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Friday, May 14, 2010

It's silly survey time!! Don't forget to pass it on......copy and paste into your own blog and fill in the blanks!

A - Age: 42
B - Bed size: Queen
C - Chore you hate:
D - Dog's name: Shadow & Chachi
E - Essential start your day item: Coffee
F - Favorite color: blk & burgundy
G - Gold or Silver: silver
H - Height: 5"4
I - Instruments you play: none
J - Job title: homemaker
K - Kid(s): 1 daughter and 2 sons
L - Living arrangements: 2 story single hubby & dad
N - Nickname(s): misfit
O - Overnight hospital stay other than birth: w/ my daughter 4 support
P - Pet Peeve: People talking in church
Q - Quote from a movie:
R - Right or left handed: Right
S - Siblings: 3 brothers 4 sisters 1 sista
T - Time you wake up: 6:00 AM
U- First word that comes to your mind for U: uterus
V - Vegetable you dislike: STRINGBEANS
W - Ways you run late: waiting for someone
X - X-rays you've had: Chest, ankle, hand knee
Y - Yummy food you make: fried chicken
Z - Zoo favorite: owls

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

CSNODGRASS 5/14/2010 10:24PM

    Very cool! I'm glad to get to know you better. I love these silly surveys!!! I'll do this tomorrow!

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    It's silly survey time!! Don't forget to pass it on......copy and paste into your own blog and fill in the blanks!

A - Age: 51
B - Bed size: Queen
C - Chore you hate: cleaning the bathroom
D - Dog's name: Scooby & Paris
E - Essential start your day item: fruit
F - Favorite color: purple
G - Gold or Silver: silver
H - Height: 5"6
I - Instruments you play: piano, trumpet, french horn
J - Job title: grandmama & water aerobics teacher
K - Kid(s): 2 sons & 9 grandchildren
L - Living arrangements: house w/hubby & my son, dil & their 1+ (baby due in July) children
N - Nickname(s): Grandmama
O - Overnight hospital stay other than birth: hernia repair
P - Pet Peeve: liars
Q - Quote from a movie: "A heart is not judged by how much you love, but by how much you are loved by others." (The Wizard of Oz to the Tin Man)
R - Right or left handed: Right
S - Siblings: 1 brother deceased, 1 sister
T - Time you wake up: depends
U- First word that comes to your mind for U: urgent
V - Vegetable you dislike: I like all veggies
W - Ways you run late: oversleeping
X - X-rays you've had: Chest, head, teeth, hip, knee, tailbone, back
Y - Yummy food you make: pecan pie
Z - Zoo favorite: hippo

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MOTIVATION - Mahagony Summer Challenge

Friday, May 14, 2010

5 things that I will do 2 stay motivated during summer challenge

1 - ask 4 help when I need it

2 - not let set backs define me

3 - find a buddy on team 2 stay accountable with

4 - log everything thru out the day

5 - pray everyday

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

RAINBOWFALLS 5/18/2010 7:10PM

    Great goals. The melters are here for you! Go Team!
emoticon emoticon

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    Awesome goals & plan. YOU always keep me inspired! GO MAHOGANY MELTERS! Love ya, Dawn

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TONYA_JO 5/14/2010 6:33PM

    You have a great plan! I think the reaching out for help is the hardest one for me. That's what the team is for!! emoticon

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Thursday, May 13, 2010

The panic attacks continue. But I know this to shall pass I continue to pray 4 healing.

This is the worse episode that I've had in over 15 yrs. The last time that I was this bad was after my ex-husband held me & my children hostage, mind you this was after I left him & moved back to Jersey.

I keep telling myself that tomorrow is the day that all will b better then I get up & dont want to get out of bed. It's been a wk since the initial episode. The only reason that I'm even up now is due to a migraine thanx to my 2 granddaughter then I have fro the night. My daughter is has been such a blessing thru all this has to b @ the hosp 4 test @ 7 am. 1 grand will stay with me the other a friend of mine will pick up in the morning to take to school.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

JUNKINTHETRUNK3 5/15/2010 11:12PM

    I can't imagine going what you have gone through. And I've never had panic atacks. I get very depressed from time to time and just lay down and cry for a while. I've been so fearful that I would develope panic attacks. they sound so frightening. I hope that you will find what works for you. I like to read. When I'm feeling depressed, I pick a book that I've read in the past that made me feel good, and I skim through it and read all the good parts. That can make me feel better getting lost in a good book.

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    Having suffered from panic attacks for years, before therapy helped me with coping, I can relate to your feelings of impotence against them. I found that finding a piece of music that soothed me, then keeping a tape of it always handy was a solution for me. When I felt a panic attack coming on, I'd throw in the tape and get lost in the music to help work through the attack and get back to normal, whatever that is. You are in my thoughts and prayers. Love, Dawn emoticon

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JUDYPETE1 5/14/2010 7:29AM

    You are needed and wanted by those around you (real and virtual). Seek out the help you need, we are here, too.

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CSNODGRASS 5/13/2010 10:17PM

    This too shall pass.

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W8FALNOFF 5/13/2010 4:51PM

    Marcia honey, my prayers are with you!
Hang in there, remember we are never given more than we can bare..God is with you, lean on His strength, I know it seems tough right now, but you are going to pull through this, and the strength you take away from it will be amazing!
Always remember our Lord is just a whisper away!
Hugs and much Love
Patti emoticon

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LOZUKE 5/13/2010 4:41AM

    I am thinking and praying for you. is there a Dr that you can talk to ? I think it is going to take some time too. I am so glad you have your daughter. emoticon emoticon emoticonDebbie. We Live so close, but I don't drive due to my Epilepsy or I wish I could give you a hug in person. emoticon

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WINNIEATWELL2 5/13/2010 1:10AM

    emoticon I am praying for you...Sometimes it takes more tincture of time... emoticon And you'll know when it's time.. emoticon

Comment edited on: 5/13/2010 1:12:17 AM

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Monday, May 10, 2010

I want to thank everyone who has offered me encouragement n kind words while I'm dealing with my panic attacks. Yesterday I left the house to go pick up hubby for his day home (he b home on May 19th for good), Well I probably shouldn't have went yesterday was the worse day for me. Even though I had such a great time w/ hubby home their was just too many panic attacks for me to deal with.

I have an amazing wonderful hubby I m truly blessed to have him in my life. He told me not to worry about anything if I want to just lay in bed then I could & when he comes home he will take care of me. It really does make me believe that everything will b ok.

I go to the drs on Wednesday morning & prayerfully I will b feeling better by then cause I couldn't bring myself to go today. I hate feeling this way n I wish that I could just force it all to go away but it doesn't work that way. The last time that I felt this way was after my ex-husband had held me & my children hostage.

I will continue to pray for guidance. I don't understand why I'm still having such a reaction like this. In my head I know that I was always safe & that the man didn't want to hurt anyone not me or himself. But everytime I go to leave this house I just panic, I can't breathe, my chest feels like its going to explode and my head hurts so bad. Anyone who has ever suffered from this knows that there is no rhyme or reason.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

W8FALNOFF 5/13/2010 4:54PM

    Hang in there sweetie..
This too will pass, but only in God's time!
I am here if you need me..

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LITTLE_QUEEN 5/11/2010 3:53PM

    emoticon emoticon

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CSNODGRASS 5/11/2010 10:22AM

    I'm still praying for you. I have not experienced this, but I can only imagine how terrifying it is. Just hang in there and know you have a lot of people who love you and a lot of supportive SparkFriends.

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LOZUKE 5/11/2010 5:23AM

    I have been thinking and praying for you. I truly believe they will get better soon and go away. We don't know why thy mind work as it does. I will continue to have you in my prayers. emoticon emoticon emoticonDebbie(I am glad you keep us updated)

Comment edited on: 5/11/2010 5:24:27 AM

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DOHAGAN23 5/10/2010 11:18PM

  prayers and good thoughts to u

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DOHAGAN23 5/10/2010 11:18PM

  prayers and good thoughts to u

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YIGOBUTTERFLY 5/10/2010 8:51PM

    I am glad to hear you did get out a little. Is there someone who can go with you to the doctor's? When you do get to the doctor be sure you talk to him/her about what is going on. You have gone through a trauma and may need some help getting over it.

My prayers are with you.

Jane on Guam

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MINDYJ1 5/10/2010 6:43PM

    Praying that these panic attacks will stop! Hugs, Mindy

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Friday, May 07, 2010

Well I haven't left the house since the incident on Wednesday afternoon.

I couldn't even walk across the street. I took the trash cans 2 put them @ the curb n went into a Panic Attack. I was suppose to go to Synod Assembly this wknd but I had 2 back out due to these attacks. I m suppose 2 b preaching on Sunday I m praying that I will b able 2 make it there. The blessing is that my hubby will b here 2 support me.

I m truly blessed to have a few very good friends. One stopped over to go the store for me, telling me let to rush myself thru this. Another friend stopped by to try & get me 2 walk 2 the store n said they will come by tomorrow to try again. He said that I walk & ride my bike to many places not to get over this.

If I m still feeling paranoid over the wknd then on Monday my daughter will b coming over to walk me to the drs. I feel so foolish. Please just keep me in ur prayers. God Bless

Z - I actually got out of bed & sat on the front porch with a friend
E - very little
N - slightly over calories

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

CSNODGRASS 5/9/2010 3:42PM

    I'm glad you have such caring friends. It will take time, but you're a very strong person and with God's help, you'll overcome this. I'll be praying for you.

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TONYA_JO 5/8/2010 11:43AM

    Take it one day at a time. It is great that you have friends coming over to help walk you places. Is there someone at church you could talk to to help get you through the panic attacks.

Hang in there! emoticon

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KMIRANDA2000 5/8/2010 8:30AM

    Sending prayers your way

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WINNIEATWELL2 5/7/2010 10:14PM

    What you went through is/was very scary. It was quite tramatic! I can understand why you would be feeling this way. I think this whole situation would have sent me into a panic mode too. Know you are in my prayers.

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TESSIELU 5/7/2010 9:37PM

    Hang in there! Prayers for you!!!


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MINDYJ1 5/7/2010 9:10PM

    Praying for you! emoticon

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FIGHT2SURVIVE 5/7/2010 8:44PM

    I don't know what happened the other day that started all this, but I do know about panic attacks. I had my first heart attack in 1995. I remember exactly what it felt like. To this day, I cannot tell the difference between a heart attack and a panic attack. I had to go on medication for awhile. But something that helped me far more than the pills was a stupid little paperback book that a friend brought over. It was called "Hope And Help For Your Nerves" by Dr. Claire Weekes. I no longer take any medication but each time I feel myself getting out of control, I can refer back to the book and it pulls me right back to reality. If you can find a copy of it, I really think it may make a difference for you. I'll keep you in my prayers. NEVER be ashamed that this is happening to you. Believe me, there are many many people out there that deal with this every day. You are NOT alone.

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LITTLE_QUEEN 5/7/2010 8:13PM

    I am so sorry you are having panic attacks maga, I will keep you in prayers.

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LOZUKE 5/7/2010 7:52PM

    I am so sorry that you are having these panic attacks now for doing such a wonderful act of kindness. You are blessed to have good friends to help and don't feel foolish at all about your daughter walking you to the Drs. I have epilepsy and when I am getting seizures I have to rely on friends and family to take me places all the time. My independence is gone! You are in my prayers and God Bless you and your family emoticonDebbie

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