Thursday, December 31, 2009
Well as this is my last blog for 2009, I m using as my year end confessional.
I made it thru CHRISTmas without my usual depression, but then the 27th hit. December 27th my mom b-day, this is the 4th since she passed on. As La went to her God-fathers for a cpl days, I was on my own for the most part (other then the usual care of my father & listening to his ranting about his no good wife who left him while he was in the hosp 2 1/2 yrs ago). So the depression hit & big time.
Sunday, Decided i wasn't gonna eat my way thru it & I try not to drink when I'm depressed. Sooo I decided to do some year end cleaning & rearranging my room & cleaned out my closet.
Monday same feelings so really did something stupid & cut off just over 2 inches of my hair. Was gonna cut more but had a drink instead.
Tuesday same feelings so I dyed my hair & moved all La stuff out of her room to the family room (my daughter & her other daughter have to stay with me for a mth so)
Wednesday same depression so I frosted my hair. Was gonna cut off more hair but then had a cpl drinks as to relax.
Thursday today I really feeling it really wish hubby was home but not for another 3 to 4 mths (when will he learn)
the good thing is that I m not staying home tonight I m going to my brothers n spending the evening with his family n his wives family
I really need to find another way to deal with depression but @ least my insurance starts tomorrow so prayerfully I b bac on my meds by the end of Jan
Not sure what hubby is gonna think of the new hair. Most ppl think I've lost my mind cause that was the longest my hair been in years.
MAY ALL OF YOUR NEW YEARS B BLESSED