u that know me YES - I m going thru 1 of my depression episodes but I m trying 2 fight it. that is how I came 2 b asking myself all of these questions.

is it getting harder to get up in the morning

does thought of eating stress me out so bad

was it easier to ride the bike a mth ago then it is now

do I seem to b going backwards in what I could do

does the pain seem 2 b as bad as it was after surgery

am I having so much trouble getting to sleep if I m so tired

cant I sleep even half the night thru let alone the whole night

m I needing the nebulizer more then I have since I got over the pneumonia 3 yrs ago

do I feel like giving up

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SIRIRADHA1 1/10/2013 2:49PM

    Sorry you're feeling so crummy right now! I have to applaud your bravery, though -- I always hate to admit I'm getting depressed because all these perky people try to give me advice and I just want them to go away and leave me alone...or at least get them close enough to smack them upside the head!


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BEEJAY49 1/10/2013 5:02AM

    Depression hits a lot of people in the winter and hopefully soon it will subside for you. As to the why's..
The sleeping habits or lack there of can come from the depression.
The thought of eating stresses you out probably because you're working so hard at trying to get the weight off.
You're possibly needing the nebulizer more right now because of the time of year it is and also because you're working out more and that will cause you to have some problems from time to time.
Your stress and depression has probably caused you to hit a plateau. That could be why you're feeling like you're going backwards, not able to do what you did a month ago as easily and giving up.

Just take one day at a time, do the best you can, yep, that sunshine is important for the depression this time of year, so try to get some when it's out. And don't by any means give up. If you have to take it a little slower, do it, just keep doing something! We're here for you! Hang in there! Love you! HUGS!

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DAISY443 1/9/2013 7:40PM

    Maga, I think it is the time of the year when we all get the blahs! Hang in there, keep trying, get some sunshine and take care of yourself!

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7/365 You Do Have Worth - No Matter What

Tuesday, January 08, 2013

A well-known speaker started off his seminar holding up a $20.00 bill. In the room of 200, he asked, "Who would like this $20 bill?" Hands started going up. He said, "I am going to give this $20 to one of you but first, let me do this."

He proceeded to crumple up the $20 dollar bill. He then asked, "Who still wants it...?" Still the hands were up in the air. "Well," he replied, "What if I do this?" And he dropped it on the ground and started to grind it into the floor with his shoe. He picked it up, now crumpled and dirty. "Now, who still wants it?" Still the hands went into the air.

"My friends, we have all learned a very valuable lesson. No matter what I did to the money, you still wanted it because it did not decrease in value. It was still worth $20. Many times in our lives, we are dropped, crumpled, and ground into the dirt by the decisions we make and the circumstances that come our way. We may feel as though we are worthless. But no matter what has happened or what will happen, you will never lose your value.

Dirty or clean, crumpled or finely creased, you are still priceless to those who DO LOVE you. The worth of our lives comes not in what we do or who we know, but by WHO WE ARE.

You are special-Don't EVER forget it." If you do not pass this on, you may never know the lives it touches, the hurting hearts it speaks to, or the hope that it may bring. Count your blessings, not your problems.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

BEEJAY49 1/8/2013 11:59AM

    Thank you for sharing that! :) HUGS!

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KITT52 1/8/2013 9:18AM

    thank you for sharing, it has toughed my heart....
I reread a letter my Dad sent me in 2003, and he said almost the same thing....he told me no matter what problems I had or have I am still a wonderful person.....gee it did not hit me till right now, with the story you told.....I am worth so much no matter what I have done......great lesson to learn

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DARJR50 1/8/2013 9:09AM

  Thank you for this. It has helped brighten my day.

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6/365 My Episodes

Monday, January 07, 2013

Episodes are what I call my panic attacks n my mini depressions.

Well I've had to episodes while @ the gym. The 1st was during a body bump class the 2nd during a zumba class. thing is both episodes happened while we had a substitute instructor. I have realized alot about myself; for example unexpected change is not good for me. Scheduling my days is good for me.

On the plus side I did work thru the episodes & finish each of the classes. So I plan on having a back up plan for when my regular wsls instructors arent there. I also m scheduling every aspect of my life; whether it is my workouts or even my cleaning.

well this is yesterdays blog

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

BEEJAY49 1/8/2013 4:38AM

    I'm glad you could get it under control and finish the classes. I know how hard it is when you get use to an instructor then they're not there. I had to do that many times when I was at the Y. I was an assistant to my instructor and when she quit to move on to better things, I did too. I just couldn't stand the idea of working for anyone else. We should be able to handle any instructor that is helping us, but in reality, it's not an easy thing to do. Congratulations for hanging in there! HUGS!

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LITTLE_QUEEN 1/7/2013 7:43PM

    sounds great and it is nice to know what your triggers are so you can figure out how to work through it

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5 of 365 - Sleep

Sunday, January 06, 2013

SLEEP the mythical creature that always seems to escape; its just out of reach.

This is not new this has been for years. I have trouble sleeping. Its actually been better the past 2 mths BUT its still not close to what it needs to be. Thursday I went to bed around 11:30 pm and I slept until almost 5:30 NOW THAT WAS SLEEP. First time without medication that I got some sleep.

Usually I get up about 2 or 3 hrs of sleep to start then I'm up every hr or 2 for the rest of the night until about 5:30 then I get up.

Tonight was a really rough night; I got up about 3:30 am and took an asthma treatment and took 2 neurotin its almost an hr later and I dont feel any better. Yesterday was my day of rest and I guess my nerves finally realized how much I've been working them emoticon
I do go to bed when I feel tired; there is no tv or computer in my room. It has helped.

Its kind of funny the day that I take off from working out is the day I windup in the most pain

I will continue to work on getting sleep. Sleep is harder to work on the eating right and exercising

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

LIVING4HIM_INWI 1/6/2013 2:17PM

    Ah yes, sleep, the one thing that is really out of our control. Yes, we can go to bed at a certain time, we can try all the tricks, but our bodies don't follow the rules. I used to be able to sleep through everything but now I hear every little sound and it stirs me. Sometimes I'm up for a couple of hours but I still have to go to work in the morning, ugh. I have been trying melatonin and that does seem to help. I hope you find something that works for you. Keep up the great job on exercising!!!

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PIXIE-LICIOUS 1/6/2013 7:01AM

    I agree, sleep is harder to work on that eating right and exercising!

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