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Terrapin 5k Race Report (with pics)

Sunday, August 05, 2012

As some of you may know, a good friend of mine from high school passed away recently. After this happened, it made me look at my own life closer, and I wanted to live it more. So many times we say we don't have time for things, or say, "Oh, we will do this or that later." Well for the cup of coffee that my late friend and I kept saying we would grab, that time never came.

After this happened, I made a lot of calls to my best friend since freshman year of H.S., Cheri, and I brought up the Terrapin. A few months back I mentioned it to her since it is a race we talked about doing often - she is a big Grateful Dead fan and this race is not only named after a Dead song, but hosts a concert during and after the 5k and the headliners are a Grateful Dead cover band. But at the time she was planning a big move out of state to Colorado and I was interviewing for a new job and packing up my old office. It wasn't, as they say, good timing. So we had sort of shelved it.

But after our friend died, we decided that life was short and we should do it. I told her that I would pay for half of her plane ticket, but she wouldn't let me, so instead I bought our hotel room to stay in that night and bought our race entries. As the race grew closer the timing got even worse - the Monday before the race she moved to Colorado into her new dream home, and I started my new job. I told her I would understand if she had to cancel. She wouldn't hear of it. She said if it was anyone else, yes, but that she would never let me down like that. I have the best friend ever. I really don't know many people who would do this.

Well I have to say it was all worth it! To say we had a great time would be an understatement. (I'm waiting for the official pictures to come in, but I'm hoping they captured her dancing to "I'm Sexy and I Know It" while running, people came up to her afterward and said it was the highlight of the race for them!

It was hot out, it was supposed to cool down to 75 from 90, but I don't think it cooled down much, it's the hottest race I've done, I had beads of sweat all over me and even sweat dripping from my ears when it was over with, and I don't sweat easy! But worth it.

Us before the race.













The view at the turnaround spot


The goodies after the race - a donut and a veggie quesadilla



Cheri taking a balloon off the post for a young boy - you should have seen his face light up when she handed it to him!



Us after the race - official time was 39:29



We also each got a free beer and Nuts on Clark mixed popcorn - yum!



The moon was beautiful! Later it turned white.



Mr. Blotto - music and dancing.



Then Cheri took me to a yummy Mexican restaurant and we had dinner and a margarita.

Afterward at the hotel in our Terrapin shirts enjoying some wine and sharing laughter.



Having this time together in the city brought back great memories of one of the best years of my life when we both were single and lived together in the city. It was so nice to have that time without the kids and husbands.

Is there something that you've been putting off? Just get out there and do it. Life is short.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

LOTUSLIFE 10/23/2012 3:09PM

  This is a great story and blog. The pictures are fantastic!

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SPSPSP1 9/5/2012 5:18PM

    Good for you!

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CHICAT63 8/15/2012 12:14PM

    I read your blog and had tears in my eyes, you are so right life is indeed short. Looks like you had an amazing time with your best friend, love your headbands they rock. Keep encouraging each other ! emoticon

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LINDAKAY228 8/8/2012 7:04PM

    Life is to short and I'm glad you and your friend did this! Looks like you had an awesome time. I'm so excited for you!

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MUSTANG_SALLY2 8/7/2012 11:59AM

    I am so glad you made this a priority! I agree, life is too short. I have this long list of things I want to complete. Slowly marking them off as I go.

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WORKOUTWITHPAM 8/7/2012 3:19AM

    Looks like you guys were having WAY TOO MUCH FUN!!!!!! emoticon emoticon

What a wonderful day for you and your friend. CONGRATULATIONS on your accomplishments. Keep up the GREAT WORK!

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AMBER281 8/6/2012 11:10PM

    Looks like you gals had a great time!

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KITHKINCAID 8/6/2012 6:41PM

    I love this blog so much. I've just had a reunion of sorts with some of my girlfriends from school and it was so amazing. So glad you ran a great race AND got to catch up with you friend!

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INSPIREBYNATURE 8/6/2012 11:31AM

    You two look like you had SO much fun! I'm so glad you got to celebrate the life of your friend and catch up on old times!!!!! You are SO beautiful! LOVE YoU!

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JENJESS48 8/6/2012 10:23AM

    That's so great, Kathy! I'm really proud of you for seizing the moment and not letting life's pressures get in the way; that's really hard. emoticon

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NELLBELLA26 8/5/2012 9:43PM

    omg what a beautiful friendship you have! I love stories like this because you are SO right. Life is too incredibly short to let anything get in the way of doing the things you want to do! Enjoyed the pictures. thanks for sharing!
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IGSBETH 8/5/2012 7:49PM

    Way to go! I'm glad you had such a great time!

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MOMFAN 8/5/2012 6:47PM

    emoticon

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PLUSSIZEWIFE 8/5/2012 6:16PM

    Awesome! You made great time, not to mention you look like you had a blast.
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KATD13 8/5/2012 4:24PM

    Thanks for sharing your race day with us! I am always looking at the various, local 5K's. I want to do one so bad, but always have an excuse. Some are legit & some are lame...but the bottom line is, I still haven't done a 5K.
I love that in spite of everything, you & your friend made it happen!

I certainly know that life is short: Regardless of your age, tomorrow is not gauranteed.

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RUNNERRACHEL 8/5/2012 3:30PM

    emoticon

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TEMPEST272002 8/5/2012 3:05PM

    I'm sure your highschool friend was smiling on the two of you as you raced and laughed in her honour. Thank you for sharing this experience with us.

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COACHKRYSTIE 8/5/2012 1:39PM

    Great pics!! Thanks for sharing!!! What a great day!

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JILLIANISREADY 8/5/2012 12:41PM

    Sorry about your friend from high school. But on a good note that is awesome you girls could run that together. Worked out perfectly. I recently too had a friend pass away that I went to school with from 1st grade until we graduated (I gradated 7 years ago) but will never forget him. & that too just made me realize that life is short -- live it while you can.

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UNICORN212 8/5/2012 11:50AM

    I love both your smiles in the first pic. I am so glad you had a good time and the weather was decent. I hope you remembered to toast your deceased friend when you got to the beer.
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RED_WRITINGHOOD 8/5/2012 11:24AM

    That's awesome! You looked like you had so much fun. It's great you guys made sure that you got together.

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LASKIE2 8/5/2012 11:13AM

    I'm sorry to learn about the loss of your friend, but your pictures shows a very loving relationship and a good time enjoying something you both loved - quantity time together.

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GETFIT2LIVE 8/5/2012 10:47AM

    It's so easy to let the tyranny of the urgent rule our lives instead of living intentionally. So glad you and your friend made time for something that was important for you to do together. Looks like it was a wonderful time and well worth all the effort--way to go!

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TRAVELGRRL 8/5/2012 10:31AM

    Glad you had such a great time! I'm so glad you both took the time to spend with each other. You are right; life is short.

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HOLLYS_NEW_LIFE 8/5/2012 7:52AM

    This is an awesome post! It really makes yo utake time to think about all the things you say you'll ge to, but then never do. I'm so glad you were able to do this and spend time with your friend.

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Voted Popular Blog Post: View All Popular Posts

NSV at the DMV (Photos)

Thursday, July 26, 2012

I can't tell you how much I dreaded showing my license - ever - to anyone. The checkout lady at Trader Joes, to verify employment, to prove residency, every time I had to take that thin piece of plastic out of my wallet I cringed. 8 years of this hatred for my Driver's License picture. We all can take bad pictures, but this one was bad with a capital "B"! First, I didn't realize I was getting my photo taken, the person ahead of me just got a reprint of their last photo, which is what I was secretly hoping for, as I had gained over 100 lbs. since my last DL picture. But no, that camera silently snapped just as I realized (too late) what was happening. I had a bit of a hair mishap, too (it was a windy day) and I was generally not a happy person, living larger than I should be and showing it on the outside.

And as I lost weight, it would cause confusion. The guy carding me to get into a bar would do a double-take, was that really me? The cashier at Trader Joe's once gave me a side glance and said "You go, girl." See, I wasn't the person in that photo. Not anymore.

Since I'm a good driver, I usually renew over the phone, so I have lived with this bad picture for 8 long years. But since I needed to take the vision exam again (they only give you so many free passes), I had to physically go in and get my new license, and get a new photo.

I was so excited for this change to "redo" my terrible license picture. Not only because this time I would be prepared and smile at that tiny blue light, but because I was thinner by 105 lbs., too. BONUS!

Here is my comparison of the old to new. I feel 10 years YOUNGER, not older, and I feel like I've been given a new chance, at the DMV...and in life.

I also updated my weight on my license to be my goal weight - 178. I'm not there yet, but I will be. (And the weight on my old DL I never updated with my weight gain, so it always read 180. A white lie at the time that is slowly coming true.)

EDITED: I want to add and make it clear that I EMBRACE who I was. I truly do. You can read my blog "Pictures on the Shelf" below if you would like to read more about that.

www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_jo
urnal_individual.asp?blog_id=4833401


But this is a HUGE NSV for me and I am going to celebrate it. Embracing a terrible picture of yourself on your Driver's License (how many of us dislike these photos) is not the same as embracing who you WERE. Now I have a little slice of this new life in my wallet and I like it, and I AM going to celebrate it. I deserve to. Too much of my life has been spent looking backwards at my past, and not living in the CURRENT. Now my Driver's License has caught up to who I AM and I will not just let that go by without tooting my own horn. Sometimes we need to be our own cheerleaders - that's my secret to getting through the hard times.

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And it is nice not to erase, but to re-write history.



(To see a larger image I also uploaded this picture to my Spark page).

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

JOANNHUNT 12/10/2012 3:02PM

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You are a emoticon

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LOWFATFOODIE 8/13/2012 4:45PM

    Great post! Love the NSVs!

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PRESBESS 8/6/2012 1:56PM

    So awesome! I really like your new DMV photo. You look confident!

I kind of did the same thing a few years back but not neccessarily because of weight, but because I was so tired of having horrible drivers licenses' photos. When the time came around for me to get my picture taken (4 years ago) I made absolute sure it was going to be a good one. I purposely did my hair all up, had on a nice top, lipstick and all. I must say, I really love my pic on my DL. I happily show it and have even gotten a few compliments on it. When I took it I was on WW and had reached a somewhat comfortable weight, however, now I'm about 25 pounds less than I was at that time. Woo-Hoo!

Glad you are super happy with your DMV photo. Rock it girl!

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ROEANDGO 8/4/2012 3:14PM

    Amazing NSV!!
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GETTINGFIT4HIM 8/4/2012 3:04AM

  What an amazing and inspiring transformation!! emoticon

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RED_WRITINGHOOD 8/4/2012 2:38AM

    You are so cute!! You look amazing and I love the pixie cut!

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KIN59VARA 8/3/2012 2:25PM

    WOW, That is amazing. I love your background!

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INTOTHESOUTH 8/3/2012 2:20PM

    Congratulations!! I'm actually looking forward to taking a new me picture myself here in a few weeks!

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MANILUS 8/2/2012 12:34PM

    Big difference between photos, congrats on your success and keep up the great work!!!!

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CATDUG19 8/2/2012 10:18AM

    A fantastic blog. You definately look 10 to 15 years younger. I think these little pick me ups are very important to our egos. I am due this year for a new drivers license and health card pictures on my birthday which is also my goal weight date so I am looking at booking a hair appointment and getting all dolled up

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FATBASTICH 8/2/2012 9:06AM

    Sometimes the seemingly little things can really give us a boost. Congratulations!

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LYNNIERN 8/1/2012 8:53PM

    Congratulations on your success! I'm going to borrow your excellent philosophy of updating the weight on the license to be my goal weight. emoticon

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MUSTANG_SALLY2 8/1/2012 11:46AM

    Wow. That really shows how hard you've worked!

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ADARKARA 8/1/2012 10:17AM

    So many people have mentioned that their driver's license has their weight on it, that I had to check mine. Thank you New Jersey for not asking me for that!

Love your new photo!

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JULBEL 8/1/2012 10:02AM

    105lbs and how many years -it looks like at least 10

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LOOZINITNOW 8/1/2012 9:52AM

    Awesome NSV!!! emoticon

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LUCKYONE60 8/1/2012 12:30AM

    Love it!

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LESSISMORE2010 8/1/2012 12:12AM

    You look absolutely amazing! Congrats!!

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IAMLOVEDBYYOU 7/31/2012 2:13PM

    You look amazing!

On a related note, I am also from Illinois and didn't know that you could renew your drivers license over the phone!

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SHERRY28269 7/31/2012 11:12AM

    Now, you must want to show the DL to everyone! Great job! It is the little things that count. emoticon

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YORKIE_GIRL 7/30/2012 10:57PM

    You look marvelous!!!!

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STACYJANE77 7/30/2012 3:20PM

    That is awesome!

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WILDBEANERZ 7/30/2012 3:18PM

    Congrats! I get my new one next May. I can't wait!!

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CYNTSATIONAL 7/30/2012 3:18PM

    You go! Keep SPARKing!
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AMBER281 7/30/2012 1:46PM

    That is amazing!!
I am so happy for you.

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BMCKEOW1 7/30/2012 1:01PM

    That is so awesome. You look great. I would be doing a happy dance. I hate pulling out my DL. One cause I hate the picture I think they purposely take it when you are least ready for it. Also I'm bigger then I want to be in it. I also lied about my weight, but I'm almost at that weight. When I renew my license which is still a little ways off I can't wait to see that picture.

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JENJESS48 7/30/2012 10:29AM

    Just incredible, Kathy! I'm so proud of you!

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LOTUSFLOWER 7/30/2012 7:08AM

    God bless you Kathy .For listening to the Lords word. For reaching for support when you knew you needed it.I'm so proud of your journey.It has been hard fought with failures and struggles.With victories and life changers.Through it all I loved you and I always will.
Your incredibly lucky husband Jim emoticon

(Written by my husband Jim, who hijacked my Spark account as he doesn't have one of his own, LOL "))

Comment edited on: 7/30/2012 7:12:07 AM

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IM_POSSIBLE 7/29/2012 9:45PM

    That's AWESOME! emoticon emoticon

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SUSUSUZZZIE 7/29/2012 9:34PM

    Congrats! I can't wait for a new DL pic! Thanks for sharing with all of us!

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SERASARA 7/29/2012 5:42PM

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WOMANATWORK1 7/29/2012 3:01PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

Thanks for the reminder!!! Have to keep that in mind when my day comes! And I better be thinking about my bank cards too, while I'm at it!! emoticon


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MAGGIEROSEBOWL 7/29/2012 2:43PM

    What a great new picture, although your old one really isn't so bad. I always listed myself as 280 lbs. (when I finally realized nobody was buying the 135 lbs. I put down as my weight for a few years!). I'm definitely not renewing my license on-line this year either, as I'm excited to get a new picture taken. The old picture is from 328 lbs., and now I'm at 150. I only ever had one person notice the difference however. I don't have to give out my DL for ID very often, but when I was applying at our Public Schools to be a substitute teacher last Fall, the lady noticed. Not only did she notice....she asked me all about my weight loss. She had gained some weight and was wanting to take it off. A familiar predicament!

I love the commercial (I think it's for Weight Loss Center...or one of those?) where the gal is checking in at the airport security counter and the clerk just keeps looking at the license and then up at her suspiciously. She has obviously lose weight. She just smiled shyly, then he finally says, "Welcome home." And she says "Thanks." I LOVE that commercial.

I still have the remnants of my double chin (I call it my "wattle") and I'm OLD, but still looking forward to my new "skinny" DL picture, which I will get in December since my birthday is Jan. 1. It's funny what we find can excite us when we lose weight~!

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LOSINGITNOW11 7/29/2012 2:27PM

    Great Job!! You look so much younger!!

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THETROUT 7/29/2012 2:14PM

    Good job!

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RANDOM00B 7/29/2012 12:53PM

    Oh, that is AMAZING! emoticon

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LEALOWE 7/29/2012 10:58AM

    You look amazing. Like a completely different person. However, the old pic wasn't as bad as you thought : ) I think we all do that, including myself. Congratulations on your achievement and your new license : )

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DONNACFIT 7/29/2012 10:06AM

    Great blog! Congrats on the weight loss!! I love your background picture..did you just take a photo of your motivational collage? What a great idea and it turned out great!

Keep on Sparkin'

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MILMOM2000NEW 7/29/2012 9:07AM

    Wahoo!!!!!!!!!!!!!! You rock and what an inspiration to see how something as simple as a Driver's License picture can make a huge smile on someone's face! I too remember getting that GOOD picture and the feeling it gave me! Blessings to you always! You look amazing!

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ANNARUTH2 7/29/2012 7:39AM

    Good for you!

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NANCYHOME247 7/29/2012 6:43AM

    I like the idea that a driver's license can tell such a happy story! Your license photos are amazing. I recently enjoyed the flip side to your story:

You see, this summer I had my license redone because in the past 15 years, my age caught up with my face. The last straw was going through an airport security check and seeing the doubt in the attendant's eyes--and having my identity questioned.

So, after slapping renewal stickers on the back for 18 years down here in Florida, my photo reflects my age again. It looks like the "me" other people see again. Considering they told me I no longer have to wear glasses to drive, I can live with that after the 40-year restriction!

Best part ever: Florida no longer requires you to state your weight!

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MAYLEE425 7/29/2012 3:23AM

  You go, girl!

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GEMINIGEM6 7/29/2012 1:17AM

    I can SO relate! OMG my drivers license pic is HORRIBLE!!!! I have the hugest double chin and a dorky look on my face b/c I wasn't prepared either so I feel you on this. I must say though that I don't think your before DL pic was bad. You look great in the after too! The main thing is you look happy now. Congrats on all of your success!

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JEZEBELSK 7/29/2012 12:58AM

    What an amazing transformation! emoticon

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WILDFLOWERMA 7/28/2012 11:16PM

    You are radiant! And, please keep on celebrating yourself as often as possible.

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CAROL494 7/28/2012 8:53PM

  Wow! What a positive change in your photos! emoticon emoticon

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HHB4181 7/28/2012 6:27PM

    That's Awesome!!! emoticon

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SARAJANE_82 7/28/2012 5:22PM

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LDRICHEL 7/28/2012 4:51PM

    Great job, girl! You make me believe that I can get there too! :)

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LIVEDAILY 7/28/2012 4:24PM

    Absolutely wonderful!!

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Roadblocks

Wednesday, July 18, 2012



One of our challenges this week for RockIt is to write about two of our roadblocks that may prevent us from reaching our health goals. Both of mine have the same core principal.

FEAR.

FEAR OF FAILURE: I am a perfectionist. I have to do things perfectly or not do them at all. This doesn't fare well for my dreams in life, which are 1. To get to my goal weight and no longer be "obese" and 2. Publish a novel.

See, sometimes I just stand on the sidelines because it's better to not try at all and look like a fool, than try and fail. Right? Wrong. This is the very thinking I'm trying to obliterate, but it is what stalls me sometimes. I'm not the fastest runner. I will never be "perfect" at running. For me, it is an imperfect sport, and therefore it doesn't fit into the square cutout of my ideal -- but that is also the beauty of it. I can run and flail my arms about if I want to. (Remember the Friends episode where Phoebe runs?) Yes, I will look silly, but I would still be technically running. I would still be burning calories. With writing if I don't get words down on the page, there will be nothing to edit. So without my willingness to step out on the ledge and jump, there will be no story, no art, no beauty. Without being willing to jump, and possibly fall, I will remain the exact same person as I am today. No growth. No movement.

One of my favorite Woody Allen quotes is "A relationship, I think, is like a shark. You know? It has to constantly move forward or it dies." Well I think the same rings true for us as humans. We need to keep learning, and failing, and learning from those mistakes, to truly grow and become the people we were meant to be.

I am a comic geek, and love the quote Batman's father says to a young Bruce Wayne after he falls. "And why do we fall, Bruce? So we can learn to pick ourselves up.” It's hard but I do think that every setback makes us stronger and the next time a situation presents itself we handle it a little better each time. And then we may have a huge setback, but we always get back up.

FEAR OF SUCCEEDING: The opposite of fearing failure. Seems silly, right? But how many of us are overweight because of the protection that being larger offered us? (...Raises hand.) Being a larger woman I could be passed by and ignored. I have been mistreated in my life, in my past. By men. When I was a svelte size 6 and considered by some to be beautiful. After certain tragedies in my life, I turned to food. It not only comforted me, it padded me from the world and its risks. I lived over ten years of my life in this fat bubble. To be breaking out of it and seeing men staring at this new creature emerging, to have men open doors for me, to be flirted with, all of this is scary. Yes, I am married now to a wonderful man. But it doesn’t make that attention any less scary, not for someone who has been burned so badly that she is scarred.

I recently lost my childhood best friend unexpectedly. She was young, 37. It was her heart. And while we still talked via text, email and occassionally on the phone, we hadn't seen each other in almost 15 years. Why? Because I had gained 100 lbs. in the span of a year at the age of 24. And I was afraid for her to see me like that. I didn't want her to see what I had become....and felt that she would reject me. Would she have? No. But that was how I lived those 10 + years of my life, living in fear, staying indoors, not having the children we wanted...I lived in a prison that I created myself. This bubble is no longer serving me, and must be burst.

I am no longer going to let fear define, restrict or drive me.

Another quote from Batman, when Henri Ducard says to Bruce Wayne before training him “What you really fear, is inside yourself. You fear your own power .. your own anger... the drive to do great - (or terrible) - things.”

What if what I am really afraid of, in both of my roadblocks, is my own power? That I have the power inside of me to change? Perhaps it’s my own instinct to keep things at the status quo, to avoid change. Change is scary, right?

The thing is, we all have this power inside of us and I think that for me, once I reach my lowest weight (which coincidentally just happened before I hit my 11 month record-setting plateau), I get scared. I see a part of me I haven’t seen in such a long time. And terrible things happened to that smaller person. This weight has protected me, like a blanket. And sometimes shedding that blanket is much more mental than it is physical.

I am going to be strong and let my body take shape and know that now is not my past, I am not defined by my past, and I can step out into the light, and embrace the freedom that comes with it.




Our greatest fear is not that we are inadequate,
but that we are powerful beyond measure.

It is our light, not our darkness, that frightens us.
We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant,
gorgeous, handsome, talented and fabulous?

Actually, who are you not to be?
You are a child of God.

Your playing small does not serve the world.
There is nothing enlightened about shrinking
so that other people won't feel insecure around you.

We were born to make manifest the glory of God within us.
It is not just in some; it is in everyone.

And, as we let our own light shine, we consciously give
other people permission to do the same.
As we are liberated from our fear,
our presence automatically liberates others.

~ Marianne Williamson

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

GETTINGFIT4HIM 8/4/2012 3:18AM

  What a beautifully written, honest blog. Thank you for being brave enough to share your insights with others. It is very inspiring! I can relate very much to what you have experienced in allowing fear in any shape to hold us back and, my 5 year old son has recently decided he is Batman so that brought a smile for that reason, too. emoticon

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AMBER281 7/23/2012 12:54PM

    You are doing amazing!!!
Great blog.

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LINDAKAY228 7/19/2012 8:37AM

    Loved this and all the inspiration in it! I know what you mean about fear of failure and at the same time fear of success. I have to deal with those a lot also.
Have a great day today!

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SMALLERMELORIE 7/19/2012 8:26AM

    Well, you are not failing now. You have accomplished so much and you continue to accomplish. Great job.

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SUNNYWBL 7/19/2012 2:24AM

    I am a recovering perfectionist. I am more forgiving of my foibles.

Develop a healthy anger, if men give you any problems as you reach a wealthy weight. Though I found as I got older, I became invisible to most men! An almost pleasant discovery! emoticon

You CAN become a smaller and healthier person as long as you don't expect to be a size 6 again!

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NADINEL 7/19/2012 1:06AM

    I could have written this (some of it). This parallels some parts of my life, too. Except I waited 25 years to reconnect with a childhood friend. Amazingly, I am driving 3 hours one way tomorrow to see her. She drove 7 hours to see me and her relatives, too.
I would imagine that many people can relate to this blog.
I know you have the strength to overcome this and I really appreciate your candor in this blog. It absolutely hit home. I believe in you. emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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KATD13 7/19/2012 12:58AM

    emoticon

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ODDIPA78 7/19/2012 12:46AM

    So true, and so beautifully written!



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TEMPEST272002 7/18/2012 10:32PM

    Thank you for sharing your insights into your roadblocks. I relate completely. Fear is certainly one of my greatest roadblocks. Each time I push through that fear, I'm rewarded with more courage the next time. I imagine that it's the same for you. Step by step, we are getting stronger and wiser.

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KALANTHA 7/18/2012 9:34PM

    Actually, I think you are pretty fearless. It is difficult to be so introspective and honest, then to lay it out for public scrutiny. Kudos to you! This may be the push you need to get past your roadblocks.

I also think that there a probably many others here who have similar fears, who haven't been able to face them this honestly. This blog will help them.

Thank you for sharing your experience, insight, and wisdom.

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MOMFAN 7/18/2012 8:58PM

    emoticon

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POOKASLUAGH 7/18/2012 8:42PM

    I can really relate to that fear of failure. I have a tendency to sabotage myself any time I feel like I *might* fail, because then at least I didn't FAIL, I QUIT. It's stupid, and it's something I'm trying to get past, but it's hard.

And I have missed so many things because of my weight. My favorite singer did one concert with his new band four years ago. Just one. And I skipped it because I was fat. It's one of my life's goal to hear him sing live, but it's a tiny band and I know the singer in person, met him in 2007 when I was a lot thinner, and I didn't want him to see me after I'd gained an extra 40 lbs. Now, I'm kicking myself. I also avoided seeing friends of mine in town for years because of the weight, and events I wanted to go to. Shame ruled my life. Sucks.

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STARLIGHT615 7/18/2012 8:30PM

    Great blog Sweetie!! You will read all ur goals!! XOXO

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UNICORN212 7/18/2012 8:25PM

    emoticon

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DUXGRL1 7/18/2012 7:41PM

    Great blog!

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BABY_GIRL69 7/18/2012 6:51PM

    Amen. Thank you for this blog.

God bless,

Dee

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ASPENHUGGER 7/18/2012 6:19PM

    emoticon

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MUSOLF6 7/18/2012 6:12PM

    Thank you for sharing this great blog emoticon

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TRAVELGRRL 7/18/2012 5:26PM

    Everything you write comes from a place of honesty and truth and courage. What do you want to write? Fiction, nonfiction? Maybe one of your next goals is to take a creative writing class to help you express yourself. I would definitely read anything you publish! (I already read everything you don't...) emoticon

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LOOZINITNOW 7/18/2012 5:00PM

    Thank you for being so open and honest! I too struggle with many of the same fears. You are strong and beautiful and can overcome the obstacles.

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MANLEYSANDY 7/18/2012 3:50PM

    First, I am so sorry to hear about your friend...

Second, the first thing that entered my head when I started reading this was, you have not failed at all. Your triumphs are abundent, losing 100 pounds, beautiful childern, wonderful marriage, your educational accomplishments, your professional accomplishments, your unlimited faith, just to name a few!!! It is human to focus on what we have not done instead of all the things we have!! Crossing the finish line, which I know you have done numerous times can be tough, but I know you can do it!!!

Third, I to have that same kind of perfectionist streak in me, and it held me back in the world of exercise for a long time. I know you really love to run, and I think that is wonderful. For me, I hated it, but to be perfect I thought I had to do it. I realized it was holding me back from exercising altogether so I decided to worry less about what everyone else was doing, like at the gym when people run on the treadmill, and worry about what I was doing.

Lastly, You are a success in my book!!!



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MRSRHAWKINS 7/18/2012 3:36PM

    I can also identify with the fears. I always wonder what amazing things God has for me in this life that I am keeping the doors closed with my fears. You are an amazing writer. I cannot WAIT to read your novel. Please let us know when it is published! It will be awesome!

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MUSTANG_SALLY2 7/18/2012 3:10PM

    I can relate to so much of what you wrote in your blog. I hate living in fear. Now I'm wondering if I'm fearing my power. Hmmm... gives me something to ponder.

It will be fun to watch you bloom. I hope you will keep us posted. I'm cheering for you!

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KITHKINCAID 7/18/2012 2:56PM

    Here's why you don't have to be afraid of success. Even though bad things happened to you before when you were thin, it wasn't BECAUSE you were thin. It's because you were the person you were at that point, that then became the person you were when you put on weight. All of that was inside you, and therefore, you were susceptible to having those bad things happen. But the NEW you, the you that has grown wiser and experienced all of these things, the you who has risen above and conquered SO many things and achieved SO many successes is the you that you are now. Just as there is no going back to 300 pounds, there is no going back to that person who was a victim before. So feel free to succeed and bask in the success that your wisdom has bought you.

And running is amazing because when you run there are no mirrors (aside from store windows which I try to avoid). I have no idea what I look like when I run, but I FEEL beautiful. And it's one of the times when I really, truly do feel completely beautiful. Phoebe or not, I am that person that can do that thing. And so are you!

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JEANNETTE59 7/18/2012 2:56PM

  You are one amazing lady. Thanks so much for sharing your story, I and many others I'm sure, totally relate.

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JENJESS48 7/18/2012 2:28PM

    Oh honey, I know all about this. I was in an abusive relationship and anorexic as a teen, gained the weight as a protective layer, and have had to fight to get my mind and body back as an adult. Do we share a brain? :) One of the biggest revelations I've had on this journey is that not all attention from men is threatening. I can even finally see a lot of it as flattering. I hope some day you can come to that place, too, because it really helps you release the fear. Next time male attention startles you, remind yourself that you're not that scrawny, scared kid anymore. You are a powerful woman and a match for any man. Besides, I can almost guarantee you that he admires you and means you absolutely no harm. Accepting that we are physically beautiful is also hard for women like us, but you need to come to grips with that, too, babe. You're adorable and people are going to notice you. It doesn't mean anything at all about their intent, just that you're pleasant to look at. You are stronger than your fears, Kathy, and won't let them be roadblocks to your goal weight!

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IGSBETH 7/18/2012 1:49PM

    This is a great post. Admitting your fears makes you stronger. Thanks for sharing.

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INSPIREBYNATURE 7/18/2012 1:42PM

    You are such an amazing writer...an inspiration!!!!! I love how you took two opposing fears and fit them together...you are not your past....you are AMAZING! And we are no longer tight in a bud...we are blossoming! You are such an amazing woman and you have come such a long way in the last few years. I love you!

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Voted Popular Blog Post: View All Popular Posts

I Am Officially a Walk Star!

Monday, July 09, 2012

I just got a copy of Leslie Sansone's Walk at Home newsletter and I discovered that I am now officially a "walk star"! I'm the second story down, and the first story is my friend Nancy, who I met at the certification in April.

www.walkathome.com/walk-stars-storie
s/


This is a dream come true - what initially prompted me to start her program and lose weight was seeing a WAH newsletter with a picture of a Mom who lost 100 lbs. to be healthy for her 2 kids...I printed out that newsletter and wrote on it "This is going to be me! (dated 4/18/08)" (picture below).




Now I AM that Mom!



(Disclaimer: It took me longer than 24 months to achieve my 100+ lb. weight loss, it took over 3 yrs., that is a typo.)

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

JOANNHUNT 12/31/2012 1:07AM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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LISA_FRAME 9/19/2012 7:57PM

  emoticon

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MANILUS 8/5/2012 11:53AM

    That is amazing, congrats!

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GETTINGFIT4HIM 8/4/2012 3:08AM

  emoticon emoticon such an inspiration both in the weight loss and to know that Leslie's program works! Maybe one day we will both be Walk Leaders. Haven't given up dreaming about making it a reality! Congratulations!

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XHAPPYGIRLX 7/28/2012 10:45AM

    It isn't the amount of time that is important, it is the fact that you did it! Congratulations. You are now inspiring others to do the same :)

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DEBK0923 7/22/2012 1:07PM

    great blog

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35ANGELS 7/21/2012 11:36PM

    Awesome! I've seen you on the her facebook page. Love, Love, leslie.

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JIBBIE49 7/20/2012 5:56PM

    emoticonWhat an honor to have your blog featured in the Spark Mail. Sparks claims that the mail is read by one and a half million readers, so you are a GREAT inspiration to many today. emoticon

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GYMCHICK30 7/18/2012 9:53AM

    emoticon

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JSANGSTER7 7/17/2012 6:41PM

    That is awesome! You look fantastic. I have one of the 3 mile walk dvds here, I might have to go and find it.

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DOTTY7267 7/17/2012 2:30PM

    Congrats! Whether 2 or 3 yrs, it's still a fabulous thing that you have done.

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MUSTANG_SALLY2 7/16/2012 12:27PM

    Wow! Congrats! I love walking with her too. She's so peppy! LOL

Great job and keep going!

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EMILYDOODLE 7/16/2012 11:08AM

  congrats on your weight loss, look very good!

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IACTA_ALEA_EST 7/16/2012 7:14AM

    You are that walk star! Way to go!

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ANGELBABIES2 7/14/2012 10:02PM

    emoticon emoticon

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EJOY-EVELYN 7/14/2012 8:50PM

    What an incredible journey you've completed and now have made part of your every day living. Cheers to healthy living!

emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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LITTLEROX20 7/14/2012 1:36AM

    emoticon

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MISSB8604 7/13/2012 3:46PM

    Congrats!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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DEBK0923 7/13/2012 2:47PM

    great job, great blog

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SUSUSUZZZIE 7/13/2012 9:41AM

    Congratulations! Way to get it done!
emoticon emoticon emoticon

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ELLIEFUNT 7/13/2012 8:40AM

    Congrats!!!!

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ILOVEJIM851991 7/12/2012 10:44PM

    Good job emoticon

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LIVINHEALTHY9 7/12/2012 8:32PM

    Congratulations!
Way to Go!

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MBGUYER 7/12/2012 6:52PM

  emoticon

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SGOODRICHTX3221 7/12/2012 5:21PM

    That's great! Congratulations

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HAPPYWRITER7 7/12/2012 3:34PM

    Oh my goodness! That's awesome! Congratulations!!

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GBAUM0432 7/12/2012 3:32PM

  Looking Great

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ANGELBABIES2 7/12/2012 1:57PM

    emoticon you look great keep up the great work and always remember emoticon

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SEATOWN_GAL 7/12/2012 11:43AM

    Congratulations, you are a wonderful inspiration and should be so proud of yourself!

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PRINCESS1959 7/12/2012 11:02AM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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HHB4181 7/12/2012 10:29AM

    Incredible!! Congrats to you and all of your hard work!!
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HEALTHYN10 7/12/2012 10:08AM

    Congratulations!!! I walk for exercise as well, and you are an inspiration!

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CUDDLYPOLARBEAR 7/12/2012 9:20AM

    Great post....

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HAPPYCUPCAKE 7/12/2012 9:14AM

    WOW that's awesome! Congrats! :) :)

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MAGGIEROSEBOWL 7/12/2012 9:13AM

    How cool is that? We give ourselves a gift when we lost weight and get healthier, but it is really nice to get some notice for it from others too. I submitted my own story on the site, after I read yours, because I used Leslie's WAH program too. She's great and so are you!

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THEIS58 7/12/2012 8:22AM

    Wonderful! I love walking!

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SBNORMAL 7/12/2012 8:10AM

  I have her dvds and they are great!! Wonderful progress!!

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AMPROSKE1 7/12/2012 7:38AM

    Congratulations! I love Leslie Sansone!

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KIPPER15 7/12/2012 7:35AM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon

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CORGIGIRL2 7/12/2012 7:08AM

  I tried one of her videos but my knee started hurting. I think I'll give it another try! You look great!

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EWL978 7/12/2012 6:45AM

    Fantastic!! You gave a lot of folks here some reason to keep going, especially me! Thanx.

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NIKO27 7/12/2012 6:26AM

    emoticon

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4GREEN4 7/12/2012 6:03AM

 


emoticon

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WILSON1926 7/12/2012 5:52AM

    emoticon it might have taken you that long but YOU did it.
Congratulations
Michael

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BABS4625 7/12/2012 5:30AM

    emoticon

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TERRIJ7 7/12/2012 12:44AM

    FABULOUS! Walk ON!!

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MYSTERY-LADY1 7/11/2012 9:15PM

    emoticon

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HSMOM2FOUR 7/11/2012 8:33PM

    Super-fantastico!!!
Way to go!!

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LILSPARKIE85 7/11/2012 7:29PM

    emoticon

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SHOAPIE 7/11/2012 6:35PM

    emoticon emoticon

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My RockIt! Plan For the Week

Monday, July 02, 2012

MAIN CHALLENGE: For the main challenge this week, plan 3-5 workouts through out the week and complete them. Once you have your plan picked out, either post in your team or on your blog so that it is out there and we can help support you. Having a plan is one of the many steps that you can take to help you achieve your goals. Baby steps lead the way to your goals! Rock It! Ladies!!!!! These workouts need to be at least 30 minutes long and can be either strength training or cardio. Get it done ladies! You will feel AMAZING!

I will be going to Michigan tomorrow afternoon so I wanted to plan workouts that I could do in Michigan as well as here. The run scheduled for tomorrow morning depends on how I feel, I am still exhausted from the weekend, and drinking a few too many martinis...but without the run this still equals 5 workouts.

I also have a healthy eating plan for Michigan, eat all of my lunches and dinners with a salad, or make it into a salad. For example, if it's burgers I will have it minus the bun and put it into a salad with lots of veggies. Also striving for no grazing on chips and the like.

My planned workouts:

Monday: Teach Walk Live Class
Tuesday: Run in the morning
Wednesday: Swimming in the lake
Thursday: Lead a walk at the cottage with my family.
Friday: Walk
Saturday: Run in Michigan

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

THEEASYKILL30 7/7/2012 5:01PM

    Vacations/Travel are tough when it comes to maintaining the fitness routine... Best of luck with yours!

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KITHKINCAID 7/5/2012 3:53PM

    Hey Sweetie! Glad to see you're setting forth a kick-ass plan! You can totally do this. I think all of us have fallen into a case of the "Hot Hazy Summers". Drinking is too easy. Eating is too easy. And exercise is hard cause it's so hot. But you got this!

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MOMFAN 7/5/2012 4:18AM

    emoticon

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LINDAKAY228 7/3/2012 5:26PM

    Great plan! Have a wonderful time on your little vacation. SOunds like so much fun!

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ROBYNROSE26 7/3/2012 4:40PM

    Great plan Kathy!

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TEMPEST272002 7/3/2012 2:17PM

    Great plan. Walking is always a great option when you're away from home.

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JENJESS48 7/3/2012 10:45AM

    Great plan! Have fun in Michigan!

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ELLIEFUNT 7/3/2012 7:08AM

    emoticon

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LASKIE2 7/3/2012 6:57AM

    Where are area are you planing to visit in Michigan? What is a Walk Line Class? This sounds like a great plan!

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AMBER281 7/2/2012 8:18PM

    Awesome plan!
Have a great time on your trip.

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SAINTBERNARD6 7/2/2012 8:01PM

    I will be leaving Missouri for 6 to 8 weeks in Michigan on July 23.

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PLAYBLUES22 7/2/2012 6:39PM

    Sweetie just love the way you included your exercises into your trip out of town emoticon

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STARLIGHT615 7/2/2012 5:30PM

    Awesome Plan!!! Have a great time in MI

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CANNOTFATHOM 7/2/2012 5:19PM

    Great plan Kathy! Have fun on your trip!


Penny

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JEANNETTE59 7/2/2012 4:52PM

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MUSOLF6 7/2/2012 4:24PM

    great plans..... emoticon

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TRAVELGRRL 7/2/2012 3:14PM

    Vacations are a challenge, but part of life. I'm going next week!

You have an awesome plan, now Work It, Girl!!

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HEALTHY156 7/2/2012 2:57PM

    that sounds like an awesome plan! Enjoy your trip!

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TAZIAH 7/2/2012 2:53PM

    What an awesome plan while you're on vacation! I hope you have an amazing time! emoticon emoticon

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INSPIREBYNATURE 7/2/2012 2:51PM

    Great way to plan while you will be on vacation!!!!!! Love this!!!! Love you! Easy peasy!

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