LWADE1963   18,026
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finally, got it together---sort of

Thursday, October 11, 2012

i think i finally have a routine day for my workout and food.

i do 30 day shred every other day. on days i do shred, i take my dog for a walk. on opposite days, i jog for 30 min. its not a lot of activity, but it is all i can do right now.

i am eating a green smoothie every morning and getting in 2 veggies and 1 fruit. for dinner 2 more veggies and a fruit for a snack;.

the other main obstacle i am facing is night time eating after i get off work. that i am struggling with . consuming 400 calories at night, is just too much. it still fits into my calorie range, but i dont like that many calories before bed.

i am heading to a great day tdy.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

4-1HEALTHYCYNDI 10/18/2012 5:53PM

    I find that if I eat a bigger type of breakfast along with nutritious lunch/dinner I am not hungry for anything after dinner most of the time. Glad you have a routine that works for you now.

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OOLALA53 10/14/2012 10:36AM

    I broke a 30-year habit of eating at night. It was mostly a matter of just doing it. I eat a good dinner every night and learned to distinguish between real hunger and fake hunger, or just that urge to eat. When the urge would come, I'd remind myself I had already eaten and was fine until breakfast, I'd feel better if I wait for breakfast, the urge to eat is just fake, my body did not need food, etc. Then I consciously got involved in doing something else pleasurable or productive. I even went to bed early and practiced some meditation techniques, if I wasn't ready to fall asleep. If I got desperate, I would have one decaf mocha with stevia or some hot milk, but nothing to chew. I don't count calories but mocha or some milk are the only foods I allow myself outside my meals, so it automatically keeps the count down. I find if I chew something, it sets me off, and even if I chew something low calorie one night, the next night, it probably won't be. Savor my meals, and live life in between.

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REBECCATKD 10/13/2012 10:18PM

    I read somewhere that a calorie is a calorie, no matter what time it is. It made me feel better about having a snack at 9:00. As long as you've planned it into your nutrition tracker, you may be fine.

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SAM60SUMTHINK 10/13/2012 1:23PM

    You have balance in activity and foods; it sounds like a solid base. And your healthful focus on nutrient density is great! Love that you are having green smoothies. I have a fruit/yogurt/juice/protein smoothie for one of my meals and have been interested in trying a green smoothie (kale/spinach) but haven't yet gotten brave enough to try it! Your post made me think "it's time to stopping thinking about it and make one!" Thank you for the post and inspiration!

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MIRAGE727 10/11/2012 3:06PM

    Been there! I massaged my calories to eat a solid breakfast and less at night. You can do this!

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BMW9295 10/11/2012 1:33PM

    You have a plan and that is fantastic! As far as the calories before bed... well you in range and as we all know it is metabolized exactly the same no matter what time we eat. However if you don't like ... maybe bigger breakfast,a bigger lunch or bigger snack earlier in the day might work better? Just find what works best for you. None of us are the same and not the same thing works for us.... Just emoticon emoticon

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BIGPAWSUP 10/11/2012 1:00PM

    Hey, you've got a plan in place and it is working! Be proud of that. You can and will make little changes as you go but this sounds like a great baseline. emoticon

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WINNIE1978 10/11/2012 12:47PM

    Good job getting a routine together!

I'm desperately trying to figure out a routine for myself... it appears that setting the alarm clock to wake me up might be the key!

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at home excercise vs gym membership

Tuesday, October 09, 2012

i am simply overwhelmed at the support i have gotten from my spark friends regarding my sister cancer.

she is really struggling and it is breaking my heart. i really dont think i will have here for too much longer. regardless, she is still fighting and hopeful that she is gonna get better.

i am trying to focus on positive things in my life, even tho that is really hard right now. i am finding that with my current work schedule and everything i am doing for my sister, and i try to cook dinner for my son and hubby every day, that i just am not going to gym like i used to. it is a matter of every minute counts. i work afternoon and i usually work 6 days a week. my son is 22 but i do try to cook dinner for him so he will eat somewhat healthy.

i am not complaining. i am thankful that i have a family to cook for and that i have the time to help my sister.

i have been starting to do more workout dvd at home. i have always wanted to do 30 day shred all the way thru. i have always wanted to jog more regularly. so that is what i am concentrating on right now. i feel really good about it.

maybe when things in my life slow down, i will be able to go to gym, but for now, i am happy with my current progress

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MELROSE13 10/9/2012 4:55PM

    Just make the most of your time with your sister, exercise when and where you can to keep yourself strong and healthy for yourself and those around you. Gyms...they do offer extensive resources but your own body is resource enough to get in a great workout..you can do it!

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BLUE42DOWN 10/9/2012 3:02PM

    Sounds like you've already come to the best decision for your situation. For sure, when it adds in commute time in both directions, and carving out a block of time, a gym membership may not be as convenient.

Reminds me of something one of the Spark Coaches (Nicole, I think) said -- roughly that what is important is that we get active, however we go about it.

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MIRAGE727 10/9/2012 1:50PM

    I'm going to be honest here. My wife and I have been going through similar family challenges over the last 7 years. I totally understand the amount of time you must be giving. As for the gym, We have never used a membership. All our cardio and strength training is done on the road and in our home. You're doing the right thing by abusing all the home exercise resources! You can be successful that way.
You also might want to get the rest of the gang into a family meeting and ask them to pitch in as well. ANYONE can cook if they can read! Cooking healthy is easier. Trust me, I do it everyday for my wife. (I also love being domestic god after 25 years of high management in the Pentagon! Yeah, I'm sick!)
I bring reality into and wonder who will take care of each other if I was on "permanent inactive reserve!" I have to take care of myself to live longer for my wife and granddaughter. It's imperative that we take care of ourselves so we can help others. I hope you see where I'm coming from. The family has to work as a unit, especially in these times. I wish you good health and strength. Your family is in my prayers!

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    I think it is wonderful that you are able to be with your sister right now and I am sure you will never regret that choice. I don't belong to a gym either, but I do think about it now and then, especially with the cold weather coming. I am a runner and I am not sure how this will work for me in the winter months with weather and the fact that two nights a week I am having to run and it is DARK! For now, I am playing it by year. I think it also depends how much you want to use the machines, I don't think I would use them too much and get what I need from the sources I already use. I am doing the 30 Day shred, but not everyday, only two times a week, I use it as a supplement for my runs. I also have a Bob Harper DVD that I use as a supplement and then I do lots of pilates and such off of Spark and YouTube. I think you should pick what you feel is best for you at this point and go from there. You have a lot on on your plate right now and don't want to burn yourself out. Take care and will be thinking of you and your whole family.

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BIGPAWSUP 10/9/2012 12:50PM

    You are wonderful for all you are doing. I'm so glad you are getting this time with your sister. You will cherish it later.

As far as the gym, I've never had a membership so I'm not all that certain what I'm missing. Most of the video's are do are right here on Spark. Working two jobs, a 10 to 20 min video is usually all I can squeeze in.

Best of luck to you and your.

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a change in excercise routine is necessary

Tuesday, October 02, 2012

with all the current stress in my life right now, i am neglecting to excercise. i am trying to make some changes to my excercise routine so i can focus more on it.

example, i work afternoon, i am thinking of cancelling my gym membership and concentrate on working out at home to jillian michael or jogging or billy blanks or even p90x. by the time i shower, go to gym , get sweaty, come home. when i get , i have to shower all over again. that is a lot of time consumed in driving to gym and taking an extra shower and doing my hair 2 times.

it seems like 2:30 ( work time) rolls around pretty quickly. my time could be better put to use if i just got up, excercised and then showered. no more 15 min drive to gym. no extra shower. that would give me more time to cook healthy meals.

that is the idea i am playing around with

oh yeah, speaking of work, it is almost time to go. maybe it is the dreary weather, but i have been so tired and sleepy lately. esp today.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SABLENESS 10/13/2012 5:56AM

    When time is at a premium and your energy is going into other things, make every exercise minute count. Working out at home saves you the time of going somewhere and dressing for it, and you can do your workout whenever you have time. I love the short SP videos. On days when an hour at a gym would be impossible, I can feel good about getting in at least a short workout according to the time I do have, not the time I don't.

You can also multi-task. See my blog Dancing in the Kitchen for some ideas of what you can do while you're cooking, washing dishes, etc for some extra fitness minutes.

Wishing you the stamina you need to carry you through this difficult time with your sister.

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DEBBYFROMMT 10/2/2012 3:12PM

    I seemed to have the same problem. I do workout here at home, expect my running, but I can do that when I want and not when the gym's open. Sounds like you have a good plan with different options! Remember, sparkpeople has some good videos too!

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4-1HEALTHYCYNDI 10/2/2012 2:24PM

    I decided to let my gym membership go and exercise at home several years ago. It seems to be working for me. I get up and exercise most mornings before work (or after if I have to go in early). I love the flexibility that comes with working out at home and getting it done early. Makes me feel accomplished. It just takes some discipline to get started.

Good luck!

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JJAQUES41 10/2/2012 2:16PM

    I felt the same way about visiting the gym. With a busy schedule it's sometimes hard to allot the 20-30 minutes extra time it'll take to drive, change, drive back, shower, etc. A work out at home solves that problem. Just make sure that you work out at home and don't find excuses to keep putting it off-that's a downside to exercising at home.

good luck!

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MONAKIN314 10/2/2012 1:45PM

    Great Plan!!!

Go emoticon !!

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GMO_JEN 10/2/2012 1:40PM

    I am so there with you. When stress and a weird work schedule collide, it makes the days more complicate. I think if you have a solid workout regimen, and its something you enjoy and can fit in easier- go for it! I think all three of those programs are great ones. Good luck!

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BIGPAWSUP 10/2/2012 1:10PM

    Sounds like a plan to me. You have to fit things into your life. If that works better then I say go for it.

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MICHIGANLORI 10/2/2012 12:53PM

    You have to do what works for you. Sometimes you just need to experiment. It's so important to make yourself a priority especially when you are experiencing stressful situations.

Good luck in switching things up. emoticon emoticon

Comment edited on: 10/2/2012 12:53:22 PM

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SYZYGY922 10/2/2012 12:47PM

    It doesn't really matter where you work out as long as you find something that works for you. I've been toying with the idea of canceling my gym membership, too, but it's cheap, gets me out of the house, and the location is convenient enough.

I hear you with the stress. During the most stressful times of my life, I haven't worked out at all. It's so strange because it would have helped. It would probably be easier to work out at home because you can just take a short break and do a video.

I don't know about you, but when I get really stressed, I sort of shut down, and that makes it hard, but it's good to take a little break for yourself.

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want to express my gratitiude to every one of you

Sunday, September 30, 2012

i want to thank each and every one of you for responding to my blog about my sister. you guys are the best online community i have ever been a part of.

continue to remember me and my family in your prayers.

i will keep you updated.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

CATBEFIT 10/1/2012 12:10PM


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BIGPAWSUP 10/1/2012 9:12AM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon

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WINNIE1978 9/30/2012 9:09PM

    This really is an awesome community! emoticon

Sending continued thoughts and prayers for you, your sister and the rest of your family too!


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HELP!!! in need of spark support and encouragment during this crisis

Friday, September 28, 2012

i am in need of stremgth and support. my sister was diagmosed with breast cancer a few years ago. recentlly, we found out that the cancer has spread to her liver. the dr told us the other day that she has more cancer cells on her liver than she does liver itself they are doing chemo which will buy her some time . but the dr said it will not go in remission.

this is heart breaking for us. my sister is just so fragile. i watched my dad die with melanoma a few years ago. my dad was strong and never showed fear, not one time. how can i watch my fragile sister die a slow death like this? she has been my rock throughout my life. always there for me in bad times or times i am struggling with life. never judged me for things i did wrong, was just there for me to offer advice and a shoulder to cry on - day or night.

i have 3 sisters,a brother, and a mom. the last few days i have watched all my sisters just cry to the point of not being able to even talk. i love my sister as much as they do. why havent i been able to cry? could it be because i am being strong for them? or because i have been through this before and i am cherishing each moment until it ends? i just wish i could cry.

i am just in need of some support and encouraging words right now.. who else can i go to besides my stong spark friends and community

she is 59 and i am 49. all my sister and brother are between those ages.

thank you my dear spark friends for always being there.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MONAKIN314 10/1/2012 3:30PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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PAMATX 9/30/2012 2:51PM

    I'm so sorry about your sister. You'll cry when you're ready. I found that out recently as I'm going through something similar with my dad. I cry alone in bed at night. Or in the morning. Then I get up, and become the rock again. Most of the time.

Lots of hugs.

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CATBEFIT 9/30/2012 12:15PM

    I am so, so sorry your sister has to go through this -- and can only say that it is a blessing that she has siblings who care and love her during this time.

I am also so sorry that you have to go through this too. I lost my brother six years ago (at 53 yrs old) to melanoma that spread to his liver. I stayed pretty stoic until nearly the end -- because I was there for my SIL and nephew. Don't question yourself -- you are doing the best you can -- and you will grieve in your own way and your own time.

Wishing you peace and moments of joy with your sister in the coming days.


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GMCTERRAIN 9/30/2012 9:46AM

    Sending thoughts, prayers, and positive energy your way.

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DONNACFIT 9/30/2012 9:10AM

    Sending hugs and prayers..so sorry..

Stop by any time to talk...God will give you strength and he is there always to lean on

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KELLY122581 9/30/2012 5:50AM

    emoticon I am so sorry you are going through this. Everyone grieves in his or her own way.... do not feel bad that you aren't crying! The way you are dealing with this is just fine..... as long as you are there for your sister in her time of need, you don't need to worry about anything else. Your tears may come in time, or they may not.... it does not mean you love your sister any less. In belgium, the greeting we give to people going through a loss is "sterkte" which means "strength" .... so wishing you all the strength to get through this rough time!

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MELROSE13 9/30/2012 1:01AM

    I can not even imagine what you are going through...it sounds like you need to be for her what she has been for you, strong and just there for her. Treat her as you always do to keep her life as normal as possible...be there for her to cry to if she needs it, and to laugh with when she needs it. I think you are still in shock, maybe that is why you can't cry right now..but you will and you need too.
I am sorry you have to deal with this, I have 3 sisters and can not, and won't even try to think what you are feeling..just love her and be there that will be what helps her through!

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THETURTLEBEAR 9/29/2012 11:46PM

    Very sorry! emoticon emoticon

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GALVINROBERT 9/29/2012 8:34PM

    I was just at Church at a party for a priest that was leaving the parish. I think someone suggested that I cry. But I thought of a beautiful lampshade I just bought, white with roses patterned on it, and pink cotton tassels hanging down. Then I thought of a beautiful rose bush in the neighborhood. I held back my tears and remained strong. I feel better for it. Art keeps you sane. Every rose bush has its thorns. That doesn't make them less beautiful!


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TWEETYKC00 9/29/2012 7:58PM

    I am so sorry for you and your family. I wish there was something that could be done for your sister. Sending hugs for everyone.

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LYDDIECAT 9/29/2012 7:39PM

    I'm sorry. Hugs to you and your family.

emoticon emoticon

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WILLAMLC 9/29/2012 6:44PM

    I am sorry for this very difficult situation your family is going through..... Do not blame yourself for not crying. Each person reacts in a different way... My thoughts and positive energy is with you and your family.

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BEARGODDESS 9/29/2012 6:37PM

    I'm so sorry for the pain that you, your sister and your family are going through. SABLENESS has an excellent idea about contacting Hospice care. They were wonderful with my father and then again with my mother-in-law. Your tears will come. There is a part of you which is probably trying to be strong for your family. I tend not to cry immediately when something heartbreaking is happening, but later when things are more peaceful. Take the time you have left with your sister and cherish it. You are in my thoughts and prayers.


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SEASONS__CHANGE 9/29/2012 5:23PM

    Sending you some positive healing energy to you and your family during this difficult time.

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WINNIE1978 9/29/2012 12:21PM

    I'm so sorry about your sister. I will keep you both in my prayers. emoticon

By the way, not crying doesn't mean that you love your sister any less than your other siblings. Everyone deals with news like this differently. Maybe you are trying to be strong... or maybe it hasn't totally sank in for you just yet.


Comment edited on: 9/29/2012 12:23:43 PM

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MADAMES 9/29/2012 7:54AM

    Hugs and prayers.

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NYKIMMIE 9/29/2012 7:27AM


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HARROWJET 9/28/2012 11:12PM


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TEDDYBEARGIRL 9/28/2012 7:40PM

    Prayers going up for you all

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CARLYG8 9/28/2012 6:21PM

    I am here if you need to talk. I just lost my niece to cancer 10 months ago. I struggled with so many emotions during her long battle. Praying for you and your family during this difficult time. ~hugs~ Carly

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MOMMA48 9/28/2012 5:10PM

    emoticonI'm sorry to hear your sad news. You and yours are in my prayers.

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ANDI571 9/28/2012 4:53PM

    I am so sorry. Life at times can be so harsh. I tend not to cry at these types of moments also. I agree with Pooka who said it might be a defense mechanism. I am sure you are trying to be strong. Love will see you through. Cherish the moments you have left, you will never regret it. There might even be a time when the two of you will cry together. Your love for one another will let you know what to do.

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SABLENESS 9/28/2012 4:39PM

    My heart goes out to you and your family. Taking a moment now to pray for all of you....

I hope your sister and your family have been encouraged to talk with Hospice. We've been there with my grandmothers, a dear older friend, and my young nephew. They are the best at helping everyone with their different ways of dealing with things.

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4DOGNIGHT 9/28/2012 4:18PM

    You will need lots of hugs! emoticon

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ARCHIMEDESII 9/28/2012 4:09PM


You're totally overwhelmed. When I found out my favorite cousin had suddenly died of a heart attack, I couldn't cry at first either. I think the shock was too much. Eventually, when the realization of what had happened struck me, I cried and I mourned for her.

There is only so much you can do. That's why you have to do the best you can. Even though your sister is very ill, she is still here with you. You can still spend time together. Enjoy and cherish that time with her. That will give you some solace.


Comment edited on: 9/28/2012 4:10:47 PM

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MARIAJESTRADA 9/28/2012 3:55PM


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POOKASLUAGH 9/28/2012 3:51PM

    First off, I am so so sorry to hear this news! Second, I completely understand about the not crying. It's a defense mechanism. When something really sad happens in my family, to the people I love more than I love myself, something inside me shuts down. If I cry, or get upset, or anything like that, my brain tells me that I'm lying to everyone, that I'm faking it, that I'm acting melodramatic to get attention. I know that this isn't the truth - the grief is real - but this is my brain's way of handling the grief. Often, I can't cry at all, but later will bawl my eyes out when a character in a book I'm reading dies, as if I just lost someone I loved, and I know this is grief transferred. So don't be angry or frustrated or upset with yourself - you can't help the way your brain reacts. *hugs*

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NKOUAMI26 9/28/2012 3:48PM

    emoticon emoticon
I will commit your family to my prayers. Life is what it is, but we are grateful for all the wonderful times we have with our loved ones. Be strong and courageous

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REMEMBER2BME 9/28/2012 3:19PM

    I am so sorry to hear this. But you are strong and it sounds like you are handling this the way you know best. I hope this does not offend you ... if so ... just stop reading. My golden retriever had cancer. It sounds crazy but I have no kids and se was my best friend. She was te one that was there during te very most difficult time in my life. Long story very short. When she got cancer it was indescribable, however, I knew that we would simply do all we could do and take it one day at a time. I was strong. I broke down at odd times. as strange as it sounds i sometimes watched a sad movie so I could just get it out.

I think it was because instinctively I felt the need to hold it together. She had 4 years of chemo, went into remission & then it came back. Cancer and chemo in dogs is very different. i was lucky. She never got sick. The end was excruciating but I was there. I was always there until I finally told her that it was ok, that she could let go.

We are here for you.

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4-1HEALTHYCYNDI 9/28/2012 3:05PM

    My dear sweet strong friend. I wish there were words of wisdom I could impart to help you through this very trying time. Watching a loved one die from cancer is just about the hardest thing any one of us has to go through in life.

As for why you can't cry... yet. Everyone handles the stress and shock of something like this differently. I believe you will cry when you are ready. You are still processing the news and probably being strong for your family. You are probably their rock and the one they turn to for help.

The only thing I can do is to be here for you when you need to talk, vent, cry, rail or even just sit together in silence. You will make it through this.

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BIGPAWSUP 9/28/2012 2:55PM

    Spend as much time with her as you can. Cherish every moment, you can and will grieve later. When my mom was passing, I spent every moment I could with her. I do not regret a single minute. I cherish them.

This is also a good time to share memories, they will be your rock later.

And just make certain she KNOWS how much you love her, and that you KNOW how much she loves you.

I pray for peace for your family.

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SHERYLDS 9/28/2012 2:47PM

    The best you can do is let her know just how special she is and how much she means to you. Make the time you have with her count towards letting her know just how important her being who she is, means to all of you

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KONOHA-NIN 9/28/2012 2:11PM

    So sorry to hear this! People react differently... emoticon sometimes a person may be in so much grief and shock that tears do not come. Your love for your sister and the rest of your family is there regardless of how it manifests externally. Thinking of you and hoping you can stay strong...

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LWADE1963 9/28/2012 2:08PM

    Wow! You guys are so great!! Thank u for all the prayers and encouragement!!

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NEEDBU66 9/28/2012 1:42PM

    Saying a prayer for you now.
There is no way to just hand you a platitude that will make you feel any better...this is devastating news and no getting around that.

I'd give you a hug if I could only reach.

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DIETER27 9/28/2012 1:34PM

  First of all This is a hard time and God will get you through this. I believe you are being strong for them that is why it may be hard for you to cry right now. emoticon Here is a poem I turn to when I feel down it is called Lord Help me See by Dottlee Duggan Reid
Lord, Help me see Thy mercy in the rsing ofthe sun.
Help me to enjoy your Love while lif'e's race I swiftly run.
Help me to see Your patience in the raindrops that fall.
Help me to see Your wisdom
In each thing, large or small.
Help me tosee Your goodness Lord When My world is caving in.
For Lord, Constanly remind me You're my Father and my Friend!

May God bless you through these times and hover his blessings over you.

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GLORYB2014 9/28/2012 1:32PM

    I'm very sorry to hear about your sister and I'd say the best thing is to try to be strong for her sake and just to be there for her. I don't cry easily, even when it's drastic news, so I understand how you feel there. Tears will come when they need to flow. It is very cleansing and relieving when the tears do come.

We've had several in our family who fought cancer and my own daughter is one of them, she had breast cancer and had one breast taken off and chemo last year. She will be having the other one taken off too. She remained strong and positive throughout it all and that helped the rest of us too.

I don't know what to say to you except "Stay as strong as you possibly can, cry when you feel the tears are right there, support your sister and your family as you are able to and don't give in to despair". Miracles do happen, believe it!

Keep blogging to let us know how things are going!
emoticon emoticon

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BLWOODMANSEE 9/28/2012 1:31PM

    You will have to be her rock. Prayers go out to you and your family in this time in need. God bless emoticon

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-POLEDANCEGIRL- 9/28/2012 1:29PM

    emoticon Sending you hugs and prayers during this time. Its ok to be the "rock". Just make sure you get your time to release your emotions too.

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MELLIE1030 9/28/2012 1:27PM

    There are no words I can say to help make you feel better. I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers. emoticon

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RUNNER12COM 9/28/2012 1:27PM

    There is no right or wrong way to get through this. If your siblings are crying, that's okay for them. If you are not, that is okay for you.

Please don't waste an ounce of energy or a single moment of time worrying that you are not "doing this right." None of that nonsense matters. All that is important now is that YOU and your sister are making the most of every second you have together.

I'll keep your family in my thoughts and wish you all the strength possible in this tough time.

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LEANANDFREEAT23 9/28/2012 1:26PM

    I woudn't feel embarassed about not showing as much emotion at this point. I think the emotion will come in time, I know that happens for me sometimes too (never been through something like this though so I won't compare the pain).

My heart goes out to you for the loss you've already had and getting news like this, will definitely remember you in my prayers.

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MISSKITKAT2 9/28/2012 1:25PM

  emoticon I will be thinking of you in your time of need.

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