Sunday, November 21, 2010
well I had a great birthday yesterday... as you know I reached my ww goal which is a gift in itself.
My sisters gave me some really awesome gifts, including some dark kiss lotion and body spray from bath and body works... mmm smells so good, a new table cloth and new pot holders... yay. I asked for all kitchen stuff this year.
My mom came down and gave me some new ear rings, that were really cute and then me and my husband took her out to dinner (it was her birthday two days ago so that was my gift to her)... we went to a japanese hibatchi place... the kind where they cook the food in front of you. I had miso soup, a salad with ginger dressing, we got three sushi rolls to split and then me and my husband split the chicken & steak and the Salmon & shirmp entree, which came with veggies, fried rice and noodles.
After that we went to go see the new harry potter movie. It was really well done compared to alot of the other movies. There were some things in it that really did not match up with the other movies though, things that were in the books but not put in the previous movies.... you would be lost if you had never read the books. But all in all it was really good.
I asked my hubby to stop by a local diner near our house on the way home. They have the best cheesecake and I wanted a slice, I have been planning on eating a slice of cheesecake from there for the entire year. I love cheesecake, its my favorite but I have made a deal with myself that I will only eat it once a year on my birthday because then that keeps it special and I dont have to worry about how high the points are.... because its only that one time.
They were out of the new york style cheesecake.... it was karyoke night and I geuss everyone there had a taste for plain cheesecake. :-(
So I went to the grocery store and ended up getting a sample pack of 4 slices.... I just wanted one big slice but it was either the sample pack of 4 tiny slices or buying a whole cheesecake to get my one big slice (which I knew would turn into the whole 8" cake by today)
So me and hubby split the pack of 4 slices. It was not the best but it satisfied my need for cheesecake once a year. and I am so done with it till next year.
I was so full last night I felt kinda ill. Even though I only ate half of my meal at dinner and did not get snacks in the movie theater I still ate waaay more then I normaly do and it was alot of points.... I added up the points for yesterday and it came up to around 60 points. My daily allotment is 22, so thats alot. I used up the majority of my weekly points on my birthday.
You know what though, I really enjoyed it and I know that I will make up for it this week. I am back on track this morning. I used the measuring cup to measure out my shredded wheat and fat free milk and I plan on exercising today too.
Overeating happens, its nice to be in a place now where I can jump right back to eating well the next meal. That makes me really happy.
One sad thing about yesterday though that really bothers me is how little my mom ate at dinner. I really wanted to take her somewhere nice and she did not hardly touch her food. I think it was because she was self consious about her weight. She lost alot of weight last year... she had gone from like 200 down to 150 lbs because the doctor gave her diet pills. Well she stopped taking them and guess what happened. :-( .... Now a year later she weighs more than I have ever seen her weigh. She looks like she is almost as big as I was when I started and it makes me really sad for her. I can just see this look on her face every time I see her. Expecially last night because she has not seen me in 20 pounds.
I really wish she would get her head in a good place to do this too... but you cant make someone take thouse steps, they have to be ready on there own. I of all people know that.
On a lighter note though overall the day was really good, overeating aside. Im looking forward to another great week.
Hmmm.... I just thought of this though... if thanksgiving is this week and I used all of my weekly points on my birthday.... hmmm, this is gonna be interesting. I think I may need to tweak my thanksgiving menu some more and make it even lighter. It will be interesting to try and eat on target that day, but I enjoy a challenge.
Saturday, November 20, 2010
Well this morning I got up early and felt really good about today. For one its my 29th birthday and I have a really fun day planned. Im going out to eat later today with my mom and my husband and then we are going to go see harry potter.
I also felt good because I have done really really well this week... I stuck to my eating and got in around 40 minutes of exercise M-F.
I needed 1.8 to reach the goal I set at weight watchers and I have been trying to make it for a few weeks now but I will only lose a few oz. and I even gained one week. I had really been struggling.
I really pushed this week because how cool would it be to make goal on your birthday!
So I nervously got up on the scale at my 7:30am meeting and when my leader held up two fingers I said .... "2 pounds?"
She shook her head yes and I started jumping up and down... I could feel the tears welling up. lol.
I pulled out a sheet of paper with something I had written out last night on the computer. I knew if I reached my goal today then my leader would want me to share my story with everyone and I knew I needed to write it down because I would leave somthing out or be so flustered I could not compose my thoughts. thats just how I am.
When it was time for my leader to announce my 100lbs lost and reaching my goal I handed her the sheet of paper and asked her to read it... because I knew I would cry. and I started crying as soon as she started reading so it was a good thing.
here is what I wrote
I have been overweight since I was a baby. When I graduated high school I weighed around 310 lbs. I went on my first diet shortly after high school and my weight went up and down for years as I went on one fad diet after another. I would “diet” for a week or two but after not getting the quick fix I wanted I would eat everything in sight as I went on a month long binge and gained everything back plus some.
By the time 2009 rolled around I had just had my 2nd child and was 273 pounds. I could not play with my kids because I would get to tired, I could not shave my legs in the shower because I would get out of breath bending over, I could not put my pants on standing up because it hurt to lift my legs and The only clothes I had that would fit me were 3X maternity clothes, that I was quickly growing out of.
At the time I didn’t think I would ever be thin, I had pretty much given up hope on that a while ago but I knew I could not go on living the way I was. I knew I needed to change my mind set because the quick fixes I tried in the past never worked. I told myself that I would do this and no matter if I only lost a quarter pound a week I would not stop.
I started my weight loss journey on Jan 3rd 2009 at 273lbs. I started by just eating smaller portions and lower calorie foods but after a few weeks I decided to join weight watchers. I had done weight watchers once before and done well for the few weeks I stuck with it. I knew I needed the accountability of the meetings because even though I had lost 13 lbs. on my own I could feel myself slipping.
Shortly after that I decided to start exercising. Every other time I tried to lose weight before, exercise was something that was missing. I would always work out for a few days and then just get sick of it and quit. I could never get into a routine. This time I started with baby steps because I knew for me to stick to anything I needed to build it into a habit. So I started with the most minimal exercise I could think of; walking in place in front of the TV.
After almost two years I have lost over 100 lbs. and around 150 lbs. since high school. I ran my first 5k this past summer, I am now able to shop in the normal side of the store and am wearing a small - medium in shirts and a size 12 in pants. Shopping in the normal side of the store is something I had never been able to do, not even in middle school! I can now wrap a normal size bath towel around me instead of a beach towel, I have become a good role model for my children, and have even helped my husband lose 90 pounds just by cooking healthier meals for our family.
This has been the hardest, greatest, most wonderful thing I have ever done for myself and my family. I have learned so much in the past two years and have grown more than I thought I could from just learning to live healthy. I have no fears that I wont be able to maintain my weight loss because I know I now have the tools and support I need to keep me on track.
I am so excited for the years to come and to finally be able to live my life with nothing holding me back.
By the time she was finished reading half of the people in the room where crying! I was really shocked over that because I did not expect my story to move so many. I had people come up and hug me and tell me how inspired they are by me... there was a man who was around 50 years old and you could see the streaks left on his face where he had cried... wow.
I got my 100lb charm for my key chain and in 6 weeks I will be a lifetime member. I am so so happy. I am not at my final goal yet... I have a personal goal of 150 lbs.... but It feels like I have gotten there already even though I know this is not the end. I am so incredibly proud of myself.... that is an amazing feeling in its self because I really truely did not think I would ever be able to do this.
I think the most wonderful part of it all was a lady came up to me at the end of the meeting and she was crying. She said she was planning on quitting after today because she was just fed up with the whole thing. She said that she was going to stick with it because of me. That has to be the most rewarding feeling of all because I know how painful it is to be where she is now and how frustrating it is when your on that road and it seems like you cant get any farther along. I hope that one day she will get to where I am now and feel how happy and proud I am.
Its already a great Birthday.
Happy Saturday everyone!
Tuesday, November 16, 2010
Yesterday my sister decided to take me out to eat dinner for my birthday.... my birthday is this coming Saturday.
We went to eat at a Chinese buffet that I really like, it has hibachi where you can pick out what veggies and meat and sauce you want and they cook it up for you... and sushi... I have been having a huge craving for sushi lately.
Anywhoo I was really mindful while eating. I got my hibachi with just some veggies and shrimp... I told the dude cooking "NO Butter!" ... they usually ladle butter on the grill before cooking your food which can add easily a few hundred calories. Then I got some teriyaki sauce on it. It was really good.
I split a plate of sushi with my sister, staying away from mayo sauce and fried stuff.
And then I got a few of the extra little things that I really like, 1 or two small peices of sesame chicken, wonton soup (I only ate about 1/3 of the wonton and soup was bland to did not eat any of that) a dumpling and a few fried cheese wontons.... yum! I remember when I use to come to this restaurant and eat an entire plate stacked with like 20 cheese wontons. Wow I have come a long way since then, its no wonder I was almost 300 lbs!
Dinner ended up coming up to about 15 points, which is kinda high and all but I had the forethought to eat very lightly for breakfast and lunch and stayed on track for the day! Go me!
Later we went up to the mall. I got my hair cut for the first time in almost 2 years. I got my hair cut about two months into my weight loss journey and it was horrible. I ended up with boy hair cut up to my ear... you can look at my progress pics to see that hack job.
I usually go really short... I have every time I have ever gotten my hair cut. I get it cut short and then grow it out to about my shoulders and get it all cut off again. This time I only got about 1/2 an inch cut off of it. Very different for me. I geuss I always wanted something that was really dramatic... I was just concerned with doing something that looked good this time and something that would work for me. I guess I have changed some in the last few years.
I was very specific this time and I brought a picture. It was a few pictures of Kristen Stewart, the actress who plays Bella on Twilight. I thought her hair would really work for me since her hair type is wavy like mine and she has sort of a square face like me too.
Hair cut came out awesome but the lady was not a very good hair dresser... she kept whipping my hair in my face for one and when she styled it I felt like she was going to rip it all out at the roots. not a very pleasurable hair cut but at least I got what I wanted. She waaaay over product it though so my hair was hard as a brick... When I got home I had to take a hammer and chisel to it. lol.
After that we went over to a store called Maurices - www.maurices.com ... they had a lot of clothes I really liked. I'm not in a position to buy anything right now because I don't have the money but I thought it might be fun to try on skinny girl clothes. I have not really had a chance to do that yet because Im always out with my husband when I go out and you know how guys are when you try to try on anything. He would not have been happy about me trying on an entire armful of clothes that I had not intention of buying.
My sister on the other hand was more than happy to join in on my little fashion adventure though. She took her roll as my personal fashion consultant and started pulling things off the racks for me to try on. I just let her, I don't really have any since of fashion yet.... I have never been able to wear clothes like that, its only been t shirts and jeans for me... because thats all I could ever find to wear because hell if I was paying Lane Bryant prices. lol.
So I started trying stuff on and I was looking really good. At one point I remember saying out loud "Damn, I'm hot!" It was more in an astonished tone though... lol, Like I was just realizing something. I realize its much easier to feel good about yourself when your clothes fit right and are flattering. I'm really looking forward to getting a little bit of extra money around tax return time and buying myself some new outfits.
It was fun and made me feel alot better about myself, I think everyone should do something nice for themselves now an then, it really helps put you in a better mood... I felt kinda bad for the sales girl though, she was looking pretty excited when I had like 300 dollars worth of stuff to try on. She kept coming up to the dressing room door and pitching credit card offers and stuff. I re-shelved the stuff myself though so she couldn't be too upset. :-P
Have a Great Tuesday!
Monday, November 15, 2010
10 years ago I was shopping in the thrift store and found this beautiful vintage dress that I just loved. I was 310 lbs at the time and knew that I would most likely never wear this dress because it was tiny. No size in it, but tiny. A size I could never imagine ever being.... ever! But You know when your that big you always have that dream that one day you will be able to really do it and get "skinny".
This dress has been hanging in my closet for 10 years and I have almost given it away several times but I held on to it because I love it so much.
Currently I am about an inch or two away from getting it zipped. so freakin close.
I would like to wear this dress on christmas but its gonna really take alot of commitment on my part. I need to not skip my workouts and I need to stick to my plan for eating.
I feel good about it though and I am really looking forward to being able to wow my family on christmas.
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