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LOSINGJESS's Recent Blog Entries

feeling festive ~ whats your most memorible christmas from childhood?

Tuesday, December 21, 2010

I was thinking about traditions I want to start with my own family and it got me to thinking about christmas when I was a kid.
I was just wondering what all of your most memorible christmas as a child was?

mine was when I was about 10 years old. I think this was the last year I actually beleived there was a santa clause.

Me, my parents and my 4 other brothers and sisters were living in low income public housing at the time and my parents had very little money for anything, let alone christmas presents. My parents went to a charity and they gave them one new gift to give each of us and that was all the christmas we were going to have.

That Christmas eve I can remember sitting up with my sisters and watching the skies above our house watching for santa and I think we saw a plane or something and got really excited because we thought the red light blinking was roudolph. lol.

That next morning we came down stairs and there was presents stacked up around the tree against the wall... I swear the stack for the 5 of us was up to the top of the tree. mountains of presents, I still have the image in my head, it was quite impressive.

It took us forever to open them all and everyone was so excited. And I can distinctly remember opening up a doll and my sister looking over at it and going "Hey I use to have a doll just like that!" :-)

lol, turns out that like so many other parents my parents rotated toys... when we would get new toys they would take the old ones and put them in a box and store them to rotate in again....

When they found out that they were only going to be able to give us one gift a piece they went and took all our old toys and wrapped them up for us... they also went to the thrift store and got alot of other used toys. we never knew any different until we were much older and my parents told us about it.

I cant remember any of the toys really but I remember it was so much fun opening them all and every single one of my siblings (except my brother who was a baby) remembers that Christmas.


Whats your most memorable childhood Christmas?

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MORRIS1989 12/30/2010 6:43PM

    What a beautiful story! My favorite one is my mother baking cookies and we in the kitchen trying to help her but we were making a mess.

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LOSINGJESS 12/22/2010 10:38AM

    Wow. The pogo stick story is a little sad. I guess it taught you a lesson on present snooping. It's always so much funner when christmas is a surprise.

I can't say I havent been tempted to peak in my hubby's closet at my gifts though. Wish he would get them wrapped already. lol.


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NIKKIV2 12/21/2010 9:54PM

    What a wonderful memory! Thanks for sharing!

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KENNYWHEELS 12/21/2010 8:13PM

    Wow Jess, that was such a great story, thanks for sharing

kenny emoticon

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ANGELBELIEVER 12/21/2010 8:01PM

    Thanks for sharing that memory with us. Sounds like you had a great Christmas after all. I remember the year I had asked for a pogo stick and was rumaging around in my parents closet where I wasn't supposed to be. Well, I found my pogo stick...I then realized there was no Santa.. and I had to fake surprise on Christmas morning. I didn;t tell Mom till years later!

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DONNAEDA 12/21/2010 5:38PM

    sounds like a wonderful memory

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Original Spark Goals

Tuesday, December 21, 2010


203 lbs. ACHIEVED!!!

199 lbs. ACHIEVED!!

180 lbs. ACHIEVED!

160 lbs. ACHIEVED!

150 lbs.

145 lbs.

Fit into size 10 - 12 Jeans ~ ACHIEVED!!

Be able to complete workout videos without feeling like dieing ~ ACHIEVED!!!

Be able to shop in the normal side of the store ~ ACHIEVED!!! ~ (FALL 2009)

Do modified push-ups ~ ACHIEVED!!! JAN 2010!

Do regular push-ups

No longer morbidly obese ~ ACHIEVED!

No longer obese ~ ACHIEVED! 2/13/10

No longer overweight ~ ACHIEVED!! FALL 2010

wear a skirt without my thighs rubbing together ~ ACHIEVED! 8/1/10

Wear a slutty Halloween costume without scary the crap out of people. lol.

love my self inside & out ~ ACHIEVED!!!

Become a spark people motivator ~ ACHIEVED!!! 2/18/10

run 5k race ~ ACHIEVED! 6/4/10

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

DAVEW175 12/26/2010 4:57AM

    Fantastic accomplishments. I'm sure you'll have a great 2011 as well.

I love the new profile picture!

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MAMAFEELGOOD 12/22/2010 11:22AM

    Congratulations on meeting so many goals

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BRENDAF761 12/22/2010 11:07AM

    Keep up the great efforts! Best wishes for continued success in 2011! Happy Holidays! emoticon emoticon

Comment edited on: 12/22/2010 11:09:18 AM

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LOSINGJESS 12/22/2010 10:34AM

    My 2011 goals so far are on my spark page under goals.

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MAMASALLYSOCKS 12/21/2010 11:27PM


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DONNAEDA 12/21/2010 5:41PM

    congratulations you over achiever you,........... I am so proud of you I could burst my buttons

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-FEMALE- 12/21/2010 1:42PM

    WTG!!! YOU ROCK!!!

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ANGELBELIEVER 12/21/2010 12:42PM

    emoticon Look at you! emoticon You Did It. You are an emoticon inspiration to all that one can achieve any goal if you put your mind to it and do what needs to be done . Merry Christmas and a Happy, Healthy New Year. emoticon

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HARMONYBLUE 12/21/2010 12:29PM

    You rock! So what will your 2011 spark goals be??

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SPARKYJEANIE1 12/21/2010 12:21PM


You have come such a long, long way. Nothing is impossible - you're living proof!

Love ya!!!

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Excellent day & an ultimatum

Friday, December 17, 2010

well yesterday was great. I had the best day as far as eating goes that I have had in weeks. I tracked everything, I stuck to my plan and I did not feel out of control at all. I also got in an hour of exercise.

As a result I feel like today is going great as well.... I feel really confident that I'm heading in the right direction again.

Its so weird how you can struggle so hard for weeks to have that one good day... and once you have it, it sets everything in place and you just feel like your back on that wagon, instead of chasing it or walking in the other direction.


The night before last night I was telling my husband about how I'm excited to Join the YMCA. I have been wanting to join for a while now but we were never in the position for me to be able to join. For one, I don't have a drivers license. I don't really tell people that, that often because I find it embarrassing that I am a mother of two and almost thirty years old and I have never gotten my license. The reason behind that is when I was 16 my parents could not afford to put me on there car insurance... and after that I could not ever afford to get my own... then when I got married me and my husband still could not afford it... and unlike a few years ago where once you reached a certain age the price went down... now it only goes down after you have been insured and driving for like 3 - 5 years! It sucks.

Anyway I was not able to drive to the gym if I wanted to and we could not afford the membership fee anyway.

This year we got two credit cards and a few other bills paid off so we are in a better place and I told my husband that I wanted the membership to the Y for Christmas. It was actually really easy to talk him into it, especially since after this month I wont be paying for weight watchers anymore (that's 40 bucks a month).

But anyway, back to two nights ago. I was telling him about how much I was struggling to stay on track and he asked "what if you don't make lifetime?" .... cause you have to be no more than two pounds over your goal weight, 6 weeks after making it. And I said... "oh well, If I don't make it, its no big deal. I would rather just have the gym membership anyway"

That's when he told me that I could not join the Y unless I made lifetime. emoticon
I was like, you never said anything about that. He told me that I had worked way to hard to not do this and if I wanted the gym membership then I better start working to get it.

I dident really put up a fight about it. I think its really sweet that he cares enough about me and my goals that he would say something like that. It really gives me alot of added motivation to work really hard for the next two weeks.
I really love my hubby so much.

After that the next day I put everything I had into my day and it came out great. I have that reward to look forward to in the future and its helping to push me. Another good motivation is even though I don't think I have gained much weight, I can tell hubby has put back on about 20 pounds since summer. I know that is my fault because I have been bringing things in the house that are bad for all of us. I have also been making him bigger portions and super bad for him mixed drinks at night. I want to help get him back on track too.

He even said he might come workout with me once we get the membership.... we are getting a family membership, which will be really great. That is a huge thing for him to say because it was like pulling teeth to get him out at the park to take a walk with me, when we started all this two years ago. He always thinks people are going to think bad about him because of his weight. He cares way too much about what others think. Maybe that self consciousness is fading a bit.

well Im off to have another great day... and then a great weekend after that.

You do the same!


  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

CRK910 12/23/2010 11:27AM

    Thats awesome. I go to the Y 3 times a week for strength training. I have a treadmill at home so I go there, do my strength training and toss in some cardio and head home.

I am so proud of you for all you have accomplished and there is no doibt in my mind that you will continue to meet your goals.

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KENNYWHEELS 12/20/2010 5:20PM

    That is awesome jess, don't feel to bad about the driver's license, I did not get mine till I was 28yrs old. Failed 3 times when I was 18 and never went back


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MALEXANDER4 12/17/2010 9:39PM

    Jess your going to make lifetime...no problem. You have to now, you have the y to join. I've been thinking about joining ours here. but I'm going to have to wait till after the holidays. Broke is broke. lol.

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NURSE_FAWN 12/17/2010 7:44PM

    What a wonderful Christmas gift and a wonderful hubby!

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ROCKINFOX 12/17/2010 3:21PM

    Sounds like your hubby is very supportive. Yay for gym memberships for the family!

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RORYTA 12/17/2010 2:53PM

    You are doing great. am glad ur getting ur membership. Sometimes its easier to workout at the gym. it's like that for me.

Good on ur husband for opening up enough to get himself a membership as well. good luck to u and him :D

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CINDYLUFUS 12/17/2010 2:15PM

    I joined the YMCA with my hubby 8 weeks ago and it was the best decision I ever made. We go there 5 days a week, usually after work I meet him there. We are a great support system for each other and there are days I wouldn't go except I know that he needs me there. Pushes you to keep going :) I am so excited for you!

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HONORINGGOD 12/17/2010 2:11PM

    thank you emoticon you were right on

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HOPE2011 12/17/2010 1:52PM

    Glad to hear you had such a great day! And good luck with reaching Lifetime - you can do it! emoticon

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Another Try

Thursday, December 16, 2010

well I have decided that I am going to try the new weight watchers plan again.

My e tools really help me... I need them. And I have found if I stick to my plan of eating healthy then the two plans don't really differ in points so much. My problem is when I start nibbling on things I am suppose to stay away from, or eat in moderation.... then my points start edging up (especially on the new plan because these things are much higher in points on the new plan)

I went into the new program to start with trying to build on what I had already been doing before and that is hard to do with anything new.... trying to build ontop of the old is never a good idea and its frustrating.

I decided I need to go into this with a fresh mindset. I think a fresh start would do me a world of good because I have been feeling like I'm floundering... and I hate that feeling.

So I went onto the weight watchers website today for the first time in a week and erased all the food I had saved. There were like 150 different foods that I had entered before that needed to be recalculated for the new program and that was very overwhelming to me. I don't even know if I will be eating these foods any time soon so there is no need to bog myself down with them... so they are gone.

I went through my house and got rid of everything resembling a christmas cookie... My mother in law sent home a big tub full of them and all I have been doing for the past week is picking at them and having one here and one there and its making me crazy. So they are gone now and will stay gone.
Egg nog went too.

I love the holidays but its killer when your trying to stay on track. I did not have nearly this much trouble last year.... and I know thats because I did not let the crap in the house. I thought that this year I could handle it.... you know Im all skinny now so I am suppose to have the will power of a rock....

I dont! I never will..... Im just going to have to keep that in mind for the rest of my life. No matter how much weight I lose, and no matter how long I keep it off, I am always going to love to eat and love to eat alot! If there is a plate of christmas cookies sitting around I cant eat one and not think about them for the rest of the day. I will eat one and then the plate will call to me every moment from then on, until I have another or until they are out of my house. There for its a bad idea for me to have them in the house. The kids have been eating waaaaay too many cookies lately anyway .... and I dont want my kids to end up with the same problems I have.

So healthier snacks will be replacing the cookies, in my cookie jar. Something that I wont want to eat a truck load of.

Im going to look at from here on out as a fresh start. I have gotten to comfortable where I am now and have even thought about trying just not to worry about losing the weight until the first of the year. Its easy to do that around this time. I dont want to back track though because I know it will be hard to get back to where I am now.

Someone here on spark said that the reason it has gotten hard for me to lose right now is because Im at my "Happy Weight".... I think that is so true. I have gotten to a point where I feel comfortable in my own skin... Im not completely satisfied with my weight yet, but if I stayed this weight for the rest of my life, I would not be misrible. I dont want to settle for just feeling OK about myself though. I want to be really truely happy and proud of where I have gotten to. This is not the weight yet.

So I am going to try and start fresh in my mind. Hopefully I will gain a little of that fresh motivation back and start moving forward again.

I weigh in at weight watchers on saturday. I did not weigh in last week because I was at my inlaws on saturday... I just hope I did not gain that much weight in the past two weeks. I have been really trying to stay on track but its not been going great. I guess we will see.

~ Jess

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MALEXANDER4 12/17/2010 7:11AM

    Starting fresh with etools is a good idea. I will give that a try. I have kept a lot of what I was eating. I've gotten away from chips and such with my lunch and now eat carrot sticks. I love them and really I don't miss the chips. As for christmas cookies, cakes, you name it they call my name. I'm not one of those people that can eat just one of anything. Best to not have it. Good luck to you this week. this is my second week on plan and I had a slight gain... of 0.4. Pms i'm sure hoping is what added to my waist line this week. Now onwards and upwards to better weigh ins for both of us.

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HOPE2011 12/16/2010 2:29PM

    You can do it, Jess! Whatever you make your mind up to do, I know you'll do it! emoticon

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MKELLY72 12/16/2010 1:01PM

    I love your new take on your situation. You sound so positive and committed. You are still so inspiring! Way to go!

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DONNAEDA 12/16/2010 10:34AM

    congratulations on your new attitude. Yes, I had to throw out the old WW mindset because I was at goal and knew what I could eat and not eat, and have adopted the new points plus program. It is different, I have joined e-tools to help me and I have found that I like this program so much better. I haven't lost any weight, but I have stayed within 5 pounds of my goal. I too am satisfied with the way I look and feel, could I loe more, of course, are we ever satisfied? So enjoy the holidays and nibble on healthy snacks like the rest of us.

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HULLAF 12/16/2010 10:25AM

    Hang in there, Jess! You CAN do it.

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SUGIRL06 12/16/2010 10:06AM

    Great idea! Sometimes you just need that extra little support. Good luck with weight watchers!

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JANRTEACH 12/16/2010 9:31AM

    Jess -- You have learned the terrible truth about cookies. I really think they are dangerous!! I gained back 40 pounds one time just because the dang cookies tasted so delicious and sent me spiraling!!! At 5'8" 161 is probably a great weight. It almost sounds skinny. Good luck on your new plan and have a great time. You deserve it!!

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DEBBIEKAY1 12/16/2010 8:23AM


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SHESTOUGH 12/16/2010 8:13AM

    I haven't done Weight Watchers, though I've heard fantastic things about them (I've just used Spark so far) but I have the same problem as you -- NIBBLING! I've slowly been working towards it and getting it out of my system quick! Here are a few things that I've done that have helped me stop the nibbling (especially at night):

- Put the dishes away immediately and pack up any extra leftover food from the meal so it's not there taunting you after you've taken your serving. That will help with going back for seconds.

- After you're finished eating, chew a piece of gum. It creates saliva and the sugary taste sometimes gives off the appeal of dessert which is far less calories than a piece of chocolate cake or a candy bar! It also helps fend off heartburn!

- Once you've finished eating for the night, brush your teeth and/or rinse your mouth out with a fluoride based mouth wash. Because of the fluoride, you're not allowed to eat or drink anything for at least a half hour due to the process to help strengthen your enamel - by the time your half hour is up, you won't be willing to snack anymore! And if you are, drink water!

- 90% of the time you think you're hungry, you're actually just thirsty! Drink more water!

Good luck and happy Sparking!!! Make today GREAT!

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_COSMOPAULATAN_ 12/16/2010 7:48AM

    It sounds like you are bound and determined! You can do this Jess!

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Plan for wednesday

Tuesday, December 14, 2010

Goals - stick to smaller planned meals
drink a glass of water with each meal
Exercise for 60 minutes
Find something to do other than eat when I feel like nibbling

Daily points target: 22

Breakfast - 1 egg fried - 2 pts
1 slice toast - 1 pt
1.5 slices turkey bacon - 1 pt
sauteed Veggies - 0 pts

Lunch - 2 slices double fiber bread - 2 pts
Turkey breast lunch meat - 1 pt
Tomato, lettuce and onion - 0pts
1/2 can light progresso soup - 1 pt

Snack - 1 cup cereal - 2 pts
1/2 cup fat free milk - 1 pt

Dinner - 3oz chicken breast - 3 pts
1 cup whole wheat pasta - 3 pts
1/2 cup pasta sauce - 2 pts
1/2 cup cooked spinach - 0 pts

Snack - apple cup - 2 pts
1/2 cup fat free frozen yogurt - 1 pt

Total Points used : 22 points



  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MESEATURTLE 12/15/2010 2:26AM

    Great plan!!

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CORINA81 12/14/2010 9:52PM

    I love following Weight Watchers points system so much easier then counting calories I think.

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HONORINGGOD 12/14/2010 9:40PM

    emoticon idea plan ,plan ,plan

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